by Stacey Lynn
I didn’t know if she was sleeping or pretending, but I didn’t stop to check as I grabbed my boxers and jeans, slid them on, and headed out to the living room.
It didn’t matter that it was the middle of night. I needed a drink, and I knew Johnny would still be awake.
“Hey, asshole,” I muttered when I reached the living room and saw him lying on the couch. His feet, still clad in boots because he slept fully dressed for whoever the fuck knew why, draped over the edge of the small furniture.
“Can’t you two be quieter when you’re going at it?” He threw his feet off the couch and sat up, grinning at me.
“Nope.”
I reached for the whiskey and two glasses, pouring both of us a shot.
He opened his mouth to speak, but I stopped him.
“Just drink and shut up.”
He tossed back his drink and smiled. “I like her.”
“You like anything with a pussy.” Although the fact that he even saw Meg in that way made my chest burn. It wasn’t from the alcohol. Shit. Was Meg right? Was I jealous?
I shook the thought out of my head.
“Not true,” Johnny said with a crooked grin. “They have to be blond and have big tits, too.”
I rolled my eyes. He was still such a kid.
We took a few more shots in silence before I asked for an update. “You hear anything today from Daemon or Ryker?”
“Nah, man. I know Ryker’s thinking of heading south to find the asshole himself, though. He’s ready to gun down anyone who might know something.”
Fuck.
My hands smacked the puke-colored counter. “I’m going fuckin’ crazy locked up on this land. We need to figure this shit out, and soon.”
Johnny threw back another shot. “We could draw him out.”
“How do you mean?”
He shrugged. “I brought her phone in case she needed it. GPS is off and shit, but if she had to make a call…somewhere in town, you know the asshole would see it.”
I leaned forward, my chest tightened at the thought. “You want to fucking use Meg as bait?”
“Quickest way to get this shit done with.”
“No,” I snapped. But damn it if he didn’t have a point. If Moscoe had been hidden for weeks, it could take even longer for us to drag him out. Even Xbox hadn’t gotten wind of him. But God…the thought of throwing her into the fire had my skin crawling.
I shook my arms to erase the feeling, but it didn’t help. It just tightened everything until it hurt to breathe.
“We’ll find another way,” I told him.
Johnny took a step back and smiled. “We can do that…it’ll take longer. But maybe you’re liking playing house with the bombshell and her kid.”
“Fuck off unless you want my fist in your face.”
He tossed his hands to the side and took another step back, out of my reach so I couldn’t strangle him. “I’m just sayin’ it looks to me like you don’t mind the daddy role so much.”
I growled at him, slammed another shot. Daddy.
I never wanted to be in that damn role. Not again.
My brief stint at it was painful enough.
But even knowing that, the pain still wasn’t enough to keep me away from Meg. Even from the kitchen, my body still ached to be next to her, holding her in my arms for some damn unknown reason I couldn’t explain and no longer wanted to fight.
I just wanted her—for as long as she’d have me.
When I crawled back into bed, Meg was still on her side, her cheek resting on her hands. I adjusted her so my arm was around her back and her head was on my shoulder.
“Finn?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep. Her eyelids fluttered but didn’t open.
“Yeah, darlin’, I’m here.”
“Mm. Tonight was fun.”
I snorted, ran a hand through her hair, and pressed my lips to her forehead. Tonight hadn’t been fun. It was phenomenal.
It lit on fire all my fears about getting close to someone again. I just hoped Meg and Brayden didn’t get burned in the wreckage once she finally realized what a fuck-up I was.
* * *
Sweat poured down my back from the sun beating down on me. The sun was shining bright, not a cloud in the sky, and I could hear Brayden’s laughter and squeals from the dock as he and Johnny spent the afternoon fishing.
Meg had still been sleeping when I woke up this morning only to hear Johnny snoring on the couch.
As soon as the sun had risen, I’d headed outside—where I spent most of the day working in the yard, and once it got late enough I started tearing down gutters. I’d bought the new pieces a couple of days before, and since there wasn’t rain in the extended forecast, it was a good day to put them up.
The slamming of the screen door caught my attention from my perch on the ladder and I looked down to see Meg coming outside.
Damn. She was wearing short, tight black shorts and an even tighter tank top that showed off every curve of her body. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail. She looked so innocent.
So young. So clean.
So completely opposite of me.
My chest thumped a little bit harder as she walked toward me, sunglasses over her eyes. I hated that I couldn’t see what she was thinking—she showed her every thought in her light blue eyes.
“Hey,” she said, one hand propped on her hip. “We need to go to the store. Do you want to take me or do you want Johnny to?”
I didn’t want Johnny anywhere near her—especially on the back of his bike. I pictured Meg’s arms around his waist, her bare thighs rubbing against his…
Then I realized what she’d asked.
Fuck, I was messed up in the head.
I dug in my back pocket and tossed her my keys. She grabbed them at the last second. “Johnny can take you. Take the truck.”
“Obviously,” she muttered, her lips twisting up at one end. Her bottom lip disappeared into her teeth and I almost growled at the sight. God. She was so sexy when she was thinking. “Are you avoiding me today?”
“What?”
“It’s just…” She shifted on her feet and suddenly I saw how nervous she was. “You’ve been outside all day.”
Ah, hell. I knew why she’d think that. Every other time I’d gotten close to her, I’d pushed her away. Maybe I should have been doing that today, too, but the push and pull had exhausted me.
I looked at the roof, tapped the edge of the gutter I was removing. “Wasn’t trying to, but work needs to be done around here.”
I didn’t think it was what she was looking for.
Silence stretched between us as I went back to unhooking the rusted metal, and I finally heard her huff and walk away.
Her loud voice echoed in the air as she called for Johnny and Brayden to get ready to go.
“You can leave the kid,” I told her when she headed back toward the house.
“Thanks,” she snapped. “But I’ll take my kid with me. Wouldn’t want you to have to give a shit about someone.”
The door slammed and my head jerked back.
Something cold squeezed my chest and slid down my spine.
I squeezed my eyes closed and climbed down the ladder.
“Sounds like you royally fucked that up.”
I glared at Johnny and his smug grin. “Shut the hell up.”
“I’m just sayin’,” he said, rocking back onto his heels. “She might need someone to comfort her.”
My blood pulsed in my ears at the thought. In a second, I had my hand around Johnny’s scrawny neck and his back was to the wall of the house.
His smile was gone, but his hands were limp at his sides and he flashed me a wink.
“Don’t even fuckin’ think about it,” I hissed, spittle from my mouth flying onto his.
The little shit just laughed at me. “Down, boy. Just wanted to see how much you really liked her.”
“I don’t.” I did. Why was I so quick to deny it?
“Sure you
don’t.”
Fuck. I shoved him into the wall and let go. His hands went to his throat and he rubbed where I’d had him gripped.
“You’re a dumbass, Johnny.”
His lips twitched and he shrugged down his shirt. “Smarter than I look, actually. I just think it’s strange that I’ve been around the club for three years now and I’ve never seen you so worked up over some pussy—”
His hands flew up at my glare. “All right, all right, not pussy…I’ve never seen you so worked up over a respectable, kind lady. That better?”
I shook my head. “Just take her to the damn store and make sure you don’t get killed.”
“Aw.” He walked by me and slapped my shoulder. “It’s so nice to know you care.”
I grunted and followed him inside.
Meg could go to the store, but Brayden was staying with me. Without knowing where Moscoe was, it was smarter for him to be here than having Johnny keep eyes on both of them.
And there they went—my protective instincts when it came to Meg and Brayden, flying to the front even when I tried to push them away.
“Brayden will stay with me,” I told Meg when she caught sight of us entering the cabin. Not that we were quiet, stomping mud and dirt off our boots in the entryway.
Her eyes flashed something I didn’t understand and she looked at Brayden drawing on blank paper. “I want him with me.”
The undertone in her voice said she didn’t trust him with me.
My lip curled and I took a step toward her. She was probably right, but annoyance still rolled through me. “Can’t have both of you gone, not a good idea.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You said we were safe here.”
“You are, but it’s still better if you’re not in public together without knowing what’s going on.”
She looked at Johnny. With a smile, he simply nodded his agreement. Like he’d disagree with me in front of her. I almost laughed.
Johnny knew I could kick his ass twice before he ever got a hit on me. The move outside was kid’s play compared to what I could do to someone his size.
I inhaled a breath so deep my lungs burned. Nodding toward Johnny, I sent him a silent sign to go outside and then I walked up to Meg.
My hand curled around the back of her neck and I waited until I had her full attention. It didn’t take long and my chest heated again when I saw her pulse flutter in her neck. “I wasn’t trying to piss you off,” I said when she finally met my gaze. Her blue eyes grew lighter and I dropped my forehead to hers. “Wasn’t trying to avoid you, didn’t try to make you mad outside, either. Maybe I’m just not good with all this caring bullshit.”
A burst of her breath hit my throat. My dick hardened, loving the feel of her against me.
“That was…nice?”
My fingers twisted on her neck and I smiled. “Haven’t given a shit about anyone in a long time, Meg, and I’m still positive that I’m not the kind of guy you should be with, but I’m trying to tell you I’m done fighting it…and I’m trying here. Just give me an allowance for being a dick-hole once in a while.”
“All right. You can be a dick-hole once in a while.”
I pulled back and caught her grin. Then my lips pressed against hers. I couldn’t help it. I had to be touching her, tasting her. Plus, she was pretty when she smiled, but prettier when she was flushed and breathless after kissing me.
Meg had turned into a quickly growing addiction that I was done ignoring.
Reminding myself that Brayden was in the room, probably watching some guy manhandle his mom, I ended the kiss well before my dick wanted to. He wanted more, based on the way he was trying to dive through my zipper.
“Go to the store. I’ll keep Brayden, and you two be safe.”
Her eyes flickered to Brayden. His eyes quickly darted from us back to his paper. Yeah…he’d been watching.
“Fine,” she whispered through a smile with slightly swollen lips.
I brushed my thumb against them, not wanting her to leave yet. The bedroom sounded like a fantastic place to keep her for the rest of the day.
She stepped away and threw her purse over her shoulder. “We’ll be back later. Try not to ignore him the whole time.”
“We’ll be fine,” I said and looked at Brayden. His blond hair flopped over his face so it was hidden while he colored. That odd ache stirred inside my chest again looking at the little boy. “Won’t we, Brayden?”
His head snapped up and his eyes met mine. Blue eyes so much like his mom’s. Then he shrugged. “Can we fish?”
“Sure.”
“Can I swim?”
“No,” Meg said, stepping in. “You don’t have a lifejacket and the water’s too cold.”
“Can you get me Milk Duds, Mom?”
Meg smiled at her son and her eyes softened in a way they only did when she thought her son was being cute.
God, I couldn’t help it. One soft glance and I wanted to pull her into the room and have those beautiful blues on me.
“Sure, kiddo.” She went to him, leaned down, and brushed her lips across his cheek.
He grimaced and pushed her away, but his lips turned upward when she was walking away from him.
I envied them, I realized, standing there watching a sweet mom show her kid some love. I had never had that, even before foster care, and there was something so damn relaxing about watching the two of them.
“See you later.” She waved a hand goodbye to me, but didn’t look.
I missed those blue eyes of hers, her easy smile directed at me, and her lips brushing against mine before she was even fully out the door.
19 Meg
I looked down at the overflowing cart as Johnny and I headed out to the truck. “Think we have enough food now?”
Johnny shrugged. “For a few days at least.”
The food in the cart would feed me and Brayden for a month.
I laughed softly. He was easy to be around. Joked a lot and didn’t seem to take much seriously. A part of me wondered if he was really the best guy to serve as backup in case anything happened, but I figured if Ryker and Finn trusted him with me, he couldn’t be that bad.
Once we loaded up the groceries and closed the tailgate, I looked down Main Street of the town where we were. I still hadn’t been able to browse through the antique stores that lined the streets, and since it was a weekend, people seemed to be filling the sidewalks, leisurely strolling in and out of the shops.
“Hey,” I said, turning to Johnny.
One of his hands rested on the top of the tailgate. He looked casual, like he didn’t have a care in the world.
“Would you want to go shopping with me?”
His lips twisted like Brayden’s when I asked him to eat lima beans. The kid hated them.
“Not really.”
I grinned. “Would you do it anyway? I won’t be long, I just want to see what they have.”
I pointed down the street to the first shop and Johnny’s easy smile disappeared. “Where do you want to go?”
“Those shops.”
His brows pinched together. “Those? As in all of them?”
“Um…maybe?”
He laughed, pushed off the truck, and took a couple steps toward me. “Would it make you happy to torture me?”
“I just want to shop.” I clasped my hands together and pouted. “Please? Just for a little bit.”
He huffed, pulled out his phone and checked the time, then slid the phone back into his jeans pocket. “Fine. Thirty minutes, I want to talk to you about something anyway.”
It didn’t sound good. In fact, by the drop in Johnny’s tone of voice, he sounded downright ominous.
I shifted on my feet. “It doesn’t sound like something that’s going to make me happy.”
He gestured for me to start walking.
“Probably won’t make you happy, but you might consider it. I think I have a way to get rid of Moscoe, but Finn got pissed when I brought it up.”
�
�Everything pisses Finn off,” I muttered and looked away.
I caught our reflection in the window of an old-time barber shop. Johnny walked next to me, closest to other people and oncoming cars like it was ingrained in him to protect women. It made me smile, despite my slow-growing nerves.
Johnny chuckled. I liked the sound of his friendly laugh. It seemed so contradictory to the men in the club I was used to being around. They were all so intense. Johnny was just…easy.
“Nothing makes Finn mad,” Johnny said.
I stared at him with shocked eyes and almost tripped over a crack in the cement. His hand reached out and grabbed onto my elbow, keeping me on my feet.
“Swear to you, the guy is the most chilled-out guy I’ve ever met. But seeing him around you…all pissed and angry…and something else.” He looked down at me and wiggled his eyebrows teasingly. “I’ve never seen him all worked up. It’s funny actually.”
I grimaced. “So glad I can bring out the best in him.”
“Nah,” Johnny said and ushered me into the first shop. “I think it’s a good thing. You’re good for him.”
My eyes roamed the store and I took in vintage metal signs, old and broken end tables. This wasn’t an antique store…it was a crap store. “I’m not anything to him,” I muttered and turned on my heel. This wasn’t the store I wanted.
Despite what he had just said an hour ago, I wasn’t a complete fool. Someday Finn would walk away, and Brayden and I would be on our own. And I figured since I no longer had a home, or any possessions, that maybe these stores could have some small furniture to help me rebuild—for whenever I got to wherever I was going.
Thirty minutes later, I’d wandered through two more shops, Johnny next to me. He didn’t complain much, but made the occasional joke at all the “eclectic” merchandise we came across. Like a naked Betty Boop cookie jar that had “Come take a bite of my chips” painted across the front.
“We can go,” I said, my shoulders slumped. I loved finding deals, but there didn’t seem to be much in these shops that had much value.
Most of the furniture I found that I had liked would have needed to be stripped and re-stained or painted. Some needed new legs. I enjoyed taking on do-it-yourself projects, but since I was going to be refurnishing an entire house, what I was finding would take too much time and effort.
