Evelyn’s legs trembled and she felt that they would soon give way. The saloon owner was propositioning her in the middle of the afternoon in a public place and suggesting that she was no better than one of his whores. But she was no courtesan! No whore to be passed from one man to another.
Swearengen leered at her evident distress then leaned closer. “What say you, Mrs Campbell?”
“What’s going on here?” Nate strode across the porch and Evelyn staggered towards him, grasping at his proffered arm while the older man turned to greet him.
“Well, good afternoon to ya, Mr Hamilton. I was just introducing myself to Mrs Campbell here.”
“Well you’ve done that, so what else do you want?”
Evelyn noted that Nate’s eyes were hard and black as he looked at the other man. She leaned against his arm, her fragility making her dismissive of propriety.
Swearengen held up his hands. “Nothing. Not a thing. I’ll be on my merry way.” He tipped his hat to Evelyn, then to Nate. “Have a pleasant afternoon the pair of ya!” He winked before turning and skipping off the step.
Evelyn’s heart sank. It was clear that Swearengen knew about the deal she’d made with Nate. Her reputation would be destroyed in Deadwood, and she’d never be able to rebuild it, plus it wasn’t fair on Aaron. What if the other children found out? Her son would be humiliated.
“Let’s walk a while.” Nate tucked her arm into the crook of his and held it there.
“Yes, Mr Hamilton.” She opened her parasol and allowed him to guide her off the step and into the dusty street. He steered her past horse dung and rotting vegetables and they walked in silence through the afternoon heat.
“What do you think of Deadwood, Mrs Campbell?” Nate gestured at their surroundings.
“I think that the settlers here have done a fine job of creating a town,” she replied as she looked up at the north hill which had been carved into avenues and lined with attractive cottages. Anyone could see that the settlers here had spent time and effort making the camp into a more permanent construction.
“It’s still a little rough around the edges.”
Evelyn nodded. “Just like many other towns but folks seem keen to continue to improve things.”
“We’ve a bank and a variety of different shops, a sheriff and a mayor! Deadwood is on the up, Mrs Campbell, I’m telling you.” He smiled as he looked around him. “I saw this place when it was little more than a dusty track with a spattering of tents and now it’s almost as good as any established town.”
“It is, I can see that.” She grinned, caught up with his enthusiasm.
“And would you like to settle here?” He stopped and turned to look at her.
She scuffed the toe of her boot against the dirt floor and sighed.
“I do not think so.”
He reached out and lifted her chin with his forefinger.
“Why not, Evelyn?” If she hadn’t known how angry he was, she would have thought that he looked hurt, maybe even concerned.
“I couldn’t, Mr Hamilton. My reputation will be destroyed now.”
“You think this because of Swearengen?”
She shook her head. “Not just him. People know what’s going on. They have eyes and ears and will be keen to gossip about me, what with me being a newcomer and all.”
“And your reputation is of great importance.” He lowered his hand.
“Mr Hamilton”—she looked into his eyes—“in a town such as this a woman’s reputation is all she has.”
He nodded.
“And I have Aaron to think about.”
“Of course you do. And that is why I have another offer for you.”
Sweat pooled between her breasts and her armpits were warm and damp. She had not yet earned the wages that he’d given her up front to pay her hotel bills and she really didn’t want to get any deeper in debt to him. She had nothing else to give to him other than what he’d already asked for.
“Look, Evelyn…” He licked his lips and adjusted his hat. Evelyn fought a smile as he took it off and held it in front of him, then sighed and put it back on.
“What is it?”
“How about if we get married?”
“What?” Her heart leapt and she placed a hand upon his chest to steady herself.
“Well it’s the perfect solution, isn’t it?”
She stared into his eyes but she could no longer read him.
“Do you love me, Nate?”
He looked away, appearing fascinated by a drunk staggering along the street. She waited, her hand still resting on his chest. She could feel his heat even through her gloves and her body responded to it, the old familiar flame of desire flickered between her legs.
He turned back to her.
“After everything that’s happened, Evelyn, does that really matter?”
She pulled her hand away.
“Yes, Nate, yes it does.”
“Well love wasn’t enough for you before, so why should it matter now!” His eyes were black, his cheeks flushed.
“Oh, Nate, but it was. You just don’t understand.”
“I understand well enough that you and the boy need a home. You’ve no way of supporting the two of you and nowhere to go. I’ve money, a fine house and I can offer you both a decent standard of living. That”—he raised his eyebrows—“should be enough.”
“I’ve tried that before Nate and it doesn’t work.”
“Whadda ya mean?”
“I…”
This was all so difficult and too complicated to explain. If she told him that she hadn’t loved her husband then she’d have to tell him why she’d married him and explain about Aaron and he’d be…oh so furious with her and she didn’t think that she could cope with even more of his anger. She yearned to see him happy and carefree as he had been in the past, an ardent lover full of passion for life, passion for the future and passion for her. The anger and bitterness that ruled him now drowned out the man she’d known and she wanted to see him burst to the surface, gasping for breath and eager to grab life by the reins again.
The heat was oppressive and she felt lightheaded. Everything seemed so far away and it was as if she were detached from it all—the wooden buildings all around her, the parasol in her hand, the earthy smell of the horses stabled nearby and Nate’s voice which was being drowned out by that terrible ringing…
* * * *
“Evelyn?”
He shook her.
“God damn it, Evelyn, wake up!” He ran a hand through his damp hair and shrugged off his jacket. His shirt clung to his back.
At least it was cooler inside the house that he’d built in the shadow of the north hill.
“Where am I?” She tried to sit up, but he pushed her back against the cushion then smoothed her hair from her forehead and patted it with the cold damp cloth.
“You’re in my house.”
“Why? What happened?”
“You fainted in the middle of the street, Evelyn.”
She moved to sit up again, but he forced her back down.
“Lie there and rest.”
She reached down and her eyes widened as she realised that he’d removed her dress.
“It’s okay,” he whispered, dipping the cloth into the bowl of cold water, “I removed it so as I could loosen your corset. Damn thing was cutting into you.”
“Thank you.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“I’m sorry if…I put pressure on you, Evelyn. I didn’t mean to upset you like that.”
As he patted the cloth over her forehead again, she reached out and placed a trembling hand over his.
“I’m the one who should be saying sorry, Nate.”
He shook his head.
“It just seemed like the right thing to do. You and Aaron badly need somewhere to live and I have a place.”
“And it looks wonderful.” She gestured at the large lounge with its wooden beams, rag rug on the floor and open hearth. “You built all of
this?”
He shrugged and gave a wry smile. “Every timber I sawed, every nail I hammered, I thought of you and how you would want it to be. Even though you were already married to another man.”
Her eyes filled with tears.
“I know that I can never make it up to you and I wish so desperately that I could.” Her voice cracked.
“Hush now.” He ran a hand up and down her bare arm, his fingers tingling as he caressed her warm skin from her wrist to shoulder. She was so beautiful. “You need to rest.”
“But I don’t want to rest, Nate. I waited for so long hoping to see you. I don’t want to waste a single minute of our time together.”
“Neither do I.” He submitted to his love for her, the desire that was battling his festering anger towards her. “But I just don’t know if we can make this right.”
“Look at me, Nate.”
He stared deep into her eyes and saw the twenty-one-year-old Evelyn, the girl she’d been before he’d left. She’d been so innocent, yet so passionate, so sweet, yet so strong. He had loved her with everything he’d had to give but when she’d betrayed him he’d been broken.
“Underneath it all, I’m still the same woman you loved then. Other things have changed but I’m still the same person in here.” She pounded her fist upon her chest. “I still love you, Nate. I never stopped loving you.”
He cupped her chin and caressed it with his calloused thumb.
“I never stopped loving you either but I’ve been so angry with you, Evelyn. Those first few months away from you, I worked so hard to find gold and then when I struck lucky I couldn’t wait to get back to tell you. I was proud as a cockerel, strutting around telling all the other fellers I’d make my fortune and offer my woman everything she could possibly desire.”
“If only I’d known…”
“I staked my claim then wrote to you. I was afraid to leave in case someone else tried to steal it. There were a lot of desperate men combing the Black Hills for gold and the Laramie treaty did nothing to stop them.”
“Custer’s gold rush,” she whispered.
He nodded. “I knew I’d get a buyer and as soon as I did and it was all done and dusted, I hurried back to you. I had a nugget of gold safe in my pocket ready to give you so as we could make it into a ring and we’d be able to tell our grandchildren that your wedding band was carved from the gold I’d claimed especially for you. What a story that would’ve been.” His eyes misted over as he remembered the dream he’d once had.
“That was a beautiful idea,” she whispered, squeezing his arm. “I just wish I’d received your letter in time.”
“Do you think that your folks took it and didn’t tell you?” he frowned.
“Maybe”—she shrugged—“or maybe it arrived after I’d gone and they didn’t see the point in upsetting me.”
“When I came back, I went straight to your daddy’s ranch…” He hung his head.
“But I was gone.”
“It broke my heart in two, Evelyn. I’d been so sure of us and so sure of you. I never suspected for a moment that you’d even consider marrying someone else.”
“Neither did I. It wasn’t what I really wanted, Nate.”
“Then why’d you do it?” he asked, still holding her chin. He watched as her lower lip trembled and she tried to form the words of an explanation but before she could, he covered her mouth with his own and surrendered to the ache in his heart that begged him to hold her, to taste her and to indulge in the joy of loving her once more.
When he stopped for a moment and pulled back to look at her, a tiny sigh escaped her and she leaned towards him, curling her arm around his neck.
“Do you really love me, Evelyn?”
She nodded, her eyes heavy with desire, her lips red and open, ready for another kiss.
“Do you want to be with me again, like before?” His cheeks flushed as he asked the question and he mused for a moment at his own bashfulness. He realised at that moment that he wanted her to want him too. He wanted her to long for him as he had longed for her and he needed her to love him.
“More than anything, Nate.” She placed a hand over heart in a gesture of sincerity.
Nate stood, leaned over and scooped the woman he loved into his arms then carried her upstairs to the bedroom he’d designed with her in mind and laid her down on the bed he’d carved with her image held deep in his heart.
* * * *
Evelyn lay on the cool cotton coverlet and watched as Nate drew the curtains, shutting out the noisy Deadwood afternoon. In the semi-darkness it was easy to imagine that they were the only two people in the world. A part of her mind flickered towards Aaron but she knew that he was safe back in the hotel kitchen with the matronly cook, probably learning how to bake delicious pastries or how to skin a rabbit in one go.
When Nate turned back to look at her, her stomach flipped with desire and anticipation. There was raw longing in his eyes. Though they had made love many times before, she felt as if this would be the first time that they came together as adults. They were different people now—no longer innocents in their early twenties, believing that life would grant them both the happiness and ease of passage that the young think they’re entitled to.
They knew differently.
But as he removed his shirt and she stared at his hard male body, she felt that perhaps this was better. Having suffered the pain of separation, she now wanted him on more than just one level. And he was no longer a boy, he was a grown man, made harder and leaner by his time outdoors and by his life experiences. His chest muscles were firm and covered by a light film of dark hair.. His stomach was toned and flat, the ridges beneath the skin emphasised as he breathed in and out. The hair that began just below his collar bones ran down over his navel in a narrow line and disappeared beneath his trousers. She peered lower and moaned inwardly at the significant bulge at his groin.
He sat on the edge of the bed to remove his boots and she reached out to caress his back. The skin was warm and smooth, his shoulders strong and broad. Her belly tightened and her womb contracted with excitement. She moved over to him and wrapped her arms around him, placed her head upon his shoulder.
He let her hold him like that, his large hand covering hers over his heart, then he turned in her arms.
“Let me see you, Evelyn. I want to look at you.”
“Yes,” she whispered, and he helped her to her feet.
He removed her already loosened corset, threw it to the floor then ran his hands over the outline of her breasts beneath the transparent material. She wriggled with pleasure at his touch and he lifted the weight of her breasts in his hands, cradling them whilst rubbing his thumbs over her erect nipples. She almost cried out when he stopped.
“Let’s get this off.” He pulled up her chemise and slid down her bloomers.
“You are still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” He eyed her body eagerly as if keen to see every part of her at once.
She stood before him, fighting the urge to cross her arms over her nudity. It felt so strange to stand thus before a man, totally exposed and vulnerable, yet she also found it totally arousing. He leant forward so that his mouth was almost touching her belly then he blew very gently on her skin, moving his head up and down so that his warm breath tickled her from between her breasts to just below her navel. The sensation was exquisite but it made her yearn for a firmer touch and she moved closer to him.
She gasped when he reached out to her and ran his cool finger tips over her collar bones, her shoulders and down her arms to her fingers. But he stared unerringly at the full mounds of her breasts and she shuddered with delight when he took first one nipple then the other into his warm mouth and sucked greedily on them, rolling his hot tongue over the hard buds until her loins were on fire. His sucking pulled at the invisible link that led down to her womb and her pussy contracted, eager to be filled.
“Nate…that feels so good!” She arched her back and he pulled her towards him a
nd lifted her onto his lap, wrapping her legs around his waist. His rock hard erection pressed against her sensitive silken folds, only the cloth of his trousers between them and she rubbed against it, allowing the tip to push against her opening. She felt her juices trickling from her, lubricating his trousers as she tried to ease him into her.
She kissed him, pushing her mouth hard against his and sucking on his tongue. He tasted so good, so familiar, yet so new.
“You possess my mind, Evelyn,” he murmured, as he moved his mouth down again to her breasts. “I can’t get enough of you. I want to kiss every part of you.”
“I’m not complaining, Nate!”
He kissed her hard then rolled her over onto her back and stood at the side of the bed.
“What is it, Nate?” She was startled by his solemn expression and she pulled her knees together, suddenly aware that they’d been wide open displaying her inner parts.
“I wasn’t going to allow this. I wasn’t going to fall for you again.”
“I didn’t expect you to, Nate. But there is still something between us. It never went away.”
He shook his head. “You’re right. I know that I should fight this but then I wonder why. I would gain nothing by closing my heart to you.”
So he still loved her. Still wanted her. In all of her wildest dreams she hadn’t imagined she’d be so lucky. All the old desire and longing welled up inside her and she knew that she had to have him. She let her legs fall open again and her pussy tingled as he perused her most private place.
“Take off your pants.”
He unbuttoned them and let them fall to the floor and Evelyn groaned. His erection bounced free and she reached for it, gripping the steel hard shaft covered with its silky skin. She pulled him towards her, leading him by the cock, rubbing her thumb over the bead of moisture at the swollen tip.
He lowered himself over her and she opened her legs, eager to take him inside her but he shook his head.
“Not yet, my love.”
“But Nate…oh, Nate,” she sighed as he planted tiny kisses all the way down her body and over her hips before settling his mouth between her legs.
Desire in Deadwood Page 4
