by Love Belvin
“Huhn?” His question threw me.
“You said you played sports. Did you play softball? Or did you cheer?”
I sucked my teeth. “Whoa! Why does it have to be one of the two? Back to your chauvinistic ways, I see!” I feigned offended.
“I don’t mean to be chauvinistic. I was just using deductive reasoning. Did you run track?”
“No!” I swung, catching him in the right pectoral.
He belted a hearty laugh. Trying to catch his breath he asked, “Well? What did you play, Ms. Brimm?”
“Basketball!”
“Get the hell outta here!” he couldn’t stop laughing.
“Yes, point guard! Varsity!” I hissed over his loud amusement.
“Okay! Okay! I believe you. It’s just that I can’t picture you in a uniform. That’s cool though. I played a bit myself throughout school. I wasn’t the star of the team, but I partook.”
“Really? Now, see I can see all the girls lined up around the corner at your Tuesday night game, hoping to get a drip of your sweat flung at them.” I teased.
“Nah, not necessarily in that order.” He smiled at the ceiling, After calming himself, in a more serious tone he asked, “Did your boyfriends come to your games?”
“I didn’t have boyfriends, Mr. Jacobs. What type of girl do you take me for?”
“Well, I guess I’m asking did you have a lot of boyfriends coming up.”
“Oh, no! I am not about to share my number with you, buddy! That’s personal!” I declared.
“I would never think to ask you that question. My heart would never be able to stand an obscene number. I’m asking how many times have you been in love.”
Oh. That’s more reasonable.
“Ummmmm…I only had one boyfriend. I’ve told you this. I guess I was in love at the time…considering my age and lack of life experience. It was a train wreck of a relationship.”
“Are you still in touch with him?” His head turned to me.
“Oh, no! Absolutely not. We are worlds apart and I would rather keep it that way.” I chuckled at the thought of a man of O’s caliber approaching me at that point in my life. He would get the same half a look as Azmir’s younger Clan members.
“What’s so funny?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think about my past often and some things about it is hilarious.” I turned on my side to face him. “I’m content where I am now. I have only a few regrets and hope that never changes.”
Azmir’s eyes went back toward the ceiling, “Indeed.”
We sat in silence, I suppose recounting our exchange, or at least I was. The silence was peaceful. I guess it was agreeable to the early hour. But it didn’t last too long.
Azmir asked, “How do you know when you’re in love?”
My head swung up to catch his expression.
What an odd question…and coming from Azmir Jacobs. I was askew, and didn’t have an answer. I’d been getting by for so long without a legitimate relationship that I had no clue.
“I have no frame of reference,” I muttered, answering while the revelation hit me and I rolled back on to my back. I really didn’t know. “I guess that’s something I could take on in a session with Pastor Edmondson. Hmmmmm…what is being in love?” I said trying the question on for size.
Feeling it would somehow start answering the question for me as well, I turned my head to ask him, “How do you know when you’re in love?”
The next thing I knew Azmir lunged at me, pressing my body into the mattress using his full weight. He kissed me, pinning my head between his hands and in one rapid swoop from his arms, he pulled me on top of him. He shifted the covers so there was nothing between us, just skin on skin. His aged cologne was still present and intoxicating. I couldn’t ignore it as he ran his hands up and down my back while using his mouth to claim my tongue.
His kiss caused a blur in my mind and appealed to my heart, consuming me completely. It spoke secrets of Azmir’s being, filled with deep passion and unexpressed needs. I tried to keep up, blocking out the fear from his exposure. I didn’t want to run from it. He was raw and unshielded, something I envied. His actions were so arousing that immediately my juices began to flow. He worked me onto his steely erection pushing me down, burying himself inside my flowing depth. He held me close to his chest, just as he did the first time we made love in my house. I loved it because I could feel his increased heartbeat. And suddenly I wondered was that point of it. Did he want me so close that I felt what was going on the inside of him?
He pulled and pushed me into him to the point of me losing control of my rhythm from the overwhelming sensation of him being so deep inside, tapping my frozen heart. He pulled my hair forcing my eyes to meet his. And right there in that moment, the atmosphere charged between us. It was electrifying and he knew what was happening and demanded that I acknowledge it as well. Only, I felt the charge, but didn’t fully understand what it meant for us. All I knew was that he couldn’t be close enough no matter how deep inside of me he was. He couldn’t warm me enough, no matter how much heat emanated from his divine touch, thawing my chilled chambers. I wanted more of him. All of him.
It was frightening and all consuming, but I yielded to him. To it. Azmir and I made love, hard, with unerring precision and with no regret until our energies were spent and we fell sound asleep.
A rapid movement of my head jerking woke me from my sound sleep. When I opened my eyes I discovered Azmir’s index finger that flickered my bottom lip was the culprit. He was across from me, at the same distance and in the same position as he was when we were having our pillow talk. He lay on his stomach smiling adoringly at me.
“It’s a quarter to eleven. I don’t know how long you’ll need to dress but I’m gonna have to beat you to the bathroom. The throne is calling. I have a few calls to make about Kid’s gift while I’m in there. See ya in a bit.” He kissed me softly on my head before sauntering out of bed and into the bathroom. And I undoubtedly enjoyed his sexy gait until he was out of sight.
I stretched in the bed wishing there was no place to run off to, though I missed Azna. I was excited about picking him up later that day and wrestling with him on the Persian rug in the living room. He enjoyed rubbing his back into it. It was so delightful to watch.
So much had happened in the previous hours. Azmir was great…but different. He seemed more attentive and affectionate, even in public. I wasn’t used to that and didn’t know how to take it. I allowed my mind to fantasize about life as his wife. Would he be this affectionate? Would he make love to me this frequently? Would he remain this romantic? Oh, the possibilities! I didn’t force the thoughts for too long because I felt that even the possibility was a world away.
I needed to get myself together so that I didn’t blow the opportunity of this…friendship we were building. He asked me about my childhood! He said that he wonders about it when I’m not around! That swelled my heart. It felt good knowing that I was thought of by a man without motive—at least that was my assumption. I took him at his word.
My stream of thoughts were interrupted by the alerting of a text above my head. I slid up the bed to the nightstand and grabbed my phone, but I saw no notification. I looked up at the nightstand again and saw Azmir’s identical phone there. His phone didn’t have a case like mine, but apparently we had the same generic text tone.
Hmmmmm…he must have his Blackberry in the bathroom with him. How could he talk on the phone while taking a dump? Ewwwww! But how hot was it that he was handling business in every sense at the same time.
I laughed to myself and was interrupted when the phone alerted of a text again. I understood that Azmir was a busy man and his phone never slept, but today’s a Saturday and this is his personal line. Why the high activity now? It hadn’t buzzed all night or morning. I heard the sound of the shower starting to run and figured he wouldn’t be coming out any time soon. Curiosity and annoyance got the best of me and I picked up the phone. My primary mission was to sile
nce it until he came from the bathroom.
I saw on the alert screen that he had a text from Petey and then one from Dawn Taylor. What? I unlocked the phone, went into the text app and saw his exchange with Petey. They seemed to have been discussing Kid’s birthday, but much of their conversation was encoded and I couldn’t decipher it. What was clear was that Azmir informed Petey that his ringer had been off purposely so that he could not be disturbed—DND—but he would be turning it on at that moment.
Okay, that explains why the sudden vibrating activities, but what does Ms. Taylor have to say to Mr. Jacobs? Without thought, I went to their exchange and read.
Gr8 c’ing U last nite…but not 4 as long as I’d hoped. How long R U N town? Can we meet 4 breakfast (ALONE)?
A stinging sensation flashed through my chest upon reading her words. She didn’t say anything inappropriate, per say, but I knew she was interested in Azmir. A woman knows. Her attraction to him was undeniable from the way she gawked at him the night before in the club. But what could I do? I wasn’t his keeper…just someone he slept with and who kept his bed warm—every night. All the fittings of a bed-buddy.
I couldn’t deny the twinge of jealousy that spiked through my heart. All my recent inclinations of progressing to a deeper place with Azmir was quickly dissipating and I could feel the frosting in my heart so intensely that my body shivered and goose bumps surfaced.
I heard the shower water stop and assumed Azmir would be done soon so I tightened the sheet around my bare breasts in preparation of skirting back up the bed to return his phone to the nightstand. I could have never survived being caught.
The phone pinged again, it was Dawn—again.
Shit! Shayna just reminded me of a conference call that we have at 11:30. How bout lunch? I need 2 ask u about the woman u were with last night. Is she a “friend” of yours? I have my personal reasons for asking which is Y I wanna meet alone.:) Hit me up. Where R U? Which CASINO R U staying at?
That was as forward as it gets. She wanted Azmir. The emotions—the pain I felt were some that hadn’t surfaced since I was kid experiencing perfidy from O and Keysha. The distant memory from the sting of betrayal was still acute.
I reached up to returned the phone to the nightstand and immediately started experiencing hot flashes. From chilled goose bumps to hot flashes in the matter of seconds. My arm pits excreted sweat and my heartbeat increased. Azmir opened the bathroom door and I practically jumped out of bed in search of a few toiletries before gustily sprinting into the bathroom.
I felt it.
As much as I thought I’d improved on my responses to unfavorable situations, that familiar urge to shut down, run, and protect myself was too tempting—too easy. I was quickly slipping to self-protection mode, a place where Azmir wouldn’t survive.
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Rayna and Azmir’s love journey to be continued…
Thank you sooooo much for taking a chance on this love story! Didn’t I PROMISE it would only get better from Love Lost? And guess what—it does again! Please join us in the sequel, Love UnCharted!
#I’mGonnaMakeYouLoveMe
You can find Love Belvin at www.LoveBelvin.com
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Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
