by Kiki Abbott
“And he knows it?”
“He does.” She smirked.
“Ben came to your room last night to give you a foot massage.”
Ben is a real sweetheart, very tender heart.”
“But you don’t have the same attraction as with Tony.”
“Not true. Every person is different. I’m extremely attracted to Ben, don’t get me wrong. He’s gorgeous but I’m still getting to know Ben, slowly.”
Crane continued. “And you had a rough week with Pierce.”
She nodded.
“But you talked it out with him?”
“Yes, and I think everything got misconstrued. I think the guys heard Pierce say he lived with a woman and it was taken the wrong way.
“You and Pierce have really hit it off.”
“We have. He offers something the other guys don’t have, which is an artist’s perception on everything. And that’s interesting to me. I’m still wondering where this is all going.” She laughed.
“Good luck making a decision, Kat.”
The cameras stopped rolling. Kat stood and entered the room with the framed photos of the men. After they took footage of her staring at the pictures, she said “I’m ready.”
It was another half hour before the men would gather in the main room, once the cameras were set. When summoned, Kat walked in and stepped up to the tray of roses.
She stood at the front of the beautifully decorated Chinese-style room, staring at the men. This would be tough. She nervously willed herself the strength to let the ones go she could never marry. There were seven men and only four roses. She reassured herself that the end was coming for all but one man anyhow. Grant would not be that man. Or Keith. Although she saw a life with Keith as happy, she just didn’t feel passionately for him. Would that come if they slept together? Maybe, but she didn’t want to take that chance. And letting Tony go, made her feel badly but she knew she’d never survive a marriage with that man. It would be a shame to let him go when she knew such passion with him but her path had to be higher than just going for the sexiest guy on the show. Tony would be bad news, and she had to get rid of him. Besides, he’d promoted his gym enough and would have loads of female business when he got back to Colorado. Something told her he wouldn’t look back long enough to think of her again.
When she called Pierce’s name for a rose, he looked genuinely shocked and not necessarily happy. Or was she just imagining that? Thinking she might take it back, she cautiously asked him if he’d accept the rose. “I will.” He smiled and the moment seemed to have passed. They hugged and Kat kept her eyes from the other men who’d warned her against him.
Colton, the cowboy, Ben the sports lawyer, Pierce the artist and Blake the Florida water skier were left. And the next leg of the show was hometowns. Next, she’d have an opportunity to see the men with their families, and hopefully be able to pick the last two. As they stood in the gorgeous room in the Hyatt Taipei, toasting to hometown visits, Kat thought about how all four men were so different.
Blake had recently indicated on their group date to the National Museum, he was smitten with her, and was looking forward to her meeting his family. He’d said they were a close knit group, lived on the water and had a ski boat just feet from the front door. He wanted to take her skiing and even though Kat had never tried, she was excited at the prospect. She was an avid snow skier. The appeal of his family was undeniable to Kat. She came from parents who’d been married for thirty-five years and wanted that for herself.
After filming shut down, Kat shared a few moments with each of the men, telling them she was really looking forward to meeting families. The mood was high but she walked away from the night more confused than ever. Ben was so easy-going, already assuming that they were ‘together’ and came off so confident, it was hard to ignore him. His family lived outside Atlanta in a little town where his father owned a hardware store and his mother was a school teacher. Ben’s sister would be at the dinner and she’d have a chance to meet them all, including his elderly grandmother, if they were lucky. Pierce’s parents were divorced and she’d only be meeting his mother and sisters, who all lived in New York City. Again, he seemed nervous to be taking her to his home and she had to wonder if he was telling her the whole truth. Colton was brimming with excitement, anxious for her to meet his daughter and parents. Kat worried about meeting the daughter. Colton was not a front runner but she kept an open mind about everything changing, if she could see him in a different light. His cowboy charm and good looks definitely kept him as a person of interest but Kat was waiting for their relationship to really take off. Maybe Colton was holding back until he saw her with the little girl.
Kat stepped out of the SUV, into the warm weather wearing capris and a frilly patterned blouse. This was Arkansas, late spring, and she’d worn a conservative outfit, not wanting to appear too sexy. The sight of Colton walking across the street, towards her made her heart speed up and wish that she’d at least worn something tight. “Hi Handsome!’
He scooped her up in a hug, twirling her around. “Welcome to Arkansas!” His lips made contact with hers and Kat was surprised at his enthusiasm, but kissed him back.
“I’m excited to see you!” she said.
“Me too! We’re going to have fun today,” his eyes twinkled.
“What are we doing?” They pulled back to smile at each other.
“We’re going to the ranch to ride my horses.”
Kat’s eyes widened. She loved to ride. “And Jessica Lynn?”
“We’ll meet her at the ranch later.” He looked excited, his grin spreading quickly across his face.
“I’ve been thinking about her on the flight.” Kat had rehearsed a few things to say to a small child like ‘what’s your favorite thing to do’ and ‘do you like to dance or sing?’ On the plane she’d tried to clear her mind of the other men, and was determined to focus on only Colton in Arkansas.
They saddled up at his barn and took off on a trail that started right from his corral. “I do this all the time with my horses,” he said. Colton was very attentive and flirty, had been all day. Kat teased him about being a macho man and he pretended to flex his muscles. This new side of him was fun as well as surprising, but she constantly wondered about living in Arkansas.
Riding back to the ranch house, they trotted and Kat worried that her bra might not be good enough for national TV, but giggled none the less. Dismounting in the barn, Kat saw a little girl outside skip, hand in hand, with a young woman. Jessica Lynn looked about kindergarten age with brown curls bouncing as she skipped along. When the girl saw her dad come around the corner, she squealed and broke away to run to Colton. Kat couldn’t help but have tears in her eyes at the sight.
By the end of the afternoon, Kat pictured herself in their lives. When Colton asked if she could see herself fitting in here, she replied “yes,” honestly, but wondered about being in Arkansas. Later, she’d google what there was to do in the nearest town that she’d only seen quickly when driving from the airport to the ranch. Colton’s parents lived five miles down the road on a ranch of their own. When Colton, Bug and her pulled up alongside their picturesque log house, Kat was captivated by the homey beauty of the setting. Weeping willows flanked the house, a porch swing waited for someone to plunk down lazily on a Sunday afternoon and two smiling faces emerged from the doorway to greet them.
Colton’s parents were warm, lovely people and although Kat knew they were on best behavior for the cameras, she liked them instantly. After a dinner around a huge block table with his parents, Bug and Colton’s two brothers, Kat was optimistic that his was a good life and any girl would be lucky to insert herself in to the mix. When Colton walked her to the car to say goodbye, Kat wanted to re-kindle the flirty spark they’d had earlier in the day and as he took her in his arms, she smiled coyly at him. “I like your life, Colton.”
“I’m glad. Everyone liked you.” He kissed her lightly and drew back too soon. “I think Bug was captiva
ted by you. Your pretty hair, sweet smile.”
“If this works out, could you see me here, being Bug’s mom? Eventually, I mean.”
His arms loosened the hug and a line appeared between his brows. “Well, you know that no one will ever take over from my wife or as Bug’s mom, even though she was just a baby when Darcy died.” A cloud had moved in to cover his face in grief, and Kat almost gasped.
“Not replace her, of course not, but I’d hope to be called Mom eventually, be the one she goes to when she falls down and scrapes her knee.”
Colton looked troubled. “I just don’t know if I could ask her to call you Mom, Kat. I want her to remember her real mother, always.”
“You’d expect me to live here with you, do all the mom things, have children with you, but you’d have her call me Kat?”
He shrugged. “We’d have to figure out something but I don’t want to dishonor Darcy’s memory. You know?”
Kat nodded but when she stepped into the waiting SUV, she was very worried about her relationship with this motherless family. She wanted to be Mom. Already Jaxie was being called “Mommy” by Crane’s kids, and she’d only known them four months. Jaxie had said they’d wanted to have a mommy and couldn’t wait to call her that. Not to compare herself with that situation but Kat didn’t want to be called by her name by a child she was thinking of as hers. Did Colton realize how much she’d give to the relationship and how mother-like she’d become? Maybe not, and maybe in time he’d see the merits of Bug calling her mom. Driving to the airport she thought about Colton and her relationship with him, but it always came back to the little girl. Come to think of it, he’d flinched when she called Jessica Lynn, ‘Bug’ earlier in the day. Checking in at the airport, Kat did not have the wonderful feeling that she’d had earlier, and she boarded her flight to New York with a slightly heavy heart, wondering if she and Colton would be able to work this out.
Pierce strolled towards her in front of the Metropolitan Museum of Art. He held out his arms and looked around as if to say ‘Look at all this. Don’t you love it?” God, he looked so handsome! Her desire for this man had to be curbed if she was going to make a rational decision about Pierce. “Hello Miss Kat,” he said hugging her.
They passed the afternoon, wandering arm in arm through the museum, talking art, then stopped for baguettes and coffee at a café down a side street in the Village, visiting galleries, laughing. Kat was quickly falling for this charismatic man but wasn’t sure if the feeling was mutual. With all the flirting and fun, Pierce never kissed her again, or said that he was falling for her, like some of the other men. She started to doubt his interest and when they finally ended up at his sister’s apartment building for dinner, she asked him in the elevator. “Do you like me?”
He looked her in the eyes. “Yes, of course I do.”
“What do you like about me because I’m not feeling the love.” Kat tried to not sound accusatory.
He looked stunned, then took a deep breath and stopped the elevator. The camera men had gone ahead to set up the shot of them leaving the elevator and they were finally alone. “I’m having trouble with the cameras in our faces all the time. I’m sorry if I haven’t told you. I guess I’m waiting to be alone with you.”
“That might not happen for a while.”
“Well, we’re alone now.” He took her face in his hands and kissed her. Deeply, sweetly. She sank into him and tried to not seem too needy, let him lead. When the alarm sounded for the elevator, he drew back, pressed the floor number and they continued up to the twelfth floor. As the door opened though, he dropped her hand suddenly and motioned for her to go first. The camera waited and followed them down the hall to the sister’s front door.
Inside, Kat had a strange feeling as she greeted Pierce’s stand offish sister and her husband. Something was wrong. They were behaving strangely, like she’d caught them at a bad moment. She shook hands with the couple but the absence of warmth or a hug was painfully apparent.
Pierce’s mother had been detained in traffic and would come later. When they stopped filming to discuss whether or not to wait, Pierce insisted they continue. “She’s a little flaky and might not even make it.” The producers exchanged looks, talked for a few minutes, and as things went from strange to worse, Kat knew she had to get Pierce alone to talk.
When the mother still hadn’t shown up by the end of a meal ordered from a local Indian takeout, Kat pulled away from the table and stood. “Thank you for having me in your home. And now, I think Pierce and I need alone time.” She grabbed her coat from a rack at the door and they left the apartment. Kat and Pierce walked side by side to the elevator until Pierce broke the silence. “Look, I’m sorry about my mother. I obviously should’ve invited my father instead.” He tried to get her to smile but she wasn’t having it. Kat didn’t want to confront him if he was an innocent in this strange family, but she needed answers. By the time they sat down in the deserted lobby on a vinyl couch with cameras arced around them, the questions were bursting to come out of her mouth.
“Your sister didn’t like me much. Why?”
He looked apologetic. “She’s quiet. Sorry. I’m the outgoing one in the family.” He smiled.
“What’s going on Pierce? What the hell are you hiding from me?” She stared hard at his face.
“What makes you think I’m hiding something?”
Answering a question with another question wouldn’t work. “Tell me, if you want to continue. Tell me what is going on?”
Pierce’s expression told her that he was going to come clean, and she silently prayed it wouldn’t affect their relationship. Like maybe his mother was a spy and the mission went longer than anticipated. “My sister really liked my last girlfriend and she wasn’t convinced that I could move on.”
“The roommate?”
He nodded. “They’re good friends.”
“And your mother?”
“Oh, who knows? She’s great and all but she really is busy. And a little flaky.” He ran his hand through his long blonde hair. “I think she didn’t come because she didn’t like the idea of me going on this show.”
So your family wasn’t supportive of this?
“Not really.” He looked at her with apologetic eyes. “I’m sorry to put you through tonight. You should’ve met some of my friends.”
“And your other sister?”
“She’s traveling. Not in town.” There was a long, awkward pause while he seemed to think then he took her hand and smiled. “I’m sorry about this.” His hand in his hair again. “Oh God, this is hard.” He looked around the lobby. “I’m sorry about a lot of things, Kat.”
“Like what?” She had a bad feeling that he was going to say something terrible and he’d be gone after this conversation.
“I’m mostly sorry that, although I really like you, I don’t feel as strongly as I should at this point.” His thumb rubbed her palm. “I’m not feeling it like you, and don’t know if I will.”
She pulled her hand back like it had been burned. “That’s the only honest thing you’ve said to me all day.” She stood and walked to the window to look out at the New York night. A light rain had begun to fall. It would’ve been romantic to go for a walk in the rain. But not now. “I think you should leave the show.” She didn’t turn around. Instead, she waited for him to take back what he’d said, explain that he was slow at letting himself love and still wanted to try to catch up with her feelings. That there was great potential because of their shared love of art. Instead she heard the tap of his shoes on the marble floor and then the cameramen scurrying around. Kat didn’t turn around, although she knew they’d want to see the tears in her eyes, get it all on camera. She stared out the window until the show’s SUV drove off with Pierce inside.
The producers were excited. She heard them talking amongst themselves, re-thinking what had just happened. Words like “so sudden,” “What just happened?” and “did you see that coming?” circulated the lobby until the elevator d
oor opened and Pierce’s sister came out, prepared to leave with a purse, wearing a coat. She looked stunned to see Kat standing there. Camera’s switched on and the crew got in position as Kat approached her.
“I told your brother to leave. He isn’t in love with me.”
“It’s for the best.” The sister looked like she was holding back a grin.
“Why do you say that?” Kat folded her arms across her chest. She hated this sister, anyhow.
The sister looked over to the cameras. “Are they on? I can’t say with them taping us.”
Kat motioned to turn off and the director of the show shook his head.
The sister shrugged. “Pierce isn’t over his last relationship.” She touched Kat’s arm on her way by and hurried out the door.
Kat sank to the couch and tears came to her eyes. She felt like she’d just witnessed a friend’s accidental death. “He’s gone,” she muttered to herself. The cameras continued to film as a producer fed her questions from behind the camera.
“How do you feel now?”
“I feel like I’ve been played for a fool. I feel used and stupid.” She let the tears fall, even though in three months the emotion spent on this moment would seem useless. “I feel like this hometown date took a very bad turn and crashed into a tree.”
She’d been waiting in a botanical park in downtown Atlanta for about five minutes when the SUV pulled up and Ben stepped out. He looked fresh, and gorgeous and the sight of him made Kat want to run and hug him, make all the hurt go away from the last few days. She wouldn’t confess that her heart hurt from Pierce. This was Ben’s day. She had to put the last two days behind her and give this wonderful man her full attention. Wearing faded blue jeans, just tight enough, and a Black t shirt, Ben looked good enough to eat. She’d seen him in suits plenty, but liked Ben’s look in plain old jeans. He moved like he’d spent loads of time on sport teams, shooting hoops, scoring goals, being loved by his coaches.
