by Ari Rhoge
“I still think you need therapy, by the way,” Charlie advised, grinning as he peeked out of the entrance to the kitchen. Georgiana was seated in the living room between the Bennet twins, Elizabeth purposely mussing her hair and Jane good-humoredly scolding her sister. God, she had a pretty smile. He frowned and pulled back.
“I think we've had this conversation two dozen times.”
“It doesn't mean that you don't need therapy,” Charlie said, smirking.
Indeed, they had talked about this a lot, numerous times since Will's father had passed away. The stress and unhappiness, the sheer force of responsibility and the unwanted career were getting to him. At least his best friend would only have to endure it for a few more months, if all went accordingly.
But Will Darcy was eager to change the subject.
“By the way, can you please tell Carolyn to stop calling me? It's getting kind of embarrassing. I have really inappropriate voicemails on my Blackberry. —— I think they'd make your blood run cold.”
“Please don't share,” Charlie shuddered, thinking of his older sister. “It's your fault for getting pissed drunk at the Christmas party last year and leading her on.”
“All I said was that her dress looked pretty,” Will stated, incredulous.
“If you look that up in Carolyn's dictionary, I'm quite certain it translates into "I would so love to shag you senseless right now" — figuratively speaking.”
“I'm going to go spend the remainder of this cab ride pretending you never said that,” he said, pausing. “I'll see you when I see you.”
“Agreed.”
• • •
Charlie finally hobbled back into the room, balancing a variety of Coke cans, which Jane graciously decided to help him with. He thanked her and smiled warmly, and I caught the tinge of a blush at her cheeks again. As she caught my eye, she cleared her throat and sunk onto the love seat beside us. I would give her such shit about this on the ride home — and she knew it.
“What took you so long?” Georgiana asked, eyebrow raised in question.
But Charlie was as elusive as ever, stretching back casually. “Oh, just a phone call.”
“From?” she prompted.
“A telemarketer.”
“You spent 15 minutes on the phone with a telemarketer?” Georgiana asked, doubtfully, snapping open her Coke can. She propped her striped socked feet up upon the rim of the coffee table casually, leaning back.
“Of course,” Charlie said, sincerely, glancing over to Jane for a moment. “They're fantastic conversation starters. We were actually just brainstorming on eco-friendly ideas for easy, environmentally safe living. He suggested that I buy a Prius.”
“You have a Prius,” I told him, and he glanced over, surprised. “It's parked along the rotunda for whatever reason — CBING2.”
“You are unfathomably observant, Lizzy Bennet.”
“That's true,” Jane said, smiling wisely, and tracing the rim of her can with an index finger.
“So, this twin thing…” Charlie leaned forward on his elbows, distinctly speaking to Jane. “What's it like?”
Jane glanced up, looked at me, then looked back to him with some hesitation. “Well, it's great, of course. I mean, we don't share the same brainwaves or anything, but I wouldn't be able to live without her.” She paused for a second. “Do you have any siblings?”
“Two older sisters,” Charlie said, wincing. I sensed some apprehension. “Lyssa is back in England. Carolyn lives about an hour away.”
“I don't sense much affection,” I said, grinning.
“No, that's not it,” Charlie said, chuckling. “They're family — you have no choice but to love them.”
“I hear that,” I muttered, and Jane nudged me quickly across Georgiana's lap. “What? —— No, I love you all, Jane, really. Marin's definitely in the top ballot too. But those twins are at the end of the spectrum,” I grumbled, leaning my head back.
“What, two sets of twins in your family?” Charlie asked, bewildered. “Five children?”
“She just pop-pop-popped 'em out.”
“Lizzy!”
“Your poor parents,” Charlie murmured.
“Our poor mother,” Jane said, laughing quietly, pulling the sleeves of her shirt over her hands and hugging her arms. “Our Dad handles things a little more rationally, usually by escaping to the den when things get too intense.”
“You can't blame him, though,” I shrugged. “He lives with a hysterical wife, a mellowed-out introvert, and the most obnoxious 16-year-old identical twins you will ever meet.”
“Lizzy,” Jane said, smiling, pulling her knees to her chest. “You make our family sound like a horror story.”
“No, actually, it all sounds quite interesting,” Charlie said, considering. “A demented Brady Bunch of sorts.” He then cocked his head at Jane, and asked her if she would like to borrow a sweatshirt. “I've got a problem with the AC — If I would've known you were cold, I would've offered to fetch you a jacket, or blanket, or something.”
“I'm fine,” Jane insisted, smiling.
“You're shivering,” Charlie grinned, eyebrows raised. “Please, let me.” And with that, he rose and disappeared into his bedroom.
“Aw, he's so fetching,” I said, smirking at Jane, raising my eyebrows.
Jane rolled her eyes and fought another blush, and I couldn't help but snort.
“Y'know,” thought Georgy, aloud. “I never knew you both had such a complicated family —— imagine more Bennets running around.”
“It's a scary thought,” I said, sympathizing, then turning to Jane. “Say, I don't think I've seen you blush over a guy since high school.”
Jane grumbled. “I did not blush. It's not what you think.”
“It's exactly what I think.”
“I guess you do have matching brainwaves, then?” Georgy smirked, and I grinned at her.
“When are you going to ask Charlie about your brother, Georgy?” I asked her, adjusting myself so I could sit on my heels. “That's why we're here, isn't it? To gently pry him off your back?” I grinned at Jane, who slumped in relief of the abandoned subject.
“I'll say something soon.” Georgy sighed, some of her dark bangs falling into her eyes. “I've got to get on that.” After a second she turned to me, brilliant blue eyes skeptical. “What, no GDarce?”
“Sorry?”
“You just called me Georgy.”
“Oh.” I grimaced, snapping my fingers. “It's all Charlie's fault. He's got the accent going for him so it sounds all lilting and smooth — Jor-jay.”
“What did I do?” Charlie asked, evasively, re-entering the room with a dark-gray college sweatshirt in his grasp. He handed it to Jane and she gratefully accepted it, slipping it over her head. The NYU hoodie was huge on her thin frame, but she huddled into it cozily.
“Will has the same sweatshirt,” Georgy observed. “I stole it from him a while ago. I'm a hoodie-snatcher.”
“That you are,” Charlie said, nodding.
“You went to NYU?” Jane asked.
“Graduated recently —— a year early, but still.” Charlie smiled.
“Wait, can I just recap really quickly? —— If you'll let me, that is.” I paused, receiving an amused nod from Charlie. “So, apparently you and 'Will', Georgiana's brother, met in college — NYU.”
“We were roommates, yes,” Charlie said, nodding.
“Then you moved to Philadelphia to work for your father's company?” I prompted, egging him on.
“Good so far,” Charlie said, grinning — and I saw him look at Jane from the corner of his eye.
“Then 'Will' moved to North Carolina to work for his father's company,” I finished. “So, you all are kind of connected between three different cities.”
“True enough,” Georgy confirmed. “—— Wow, we sound so estranged.”
“I like how you say 'Will' like allegedly that's his name,” Charlie said, smirking at me, rubbing his chin. “
I take it you haven't met him.”
“How could I? His sister just moved into our house two weeks ago,” I said, shrugging.
At this, he smiled and turned to face Georgiana. “Well, Georgy, I know I'm not your brother.” Charlie shrugged, setting his can down. “But you seem really happy and well-matched — in good company, so to speak. I think it's really good for you, given your previous living situation at home.”
“Thanks,” she said, nodding. “If you can do me a favor and convince Will to think the same way, I'd be so grateful.”
“And why do I get the feeling that our conversation has slowly been sliding toward this focal point?” Charlie raised an eyebrow.
“Because it has,” Jane deadpanned, smiling. Charlie reciprocated the expression 10-fold.
15 minutes later, we heard the intercom buzz, and Charlie whipped his head around, slightly startled. He turned back to us and excused himself, hopping over the sofa quickly and making for the door. He leaned in toward the speaker of the intercom, pressing the silver knob. “State your purpose.”
Static, then a deep, alarmingly POd voice — “Charlie, if you don't ring me up I'll tear you limb from limb. —— Seriously.”
At this, Charlie hit the buzzer and whipped around with a full-fledged grin on his face, eager to gauge Georgiana's reaction. Her expression processed many things at once, and then her jaw dropped incredulously. “Is that? —— No. —— No, you can't be serious!”
“So much for telemarketers,” Charlie said, laughing.
“You're such an ass!” She leaped from the couch, swinging at him. “Oh, my God. My brother's here. Will's here!”
“Well, shit.” I raised an eyebrow and Jane looked at me.
Georgy proceeded to swat at Charlie. “So, when I called you and told you I would be here on Saturday —”
“I might have called your brother five minutes afterward.” He blinked. “Bear in mind, though — he was way too busy to come here originally. Something happened at work that changed it. I thought I should tell you.”
Georgy looked extremely puzzled. “You're telling me that three seconds before he's about to walk through those elevator doors? Charlie. What happened? He's not still stressed, is he?”
“He snapped.”
“Again?”
I turned to Jane, chewing my lip thoughtfully. “This guy sounds a little scary. Maybe we should just leave discreetly.”
“Stop that —— we're guests,” she reasoned, turning toward Charlie for the barest of seconds.
“What if he's cuckoo for cocoa puffs, Janey? Do you honestly want to take that risk?”
“Lizzy, show some compassion.”
I grinned at her, taking her hand. “Damn, this sweatshirt smells good.”
“I know,” she grinned, then blushing accordingly, sobering. “I mean… I guess.” Laughing, I yanked her to the corner of the living room so that we could peer quietly and unnoticed into the foyer where the elevator entrance was.
It chimed softly, and the doors opened as a young man — very tall, dark haired and quite unreasonably attractive — entered.
“Wow, Georgiana's family gene pool is pretty much set,” I murmured, and Jane snorted, elbowing me.
Will Darcy was all freshly pressed suit, wide, broad shoulders, and strong jaw line. I thought I'd just look at him for a second or two longer.
He dropped his bag neatly by the intercom, and was suddenly yanked back with the force that was his little sister, practically launching him into an embrace.
“Oof!” He stumbled back. “Good God, Georgy… breaking ribs often?”
“Sorry,” she grinned, kissing his cheek. He beamed right back at her, and, for a second, I couldn't help but smile with him. “I missed you,” he said, taking her hand, then turning to Charlie. “And you, of course. But, you know… you're an ass — I always miss you.”
“I know,” Charlie said, grinning proudly.
“What happened at work?” Georgy then asked, quite seriously, her expression morphing into one of clear composure.
But Will Darcy looked back at his best friend with narrowed eyes. “You told her?”
“I had to tell her. You can always explain later,” Charlie assured him, clamping a hand on his companion's shoulder. “Will, come on in and meet your sister's new roommates.”
“Housemates,” Georgy clarified, quickly. “There's a great amount of space there — I promise.”
“You mean you were serious?” Will Darcy spun around. “I really have to meet them?”
“I brought them here because I knew how important it was for you to know that I'm not rooming with total psychopaths,” Georgy said, seriously. “Well, actually I sought Charlie's approval first because I knew it would mean a lot to you. You just happened to show up anyway.” She paused. “And I wanted to tour the campus. Actually, there were a lot of motives for my swinging by. But you might as well meet them anyway.”
“Nice to know you've mastered that rambling problem, Georgy,” Charlie smiled, pushing his friend. “Now come on, you moody bastard.”
When we were all joined in the living room, I noticed, regrettably, how quickly Will Darcy sobered into an absolutely rigid, tight-lipped being. I don't even think he meant to. Call it social awkwardness or not, but it was definitely uncomfortable. His back was ramrod-straight.
“I'm Lizzy,” I said, and he could only nod coolly, blue eyes that matched his sister's darting toward my sister and back to me. I shifted, somehow feeling like I was getting an extremely uncomfortable once-over.
“How was your flight?” Jane asked, politely, linking her hands together.
“Fine,” he answered, his deep voice flat.
“Not turbulent or anything?” Charlie prompted, as if taunting a joke.
“No.”
And then all was static for a couple of minutes.
You've dialed the Awkward Hotline. Leave your monosyllabic answers and we'll get back to you as soon as we can.
“Should I order pizza?” Charlie offered, breaking off the silence. Will glanced at him passively.
“Um,” Georgy said, cracking her knuckles. “Sure, I'll go get the phone.”
As she and her brother moved for the kitchen (Charlie shrugging apologetically behind them), Jane and I stood in the center of the living room, exchanging glances.
“Well, isn't he a pocketful of sunshine?” I mumbled, dryly, and she chided me.
“He probably wanted alone time with his sister and best friend,” she said, wincing. “I feel like we're imposing.”
“Nobody else seems to mind,” I said, shrugging. “Maybe he's got a complex — a fear of mingling.”
“Lizzy.”
“Apiphobia.”
“A fear of bees?” Jane snorted, starting toward the kitchen.
“What's that one where you fear people?” I asked, rolling up my sleeves. “Anthrophobia? Anthropophobia?”
“Lizzy,” Jane whispered. “He'll hear us.”
“Whatever.”
Georgy poked her head out of the doorway to the kitchen, rifling through takeout menus. “Hey guys.”
“You okay?” Jane asked, glancing at one of the menus quickly.
“Charlie said there would be a pizza menu here somewhere.” She paused. “Maybe it's in the cabinet of the living room.”
“I'll help you look,” Jane offered helpfully, and they disappeared in the opposite direction.
I was just about to enter the kitchen when I realized that Charlie and Georgiana's brother were having a private conversation inside. I slowed to a stop, hesitating.
There comes a time in one's life when you can do the mannerly, polite thing, smile discreetly and turn around to go look for your twin sister and pint-size housemate.
That time would have to come later.
Lingering and hidden by the doorway, I spied Charlie removing napkins from a cupboard, his friend sitting gloomily at the kitchen table. It was a shame, to tell you the truth — Will Darcy was really go
od-looking. A stick in the mud, sure — but a really good-looking stick in the mud. Which is kind of ironic because mud isn't really attractive. I'll remember to work on my comparisons in the future.
“I wish Georgy had just come alone,” Will said, sulking, fixing the collar of his shirt. “I missed her and I'd much rather just spend time with you two.”
Charlie rolled his eyes. “You should be grateful. She doesn't know her way around downtown Philadelphia — she's lucky to have these girls.” A pause. “Besides, I think they're quite wonderful.”
“They're really kind of dull.”
Charlie rolled his eyes. “One usually makes stupid assumptions like that when he doesn't bother to have conversations with the people he meets.”
Owned.
“What's there to talk about?” Darcy reclined casually. “I don't know them.”
Charlie snorted, “were you absent that first day of Kindergarten when they force you to make introductions and small-talk with other classmates? And possibly share crayons?”
At this point, I was fairly convinced that I was platonically in love with Charles Bingley.
“Are we sharing crayons, Charlie?” his companion muttered, dryly.
“Well, I like them,” Charlie murmured, hiking up his sleeves. “They're really nice, sweet girls.”
“You like the blonde,” Darcy declared, and I cocked my head, surprised — even more so when Charlie hesitated.
“What? I do not.”
“You couldn't stop making goo-goo eyes,” he pointed out.
“That's ridiculous,” Charlie assured him.
“She's wearing your university sweatshirt.” Will smirked.
“She was cold,” Charlie insisted.
“It's your favorite.”
“No, it's not,” he grunted.
“You like her.”
“Fine.”
I grinned, glancing over my shoulder. I wish Jane had been in the vicinity. Inside, Charlie smiled sheepishly. “Fine, I like her. She seems really sweet.”
“She's very pretty,” Darcy noted, drumming his fingers on the edge of the table. “Probably lacking in the personality department.”
“Oh, William.” Charlie sighed, slightly annoyed. “You know, her sister's very cute, too. Maybe this visit might actually be worthwhile for you.”
