by L. D. Davis
My eyes were so wide that it hurt the skin that pulled taut around them. My mouth fell open in a silent cry, but my feet, my damn feet didn’t move fast enough. His fingers bunched the material of my coat at my chest as he drew me closer, closer, and closer still until our bodies touched.
“How many times have I told you to pay attention when you are walking? When will you learn?” Larson Wright asked me.
***
My insides froze and became as heavy as rocks as I stared up into those devastatingly blue eyes. My body shook violently. The only reason I remained standing was because Larson was holding me up by my coat. His smiling mouth was so close to mine that onlookers most likely thought we looked like a couple caught up in the moment, about to kiss.
“I see that you are still friends with Sahara,” he said conversationally. “How was lunch?”
I couldn’t answer him. I couldn’t speak at all. I’m not even sure I was breathing. I could only stand there, like a coward, shaking.
He looked me over carefully, his eyes assessing the knit cap on my head, my hair, my eyebrows and eyes, my nose, my mouth.
“I like your hair down like this, but then again, I really liked the ponytail you had it in the day you came to the city to shop for your gala dresses. You looked…adorable.”
I didn’t even remember what my hair looked like that day until he mentioned it. How did he know? How could he have known? Did a few pictures spring up online?
“Did you enjoy riding in Breck’s Gran Turismo? Did you tell him about the Bugatti you have waiting for you at home?”
Home… Where ever he was would never be home to me again. I would never go home to him. He could take that car and shove it up his –
“It is a shame that you have chosen that Camaro over such a fine car like the Bugatti, but then again…” He chuckled softly. To anyone else’s ears, it probably sounded jovial and warm, but it was menacing to me. “Then again, you are still eating in the car. Your crumbs are scattered across the seat and floor and even in the gearshift. There are coffee stains on the console and in the cup holders. Noa,” he said, shaking his head disapprovingly, “you do know how I feel about that. You know I do not approve. It is so…déclassé.”
Somehow, my hands found his. Absently, I attempted to free myself from his grasp. I felt like prey gripped in the jaws of my vicious attacker. My breaths were coming so fast, I was beginning to hyperventilate.
“Ssshhh,” Larson hushed me, leaning impossibly closer. “It is okay, my love. I will forgive you when you are ready to return. When you are finished playing with Breck, I will be at our home waiting for you.”
He sighed heavily before running his nose along my cheek. A choking, squeaky sound left my mouth.
“Noa, my love,” he sighed again before speaking near my ear. “Why do you run around with that trash? Do you really believe he can love you when he so enjoys copulating with all of those harlots? Or are you simply having fun?” He stood upright again, but still too close to me. “I will allow you your fun for now; I am not here to collect you. You will come back on your own when you are ready, but please do not try my patience and wait too long, Noa.”
His lips pressed against mine and my gut clenched with revulsion. I was prepared to bite him if his tongue slipped into my mouth, but he was already pulling away and releasing me. One large hand covered one side of my face.
“Come home soon, love.”
He stared at me for a second longer before stepping away from me and then disappearing into the busy crowds of the city.
I slid in the booth across from Alden nearly twenty minutes later than our agreed upon time.
“It’s about time, pokey,” he teased as I pulled off my coat.
“Sorry,” I said, immediately looking at the menu and not looking up at him. “I took a nap and overslept.”
“It’s cool. How was your lunch with your girlfriend?”
“Great. She’s happy about the tickets and she would like to reimburse you.”
“It’s taken care of,” he said quickly. “Why won’t you look at me?”
Ignoring his question and avoiding his eyes¸ I asked, “How was your music making…thing?”
“It was good. Why won’t you look at me?” he asked again, but with less patience.
“How am I supposed to decide what to eat if I’m not looking at the damn menu?” I snapped.
I was only mildly surprised when the menu was yanked out of my hands. Slowly, I raised my head to look at Alden.
“What the fuck?” he said, staring at me with discerning eyes.
“What the fuck what?” I asked innocently as my hands twisted in my lap.
“You look like you’ve been crying,” he said with enormous eyes, like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Like I wasn’t freakin’ human and couldn’t possibly cry from time to time.
Biting back my irritation, I said, “I told you, I was sleeping.” I reached for my menu, but Alden withheld it from me.
“Alden,” I sighed.
“What happened? You were fine this morning – and don’t tell me any bullshit about sleeping, Noa. Your eyes weren’t even this red after you had two hundred screaming skanks stomping on your back.”
“I feel like I’m getting sick,” I said and rubbed my eyes. “Maybe that’s it.”
“We’re not ordering until you tell me the truth,” Alden deadpanned.
I looked at him carefully and realized that he was going to hold his ground. We would sit in that booth all night if necessary, or until I gave him the truth or something that sounded true enough. I couldn’t tell him I literally ran into Larson. He would go ballistic, and I didn’t want him to be worried about it. I needed to handle it on my own.
So I lied.
“Okay,” I blew out a long breath. “I was upset about some news I heard today. I don’t want to talk about it. Now give me my menu.”
Alden stared at me with his mouth set in a firm line as he tried to figure out whether or not I was telling the truth.
“What was the news?” he asked.
“Damn it, Alden,” I tried not to yell. “I just told you I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Well, if it is making you cry, I want to talk about it,” he snapped.
I grabbed my purse and coat off the seat, and then slid out of the booth without another word. I had no problems eating somewhere else, alone.
I walked outside, right into a freakin’ asshole with a camera. There were two more assholes nearby. When they started calling Alden’s name, I didn’t have to turn around to know that he had followed me outside. With his hand on my back, he guided me to the ever-waiting limo and ushered me inside.
“Take us back to the apartment,” Alden told Al and then closed the privacy window.
He turned in the seat and glared at me. I was sitting on the other side, as far away from him as I could get.
“Get over here. Now,” he commanded, pointing to the space right next to him.
“Stop telling me what to do!”
I was just irritated that he wouldn’t let it go, but not irritated that he was being his typical bossy self. His commands were different from Larson’s. Larson didn’t yell; he didn’t get dramatic. But that was worse than if he lost his temper, because I never knew when he would strike. I didn’t think for even a second that Alden was going to hit me if I didn’t obey him.
“Noa, if I have to move you over here, I may hurt you in the process. If you don’t move over here, I will move you myself.”
With a loud sound of exasperation, I moved over to the space right beside him, but for Alden, that wasn’t close enough. He put his hands under my thighs and ass and lifted me into his lap. He still wasn’t satisfied, however. Even as I tried to fight him away, he forced me to straddle him and then held me securely around my waist.
I sighed in defeat.
He softened as he peered into my face, frowning. “Do you want to tell me what’s going on with you?”
&n
bsp; “No,” I said softly, choosing to look at my hand on his shoulder rather than look him in the face.
“You look so sad, Little One,” he said and tugged on my ponytail.
“A little bit.”
“Did something happen at lunch?” Alden asked and wrapped his big, warm hand around the back of my neck. His touch sent shivers down my spine.
“I told you. I heard some news that upset me,” I lied again.
“Are we going to keep going in fucking circles with this or are you going to tell me what the hell is wrong?”
I picked at some invisible string on his shoulder.
“Damn it, Noa, look at me.”
My eyes shifted away from his shoulder to meet his hazel eyes.
“Please, don’t make me talk about it,” I whispered, as I felt tears building in my eyes again. I had spent the entire afternoon in the penthouse crying and staring out the window, wondering if Larson was somewhere nearby watching for me.
Alden looked at me with alarm. His other hand reached up and cupped my face. After a moment, he gently pulled my head forward, resting my forehead on his.
“Okay,” he said softly. “I’ll let it go. For now.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “Thanks.”
I felt his light breathing on my lips as he slowly moved his hands over my shoulders and down my back. They slid under my jacket and under my sweater, and then smoothed over the bare skin at the small of my back. I shuddered slightly and involuntarily rocked my hips forward, surprised when I felt him hard and rigid against me. I surprised both of us when I purposely rocked forward again. Alden’s breath hitched with my own. I interlaced my hands behind him and rocked forward again. I moaned lightly as his hardness went over my clit through our jeans.
He put one hand on my hip to pull me forward again, making both of us moan. With his other hand, he pressed lightly on the back of my head, and it was at that moment that I realized I had not really kissed Alden yet. Somehow, it felt as if things would turn a corner if we kissed, that our physical relationship would go from casual to serious. Kissing was something I took for granted in the past. It never really did anything for me. It didn’t turn me on, it didn’t strike any emotional chords. It was a cursory act, but when I wrote about it, I wrote how I imagined a kiss should feel – the physical need to become one with the other person, the arousal, and the emotions that could make the hardest of hearts stumble…
I knew that if I kissed Alden, it would feel right; it would feel the way I’d always written in my books but never experienced for myself. If I kissed Alden, he would infiltrate me in ways I wasn’t sure I was prepared for, but the ‘ifs’ didn’t matter, because it was about to happen.
His lips lightly brushed mine at first, tentative, testing. When I didn’t rear back or slap him, he did it again, but a little harder, with more confidence. Then his tongue tasted my bottom lip, seeking permission to enter. As I rocked over his erection again, my lips fell apart to allow a moan to escape, and Alden’s tongue slipped into my mouth. He groaned loudly when his tongue made contact with mine, and he pushed his hips up as I moved on him. My moans were lost into his sensual mouth. If I had any doubts about Alden’s kissing skills before, they were lost. His tongue stroked over mine in a way that made my sex clench in want and my nipples pucker with anticipation.
I tightened my hold around his neck. I needed this distraction. I needed to be closer to him, but damn the coats and sweaters we wore to keep warm on a winter’s day. To hell with the layers of clothing when we had each other to keep us warm.
Alden pressed on the back of my head a little harder, deepening our kiss. He raised his hips up again and I grinded over him harder. Groaning, his fingers curled in my hair. When I felt his hips beginning to rise again, I moved forward. The kiss broke when we both gasped as his cock slid over the opening to my core.
“Alden,” I whimpered his name as I slid over him again.
In response, he planted his lips on mine and swirled that magical tongue around in my mouth. I felt his hand between us, close to my belly, but not until I heard his zipper did I understand what he was doing. Alden was so…big his jeans couldn’t possibly contain the monster for what we were doing. A moment later, when I felt the wide tip of his cock pressed against my lower belly, I groaned so loudly, I would be surprised if Al didn’t hear.
His hands gripped my hips where he lifted me and repositioned me so that my jean-clad heat was directly over his partially clad cock. Holding my hips in a killer grip, Alden began to move me as he pumped his hips up. The friction in all of the right places was driving me crazy. The roughness of my jeans pressed against my sex by the hard cock beneath me was undoing me. Knowing that even part of his bare cock was touching me was going to kill me.
I broke away from his lips so I could try to breathe as I called out his name again. He stared into my eyes as he simulated fucking me. I was so close. The pressure building inside of me couldn’t be pushed back down.
“I like watching your face when you come,” Alden whispered and nipped at my bottom lip. “I like having that power over you.”
Yes, power! This…this is the kind of power a man should have over me. This perfect, sweet, hot power.
I was right there. His hard shaft, his words, his face, everything about him was going to make me come. My hips began to jerk against him and I started to whimper with pleasure, and then…
“Mr. Breck, we’ve arrived at the apartment,” Al said over a speaker I didn’t know existed, and just like that, my orgasm fell away from me.
Just like that, I went from blind pleasure to feeling horror. If this scene had happened in a bed, Alden would have already been inside of me, but the bigger issue was that damn kiss. I still felt it on my lips even as I scrambled off his lap and he zipped his dick back into his pants. The inside of my mouth and my tongue still felt totally possessed by Alden. My whole body felt possessed by Alden after that damn kiss. My heart felt so heavy after that damn kiss with Alden, and if I had let him, he would have begun to possess that, too.
I felt his gaze on me as he started to open the door. I couldn’t look at him. I busied myself with my purse and waited for him to get out ahead of me. I heard his heavy sigh just before he stepped out, and as usual, he waited for me with his hand extended. I took it and climbed out of the limo. He led me into his building and onto an elevator. The ride to his floor was oppressively silent, but he did not release my hand until we were inside his apartment.
I was dreading the conversation that we needed to have, but a beautiful, blonde surprise waited for us inside. I simultaneously felt relief and outrageous jealousy when I saw Trisha Livingston lounging on Alden’s couch as if she owned the place.
I felt his body tense next to mine.
“Hey, there you are!” The starlet called brightly to Alden. “I tried texting you and calling you but you didn’t answer.”
“I didn’t answer your texts and calls because I was busy,” Alden said tightly. “Why are you here, Trisha?”
I took this opportunity to pull away from Alden and retreat to the guest room.
“Noa,” Alden said, reaching for me, but I moved faster across the spacious room. “Noa, you don’t have to go anywhere.”
“Oh, no, it’s fine.” I forced a bright smile. “Don’t let me interfere with your usual activities when you’re at home. I’m tired, anyway.” I smiled at Trisha who was watching me with a bland look on her face.
“Noa,” I heard Alden at my back, moving toward me. I ignored him as I closed and locked the bedroom door just as he reached it. I heard his sigh before I heard him snap at Trish. “You can’t just show up here whenever the fuck you feel like it.”
The rest of the conversation became muffled as I moved away from the door. I kicked off my sneakers as I pulled off my coat. I stripped down to my camisole and panties. I rooted through one of my bags until I found my Xanax. I took two instead of the recommended one and crawled into bed.
To say tha
t I was overly anxious would have been an understatement. I could still feel Alden’s tongue sweeping leisurely through my mouth. I could still feel the hard length of him rubbing against me. But I could also still feel Larson’s breath on my face, the sensation of being pinned to his body as he spoke in that low, deadly voice. I felt his lips on my lips and the revulsion that had coiled in my stomach.
I covered my mouth when a wretched, tearless sob tore through my throat. I was suddenly breathless, struggling to take in air and push it back out of my lungs. I kept my hand to my mouth to try to mute any sounds I made as I had a mini breakdown. I dropped down in a chair in the corner, put my head between my legs, and urged myself to calm down.
You’re safe. You’re safe. He’s not here. He can’t get in here.
But he had been in my car. He had seen my hair the day I came to New York with Alden to get my gowns. He had known I had lunch with Sahara. What else did he know and how did he know it?
In a panic, I got up and threw the curtains aside to peer outside. I was too far up to see if there was a blond-haired, blue-eyed man on the street watching me.
Which means he can’t see you, either, I told myself.
With shaking hands, I closed the curtain, dropped back into the chair, and put my head between my knees.
I wished Alden was there rubbing my back, caressing my hair, and making me feel safe.
But I couldn’t tell him. I had to handle this on my own. Larson was my problem.
I am not here to collect you. You will come back on your own when you are ready, he had said.
Did that mean that he was going to leave me alone? Or did it just mean that he wouldn’t make me leave?
What happens if I never go back on my own?
When sleep finally took me that night, I dreamt that Larson stalked back and forth in Alden’s living room in front of the windows as he glowered at me. He wanted to reach for me, he wanted to get his hands on me and do awful things, but he couldn’t. I was in Alden’s arms on the couch as he strummed his guitar, and not even Larson could touch me.
