Best in Bed

by Cheryl Dragon

  "Forget it. If you’d tried, I’d have kicked your ass. It never occurred to me you'd show up in the middle of a workday. You should know better than to think I'd do that to you. We share a lot of things, Lori, however men aren’t ever going to be one of them. I promise you that." Marina tugged on her jeans and then handed me a tissue. "Here, your mascara looks awful."

  I fixed my face as Marina's random boy-toy left, still suggesting a threesome. Marina tossed him out and locked the door.

  "So, why are you here in the middle of the afternoon? What's the emergency? Is something wrong?" She pulled her hair back into a ponytail. Now that the drama was over, the concern set in.

  Now that we were alone, I felt off. I'd gone ballistic over nothing and accused my best friend of something that rationally and deep down I knew she'd never do to me. "I need a drink first."

  Marina returned with a drink in under a minute to sooth their ruffled feathers.

  With a generous glass of raspberry vodka on ice in hand, I finally sat down on Marina's couch and actually started to calm down.

  Marina was puttering in the kitchen and I just wanted everything to stop. I wanted to have the answers. Marina came in from the kitchen.

  "I'm sorry." I took a long drink and exhaled. Then I looked at Marina and started to giggle.

  Marina had opted for red wine and put down a plate of her mom's holiday fudge. She started laughing too as she flopped back into her recliner.

  “He’s not bad. What happened to Seth?” I asked. "What were you thinking?"

  "I was thinking I hadn't had sex in five months. He had the right equipment and wasn't a total asshole." She shrugged. "What were you doing running out on work in the middle of the day to come pound on my door with yellow legal paper? What’s wrong? That’s not normal, even for you."

  That reminded me. "Where did I put that paper?" I dug through the cushions and found it under a pillow.

  "What is it?" Marina stretched and ignored the fudge as I dove in getting chocolate smears on my notes. She’d had sex; she didn’t need chocolate. I sure as hell did. Lots and lots of chocolate.

  "I made a list of Nick's pros and con." I licked my fingers.

  "Great. That'll really help." Marina rolled her eyes at me.

  "Wait, then I wrote up a list of how everyone I know and love would react if I brought Nick to my parent's Eve of Christmas Eve party."

  "Again, no surprises." Marina propped her toes on her coffee and table and wiggled them. Don't get me wrong, I was glad she’d had sex, but now I felt deprived. I wanted Nick. Her toes were a glittery red I liked. A sexy color, maybe Nick would like it too.

  "I know. I know that was a stupid thing to do. That's why those lists went in my shredder. This is a list of things I want to know from him. First, I want to talk about it and what I liked about him." I unfolded the crumpled list and stared at it. First, I wanted her opinion, without my influence. "What did he say?"

  "What about your list?" Marina asked.

  "That's the big thing. What did he say about me? I know what I want to hear. I want the truth. I've lived on fantasy long enough."

  Marina took a drink of her wine. "He said he was hurt. He felt like he wasn't good enough for you or the family. Apparently it really bothered him that he never met me while you two were dating."

  "Why you?" I asked.

  "Not just me. Did you introduce him to anyone in your life?" she asked.

  "Were you going to introduce me to what's his name in the shower?" I shot back defensively.

  "That's different. That's recreational sex. You and Nick went out. Eddie said he saw the picture in Nick's desk. You two at a party or something. You guys had an actual relationship. And you never let him meet your family or any of your friends.”

  I opened my mouth, then closed it again. There was nothing to say. I’d never thought about it like that. I loved having Nick all to myself.

  “I don't blame him for feeling second class. He should be pissed at you. He never met any of your friends? Not even a friend from law school?” Marina asked.

  I shook my head. "I guess I talked about you a lot. I wanted you to meet him. With him, it was too good to be real and I didn’t want to screw it up. What about you? Did you like him?"

  "When we weren’t arguing, he seemed very nice. Lori, when you're the topic of conversation, he gets very worked up. He’s a very direct guy. There’s a lot of emotion right beneath the surface. Mom says he's a nice guy who's fair and respectful."

  "High praise." I knew Marina's mom was a hard lady for young men to impress. She had five daughters and any man brought around had to be up to her standards. Luckily her standards weren't the same as my mother's. Her standards made sense and were good to rely on.

  "Very," Marina agreed. "He's hurt. You’re the one who broke it off. He isn’t about to come to you. You'll have to go after him. That wasn’t negotiable."

  "I deserve that." I stared at the list. "Do you think he wants me to?"

  Marina nodded. "Men don't usually argue so fiercely about women they don't care about. I can tell you that as an absolute truth from dealing with my four brother-in-laws. They may tease their wives, but if anyone else bothers their woman or even says a word against her, they get very defensive and aggressive—like Nick."

  I smiled. I tried to stop and couldn’t. "Think I can do it?"

  Marina looked back at me. "I think you'd be a dumb bitch not to try. And if you don't, I don't want to hear the name Nick out of your mouth ever again. It’d be more than I can take."

  "Sorry," I said. "I know I've made too big of a deal about this since I broke up with him." I'd never realized how much I talked about him.

  "That's not what I meant." Marina got up and moved to sit down next to me. "You can talk all you want to me, Jen, or a shrink if it helps. It won't solve anything. It sure as hell won’t change anything.”

  “I know, I know.” I had no other response.

  “You need to have it out with him. He's either worth it or he's not. You have to decide and then win him back." Marina shrugged.

  "My family." I shook my head. My courage was slipping just as it began to feel real.

  "Get over it. Your family will either accept it or they won't and you guys can come to my house for Christmas next year. Mom loves extra people. She gets sick of it being just her own daughters." Marina grabbed a box of tissues out of a bookcase for my inevitable water works.

  "What if he doesn't want me?" I took a tissue in case and rested my head on the back of the couch.

  "Lori, you can argue your way in or out of almost anything. I’ve seen you do it. Talk yourself into it and go do it. I have complete confidence in your ability to argue rings around Nick. And if you have to, seduce him. Men listen better when they’re naked." Marina grinned.

  "I can do that." I nodded and pointed to her toes. "Can I borrow that nail polish color?"

  Marina got off the couch and brought back the bottle of nail polish. "Keep it, it's you."

  I turned the bottle over and read the title of the slightly slutty color. "I'm Not Really A Waitress." I began to giggle. "That's me. Ready for seduction. I just don't want to chicken out."

  Marina shook her head. "Why don’t you sleep on it? Clear your head. Do your nails. And when the doubt comes back, just think about what your mother would tell you to do. Then do the exact opposite and don’t look back."

  Marina knew me way too well. “Thanks, I’m going to go try and take a nap.” I downed the rest of my drink and hugged Marina tightly.

  I walked carefully to the door.

  “You forgot your Nick yellow page.” Marina brought it to me.

  “Rip it up. I need to do this on my own.” I nodded. “I hope the next time I find you half naked with a man, it’s Seth in your shower.”

  “Me too.” Marina tore up the pages and locked the door behind me.

  I held onto my new nail polish and picked up my briefcase and purse that I’d left strewn in the entryway, a tribute
to my rush to save Nick from Marina. I felt like an idiot as I fished my keys out of my purse and went into my apartment and locked the door behind me.

  I tossed my purse and briefcase into a corner without another thought. My proper heels followed them. I carefully set down the bottle of polish and then stripped off my blazer, blouse, and skirt.

  I padded to my bedroom in nothing except a bra and pantyhose. I didn’t see the point of underwear under pantyhose and Nick had found that so sexy. Rummaging in the back of my closet, I knew exactly where his sweatshirt was. I pulled it over my head and hugged it around me.

  Digging through my linen closet, I found an old bottle of nail polish remover and a bag of cotton balls. I had a standing appointment in the salon to get my nails done in a neutral mauve. Not this time.

  I wasn’t very good at doing my own nails, but I was going to do them myself in trashy red. I was going to be so sexy he’d have to forgive me. At least he’d hear me out.

  I set my supplies on the coffee table. In the kitchen, I poured myself a glass of water and grabbed a pint of chocolate ice cream from the freezer. I set those on the coffee table too.

  Finally, I went to my desk drawer and unlocked it. I spread all of the keepsakes on the coffee table. The pictures made me smile as I sat down and began to remove the most boring and appropriate color from my nails.

  The phone rang and I didn’t move a muscle. The machine picked up. Who else? My mother’s voice was like fingernails on a chalkboard. “Hi, Lori. It’s your mother. I tried your office; they said you went home sick. Let your father or I know if you need anything. Gilda called and has a young man she’d like you to meet. I’ll set up a dinner for this weekend. Call me when you get this.”

  I glared at the phone and didn’t move. “No, I’m not going,” I said out loud. And I meant it. “I’m getting the man I want.”

  Before this weekend, I’d have Nick back and even if I failed, I wasn’t going to let my mother play social director of my life any more. Telling her no never helped. If I simply refused to show up, she’d be mortified. A couple of incidents like that and she’d stop trying.

  Why hadn’t I tried this before? She’d leave outraged messages on my machine or at work, sure. Who said I had to listen or return them? Marina was right, do the opposite and it felt great! It felt like I was already back with Nick.

  My nails were now clean and I ran to the bathroom to wash my hands. I looked into the mirror and saw the dull and proper Lori. I pulled my hair out of the neat clip and let it flow messy over my shoulders.

  Nick liked it better and so did I. Why had I changed it? I couldn’t remember now. It didn’t matter anymore. Now it would all be different. The way it should be.

  I went back and looked at that picture of Nick and me again. Nick and I were happy and I liked myself better back then. I missed that. I removed my pantyhose and sat back down to put that funky red on my nails and not just my toes, like Marina. I was going for it all.

  Suddenly I wasn’t so scared. Instead, I felt free. I couldn’t wait to see my mother’s face when I brought Nick to their holiday party.

  First, however, I had to get Nick to come with me. To take me back. I blew on my nails and noticed Nick’s medic-alert necklace among the stuff on the coffee table. I hadn’t put on any jewelry today. I slipped it over my head, careful of my nails. I wasn’t going to take it off until I had Nick back and he could take it off me naked.

  And I’d get what I wanted. It had taken me a few years to realize the truth. He’d forgive me. He’d have to! Marina forgave me for trying to kill her so how could Nick not for breaking up with him?

  I got up and went to the large mirror hanging on my living room wall. I admired his stainless steel cheap necklace on me. It meant more than all the expensive jewelry my parents had given me.

  Nick would forgive me and fall for me all over again. I’d take Friday off and go see him. This was a once in a lifetime thing. I wouldn’t get a second shot so I had to do it right. I’d make a hair appointment, get everything waxed and build up my courage.

  Chapter Eleven

  Jen’s Night Out Clubbing

  I’d blown it. Totally ruined everything. That realization just kept looping in my brain as I sat on my couch. My life was taking a nosedive and I couldn’t seem to fix it. Everything I did was wrong.

  In minor things, it’d been a bad day at work. Thoughts of Lucas had made me careless. I’d caused a grease fire that nearly singed my hair. That had trigged an all day fight with a co-worker. I had good reasons to hate that job. Unfortunately, still no news on the new job and I was resisting the urge to call. I didn’t want to look desperate and it was too soon.

  That’s bad enough. Then there was last night.

  I’d gone on a date with Lucas. A real date, at night, to a fancy restaurant that I’d chosen and we had wine. I felt terrible.

  It felt great in the moment. He had showed up at my door with flowers in hand and dressed in a cute suit. It was a complete surprise.

  I couldn’t say no. I didn’t want to. We hadn’t had the lunch with Marina yet. If that was over and she’d expressed no interest then maybe my conscience wouldn’t be torturing me. That voice in the back of my head kept telling me I was a horrible person and a failure at friendship.

  What if Marina never forgave me? I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop it. I’d tried. This lust thing had sounded fun, a force I couldn’t control yet. Would I ever be able to?

  Of course, last night during the date my enthusiasm drowned out the nagging voice of reason and caution. I’d even invited him into my apartment. I finally understood what all the fuss was about sex. I couldn’t help it. We hadn’t done everything, but I now understood why I wanted it so badly. The chemistry was intense with the right guy.

  It was attraction; it was lust. I couldn’t blame the wine or anything either. I’d invited him in and curled up on this very couch with him. He’d smelled so good and I wasn’t thinking.

  Not that I’d actually slept with him on the first official date. Though that depends on your definition of sex. I didn’t let it go past that. Still it was a first for me. Great, wonderful, guilt inducing.

  I felt miserable. I’d betrayed my friend. I was half-tempted to cancel the lunch and tell Marina what I’d done. If she wasn’t going to care if I dated him in the end, would she care when it started? Why possibly make her mad or embarrass myself?

  What I needed to do was stop thinking about it. I couldn’t change history. I couldn’t confess to Marina now. Why hurt her if she wasn’t really interested? I had to get my mind off of Lucas and the whole thing. Maybe Lori could help. I willed my depressed body off of the couch and out into the hall where I knocked on Lori’s door.

  “Hey you.” She opened the door and nodded for me to come in.

  “Hi.” I didn’t even try to sound happy.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “Just stuff. Life.” I shrugged. I couldn’t divulge the details to her. Telling Lori was the same as telling Marina and it worked the other way, too. They didn’t keep secrets well. I could use the job thing, I decided. “I haven’t heard about the job yet.”

  “That sucks.” She nodded.

  “I need to distract myself. Get my mind off it. Any ideas?” I flopped onto her couch and curled up with a paisley throw pillow.

  She glanced at the clock and then back at me. “You need to get out.”

  “Out?” I wasn’t sure if I wanted that.

  Lori held up a finger and picked up the phone. “Marina, get over here. We need your expertise.” She didn’t even say goodbye.

  “All of us?” I asked.

  “Of course.” Lori looked like I was crazy.

  Marina walked in seconds later. “What’s the problem? My only expertise is animals.”

  “And alcohol. Jen’s depressed about her job and life in general. Are you up for a night of partying?” Lori kicked off her work heels.

  “I have the late shift tomorro
w so sure. Where do you want to go?” Marina asked,

  “I was thinking The Rattler. Don’t you know the owner?” Lori winked.

  “I know Louie from high school. I haven’t seen him since the reunion almost two years ago.” Marina didn’t look too thrilled with the idea.

  “You can get us in. You said he was flirting with you at the reunion.” Lori clearly wanted this. She had a plan for fun.

  “Yeah, fine. Go get dressed. We’ll leave in half an hour.” Marina turned before she left. “Lori, you’re driving.”

  “No problem.” Lori smiled and ushered me off of her couch to go make myself presentable.

  I shuffled along the hallway. Getting drunk in one of our apartments would’ve been enough. Now I had to get dressed, pay for drinks, and worry about men hitting on me or not hitting on me.

  However, dancing did sound good. The music might bring back some energy and help me forget the guilt. It’d be too loud to think in that club.

  Feeling a little better, I dug into my closet and found a cute dress. It wasn’t quite sexy, it did show what little cleavage I had to its best advantage. I felt a bit better just changing out of frumpy sweats and into something that made me feel like a woman.

  I did an up twist with my hair, enough makeup to make me not look scary, and shoes that were cute enough not to be vetoed by Marina or Lori, yet they wouldn’t kill my feet if I danced all night in them.

  Twenty minutes, that was a new record for getting ready. I stepped into the hallway and found Marina already ready. Her outfit screamed sexy in a low-key way. Black skirt and blouse with a black scarf that had just a hint of a red pattern for spice. She could pull it off. In all black, I looked like I should be at a funeral.

  Lori was always the last to join us. Marina saying thirty minutes meant she expected to have to drag Lori out by her hair at forty minutes.

  “Is the Rattler fun?” I asked.

  “It’s okay. Always crowded, plenty of people. Loud, trendy, and all that stuff.”

  “Cute guys then?” I wanted to sound like I was looking. I’d said enough nice things about Lucas, not that she cared. I hoped she didn’t.