Persuasion

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  safety did not ease her any. While she knew that she had no choice, she

  railed against a fate that allowed a young woman to be trapped in such an

  abhorrent manner. Lily pursed her lips and crossed her arms before her. The

  self-comforting gesture brought some relief and she tightened them about

  her, when the carriage came to a halt for no reason whatsoever.

  Frowning, she was tempted to stick her head out of the window and to

  inquire as to what was occurring, but the need for anonymity kept her silent,

  and, within seconds, she knew the reason why they had come to a standstill.

  Four women were shouting at the coachman and their lewd words made Lily

  flush with laughter. They had obviously walked out in front of the carriage

  without ascertaining if the road were safe or not. It seemed to Lily that the

  women were at fault, but from their heated words, Lily judged that they did

  not believe so.

  It was another part of London that never failed to surprise her. The

  cockney's impressive vocabulary had often made her laugh, where it sent

  her aunt into a fit of blushes. Lily sometimes wondered how on Earth Aunt

  Millie had made it to her age without hearing the imaginative curse words of

  the native Londoners.

  “Ga'on, yer bastard coachman! Almost knocked me bloody 'ead awf, yer did!

  Bloody cheek!”

  “Away with yer, yon women! Out of my sight!”

  “Be damned to the dogs, yer pig!”

  She grimaced as the carriage buckled a little, for what reason she did not

  know, but soon rode off into the night. For at least thirty seconds more, the

  women continued to rain curses on the coachman's head and Lily smiled

  again. How she wished for the freedom to declare her anger to the world!

  How she wished to have a voice that counted and truly meant something!

  She laughed at the thought. Utopia, London was not and never would be. Of

  that, Lily knew, but it did not stop her from wishing.

  Unraveling her arms from the tight clasp around her waist, she pressed her

  hands at either side of her lap and pushed herself higher up the seat. As she

  did so, she inadvertently nudged something and winced as her dainty fingers

  struck the wooden chest. She grimaced and curled her fingers to stretch

  them, then reached for the box and placed it on her knee. Her fingers

  rubbed the edges and she noticed it was engraved, but its decoration was

  much less interesting than its contents, although it probably delivered

  anything but good news! The thought prompted her to hover over the

  decision of whether or not to open the damnable thing.

  For a good three minutes, she hesitated and then slipped the lid from the

  box. In the darkness it was rather difficult to see its contents and so she

  held it up to the candle and saw a faint glimmer of something, what it was,

  she didn't know. Frowning, she dug her hands into it and felt the slippery

  sensation of material slide against her skin. Lifting it to the light once more,

  she flinched.

  What was this abomination?

  She flinched once more as she let it drop to its full length and rather than

  extinguish some of the light, it merely enhanced it! For the candle was quite

  clearly visible through the silk chiffon!

  Her mouth bobbed open and closed as she tried to assimilate what on Earth

  it was. Or rather, as she tried to tell herself what it wasn't. But there was no

  denying it. That bastard blackmailer obviously intended for her to wear this .

  . . this . . . silken rag!

  The nerve! The abominable cheek!

  She screwed it up into a tight ball and threw it across the short breadth of

  the carriage. It fell to the floor with a sinuous slithering sound and she

  turned her head away from it. Lily was rather tempted to throw the entire

  box across the carriage and damn the damage! But she managed to contain

  that desire and instead, placed it opposite her on the seat. How she noticed

  that a note still rested within its interior was a work of good fortune . . . not

  on her part, but that of the blackmailer's. How she wished that she hadn't

  seen it and that she could rebel against him in some small way. But see it

  she had and she grabbed it and squinted as she read it:

  The dress is of the latest fashion . . . for a Cyprian of that I assure you, my

  Lady Mercer. Wear it beneath your cloak or your dearest Mama shall suffer.

  Once the carriage comes to a halt, exit it and walk to the front door of the

  house. Unlock it. The key is in the box. Once the door opens, a servant shall

  await you and guide you to his lord's whereabouts.

  Wear the dress.

  Wear it.

  The last two sentences had been underscored and she flinched at the

  thought of not only undressing in the moving vehicle, which was akin to

  publicly denuding herself! Then re-dressing herself in the chiffon bit of

  nothing that would bare her completely, while covering her with nothing but

  a silken sheen!

  She cringed at the thought of complying, but what choice did she have?

  What choice at all?

  As the bastard had quite clearly stated, her mama would be in danger were

  she to not comply and so she had no choice but to do as he said and follow it

  to the letter.

  Closing her eyes against that most hideous of thoughts, Lily blindly stuck her

  hands out and sought the chiffon robe. It was not on the seat and she had to

  bend over and search around the floor for it, a move that almost had her

  falling over and breaking her damned neck! But finally, the dress, if one

  could call it that, was once more in her grasp. She licked her lips as her

  fingers dug into the chiffon and its delicacy had her wanting to pull it apart,

  rip it from the seams and damage it beyond repair so that she need not

  wear it.

  But she couldn't.

  The sheer futility of the situation had her gritting her teeth. Frustration and

  anger followed on its heels. She dug around in the box for the key the

  blackmailer had promised her and then placed it in a pocket in her cloak.

  Once that was safely tucked away, she held up the dress once more to the

  light and gulped. There would be no hiding once she was enshrouded in it.

  Every part of her would be completely bare to the naked eye.

  Slowly and reluctantly, Lily unfastened her cloak, which was a simple swathe

  of green velvet that was held together at the throat by a rather pretty, if

  useful brooch that depicted a sleek and arched greyhound in a dull gilt gold.

  She unfastened it and placed it carefully on the seat to her side. It was a

  precious gift from her papa and she wore it as often as she could. Even

  though he would more than likely have been disgusted by what she was

  about to do this night, Lily desperately needed the illusion that he was still

  here to protect her and her family from harm.

  Carefully, for the confines of the carriage were small, she removed the dress

  by throwing it over her head and wincing as a few of the buttons at the back

  popped loose. How she would mend those under Janie's beetle eyes, Lily did

  not know but she refused to think of that trivial matter at such a time as

  this! It was a simple linen Empire shift dre
ss, which was not too difficult to

  remove but more than anything, the thought of what lay ahead of her, had

  her taking such a long time about it.

  Underneath her dress, she did not wear her usual undergarments. Having

  deemed them a ridiculous addition to an outfit when one considered what

  the night held and she had taken to wearing her simple, thin linen chemise.

  Now, she thanked God she had worn that for it would be her saving grace in

  the abomination of a dress the blackmailer would have her wear!

  Her heart fluttered with relief, for the thought of having to rush naked

  through the street and enter a man's house while wearing an outfit that

  consisted of nothing but hot air, had been of nightmarish proportions! With

  the chemise however, at least the most important parts would be covered

  and even though she would only be covered a tad more, a tad was

  wonderful in comparison to completely nude. Her chemise was like manna

  from the Gods!

  Realizing that time had passed and that they must be nearing arrival, she

  ducked under the chiffon dress and settled it on her frame. Even in the

  relative darkness of the carriage, Lily could tell how clearly visible her flesh

  was through the thin material. She grimaced, but swiftly wrapped herself

  into her cloak once more, refastened the brooch and then sat there in

  silence. In an internal pocket in her cloak lay the key and so as to be ready,

  she reached for it and played with the thick metal in her palm as she waited

  for the carriage to arrive at the Earl's home. It was the early morning and

  the majority of London had retired to their beds. As had her household and

  how she wished she could be tucked up in the warm and comfortable cocoon

  of her four poster, but that was not to be. And it seemed that even though it

  was nearing four of the clock in the morning, that there were people like her

  roaming around the streets.

  At times, there were the sounds of joviality, of wild laughter and chuckling

  guffaws. From her past knowledge, she knew that those bawdy sounds

  would more than likely be from club parties, where the veritable Lords and

  gentlemen of the ton would be celebrating and enjoying the late hours of the

  night with their Cyprians. While the ladies of the ton were expected to retire

  early to their beds, their Lords and masters could do as they wished and

  how Lily envied them that freedom.

  It was a side of life she should know naught of, but, she did. Her older

  brother Devlin, the devil, had always included her in his tales of the ton.

  There was a mere five years between them and whenever he had escaped to

  London in the past, he had always returned with countless wicked tales of

  his naughty behavior that had always stirred her into laughing.

  Why?

  Firstly, because his tales were just that- amusing. His escapades seemed

  almost legendary and she had often loved to hear of his adventures.

  But secondly, and of this she had always been aware, he had in his own way

  been preparing her for her life with a husband, a husband who, more than

  likely, reveled in the ton's vices.

  It seemed strange, but it was Devlin's way of trying to protect her and she

  had always appreciated that. Indeed, more often than not, he did not tell her

  enough! And had he not been lax in his attentions, she would have

  understood what a seduction was without having to embarrass every female

  in her household to discover its meaning!

  Devlin had, in his own way, been disillusioning her. Many girls, he had

  always said, arrived in London with birds flying about their heads and

  flowers in their eyes. These chits sought love and the ton wasn't about love,

  he said. It was about expediency. She knew that and therefore had never

  been disillusioned. She preferred to know what was happening rather than

  have it hid from her. Not that he told her everything, as she well knew, but

  just enough to prepare her for a future with a boorish husband.

  What a wonderful thought!

  One of her governesses had once told her that to have impure thoughts, was

  to deflower the mind.

  That particular governess had never liked Lily and had told her mother that

  she would come to a bad end, due to her independent ways and her inability

  to keep quiet on subjects she felt most strongly about.

  That that lady was correct hurt her deeply. Her mind had already been

  partially deflowered, but tonight, her body would be receiving the same

  treatment but on a more permanent scale.

  She winced at the thought.

  Her fingers began to dig into the horse hair cushions and they merely

  gripped all the harder as the vehicle came to a halt. The cessation of the

  clippety-clop of the horses' hooves against the cobbled floor had her wincing

  again. The time had come . . . .

  Staring blindly at the candle, its flame almost burned itself on to her eyes.

  Lily knew not how long she sat there. All she knew was that she did not want

  to leave the carriage. That she did not want to go through with what she

  knew she must.

  The prospect of being a shamed woman should have meant naught in

  comparison to her mother's safety, but, after all her upbringing, how could it

  not?

  Men did not want impure wives. They wanted clean virgins that squeaked

  with their purity. They wanted the maidenhead as proof that no other had

  touched them and that they were their husband's to own and possess.

  Without it, she would be . . . . She would be as bad as a harlot.

  But what could Lily do?

  She swallowed and almost choked at the tightness of her throat. Her hand

  blindly sought out the carriage door and she opened it. The blast of air

  almost pushed her backwards, but she climbed to her feet and exited the

  vehicle. Without the aid of a footman, she almost stumbled but managed to

  right herself in the nick of time.

  Steadying herself against the door, she looked onwards and saw a faintly

  menacing, great black shadow. It was a house, a rather large one and

  detached at that. With wry introspection, she could see that the Earl had a

  fortune and that, regardless of his sour disposition, was what had had the

  tabbies and the matrons in a flush as they'd gossiped about him around the

  town.

  Behind the house's shadow was a large white cloud, which had been muted

  a dark gray from the night sky. A few stars twinkled above her and in one

  deep inhalation, she prayed for forgiveness. Prayed for absolution for the sin

  she was about to commit.

  When amen had departed her lips, she walked slowly up the short, gated

  pathway that led to the house and then ascended the front steps that led to

  the front door, as she did so, Lily fiddled with the heavy key that rested like

  a leaden weight in her palm. Facing the door, she inserted the key but did

  not turn it.

  Quietly, she unfastened her brooch again and let it hang limply to the side of

  her. Reaching for the other flap, she raised it to her face and let it cover her

  visage from the nose downwards. Using her arm to clamp the cloak to her

  torso, she turned the key and the sound of the lock clicking resonated

&
nbsp; through her like shotgun being emptied. She jumped, startled and then

  reached for the key and tucked it into her cloak pocket once again.

  As her hand rested on the doorknob, she wondered and not for the first time

  how her blackmailer was so aware of what happened in this house and how

  he had managed to gain access to it. Did her blackmailer know the Earl?

  They had to know one another, for how else had he been able to coordinate

  his plan with the staff. For a moment, she wondered if the Earl knew of the

  blackmailer's sordid plan, if he knew what she was being forced to do, but

  Lily swiftly discarded the thought. The Earl, she realized, hadn't even wanted

  to dance with her. Never mind anything else!

  Silly it might have been, but Lily was most relieved that the Earl, who had

  quite unknowingly come to possess a vital part of her, was not so villainous

  as the blackmailer who pushed her into this terrible situation.

  But now was not the time to think. If she thought, then she would surely

  end up as a bedlamite and instead she turned the doorknob and stepped

  over the threshold of the door and into the house. Instantly, and as her

  blackmailer had decreed, a servant stepped out of the gloomy hallway and

  bowed before her.

  Without saying a word, he turned on his heel and took a step forward. He

  paused, to ensure she was following and when she did, he walked her down

  the length of what seemed like a hellishly long corridor. As she stepped

  behind him, her earlier demand that she not think, raised its merry head. All

  of a sudden, fear rushed through her. Fear of what she would do if her

  mother were to discover this, or if her aunt were to learn of this. Fear of

  having to disrobe herself before him, fear of having to taking part in an act

  that would destroy her good name. Fear literally knotted her throat until it

  became almost impossible to breath, until merely inhaling and exhaling

  became a difficult chore and that she was seconds away from choking, Lily

  did not doubt.

  She wished then and there that Devlin had not hedged about this part of life.

  While he had readily informed her of the vices within the ton, he had never

  discussed what occurred between a man and a woman. If he had, then had

  her mother and father learned of this, then they would have throttled him!

  But in this respect, she was completely innocent to this part of life.

 

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