by C. C. Snow
It gratified me to see his face darken with anger when I finished.
“Asshole,” he spat out.
I nodded. Some might call us throwbacks, but we had been raised to believe women were meant to be cherished. I didn’t need to be an eyewitness to know Nichols had set out to use his strength against Elle. And any man who didn’t respect women did not deserve any consideration from us.
Jake placed his hands on his desk and leaned toward me. “You and Elle are moving awfully fast.”
“This coming from a man who put a ring on his wife within months of meeting her?”
“Touché, little brother.” He grinned and then sobered. “So this is serious?”
“As a heart attack,” I said without hesitation. “We still have some issues to work through and she’s gun shy, but she’s it for me.” Remembering her panic attack at the mention of meeting my parents, I grimaced. After I heard about her twisted relationship with her mother, I shouldn’t have pushed her so hard. Elle was bound to have issues with familial intimacy.
There was still a lot I didn’t know about her, but I knew the essence. I only needed to watch her with Aiden for a few minutes to know she had a heart of gold. She was honest and smart and talking to her was almost as good as sex. What man wouldn’t want to claim her?
But despite her agreement to be mine, I knew I was still on shaky ground. Patience had never been my strong suit and holding back with Elle was testing my limits.
“How far do you want to go?” he asked.
I loved how he threw his support behind me without any reservations.
“All the fucking way,” I said, my jaw jutting out.
He nodded. “The project is all yours, but go slowly. Just keep in mind that if Nichols is pushed too far, he might strike back.”
I smiled evilly. “Let him try.”
***
The week dragged. Work was insane because the external auditors were combing through every financial report. I had zero concerns about the outcome because my team adhered to the strictest standards, but we still had to work into the late hours, pulling the statements the auditors needed.
By the time I got home, I was exhausted. And not being able to see Elle was grating on my nerves. We exchanged texts and a few phone calls, but I wanted to hold her. I still found it hard to believe I had finally broken through her barriers and I didn’t want to give her a chance to rebuild them.
When Saturday rolled around, I was antsy and impatient. I contemplated going to the café to see Elle, but I knew I’d end up dragging her to my place and then I’d never make it to my parents.
As it was, I barely made it through the whole meal before I excused myself. Jake had a lot of fun at my expense, but I merely covered Aiden’s eyes, gave my brother the bird, and left amid teasing laughter. I made the hour drive in forty-five minutes and as soon as I reached the city limits, I called her.
Just hearing her voice—a low, sexy register—made the knot loosen in my gut. There was something elusive about Elle, as if she could disappear into thin smoke any second. It made me fucking crazy.
I couldn’t believe how much I had missed her over the last week. Anticipation ran hot and fast in my blood. As I navigated the streets, I started to fantasize about all the things I wanted to do to her sexy body when I got her back to my apartment. And I got an instant boner.
“Jesus,” I muttered, reaching down to adjust my cock. Just the mere thought of her made the damn thing salute. One of these days I was going to let my guard down and embarrass myself in a meeting.
As soon as she opened the door, I knew I had to alter my original plans. Her shoulders were rigid with tension and her smile was a touch too brittle. I mentally sighed. She had had too much time to think.
I leaned down and kissed her lush mouth briefly. It almost killed me, but I didn’t slip my tongue in to taste her even though I was dying to. I had learned the hard way I couldn’t push her or she’d bolt. “Hi, baby. You up for a walk at the park?”
Her big brown eyes widened. “Park?” She looked adorably confused by my question.
I gently tugged a strand of her midnight hair. An image flashed across my mind of that same hair brushing against my thighs as she took my cock between her plush lips and I bit back a groan. I had been with a lot of women, but Elle blew my mind in every goddamn way. And not just in the physical sense.
I struggled to keep my voice light and teasing. “I know you’d prefer to have your wicked way with me immediately, but I can’t have you thinking I’m easy. I need a little bit of wooing before you use my poor body.”
Her outraged laughter made me grin. But my words had achieved the results I wanted because her shoulders lowered and facial muscles softened.
Good, now she knew I wasn’t just after sex.
I sensed Elle had always been judged by her physical appearance and she hated it. The memory of her expression the night we met, when I called her beautiful, still made my stomach cramp. I needed to let her know I wanted to know her, inside and out. Yes, she was gorgeous, but her spirit was even more alluring to me.
At least she was no longer hiding her spectacular body behind ill-fitting clothes. Discreetly I ran my eyes over her in male appreciation. She was in skin-tight jeans that showed off her long legs. Her wool jacket was thick, but it couldn’t conceal her hourglass figure—her full breasts and tiny waist. My palms twitched, remember how her soft flesh felt in my hands.
I hated how she hid her body, as if she were ashamed of her sensuality. I laid the blame squarely at her mother’s door. Instead of celebrating her daughter’s transition into womanhood, she had repudiated Elle’s developing body. And I had my suspicions that her relationship with Nichols had only exacerbated Elle’s insecurities.
I mentally cracked my knuckles, relishing how I was going to make him pay.
She playfully punched me in my gut and growled. “You’re insufferable.”
Smiling, I covered her fist, unfurled her fingers, and laced our hands together. I started to move toward the car. “Is that a yes to the walk?”
She nodded and smiled. “Yes. That sounds like fun.”
Unable to resist, I leaned down to kiss her again, this time tasting her mouth the way I wanted to. She folded her arms around my neck and kissed me back. She tasted like moonlight spiked with whiskey—cool and ephemeral, but with a hell of a kick. And in that moment, I didn’t care if we didn’t make it past second base.
Okay, that was a blatant lie. I wanted to take her in the back of my car like a horny teenager on prom night. But I could endure abstinence if it would get her to trust me.
Reluctantly, I pulled away and led her to the Porsche. During the ride, I talked about my dinner with my parents, hoping to acclimate her to the idea of meeting them. From her stiff responses, I knew I had a lot of work ahead of me.
Once we parked, I took her hand in mine. “What do you say to a cup of hot chocolate? I know a café that makes it like they do in Paris—with real chocolate.”
“Do they add little marshmallows?” she asked with a small smile.
“Of course. They’re not savages,” I said with horrified face, my chest clenching at the sound of her musical laugh.
Despite the cold night, the park was filled with people who came out to enjoy the clear, crisp air. We spent an hour wandering around, people-watching and talking about everything and nothing. Her sharp mind and sharper tongue never failed to delight me.
I couldn’t remember the last time I had such an uncomplicated and innocent date and it felt nice. More than nice.
On the way back to the car, Elle abruptly stopped in front of a dark alley.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, senses on alert.
She didn’t answer and I followed her gaze to see a figure rummaging in the large dumpster in the middle of the alley. One dim bulb and a green exit sign provided enough light for me to see that it was a man, his head covered with a dark beanie, his bulk clad in thick layers of clothes.
“Wait here.” She swiveled her head and ran across the street without any explanation, her long hair streaming like a banner behind her.
After half a beat of hesitation, I followed her into an all-night corner store, my legs easily keeping up with her long strides.
She walked to the row of refrigerators, her eyes scanning the contents. At first I thought she was looking for something to drink, but she opened the door and took out two saran-wrapped sandwiches.
My heart swelled, ready to burst through my chest. I knew immediately what she was doing.
I had told Jake she was it for me, but when our grandchildren asked me when I fell in love with her, I would cite this exact moment.
She was fucking perfect.
Compassionate and giving. Beautiful and complex. Strong and vulnerable.
Perfect.
I wanted to wrap my arms around her and tell her I was never letting go, but my inner voice warned me to tread lightly.
“Too soon,” I quietly cautioned myself, reminding myself I needed to be patient with her.
Walking up behind her, I reached over her shoulder and grabbed the rest of the sandwiches.
Startled espresso eyes met mine and I couldn’t resist dipping my head for a quick kiss. “I’m sure there is more than one person in that alley,” I said.
Golden glints appeared in her eyes like fairy lights and she grinned. “I also get drinks.”
I nodded and unloaded my stash into her arms. “I’ll grab some sodas and water.” Picking up a couple of cases of drinks, I walked up to the counter. A hard look from me had Elle putting her money back into her pocket.
“I’m not going to fight to pay,” she said with a sassy smile. “After all, you could afford to buy lobster rolls for everybody in the city without making a dent in your pocket.”
“We’ll do that next week,” I said dryly, handing my card over to the clerk.
Smiling, Elle carried the bag of sandwiches and I tucked the two cases of drinks under my arm.
“How often do you do this?” I asked, opening the door for her.
She shrugged. “Every now and then.”
But from the practiced way she approached the homeless man huddling next to the dumpster, I knew she had done this often.
There were a total of six men and one woman in that freezing alley, some covered in blankets and a lucky few in a tent they had somehow managed to procure. I wondered how long they would survive in this weather. It was already late October and it would start snowing soon. Not many would last a winter’s night in Chicago without four walls and a roof.
They gratefully accepted the food, devouring the sandwiches as quickly as we handed them out.
Any of the other women I had dated would have wrinkled their noses with disgust at the smell of urine and unwashed bodies. They wouldn’t have come within feet of these men and woman, let alone deign to have a real conversation with them.
But Elle focused on each of them, as if he or she were as important as the prime minister of Great Britain. I watched, mesmerized, at the way she managed to bring smiles to their faces with a few well-chosen words.
It humbled me.
It made me realize I needed to do more. I might give money to countless charities, but I had stopped seeing—really seeing—people like those in this alley. It had taken Elle’s incredible compassion to open my eyes.
Quietly, I stepped aside and made a few calls. Then I walked back to the group. “If you would like to stay in a shelter tonight, there’s a van coming in ten minutes that can take you to the Pacific Garden Mission. You don’t have to go, but they have seven beds ready for you as well as hot soup.”
Eight sets of eyes stared at me in astonishment before one of the men shouted out, “Fuck yeah. My balls are freezing.” That made the rest of them laugh and they started to pack their things.
Elle’s huge eyes remained on my face. “How did you get the shelter to take them? They’re normally full. And hot soup? At ten o’clock at night?” She snorted, clearly conveying her disbelief.
“I called and they happened to have some spaces tonight,” I said with a bland expression. “And they had soup left over from their dinner service. I guess nobody likes soup.”
“Bullshit,” she said with narrowed eyes and took a step closer to me. “How much did you promise to donate?”
I pressed a hand to my chest, pretending to be offended. “Are you accusing me of bribery?”
Her face gradually relaxed, her lips lifting into a slow, sexy smile. “Bribery. Extortion. Philanthropy. I don’t give a damn. Thank you.” Placing her hands on my shoulders, she pushed herself onto her toes and kissed me. When she came down on her heels, I had almost forgotten what we were talking about.
“You’re pretty amazing, Elle Lazzaro,” I said, my voice husky with desire, and pulled her into my side. Other women threw themselves at me for giving them expensive jewelry and perfume, but my baby looked ecstatic that I had given away my money to a shelter.
“For buying a couple of sandwiches?” she scoffed.
“For caring about your fellow man,” I replied, refusing to let her belittle her kind act. “For seeing people in a way others—including me—don’t.”
She flicked a glance at me before returning her gaze to the two men taking down the tent. “When you talk to them, you realize many of them ended up here because they merely made a stupid mistake. Fate screwed with them. They trusted someone they shouldn’t have. Some of them have mental health issues. Somehow they end up on the streets and then they become invisible to society.”
“But you see them,” I said, rubbing my chin on her hair. The scent of her herbal shampoo reached my nose and it smelled more enticing than the most expensive Parisian perfume.
“Because I know what it’s like to not be seen,” she said so softly I almost didn’t hear her.
A fist squeezed my chest, making it hard for me to breathe. “Because of your mom?”
She froze for a second. “Yeah.”
I frowned, wondering at the hesitancy in her voice. “I see you, baby,” I said into her hair and tucked her closer to me, wishing I could tell her self-serving bitch of a mother off.
Twisting around, she kissed my jaw in acknowledgement, her long lashes lowered over her eyes.
When the van pulled up, everyone was packed up and ready to go. After waving goodbye, Elle and I finally made our way to the car.
On the ride back to my apartment, I kept reminding myself not to pounce on her. God, I never thought charity work would make me hot, but I was ready to jump her bones the moment I saw her holding those soggy sandwiches.
When the elevator doors closed behind us, I opened my mouth to ask her if she wanted a drink when she bracketed my face with her hands and kissed me. Desire roared through my body, obliterating all my good intentions. I hauled her against me, placing my hands on her sweet backside.
She broke the kiss, put her mouth to my ear and whispered, “I want you to fuck me hard. Then I want to taste your cock again.”
Jesus. My cock was ready to pound nails. This woman and her beautiful, filthy mouth.
This woman was perfect for me. Fucking perfect.
Chapter 15
I didn’t know what prompted me to open my email account.
Maybe I was tired of being a coward. Maybe it was because I knew it was wrong to cut her out of my life when she had been the only bright spot in the darkness for years.
Maybe a certain infinitely patient, unbelievably generous man was making me reassess my closed-off life.
Just the thought of Troy made something yawn open in my chest. The last few weeks had been a euphoric combination of hot, intense sex and fun, carefree dates. He had a way of making me feel like the broken parts of me weren’t irreparable. He had a way of giving me space to breathe without allowing me an opening to run away.
And it was slowly dawnin
g on me that I was content to live in his velvet cage. I pressed my palm against my chest to massage away the stab of panic. After taking a half dozen, measured breaths, the anxiety dissolved and I smiled in triumph at my small victory.
I shook myself out of my reverie and refocused on my screen.
My pulse jumped when I saw the new email sitting in my inbox.
Elle, why won’t you talk to me?
I pushed out a long breath and opened the message.
Elle,
I won’t accept that you’re cutting me out of your life. If I did something to make you mad, I’m sorry, but it’s not fair for you to not communicate with me. Once I get access to my trust fund on my twenty-first birthday, I’m going to hire someone to find you, so you better watch out!
Love,
Your very-annoyed-with-you Gwen
A smile pulled at my lips at her threat. That was Gwen. Tenacious. Stubborn. Unstinting with her love, even when the recipient didn’t deserve it.
Before I could change my mind, I hit reply.
Gwen,
You can call off the bloodhounds. I’m sorry for going off the grid. You’re right. I should never have stopped talking to you.
Happy belated birthday.
Love,
Elle
I tapped the key to send my message and rolled my tense shoulders, fighting off the rush of apprehension.
After a minute, the chat application appeared on my lower screen.
Elle?
I hesitated and then started typing, my fingers unsteady.
Me: Yeah, it’s me. How are you?
Gwen: I’m mad at you!
Me: I know. You should be. I’m sorry.
Gwen: Where are you? Are you ok? Why have you been avoiding me?
Me: One question at a time. I’m in Chicago. I’m fine. As a matter of fact, I’m doing great. And I’m sorry about not keeping in touch. I needed a fresh start. I’d rather not talk about it, but I’m fine now.
Gwen: Okay, but if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.
Me: I know. Thanks. So what’s new with you?
Gwen: I’m graduating next year!
