Don went to a customer and started filling drinks.
Fish fry? I looked on the wall and finally read the flyer. All you can eat Fish Fry Saturday Night. Proceeds to benefit Colin O’Driscoll currently on the waiting list for a new heart. He was diagnosed when he was a year old with Barth syndrome, a genetic heart condition.
Then I looked at the picture on the jar. I’d never even looked at it. The money we had at the compound seemed so useless to me that it only made sense that I drop it in some donation box. There was a little boy who looked like he was only a few years old with Trisha’s smile. He was smiling and wearing a Bears jersey and holding a football. Way too young to need such a big surgery.
“Where’s he at?”
“Huh?” Don asked while making circular motions with his towel.
“Um…Colin…Trisha’s boy. Is he at home or a hospital?”
“The U. Ambulance took him there a few days ago.”
“Thanks, man.”
“You want me to tell her you stopped by?”
“No. It’s no big deal.”
Rushing from the bar, I headed north. She always put up such a front with me. Nothing ever being wrong. That was my fault. I never let on that she was more than that to me.
The hospital was quiet with just a few people mulling around. A few patients being walked in their hospital gown and slipper socks while using an IV pole for support. The pediatric wing had pictures of smiling kids and bright colors compared to the muted browns, greens, and blues of the hallway. In the far corner of the ward I saw a sealed off room with a little boy on a vent. Bent over the bed holding his hand was Trisha. She looked exhausted and her head was lying on his leg.
“Excuse me, sir, are you here to see someone?” A nurse raised her hand to stop me from entering the ward.
“Colin…Colin O’Driscoll. I’m a friend of the family.”
She looked at me and I flashed my smile. It always worked. I could see her calm almost immediately and I knew I was in. Walking slowly, I stopped outside the sliding door. I looked at Trisha, unsure of how to proceed. Why did I come? This was stupid, but I needed to be here for her. Her head turned and our eyes met. She looked as if she had been caught doing something wrong. I think we both stopped breathing.
Composing herself, she turned back to Colin, stood up, and kissed his hand through her facemask then came to the door. It slid like it was on air. Pulling down her mask she looked at me with her lips twitching and pulling tight. I didn’t need to hear her speak to know what she felt. My arms wrapped around her and the tough front she always put up disappeared. Her body went lax and needed me to hold it up.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked selfishly, feeling the biohazard yellow smock she had to wear. “I’d have been here for you.”
“We aren’t that way.”
“I think we are, we just don’t want to admit it.”
Her head tilted up and she looked at me. With my finger I pulled down the mask so I could see her whole face as I stroked her jaw line with my thumb.
“What?”
“You’re my friend.”
“Right. Your friend with benefits. Look, Jimmy, this is too much to pull you into. You’re a great guy and thanks for coming here, but you are my escape from this. And I’m your escape from whatever that girl puts you through.”
“What girl?”
“I took a few hours today and was at the mall.”
“KK? You saw me with KK?”
“I didn’t ask her name, but it’s obvious…”
“She’s my partner. At my job. She had some really hard news come at her today. Trust me, she’s just my friend.”
“I’m your friend. What happened to your face?”
“Oh, you noticed that, did you? Her husband. He had the same stupid ass thoughts you did.”
“Maybe there’s something there you don’t want to admit to.”
“The only thing I’ve been stopping myself from admitting is the fact I care for you. I have for a long time, but talking to Kiriana today I realized what I fear may not be as bad as I thought it was.”
“Jimmy.”
“I can’t be serious. I know. I’m just a kid. I don’t understand.”
“It’s not that.” She sighed, then smiled at me. “Can you do me a favor?”
“What do you need?”
“A motel room. Colin’s in a medically induced coma for at least another thirty-six hours. If they can knock out this infection they’ll bring him around. I don’t want to go home just in case, but I don’t want to sleep another night here either.” She pulled away from me and ran her hand over her hair and sighed. “I don’t think I’ve showered for a few days. God, I must smell awful.”
“You smell great. You’re sure? I can hang with you here.”
“I need to breathe. But I can’t go too far…” She started to choke up and I got the feeling Colin was worse off than she was letting on.
“Let me make a few calls and I’ll find a way to stay with you tonight.”
“You don’t…thank you.” She placed her hand on my forearm.
“Are you sure I’m old enough to get a hotel room?” I joked and she smiled for just a second. I walked back out to the corridor and dialed. The phone rang twice and I heard a very confused voice on the other end.
“Hello?”
“Dilana, I need a favor.”
“Favor?” Sure it was a foreign concept, but she must have heard of it once or twice. “What kind of favor?”
“Can you pull a double?”
“Double what?”
“I can’t fight tonight. I need you to work my shift.”
“Are you serious?”
“If it wasn’t important I wouldn’t ask.”
“How drunk do you plan on getting?”
“I’m not drunk.”
“Not yet…”
“Look, D, you’re the only one I can ask and I need it. I’ll owe you big. You want to take that honeymoon with Kiyoshi that’s a few hundred years overdue?”
“How many days we talking about?”
“I don’t know yet.”
“Fine, but remember shit rolls downhill.”
* * * *
Trisha O’Driscoll
I talked to the doctor when she did her rounds. She assured me that although the infection was still ravaging Colin’s body, his last chest x-ray showed a reduction of fluid in his lungs. Sleep is what you need, she urged. Then she looked at Jimmy and smiled.
“Your nephew?”
I smiled, thinking of the cliché that is in every movie with the philandering husband and his “niece.” She giggled, then placed her hand on mine.
“Trisha, escape, the ones who don’t make it through chronic illness are the ones who become consumed by it.”
“I’ve been walking the line of protecting myself from the pain by pulling away and wanting to never let him go.”
“You had two years more than most. Each laugh or word he spoke to you was a blessing. Have the counselors been helping?”
“Bracing me. Jimmy actually helps me more by getting me to a different place. It’s like being around him is naturally calming.”
“There are spirits like that in the world. Ones that exude peace. I’m glad you found one to be a friend.”
I held Colin’s hand then brushed some hair away from his face. Leaning down, I promised him I’d be back soon and that I love him more than anything.
Jimmy placed his hand around my waist as we walked to his car. I was amazed it was a classic muscle car.
“What’d ya expect? A broken-down Pinto?”
“Rice burner with only one hubcap actually.”
“Ouch.”
Getting in the car, I closed my eyes and lay against the headrest as I felt the car pull out and take on the curves of the parking ramp. Jimmy placed his hand on my knee and the calm returned as I passed out.
“Hey,
sleepy, the bed’s inside.” Jimmy’s voice woke me from my catnap and he led me to the elevators. “Can you believe they carded me?” he joked, and I tried to smile. “Are you hungry? I could order room service. It’s early enough.”
“That’s too expensive. A Mickey D’s run is good enough.”
“You need real food.”
It was then I woke up enough to realize I wasn’t going to some roadside no-tell motel. Jimmy had rented a room downtown. Sure it’s close to the hospital, but he shouldn’t have done that. The hotel was still part of a chain, but a nice chain.
“Wait, where are we?”
“Hilton. That’s okay, right?”
“More than okay. Jimmy, you can’t afford this.”
“So you’re my accountant. I’ve been looking for you,” he joked while leading me off the elevator and down the hall to a suite. “Do you think I should diversify more?”
“Seriously, Jimmy…” I stopped and pulled his arm back toward the elevator. “I can’t let you spend this kind of money.”
“What do you think; I’m spending my GI Bill on you and not college?”
“Stop joking.”
“Then stop insulting me. You have no idea what I make or how much I’m worth.”
“I have an idea. You aren’t the first soldier I’ve known.”
“And you’re not my first barmaid,” he snipped. “Now there is a nice warm shower and a comfy bed waiting for someone behind that door. Either way I’m spending the night. I’ve already switched my shift to be with you so could you stop treating me like a child when I’m dressed for once?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means the only time you treat me like a man is when I’m naked.”
“You want to be treated like a man?” I asked, snatching the card from his hand. “Take out the goddamn garbage and go buy me something pretty.”
Two could play at that childish game. The door beeped and the light turned green so I stormed into the room.
“You want to start shit with me, huh? Fine.” Jimmy grabbed me up and tossed me on the bed. He held my arms above my head. “I’m bigger, I’m stronger, and older than you think. I’ve been through more shit that proves I’m a man than anyone you’ve ever met, so don’t you dare question me again.”
“Stop, Jimmy, you’re hurting me.”
“You don’t know real pain.”
I started to get scared as I pushed harder and harder to get him off me only to have him return the favor. “Jimmy, please,” I pleaded as tears came down my face.
The pressure on my wrists instantly released and I could see the pain in Jimmy’s eyes. “Don’t cry. I’m sorry, baby.” He brushed away my tears and kissed me.
“Just get off me.”
He rolled on his back and looked at the ceiling. He then popped up, crossed the room, and grabbed the key.
“I’ll be back in a little bit. Order whatever you want from the menu.”
“Where are you going?”
“To buy you something pretty.”
What did I do? Maybe it’s better that we only sleep together; obviously we have nothing in common but our bodies. I stripped down and started the shower. As it warmed up I looked for toiletries since I left my bag at the hospital. I really wasn’t thinking when I left. Why did I leave? What if Colin…Nothing. He’s just there waiting for his immune system to finally kick in.
I showered and thought more about Jimmy. Maybe I should have told him about Colin. What could he have done anyway? I suppose I shouldn’t have questioned him about the room. I don’t know him really. Hell, I’m spending the night in his hotel room and I don’t even know him. Real smart, Trisha. What if deep down he’s abusive?
Chapter 9
PFC James Schmitt
I can’t believe I held her down against her will! What the hell was I thinking? I made a quick Wally World stop to get Trisha some PJ’s and thought about breaking into a jewelry store to get her something pretty, but I didn’t know how I could apologize for what I had done.
The shower was off, but I could feel the humidity in the air as I entered the hotel room. I knocked lightly on the bathroom door, but didn’t get a reply. Flopping on one of the king-size beds I grabbed the remote and started surfing.
“Jimmy, you out there?”
“Yeah.”
The door creaked as it opened and Trisha came out with just a towel wrapped around her chest. I instantly caught my breath and felt disgusted by myself at the same time. Jesus, her kid’s fighting for his life and all I can think about is whipping off that towel. Trish walked over to a loveseat while using her fingers as a comb.
“I forgot a brush.”
“May I?’’ I crossed to her and started running my fingers through her wet tangles. I made sure that I was being as gentle as I could. “I’m sorry about earlier. I’ve never been good about the whole man thing.”
“Tell me the truth, Jimmy. Have you ever hit a woman?” Her hair started to stiffen and freeze in between my fingers. Quickly I pulled them away and walked across the room.
“What the heck?” I could see the concern and fear in her eyes as her fingers replaced mine. “How did my hair get so cold?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? Can you turn up the heat, please?”
Cranking the heat up as high as I could, I turned back around. I knew I was going to freeze her if I told the truth. Crossing the room I stayed far away from her and curled into myself on the bed.
“I was in Korea,” I started, hoping that the voice was only in my head, but Trish turned toward me. “I killed a woman. She came into our camp carrying something. I tried to tell her to stop.” Trish had curled her legs underneath her, completely forgetting about her hair. “I knew a few words in Korean, but she kept walking forward. The look in her eye was frightening. I was so young.”
“You’re still young.”
“Not after that night. Growing up hurts when it comes all at once. I tried shooting a warning shot, but she kept walking.”
“Oh, Jimmy.”
“Don’t placate me.” I looked at her and laughed. “Yes, I know fifty cent words.” I paused before coming back around to the story. “I shot her through her chest. Right where she was cradling the baby she had just delivered.”
“Oh my God.” Trish’s hands covered her mouth and I knew that she had to be freezing because I felt like shit.
“I still remember using the muzzle of my rifle to pull back the cloth she was wrapped in.” Finally I lifted my eyes and locked on Trish’s. My voice dropped an octave. “Have I ever hit a woman? No. But I killed one. You want me to leave?”
She shivered and swallowed hard.
“No.” Her eyes looked pained. “I apologize for bringing it up. Not every soldier gets out unscarred and I know that.”
“I know I’m not your first soldier.”
“And I’m not your first barmaid.”
Silently we sat until I could hear the watch on my wrist tick.
“We don’t know each other very well, do we?” Breaking the silence, I stretched.
“Guess not.”
“I want to…know you.”
“I’d like that too.”
“Oh, sorry. I got you pajamas.” I got up and passed her the plastic bag.
“Thanks?” She looked really confused.
“Is there something wrong?”
“No, I’m surprised you got flannels. I thought you’d get me something…”
“Silky and small.”
“Yeah.”
“Now you know something else about me.”
“You like me covered up.”
“I’m respectful enough to cover you up so I don’t ravage you in your sleep.”
“That’s a theory.” she smiled. “What’s this?” She held a small mirror I bought.
“When I looked in it, it wasn’t very pretty, but I think…” I
walked over and held it up behind her so I could clearly see her face. “Ahhh, that’s better. Now I bought you something pretty.”
“Funny.”
“Beautiful,” I corrected as I kissed her neck. “You better put on the pajamas.”
“I don’t want to wear pajamas. I’d rather wear your shirt.”
“Why?”
“Because you’d have to take it off.”
“Am I going to have to dance while I take it off?”
“You do know how to distract a girl.”
“You’re a woman,” I corrected as I walked in front of her. I pulled her up and held her close to me. “You know I’d give you the shirt off my back, but you don’t seem to be in need of clothing.”
“I don’t, huh?” She smiled and undid the tuck in her towel, making it drop into a puddle at her feet. “I think I need something.”
“Now why did you have to go and do that? You know what you do to me.”
“Tell me.”
I let my lips touch hers and I was done. Like every time my hand went up her back until I could cradle her head in my hands, I couldn’t let her go. God help me I want her so badly it hurt. I’ve never understood it until this moment. The way that KK looks at Nye is the way I kiss Trish. I kiss her like she’s the most wonderful person in the world. Every ounce of my soul wants to keep the connection between us at all costs.
Pulling back, I looked in her midnight blue eyes and I saw more. For the first time in a year and a half I allowed myself to feel it.
“I love you, Trish.”
She stepped back, grabbed up her towel, and ran to the bathroom.
* * * *
Trisha O’Driscoll
That wasn’t a caught up in ecstasy moment. Sure the kiss was great, but that. That was real. Too real. I just ran out on a man for telling me he loved me. What the hell is the matter with me? He’s supposed to be my escape, but he took me way too far. That’s not what I wanted.
Yes, it is. I turned to the door and held on the door handle. He’s left. James isn’t one to open up and when he does I throw it back in his face.
“Did you mean it?” I asked through the door, thinking I’d get no response.
“Did you?”
“I…I…I don’t know. It’s kind of a weird time for me.”
Redemption of Blood Page 12
