I let the words pour out of her. Soon they became indecipherable. If it had been Claire sitting in front of me, I would have scooped her into my lap and stoked her hair and brushed away her tears until she was ready to take the next step. I bit the inside of my cheeks to keep from doing the same for Melody.
After a few minutes, Melody dried her eyes and looked up at me. “Is Harvey with you?”
“No, he’s still at your house,” I said.
Her eyebrow rose and her lips turned down into a devastating frown. “He didn’t want to help you find me?”
I rushed to explain. I knew letting her love for Harvey falter would only worsen our chances of dodging our fates. “No, no, no, Melody. Of course he wanted to come. He begged me to let him come, but I couldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“It was too dangerous for him to come,” I said. I wanted to say more, but Melody gave me no chance.
“And he just accepted that? Harvey would never have just let you pat him on the head and tell him to stay. He would have come after me,” Melody argued.
“Melody, this is a very delicate situation. If too many people become involved, the rules could change. I was afraid that if Harvey followed me, he would be killed before we ever reached you. I couldn’t take that risk.”
Standing up abruptly, she started pacing back and forth.
I stood up as well, trying to face her, but she wouldn’t stop moving. Out of frustration, I reached up and grabbed her shoulder. I was only trying to make her look at me so I could explain. The look on her face when my fingers gripped her shoulder scared me more than facing the Matwau ever had. Her face went completely pale. Her eyes opened further than they should have. Her lips separated just enough to gasp in a fearful breath.
I knew that my expression matched hers exactly. What had I done? My eyes burned with regret for that simple touch. I withdrew my hand only a second later, but the damaged had already been done. Melody stared at me, wanting an explanation, but I refused. I shook away her stare and struggled to find where I had left off. I needed to talk to distract us both, but Melody was quicker.
“What was that?”
“I’m sorry, I should have been more careful,” I said. Melody stared, waiting for a real answer. I cursed my stupidity with resigned sigh. “It was the Twin Soul bond trying to form. It can’t while we’re here, but our souls are reaching out to each other.”
“We’re really Twin Souls?” Melody’s question wasn’t actually for me. She reached up to the shoulder I had touched. “I don’t understand how this can be,” she whispered.
“Melody, Harvey loves you very much. I could feel that as soon as I met him. He stayed behind because I begged him to. I lied to him to make him believe you weren’t in any real danger,” I said. Melody turned to regard me carefully.
“You lied to Harvey? Why?” she asked.
“I didn’t tell him you were my Twin Soul. I lied and told him you were simply part of the prophecy, and that the Matwau couldn’t harm you because of the laws he has to obey. I told him you were meant to be my spiritual strength when I fought the Matwau, nothing more,” I said.
“He had a right to know the truth,” Melody said.
The tightness in her features and set of her jaw made me shrink back. Hadn’t I said the same thing to Quaile? My shoulders fell. Should I have trusted him as I had Claire? I shook away the thought. It was too late to turn back.
“It may not have been right to lie to him, Melody, but I couldn’t stand to put another person in danger,” I said. I looked up at her, my eyes stinging with unshed tears. “Claire was poisoned because of me, then almost died, then had to suffer the pain of resisting the bond. All because of me. Daniel was nearly killed by the Matwau because of me. You were kidnapped because of me. I just couldn’t handle the thought of putting Harvey in danger, too.”
Melody’s frown began to ease up.
“And he would have been in danger, Melody. The Matwau has creatures helping him. There are no limits on who or what they can kill. They would have seen Harvey as a threat and tried to kill him,” I said. “I couldn’t let that happen. You need him and so do I.”
Melody’s frown had turned into the hint of a grateful smile, but a question shone in her eyes. “Why do you need Harvey?”
“When I find you, it’s almost certain that the bond will form. When it does, you’ll need your love for Harvey to keep you from giving in to the bond. I need him for the same reason. The bond is strong. If you were willing to follow me, it will be so much harder for me to walk away,” I said. “I don’t want the bond any more than you do. I love Claire and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.”
Melody nodded stiffly. “I won’t give in, Uriah. I will do whatever it takes to make it back to Harvey.”
I knew her love for Harvey was just as strong as my love for Claire. What I didn’t know was if it would be strong enough to withstand everything we were about to put it through.
10: Three
The warmth of Claire’s body next to mine was more pleasant than anything I had ever experienced. Even in the bland darkness of predawn, the curves of her face were a welcome sight after a strange night. It was a relief to open my eyes and be free of the darkness where I met Melody. I groaned at the memory.
I couldn’t keep it from Claire. I wanted to. The idea of me spending my nights having conversations with the woman meant to steal my heart would only terrify her. It terrified me. It scared me even more that I was hoping the next night would bring me to her once again. I needed whatever information she could give me, but a section of my heart that I was desperately trying to ignore longed for the reunion on a totally different level, even stronger than before.
Pushing thoughts of Melody away, I buried my face in Claire’s locks. I knew I should wake her so we could continue our journey, but I couldn’t bring myself to disturb her when she looked so peaceful. I wondered how she could even manage to sleep with some much going on. The day I could lay down to sleep with no cares other than what chores I would have to do when I woke up would be a wondrous day. I wasn’t certain I would ever actually reach that day.
The quiet morning lasted only a few more minutes before Claire yawned and opened her brilliant eyes. Her sweet smile washed over me when she turned, but it didn’t last. It was a slow change. Her lips began to turn down. Her eyes narrowed. Her chest stopped its rise and fall as she held her breath. Finally, she spoke.
“What happened?”
The change, and seemingly random question, caught me off guard. “What do you mean, what happened?”
“Something’s changed with you,” she said. Claire rolled onto her side so she could face me better. Eyeing me intently, she brought one hand up to my face and held it there. “Something about the bond has changed. I can feel it.”
Talon’s words the previous night came back to me suddenly. He had heard Claire’s thoughts, but she couldn’t hear his, just as it had been with Quaile and Kaya. Now Claire was sensing the subtle changes in the bond just as other shaman were able to do. Ideas of Claire’s future whirled in my mind. “Claire, have you ever considered becoming a shaman? I think you’d be really good at it,” I said.
Claire scrunched her face at my offhanded reply and waved away my question. “What happened?”
I had to tell her. “Daniel told me once that he saw you in a dream when he was sick from his infected snake bite. He said you came to him and comforted him and told him he would be alright. Do you remember that?” I asked.
Claire shifted uncomfortably. “Yes, I remember. After I drank the poison, I was locked in this black, empty space. I couldn’t escape. Then one time I heard Daniel moaning in pain. I couldn’t help but go to him. I felt so awful for him. I didn’t know he remembered seeing me. I thought it was just a dream at the time.”
“I think that empty space is something between dreaming and being awake. It’s similar to both, but something completely unique,” I said. How else did you describe a
completely black universe when you were aware of who and where you were, but still had no control over when you came or went? “I don’t know what else this place is used for, or who else might visit it, but it seems to be a way for Twin Souls who aren’t yet united to contact each other.”
I waited for Claire’s response.
“You saw her again?”
I nodded.
“What did you say to her?” Claire asked.
“I told her everything.”
“Everything?”
“She needed to know what was happening. I asked her to try and find any clues about where she is so we can find her sooner.” I wanted to be sure Claire knew I hadn’t spent the entire night simply chatting and getting to know Melody.
Claire nodded slowly, but the concern in her eyes hadn’t left. “What else happened?”
Sweat seemed to spring from my pores at her question. I felt my heart rate rising, but could do nothing to calm it. When I finally forced out the words, they came as a whisper.
“I touched her.”
“You touched her? Why? You had to have known that would only make things worse!” Claire cried. Her tone said she was trying to be patient, but her hands were clenched tight around the blankets.
“It was an accident, Claire. I promise.” I took her fists in my hands and smoothed her fingers against mine. “I told her about leaving Harvey behind and she freaked out. She got really upset that he hadn’t come looking for her. I tried to explain, but she wouldn’t listen. She was walking back and forth, not paying attention to anything I said, and I didn’t think. I reached out, just to make her stop and listen. I didn’t mean to make the bond any stronger. I just wanted her to listen to me.”
Claire’s frustration melted into sorrow. “I’m sorry, Uriah. I shouldn’t have gotten upset at you,” she said. “I know you would never do something like that on purpose. I just got scared when I felt the change in the bond.”
The day before when Claire caught up to me sprung into my mind again, as did Talon’s words describing how he had heard Claire’s thoughts. When I was with Daniel, I had suspected at certain times that the bond had been trying to form before we made it back to San Juan, but I had never actually felt anything.
“How can you feel the bond?” I asked.
Claire’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “What do you mean? I think anybody could feel what I feel. The Twin Soul bond, it’s like it’s pulsing around you. How could somebody not feel that?”
“Claire, I never felt anything when I was with Daniel. I knew from how he acted that the bond was doing something to him, but Cole and I never felt anything. I don’t think normal people can feel the bond until it actually forms,” I said.
“Normal people?” Claire’s one raised eyebrow said she did not appreciate that I wasn’t including her in that category. I could only shrug. I was too curious about what else she could do to argue with her.
“Remember how I told you that Talon showed me what you were thinking when you first found me on the road?” I asked.
Claire nodded.
“Talon can’t do that with everybody. I’m the only one who can talk to him, and he can only hear the thoughts of people like Kaya and Quaile,” I said.
“You mean shaman? Talon can only hear shaman’s thoughts?” Claire eyes widened, the panic in her eyes startling me. About to ask her what was wrong, I was thrown again when she suddenly shook away the expression and exchanged it for one of unconcern. “I’m not sure what that has to do with me, Uriah. Maybe it was a fluke, because you and I are so close.”
“I don’t think so.” I thought about how Kaya said she had been able to see things others could not most of her life. I couldn’t imagine Claire would have had the same experiences and never shared them with me. I had no idea about how Quaile’s talents had developed, so I didn’t know whether Kaya’s childhood visions and impressions were a common occurrence for future shaman.
I looked back at Claire. She fiddled with a strand of her hair, staring off at nothing in particular. “Have you ever had any dreams that seemed like more than dreams, or saw anything when you touched somebody?”
Claire stared at me incredulously. “Like visions? No, never.” She paused. “Uriah, we have more important things to talk about right now, don’t you think?”
“I don’t know. Maybe this is important. Maybe you could help me find the Matwau if you really can do stuff I can’t.”
“Aside from all the strangeness surrounding you, I’ve never had anything shaman-like happen to me,” Claire said.
“Well, what about all the stuff with me?” I asked. “It wasn’t all on my end. Touching you hurts me. I can’t control you. None of my powers work with you.” Just like Kaya and I had discussed, everything that happened between me and Claire pointed to me needing to stay away from her. Not anyone else, just her. There had to be a connection.
“I…I don’t know,” Claire balked. Her body stiffened and turned away from me, not blatantly, but enough to appear as if she were hiding something. I didn’t understand why she was reacting like this. Turning back to me, Claire appeared to soften, but I could still see the edge in her eyes as she spoke.
“It could mean something, I guess, but it could have nothing to do with this at all. How am I supposed to know?”
Something about the tone of her voice alerted me. “I don’t know. How would you know? You said your dad told you about me. Did he tell you anything else?” I brought my hand up to Claire’s troubled face and gently pushed her to meet my gaze. She looked at me, but didn’t look any more inclined to talk.
“Claire,” I said softly, “do you know something?”
“Maybe…”
“What do you mean, maybe?” I asked. Claire leaned away from me, her eyes flitting back and forth as she thought.
“Quaile…gave me a book.”
A book? Why wouldn’t she want to tell me about a book? My eyes widened. “Did Quaile see something in you? Is it a book that has something to do with becoming a shaman?”
Excitement grabbed hold of me as I imagined the possibilities for my current quest and the future. “You would be a good leader for the pueblo, Claire. You’ve learned a lot about how not to be shaman from Quaile, and when you meet Kaya, you’ll learn ten times more about how to be a great shaman. I don’t know if your talents have just been hiding, or if the timing is different for everyone, but I think I’m right about this.”
“It wasn’t a book about becoming a shaman, Uriah. It’s a book about you.” Claire hesitated. “At least I think it is. I haven’t actually read much of it yet.”
“What? Why not?”
“Well, I couldn’t read and drive after I left her, and then when I finally found you all I wanted to do was be near you. I kinda forgot about it. There was a lot going on.”
“Why did me asking you about being a shaman remind you of the book?” I asked.
Leaning back onto her pillow Claire let her gaze rise to the plain white ceiling above us. I laid down next to her, propping my head on my hand so I could watch her expressions change with every new thought. I worried that she was going to clam up on me again.
“I thought of the book because Quaile gave it to me. She said it might be able to help us, but she didn’t give it to you, she gave it to me.” Claire paused, biting at her lip. “Maybe there was a reason she gave it to me.”
Understanding her hesitation wasn’t a problem, but I couldn’t afford to pass up even the smallest bit of information at this point. A pang of selfishness rose in me as I hoped I was right and she might develop talents that would help us end our journey more quickly.
“Claire, I know the possibility of being a shaman is a lot to take in, especially since we’ve grown up with Quaile, who everyone hates. Kaya is nothing like Quaile, though. The people in Hano love her. They respect her. She could teach you, guide you, if you really are a shaman. I think it would at least be worth trying.”
“You speak so highly of this Kaya w
oman. What did she do that made you respect her so much?” Claire asked.
“What she did wasn’t what made me respect her,” I said. “It was how she handled her talents. She never told people what to do. She told them what she saw and tried to help them make the right choice. She never lied or held back what she knew, either.”
“She could really see things about people?” Claire asked.
“Yeah, she did it twice for me on purpose, and once on accident. That was when she got the warning that the Matwau was about to take Melody,” I said.
It all sounded so normal to me as I laid next to Claire. I almost laughed at how much my reality had changed in the past week. I hadn’t believed in Twin Souls, shape shifting creatures, potions, or visions before approaching the Elders to ask permission to marry Claire. That one small step to hold with tribal tradition had changed mine and Claire’s lives forever. Countless others like Daniel, Melody, and Harvey had also been affected. I wondered when the ripples would stop.
“What about the other two times?” Claire asked, pushing away my previous thoughts.
Kaya’s visions had been extraordinary. I struggled to find the words to explain what I had experienced.
“The first time she did it, I had asked her to show me the vision Quaile had told me about. She showed me being chased by the Matwau, then fighting him to save Melody’s life. The second time was much different,” I said. I paused. Some of what I’d seen I was afraid to tell Claire. What would she think? I shook my head. Not trusting Claire with the truth had already proved a stupid thing to do.
“The second time was different. It was right after we found the prophecy about the Qaletaqa. I knew it was about me and I was scared to death because the last thing the shaman, Bhawana, said was that my Twin Soul and I were carried away to eternal happiness,” I said. I watched Claire’s jaw firm and her eyes tighten. “Kaya and Samantha both told me that Bhawana was probably just assuming that was what would happen, that shamans often mistake details of their visions because of assumptions. I wasn’t convinced. I asked Kaya to look into my future and tell me what she saw.”
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