31 Days of Winter

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31 Days of Winter Page 41

by C. J. Fallowfield


  ‘I’m fine, thank you.’

  ‘You didn’t call me yesterday.’

  ‘You made it quite clear you didn’t want calling.’

  ‘Do we have to have this conversation shouting through the glass?’

  ‘What’s there to say? You’ll apologise for withdrawing again, I’ll forgive you because I’m stupid. We’ll end up having ridiculously amazing sex again, you’ll hate yourself in the morning, then make me hate you, and we’re back at square one. It’s like Groundhog Day with you. Thanks, but I’ll pass.’

  ‘Ellie.’ I watched him run a hand through his hair.

  ‘What? You’re about to tell me that I don’t understand? Damn right I don’t. Thanks for the shopping, I’ll sort out the cash and put it through your door when you’re out this afternoon.’

  ‘I’d like to see you tonight.’

  ‘I don’t think that’s a good idea.’

  ‘I promise not to make any moves.’

  ‘You promised that before,’ I reminded him with a roll of my eyes.

  ‘You didn’t exactly try and stop me.’

  ‘So we both have shit control, all the more reason not to be around each other don’t you think?’

  ‘Ellie please, I’d like to talk to you in person. I’ll come by when I get back later.’

  ‘Fine, but I’m only agreeing because you’ll stick another log through the door if you don’t get your own way.’

  ‘Don’t leave your food out here,’ he sighed. ‘The sun’s out and it’s warm.’

  ‘I’ll come and get it in a minute.’

  ‘You’ll be ok on your own?’

  ‘I was fine yesterday, thank you.’ I watched as he let out another obvious sigh before rubbing his stubble, then turned and left. I felt proud that I’d stood my ground, but sad that I was about to spend another day without him. I quickly pulled on some clothes, ran down and got all of the shopping in before heading up to check on the airport status again. It was open, but there were no seats available on any flights before the one I already had. I searched for a five star spa hotel near the town we’d been to and the one at the top of the loch came up. I rang their number to ask if they had any rooms, but was told they were fully booked with it being Hogmanay. The Scots really celebrated New Year, they were renowned for it. I asked for the name of the pub as I couldn’t remember it and kicked myself when they told me that it was “The Stag” and gave me the number. A woman answered and told me they had no rooms either and that the local B&B was full too. Damn it, I was stuck with capricious man for another four days, like it or not. I sighed and rang the London estate agents to chase them up about Brooke having a key, and they apologised and said that their records showed that the owner had confirmed it was ok and that he would let me know, but she could collect it during working hours. I busied myself with my writing again, I was close to a finished first draft. If I wasn’t going to have sex, I was going to damn well write about it. But given my new found knowledge, I was going to have to redraft just how explosive it could actually be. I broke off at seven and headed down to make a chicken stir fry and heard a knock at the door.

  ‘It’s open,’ I yelled.

  ‘I give up with you,’ he sighed as he stepped inside.

  ‘Figured it was cheaper for you to simply open it like normal people.’

  ‘Is sarcasm going to be a theme of the rest of the evening?’

  ‘Would you like it to be? I’m pretty good at it.’

  ‘Not particularly, but I guess I deserve it.’

  ‘You do.’

  ‘What are you cooking?’

  ‘Chicken stir fry, I suppose you want some?’

  ‘No thanks, I’ve already eaten, it just smells better than my chicken Pot Noodle.’

  ‘Seriously, you have so much free time on your hands you need to take cookery classes,’ I advised as I plated up. I turned around to find him sitting at the island watching me, freshly shaved wearing a grey shirt with some black jeans. Damn him, looking all sexy when I was trying to stay cold.

  ‘I missed you last night, I hardly slept.’

  ‘You asked me to move out,’ I reminded him as I took a seat and started to eat, trying not to look at him.

  ‘I’m a complex guy, I told you this from the beginning.’

  ‘You did, it was my mistake thinking the nice guy I’d spent a couple of amazing days with was the real Dan. There again, I never did have great judgement in guys.’

  ‘I thought sarcasm wasn’t going to feature. Please don’t compare me to that shit you went out with and stop talking yourself down.’

  ‘So have you just come to apologise and woo me back into your bed again?’

  ‘Apologise, yes. Wooing, no. You’re right, we’re amazing together but once you leave we can never be anything more, it’s best we don’t make this any harder than it already will be when you go.’

  ‘Something we agree on. So was that all?’

  ‘Actually no, I … I sort of have two tickets to a New Year thing at The Stag tomorrow night and wondered if you’d come with me.’

  ‘You’ve come to tell me that we can’t be close, now you’re asking me on a date?’ I exclaimed, secretly pleased his ticket was for me and not someone else.

  ‘Not a date as such, just two friends going out to a party together. I don’t usually go to things like this, but you can’t be in Scotland for New Year and not experience it properly. Pete would pick us up and drop us off, but I warn you it would be a late night.’

  ‘I don’t have any formal evening wear.’

  ‘Formal wear? Who mentioned anything about formal wear? It’s at The Stag, not the hotel.’

  ‘Pete said it was a posh affair.’

  ‘Pete said? When were you talking to Pete?’ he frowned.

  ‘When he was fixing the door. He said you’d got two tickets to go and I wondered if you were going to ask me, as you hadn’t I figured you had some Scottish girl you had your eye on and were going to go with her.’

  ‘No, I got the ticket with the intention of taking you.’

  ‘You got it before you even met me. What’s that all about?’ I popped the last of my dinner in my mouth as he stared at me in horror.

  ‘Exactly how much did Pete share?’ he demanded.

  ‘Not as much as I’d of liked, don’t worry, I’m still no clearer on your afternoon activities or the reason for you becoming a virtual recluse.’

  ‘I’m a very private person, Ellie.’

  ‘He said that about your boss too,’ I nodded. Dan stood up quickly and ran a hand through his hair.

  ‘I have things to do, I need to go. Are we going tomorrow or what?’

  ‘Wow, tone down the charm Casanova, it’s a bit much.’

  ‘Tone down the unwanted sarcasm. Are you coming or not?’

  ‘More inappropriate talk.’

  ‘Ellie!’ he barked.

  ‘Fine, but I still don’t know the dress code.’

  ‘Wear that black knitted dress you wore on Christmas Day, that would be fine. See you tomorrow. Be ready for seven o’clock and I’ll come and get you, if you’re wearing stupid heels again I don’t want you breaking your ankle. Lock the door behind me, please.’

  ‘Yes, Sir!’ I responded to his retreating back. I could have sworn he stalled, his hands balled into fists and he let out a sexual growl, before striding out and shutting the door without looking back.

  ‘Yep, you definitely know how to pick them, Ellie Baxter,’ I nodded as I went and locked the door and left the key in, just in case. As much as I wanted to resist him, I knew if he strode in here with sex on his mind, I wouldn’t want to resist. I wondered if it was possible to have a love/hate relationship while having great sex, and concluded that was exactly what I already had with him. I tucked up in bed with a book and my iPad and sent Brooke an email.

  Just checking in. Minimal sightings of Dan today, but he did come to ask me to accompany him to the New Year party at the local pub tomorrow. It will be
nice to get out. The airport has reopened, but I can’t get an earlier flight so I’ll land about seven-thirty on Saturday night if you can bring Maisie to get me? Take out and champagne on me. Spoke to the agents today, take in some ID whenever you want and they’ll give you the key. I’m dreading saying goodbye to Dan, it’s going to hurt, but I can’t wait to start my new life in my new home with my new job and some fun nights out with my best friend. LY xx

  Day Twenty Seven

  Ellie

  The snow had nearly gone, so I went for a run in the morning, making it about halfway around the island before turning back. I put the bed linen in to wash and tumble dry as I did some cleaning, then spent the afternoon having a pamper session in the bathroom, prettying myself up for the party later. I shaved, painted my finger and toe nails in a sparkling gold and used the straighteners on my hair to leave it sleek and shiny. I put on some minimal face coverage and did my lashes long and dark with black lined rims and a pale gold shadow that showed off the gold flecks in my green eyes. I took my new maxi dress off the hanger, I’d purchased it for Zac’s birthday, but figured it was perfect for a New Year party. It hung on me perfectly, the halter neck showing off my toned arms and sculpted shoulder blades, and the slit up the side my shapely calf and thigh.

  I pulled on my gold high heeled sandals and did a twirl in the mirror. I was over six foot tall with them on. As I looked at myself I nodded, Brooke was right, I needed to go out when we got home, I was attractive, I shouldn’t have any problem garnering attention. The more guys I dated, the more likely I was to find one I sparked with, like I had with Dan. I sprayed a touch of perfume and heard a knock at the door. I carefully headed down the stairs and froze at the bottom as I looked up at the front door. I’d left the light on and Dan was standing facing the loch, his hands tucked into a pair of dark indigo jeans, which showed off his muscular thighs and that seriously pert backside. He had on a pair of brown leather brogues, a black jacket and had topped it off with a checked grey flat cap. As I walked to the door he turned around for me to see he was wearing a tucked in white shirt, black waistcoat and a thin black tie as well, the top button of his shirt undone. I gulped. He looked seriously sexy, but I was also surprised, this was a stylish hip look that I saw on guys in the city. I wouldn’t have put Dan down for this. I thought he’d be in jeans and boots with a checked lumberjack shirt. I unlocked the door and opened it.

  ‘Hi,’ I whispered breathlessly, as I tried to control my reaction to seeing him look so good and smelling him. He had on some aftershave that just enhanced his natural scent. Lynx needed to bottle it and call it “Ejaculations on Tap” as women would rush any guy wearing that and happily seduce him.

  ‘Hi,’ he replied as his eyes and nostrils flared as he looked me up and down. I noticed his jeans rapidly expanding. Damn it, he had an erection and that made my nipples peak, which he spotted immediately. ‘You’re cold, take my jacket,’ he advised as he shrugged it off and put it around my shoulders, standing far too close to me as he did it.

  ‘You’ll be cold though,’ I objected as I had to stop myself from leaning forward a fraction and kissing him.

  ‘I’ll be fine. You look stunning, Ellie.’

  ‘Thank you. You’ve surprised me, you look … so stylish.’

  ‘I told you I’m not just some hill billy,’ he responded with a frown.

  ‘I never said you were, you’d look good in anything, but this look is very now in the city.’

  ‘Maybe I’m the style setter and they take their cues from me. Checked flannel shirts will be all the rage next season in London.’

  ‘Maybe so,’ I laughed. He placed his hand in the small of my back making me hitch my breath, and steered me out onto the decking as he locked up for me and pocketed the key.

  ‘I think hopping onto my hip or around my waist isn’t going to work with that outfit.’

  ‘I’ll walk. I can walk, you know.’

  ‘I know that, but you might want to dance tonight without a sprained ankle,’ he advised as he bent down. Before I had a chance to object he’d swept me up into his arms and started to walk.

  ‘Dan,’ I protested as I tried to control my breathing.

  ‘Don’t start,’ he sighed as he looked down at me. ‘Can we just have a fun night? I’d like to remember tonight as a good night.’

  ‘Me too,’ I nodded. ‘What’s that noise?’

  ‘I persuaded Pete to send someone with the boat to save us taking the bus. They stop so many times and I’d like to have a drink and not worry about steering my boat back across.’

  ‘You have some serious pull around here,’ I suggested as I looked up at his strong jaw. He smiled and shrugged.

  ‘So are you looking forward to going home on Monday and seeing your new house?’

  ‘It will be nice to start my new life, yes,’ I nodded, not correcting him that I was leaving on Saturday. We remained silent as he headed towards the jetty, then I heard him sigh heavily.

  ‘I’m really going to miss you.’

  ‘I’ll miss you, too.’

  ‘You will? Even with my fluctuating moods?’

  ‘Even with those, because happy Dan is an amazing Dan, someone anyone could, l … like,’ I corrected myself from saying the word “love” at the last second.

  ‘But not my alter ego Stan?’ he looked down at me with a raised brow.

  ‘No, Stan really isn’t much fun to be around, try to keep him under wraps when I’m gone.’

  ‘I’ll try,’ he nodded. He went to say something else, but frowned and shook his head. I heard the sound of wood creaking and stiffened up.

  ‘O God, don’t carry me on the jetty, what if you fall?’

  ‘I won’t, but if you feel safer I’ll set you down as long as you hold my hand just in case, ok?’

  ‘Ok,’ I nodded. I felt sick as I stood next to him and looked at the dark water below us and tucked up closer to him as he weaved his fingers around mine and we watched the boat approaching. It wasn’t the large boat that had broken the ice the other day, but a smaller one with a small indoor section. It pulled up alongside and Dan gently led me to where it had tied up. I screamed as I felt myself being tipped backwards as Dan lifted me up again. ‘You could have warned me,’ I gasped as I thumped his shoulder.

  ‘Sorry. Here Conn, take her for me will you, just make sure you don’t have grease on your hands to ruin her dress or I’ll never hear the end of it.’

  ‘Aye Dan, no problem.’

  ‘I feel like a piece of cargo,’ I grumbled as I was handed from man to man then set down in the boat.

  ‘Precious cargo, lassie,’ smiled Conn with a nod. ‘Dan’s a wee bit particular when he wants things done.’

  ‘Yes, thanks, Conn, Miss Baxter doesn’t need to hear about all of my traits, thank you,’ he replied as he cast off the ropes and effortlessly jumped into the boat. ‘Come indoors, you’ll be warmer and it will stop you panicking about the water.’

  ‘Thanks,’ I smiled, surprised when he took my hand again in front of his friend. He took me to sit down in the small cabin and I went to remove my hand from his, the energy flowing between us was so distracting, but he simply held it even tighter. ‘I thought we were going just as friends, friends don’t link fingers when they hold hands,’ I whispered.

  ‘We are going as just friends, but that doesn’t mean I want to sit and watch you with anyone else, by holding hands like this everyone will know that you’re off limits.’

  ‘O my God, you’re unbelievable,’ I gasped as I scowled at him. ‘So you don’t want me, but you don’t want anyone else to have me?’

  ‘It’s not that I don’t want you Ellie, but no, I don’t want anyone else to have you.’

  ‘This time next week you’ll have no idea who’s “having” me, Dan, so you won’t care.’

  ‘I’ll care, I just won’t have to see it.’

  ‘So what if I meet someone I really like tonight? I’m single, maybe I’m up for a night of passionate
sex with a stranger.’

  ‘You won’t, not when the memory of how good I was is still fresh in your mind.’

  ‘Wow, and the award for cockiness of 2013 goes to you. I’m changing your name to a double barrelled one. Dan Complex Arrogant.’

  ‘I notice you’re not denying the fact that I was amazing.’

  ‘Well I’m pretty inexperienced aren’t I, it was a pretty low benchmark for you to exceed,’ I bit back.

  ‘You’re seriously telling me that you think sex gets better than that?’ he exclaimed as he studied my face. ‘I’m very experienced, maybe not lately, but I have history and I’m telling you that’s as good as it gets, Ellie. When you’re enjoying your new life and picking up guys back in London, you’ll always be comparing them to our few nights together.’

  ‘And I’ll always remember how none of them took cockiness to your levels or had secret lives they refused to tell me about or treated me like crap the next morning.’ I yanked my hand really quickly out of his and stood up and moved to the other side of the cabin and glared at him. What was most annoying was that I knew he was right, I had a feeling I was never going to have sex as amazing as it had been with him, no one was going to compare.

  ‘Please don’t scowl like that, you look even hotter,’ he sighed as he grasped an obvious erection in his jeans. I silently cursed my body for automatically reacting. I felt my nipples straining against my jade lace bra and my inside lubricating in readiness for him. I watched a smile of satisfaction spread across his face as he looked at my chest, so I grabbed his jacket and pulled it even tighter around me to stop his prying eyes.

  ‘I’m cold,’ I muttered. He just smirked, folded his arms across his chest and widened his thighs so I had to avert my eyes with a gulp as I saw the protrusion in his jeans. We stayed silent as Conn took us across the loch, up towards the village and I watched out of the window fascinated as the lights of the houses along the shoreline came into view. It was only my second time leaving the island in nearly four weeks. I was surprised at what a large community it was. The boat slowed and I smiled as it drew level with a smart decked area, festooned with coloured paper lanterns and twinkling fairy lights.

 

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