I nudge Krystal in her side and whisper, “Shhh, shut up, idiot.”
Krystal scowls and nudges me back.
Ignoring Krystal, Boom Boom continues with her ‘good cop’ routine. “Like I said, Angela is in danger. It’s imperative we find her immediately.”
Blackbird gazes down his bulging stomach at Boom Boom’s face and, in between giggles, says, “An… Angela is in trouble?”
“Yes, very much so,” Boom Boom says, gently touching Blackbird’s right hand (which is still strapped to his chair). “You do care for her, don’t you? You do what to keep her safe, right?”
Blackbird sniggers and says, “But of course! Angela and I are the bestest of friends! We’ve been through all kinds of shit together.”
“So you would do anything to help her out, right?” Boom Boom asks quietly. I glance around the room to find everyone staring at Boom Boom in awe. It’s like watching a master at work.
“But of course,” Blackbird blurts out.
“Well then you need to tell us where she’s at, Mr. Blackbird,” Boom Boom says, continuing to weave her web of deceit and feigned sincerity. “Do you know where President Klaxton is hiding?”
“Of course I do, silly,” Blackbird says in between titters. “She went to our fallback positon. I was going to join her, but I didn’t want to accidentally lead anyone to her. So instead I joined up with my loyal associates off the coast of Antarctica.”
“Yes, we know,” Boom Boom says, doing her best to keep Blackbird from going off track. “But we need to know where Klaxton is hiding. Where is she, Mr. Blackbird? Help us find her so we can keep her safe.”
Blackbird cocks his head to the side and flashes one of his inebriated, shit-eating grins. “Well else would she be, silly? She’s at the only place on the planet where she’s safe from assassins and bounty hunters. She’s in the Amazon Rainforest, with her most loyal supporters, the Chiquito Tribe.”
LeBeau slams her fist on her desk and exclaims, “I knew there was a chance she’d be there! Didn’t I tell you, Secretary Montgomery? Didn’t I tell you?”
“You sure did, Madam President,” Montgomery says with a roll of his eyes. Under his breath he adds, “You also mentioned about a thousand other places.”
“The Chiquito Tribe?” Boom Boom says in surprise. “But that makes no… actually, that makes a helluva lot of sense.”
“Um, it does,” I ask, scratching my head. I’m having a hard time concentrating, as my withdrawal symptoms have returned with a vengeance. I grit my teeth and do my best to ignore the excruciating pain wracking my quivering body.
“Yes, and if you paid attention to current events you would understand, too,” Boom Boom says all snobbily.
“I don’t understand,” Krystal says.
“My previous statement applies to you as well,” Boom Boom says.
“Bitch,” Krystal grumbles.
“If you’re finished insulting us, please elaborate,” I say irascibly.
Boom Boom takes a deep breath, which is usually her precursor to expounding on a lengthy, detailed response to a question she deems stupid. (She thinks most questions are stupid, by the way.)
“There used to be dozens of tribes in the Amazon Rainforest, several of which were completely isolated from the rest of the world. Now that most of the Amazon has been razed to the ground, however, there are really only two tribes left, the Chiquito tribe and the Ashaninka tribe. Back in the 20th and 21st centuries, these tribes were two of the largest ones in South America, with populations numbering nearly 100,000. Now the tribes have been reduced to only a few hundred members, a majority of which are composed of the descendants of dozens of extinct tribes. Both the Chiquito and the Ashaninka tribes have incorporated a lot of the traditions and teachings of the extinct tribes they assimilated.”
“And Klaxton is friendly with the Chiquito tribe members?” I ask.
“Yes,” Boom Boom replies. “When Klaxton first ascended to the presidency over 20 years ago, she wanted to do something about the rapidly vanishing Amazon Rainforest. As evil as Klaxton was, she did do a lot for the environment. She knew rainforests are absolutely vital to decelerating global warming, mostly because all the trees help soak up the excess carbon in the atmosphere. The Amazon has been reduced to less than 10% of its original size, thanks to centuries of rampant deforestation from loggers and rapid desertification as a result of skyrocketing temperatures. Klaxton wanted to save what was left of the Amazon, so she banned all loggers and ranchers from the area. She also signed a peace treaty with the Chiquito and Ashaninka tribes, which had basically been at war with us for infringing upon their homeland. The treaty with the Ashaninka tribe quickly fell apart, as they started attacking the Chiquito in an attempt to take over the entire Amazon basin all for themselves. The Chiquito sent word to Klaxton that they were under attack, and Klaxton responded by sending hundreds of soldiers into the Amazon to repel the invasion. A good chunk of the Ashaninka natives were wiped out and retreated back to their original settlements. Since then the Chiquito and the American Government have had a generally genial relationship. The Chiquito and American soldiers stationed just outside the Amazon worked together to clear out rogue loggers and ranchers, and they also worked together to keep the Amazon from shrinking even further. We even started planting some trees on the outskirts of the rainforest, and our weather drones have been creating artificial rain showers to keep the jungle from drying out.”
Boom Boom’s narrative suddenly takes a darkened turn as she turns toward LeBeau and bitterly says, “But our relationship with the Chiquito started deteriorating as soon as she took over.”
LeBeau stands up straight and does her best to portray a woman of strength. (We all see right through the façade, of course.)
“Now listen here, girlie, I will not stand here and be criticized by someone who has absolutely no idea what they’re talking about,” she says in a shaky voice.
“Oh, I know what I’m talking about alright, girlie,” Boom Boom says through gnashed teeth. The look of shock and indignation on LeBeau’s face is priceless. “Less than a week after you took office, you rescinded the peace treaty we had with the Chiquito and issued logging permits to various companies. You also opened up the Amazon to cattle ranchers and farmers. In the three short months since you’ve taken office, you’ve nearly reversed all the gains we made during Klaxton’s entire 22 year reign as dictator of America. Now the Chiquito have become our enemies and are attacking our South American military outposts. And quite frankly I don’t blame them. No wonder they accepted Klaxton with open arms. She’s the only one to treat them like actual human beings.”
LeBeau narrows her beady little eyes and says with a sneer, “Ironic that you’re defending the woman who helped kill your boyfriend.”
“You fucking bitch,” Boom Boom growls.
Boom Boom lunges toward LeBeau, but Grenade and I are quick to restrain her.
“Let me at her!” Boom Boom shrieks, thrashing around in our arms. “Let me at her!”
“Keep her away!” LeBeau barks, hiding behind two of her agents.
Several of the agents point their guns at us. Boom Boom stops squirming, but she continues to clench her fists and growl.
Grenade whispers into Boom Boom’s ear, “Now’s not the time nor the place, darlin’. You gotta learn to pick and choose your battles. Trust me, this is not a battle you want to wage.”
Boom Boom nods and does some breathing exercises to quell her volcanic rage. I can’t blame her for going off. I was no fan of Arrow, but I know Boom Boom valued their friendship… and their blossoming relationship… a great deal. His death has affected Boom Boom as much, if not more, than Dorothy’s death affected me. Arrow’s murder has created a void in Boom Boom’s heart that she hasn’t come close to filling. LeBeau is lucky Boom Boom didn’t blast a hole in the center of her forehead.
Grenade raises his hands and takes a single step toward LeBeau, who is still hiding behind her gun-toting goon
s. “Let’s all take a couple deep breaths and step back from the ledge, okay? We don’t need to be fighting one another. We need each other. And you may hate to admit it, Madam. President, but you desperately need the assistance of my dear bounty hunting friends. You know perhaps more than anyone else how popular these kids are with the American people. Your constituents will not be too happy if they hear their favorite teenage bounty hunters were gunned down in the Oval Office shortly after hand-delivering one of our most-wanted fugitives. Trust me, things like that have a way of getting out. You won’t be able to hide it forever.”
LeBeau emerges from behind her goons and says, “Don’t be ridiculous. I have no intention of gunning down the people responsible for putting me into office in the first place. I just wish your young female friend over there would mind her manners when she’s talking to the leader of the free world. Every decision I make is intended to enhance the security and freedom of our citizens. The world is complex, and sometimes alliances have to be broken for the greater good.”
“But…” Boom Boom starts to say, but Grenade raises his metallic hand, effectively silencing her.
“I understand your grievance, and I assure you Boom Boom will afford you the courtesy that you deserve from here on out. Right, Boom Boom?”
Grenade turns toward Boom Boom, his fiery red eyes glowing so brightly that I’m forced to look away. Boom Boom growls a little, but she does tacitly nod her head
Grenade turns back to LeBeau and holds out his arms. “Splendid! Then we all are in agreement that it’s best we carry on with our fragile truce. Now how about we move on to more pressing matters, namely Klaxton’s apprehension?”
A bit calmer now that her little tit-for-tat with Boom Boom has blown over, LeBeau leans back up against her desk and says, “Now that we know Klaxton’s general location, I say it’s time we flushed her out of the jungle. I will send out the order for several thousand of our finest troops to fly down to the Amazon. They can then invade the rainforest from all sides and hunt her down. Klaxton will be brought back to us, dead or alive, and her severed head will be sent to the Chinese on a silver platter. That should be more than enough to placate their ravenous appetite for war.”
Deep down inside I think we all know that’s a load of bullshit… that even if we do meet their demands and hand over the carcass of our former president, the Chinese will just find another excuse to provoke us into a confrontation…. But none of us speaks up. That’s a problem to be addressed at another time.
I notice Secretary Montgomery exchanging an uncomfortable glance with Grenade.
Grenade blows smoke rings into the air before replying, “We could do that, but it would be incredibly stupid.”
LeBeau gasps, taken aback at essentially being called ‘stupid’ in front of her own staff. Before she has a chance to offer a rebuttal, Grenade rattles on.
“You see, Madam President,” Grenade says, stressing the madam part so we all know he’s using the title sarcastically, “my good friend Boom Boom and I were discussing this exact scenario just a few moments ago.”
At least now I know what they were whispering about right before Montgomery summoned us to the Oval Office.
“While at the time we certainly had no idea where Klaxton was hiding, we both knew her location would inevitably be revealed, thanks in no small part to the extraordinarily powerful truth serums your chemists have become quite adept at producing.”
Grenade takes another puff of his cigar and blows smoke into the face of a nearby secret service agent before continuing. “And since we knew it was only a matter of time before we uncovered Klaxton’s whereabouts, we figured it wouldn’t hurt to start developing a strategy to facilitate her capture. One of the options we discussed was, do we send in a veritable army and use an inordinate amount of force to subdue, or possibly even kill, her? Or would it be best to go with a more covert strategy? A ‘surgical’ strike, if you will? With a smaller team we could sneak up on her, use the element of surprise to nab her when she least expects it. As someone who has had plenty of experience organizing and participating in covert, black-ops style operations, I can tell you with 100% certainty that a surgical strike will be much more effective than a sprawling, clumsy, invasion-style approach.”
Grenade blows more smoke into the air, waiting for LeBeau to respond. LeBeau strokes her pointed chin, apparently deep in thought. After a moment of reflection, she turns toward Secretary Montgomery and asks, “What’s your opinion on the matter?”
“Bitch can’t even make a decision on her own,” Krystal mutters under her breath, so that only Boom Boom and I can hear her.
Montgomery clears his throat and says, “I’d have to go with my buddy on this one, Madam President. Klaxton has to know we’re going to find her eventually. She will be expecting us to come after her. In fact, she’s probably counting on it. And because of this, she will have scouts all over the rainforest, looking for even the tiniest sign of a pending assault. She’ll see an army coming a mile away. You can’t exactly hide something like that. It will give her plenty of time to sneak away. And if she escapes from us again, we will never find her. This is our last, best hope to bring peace to the world. A small, covert operation is just what the doctor ordered for this particular mission.”
LeBeau taps her fingers together, musing over Montgomery’s words. After an uncomfortable moment of silence interrupted only by the occasional cough and clearing of throats, LeBeau heaves a heavy sigh and reluctantly says, “I suppose you are correct, my friend. It would be extraordinarily foolish for us to squander the highly prized ‘element of surprise’, an element countless commanders in chief would have given their right arm for during such trying times. But that leads to another puzzling question: who would lead such an assault?”
“I can,” Grenade says, his lit cigar still dangling from his clenched, yellow teeth.
LeBeau scoffs. “You? You and what army?”
Grenade gestures toward me, Krystal, and Boom Boom. “This one.”
“I beg your pardon?” Krystal blurts out.
An incredulous smirk creeps across LeBeau’s pale, tired face. “Just the four of you? Trekking through the desolate wilderness of the Amazon Rainforest, taking on an army of indigenous savages and a psychopathic maniac who nearly brought us to the brink of nuclear Armageddon? Surely you cannot be serious.”
“Surely I am serious, toots,” Grenade growls, his fiery red eyes glowing even brighter than the end of his lit cigar.
LeBeau throws her hands up in exasperation. “This is ridiculous. Why am I even entertaining this daft, quixotic plan? The element of surprise be damned, I’m sending in the military.”
LeBeau turns toward her desk and reaches for the holographic control panel that I’m assuming will put her in contact with the military. Montgomery lunges toward LeBeau and grabs her wrist, causing quite a few of the stunned secret service agents to reach for their guns.
“Cindy, wait!”
LeBeau spins around, startled that Montgomery was brash enough to grab her. She glances at the secret service agents bringing their guns up and puts them at ease with a wave of her free hand. The agents lower their guns, but they do not holster them.
“What is it, Secretary Montgomery?” LeBeau snaps.
I have a feeling she’s more pissed that Montgomery called her by her first name than she is that he grabbed her arm. People in power always seem to think everyone should call them by their elected title, especially their underlings. It was also an almost pathetic attempt by LeBeau to remind Montgomery (and the rest of us, I suppose) that she’s in charge. That she’s the president of the United States. That she’s, at least in theory, the most powerful person on Earth. But the fact that she has to give out these subtle reminders to everybody proves just the opposite. President LeBeau is ‘Leader of the Free World’ in name only.
Montgomery notices all the agents fingering the triggers on their guns and wisely releases his grip on his boss.
In a
much more respectful tone, Montgomery says, “Madam President, I understand your hesitancy to go with such a scaled-back operation, but I know that deep in your heart you realize this is the right play. More importantly, think about how this will help galvanize our demoralized citizenry.”
LeBeau cocks an eyebrow and says, “Go on…”
Luring LeBeau into his web, Montgomery replies, “Boom Boom, Krystal and Lance are unquestionably the most popular people in the country. Most citizens are distrustful of the government, and rightly so. It’s not your fault, of course, but the fact that your predecessor nearly plunged us into a nuclear holocaust has left a bad taste in everyone’s mouth. So we need to take advantage of all the goodwill the American People have bestowed upon our celebrity bounty hunters. You know, use it for propaganda purposes.”
“You ain’t using me for no propaganda purposes!” Krystal blurts out.
I nudge Krystal in the side and whisper, “Shush.”
World War Forever (Highway To Armageddon Book 2) Page 18
