She looks up in consternation and observes softly, “It was so close.”
I give a gruff laugh; I know what she’s thinking. An inch over and it would have gone straight through my heart. A few broken ribs and a punctured lung seemed a small price to pay for my life. And for the life of a friend, the man who became a brother to me. I’d do it all over again for the same result. But I don’t want to dwell on the past; it’s the present that needs my attention. “I’m alive,” I tell her quietly. Nothing else matters.
Her hand continues to explore, she toys with my nipples and then glances up as if wanting assurance she’s doing the right thing. My gut clenches as the realisation hits me again that she’s a virgin. Perhaps not untouched, but I’m the first man she’s fondled voluntarily, and the first who’ll treat her with the love and respect she deserves. For a second, the responsibility of making this a good experience all but overwhelms me. Nonetheless, I’m determined what we do here today will erase more memories of her past. Then, when her hand moves down across my stomach following the thickening trail of hair leading down to my waistband of my jeans I forget everything but the need to be inside her. She inhales sharply and gets up the nerve to undo my belt, then quickly unfastens the button at my waistband as if she doesn’t want to pause and lose her courage. Holding the zip, she moves it down gently, as if afraid she might catch me, but I’ve not gone commando today, so there’s no need for concern. She copies my actions, sliding my jeans down my legs, falling to her knees to remove my shoes and socks, and lifting my feet until I’m free. She hesitates, throwing a glance at me as though asking for consent, then takes hold of my boxers and pulls them down.
And I’m free at last, my cock springing up ready and willing, almost reaching my navel. Distressed, she rears back, clearly startled and afraid of my size.
“Jon, I…”
Raising my hand gently to her cheek, I try to reassure her. “We’ll fit, sweetheart. There’s no need to be worried. We’ll go at your pace, as slow as you want. And you know how to stop it if it gets too much.” She locks eyes with mine for a moment and then remembers to breathe again. “Touch me,” I instruct, remembering that her abductors kept her blindfolded, so she’s probably never seen a cock in the flesh before, and even then it was used as an instrument of pain. Understanding why she’s nervous, I decide to give her time to familiarise herself with my body, knowing I’m well endowed, larger than average in length and girth.
After casting me another nervous glance, she tentatively reaches out her hand and fondles my cock which jumps at her touch, and she backs away as if faced with an untamed animal, something not too far from the truth at the moment. I grit my teeth, forcing myself to hold back the commands which come naturally to me, allowing her to take this at her pace. Almost immediately she returns and tries to wrap her hand around me. Her fingers don’t quite meet, but she grasps me and gently strokes from head to root. I stand straight, sucking in my stomach as her untutored touch isn’t far off making me lose control, and triggering another few drops of pre-cum to ooze out. I clench my fists at my sides. I’ve had many women pet my dick, but never one who’s moved me quite like this. Then, she leans forward, and her tongue comes out to lap at the salty drops glistening from the slit. My nails dig into my palms to stop myself exploding.
“You don’t have to,” I tell her gruffly, proud that I’m still able to speak.
“Can I?” She’s asking my fucking permission? Taking a second to glance down to check this is something she wants, rather than thinking it’s expected of her, but when I see her tongue come out to lick her lips in anticipation, my answer is to grasp her hair and pull her towards me. She opens her mouth and takes me in, her lips swirling around the head, tasting my next bout of uncontrollable pre-cum and licking down the seam. She can’t take me in very far, but she uses her hands as well. She massages my balls, then strokes up the shaft while gently sucking me in the whole time.
“Jesus, woman! Where did you learn that?” I’m on the verge of coming, so have to push her away.
Knowing she’s pleased me, she looks up with a satisfied grin on her face like the cat who’s got the cream. “From my research. I’ve written about it, but I’ve not put it into practice before.” Her husky voice and playful answer almost do me in, and then she has to go and add, “Am I doing it right?”
I help her to her feet. “You’re definitely on the right track, honey. Your technique’s pretty fucking good.” Before she has time to think, I sweep her into my arms and carry her to the bed, dropping her in the middle with enough force that she bounces. It makes her laugh. Good. Sex should be fun. I come down on top off her, my mouth covering hers, letting her know the depth of my desire in my kiss. She responds eagerly; she’s as aroused as I am and as I taste myself on her lips I’m seconds away from exploding.
Breaking away, I put my weight on my arms, and shuffle down the bed slowly, taking my time to enjoy all that’s on offer, pausing to kiss her neck, then loitering to take another opportunity to enjoy her lovely breasts, teasing her nipples into even harder peaks with my teeth. She squirms beneath me. I trail my lips across her flat stomach, noticing how firm and fit she is. I try to touch and taste every part of her, noting for future reference where she’s ticklish or sensitive, learning her body and her responses. As I move lower, I rise so I’m kneeling and place my hands behind her thighs to pull up her legs and bend them at the knees, pushing them open, exposing her completely.
Her muscles tighten, and a fearful squeak escapes her lips, so slowly I stroke her inner thighs until she releases her tension again.
“Colour, Mia?”
She takes a second to respond, and then says hesitantly, “Greeeeen.”
I’ll take that as a Yellow, and stay vigilant to her reactions. Fuck! She’s so wet, it’s soaking through the duvet cover, her juices coating her in a shiny sheen. Like petals her labia surround her gorgeous cunt, it’s the prettiest I’ve ever seen, a slightly darker shade of dusky pink, but almost matching her nipples. Unable to resist I have to have a taste. With a quick glance to check she’s still on board with this, her chest rising and sinking as she pants with desire, not fear, I lower my head and my tongue sweeps from her clit to her opening. The taste of her goes straight to my brain, making me feel like an addict with his first taste of heroin, knowing from the sweet and salty tang I’ll never be able to get enough. She gives a surprised gasp as I start to lick in earnest, my tongue dipping inside her, and then swirling around her clit. She moans, and grabs at my head, but I’m relentless. She starts moving her hips, and I know she’s trying to get me exactly where she needs me, but I stop and wait. I lift my mouth away and mumble. “Be still.” Now I’m taking back control.
She obeys, and I start to give her what she wants again, but just as she starts to go rigid I move so my tongue sweeps into her opening knowing the longer her orgasm is held off, the better it will be. She groans incoherently pulling at my hair, and I chuckle into her sweet pussy. I’m determined to make this as amazing as I can, to make her forget her name, just who she is, and where she’s come from, and all of her past. Lifting my head again I put one finger gently to her opening, moving it around to get her used to the feeling. She’s still trying to push me down and seems unaware of what I’m doing. I put one finger inside her, and then a second. She stills and her body stiffens, but not with pleasure.
“Red!” she screams and struggles to get away. “RED! Get off me!”
I reel back in disgust with myself. I didn’t read the signs! Knowing I have just a split second to make this up to her, I force my feelings of inadequacy into the background.
Chapter 18
Mia
Seven years ago
I was beyond shame. The agony unbearable; hurting all over from their vicious beatings and the perverse activities they’d submitted me to. When they started again, mercifully I passed out.
I came round, a sharp agonising pain in my chest as I gasped air into my starved lungs.
I could barely move; there wasn’t one part of me that didn’t throb with pain.
“She’s no fucking fun anymore!”
As if to prove his words, the crueller of the two didn’t hesitate in giving me a sharp kick to my ribs Unable to register the new pain; I didn’t react.
“What we going to do with her?”
There was a pause while the one in charge decided. “Put her back where we found her. She’s no fucking use to us now.” I heard footsteps, clothes rustling, and then felt breath against my ear. “Hope you enjoyed yourself, bitch! Never forget it was me who taught you everything.”
Present day
Jon’s making me feel so good. I try to writhe, but he won’t let me and I quickly get the message. He’s in charge and wants me to stay still. I’m so close to coming, so try to force myself not to move, understanding he won’t continue until I obey his unspoken command. He starts pleasuring me again, and I’m almost there, reaching for that elusive high...
But then he moves his fingers there, inside me, touching where only my rapists had been before. Instantly I’m transported back in time, and Jon disappears, and it’s one of my abusers probing my private place, and he’s going to rape me!
My mouth opens, and I’m screaming and struggling to get away. “Red! RED! Get off me!”
The hand moves away immediately I speak, then strong arms enfold me, I push and shove, my legs trying to kick, wanting to escape but I’m unable to get loose.
“Shush. I’ve got you.” The voice is soft, carrying authority, “Be still, Mia.”
I’m lost in the past; I’m going to be hurt again.
“Mia, it’s me. I’m not going to hurt you.” As he reads my mind, homing in on my fears, his voice starts to break through the memories trapping me in the past. “Don’t panic, I’m with you.”
He stopped. Realising I’m not back in the dank building, grasping exactly who it is who’s holding me tight, my tension begins to ease away, and I start to calm. Gently he kisses my forehead, and then my cheeks, and then my lips. His mouth takes mine, so softly at first, his touch so tender, then, as I start to respond, his lips press down more forcefully, forcing mine open, and sweeping his tongue inside. It’s his taste that finally gets through to me, cutting through my fear. I’m with Jon, not back with my abusers.
As he continues to make love to my mouth, I return his kiss. Gradually I’m able to control and still my frantic efforts to escape, as visions of the past recede and then fade away. He relaxes his hold on me as my struggles lessen, and then lets me go completely, leaving me feeling bereft and cold. The last contact of our bodies is our lips, and then he breaks even that, pulling away from the kiss and sitting back on his haunches, watching me carefully, a look of distress on his face.
Tears start to trickle down my face, I look away unable to meet his eyes. “Oh my God, Jon, I’m so sorry.”
Reaching out a slightly shaky hand, he turns my face towards him. “Nothing to be sorry for,” he murmurs, “It’s my fault, Mia. I pushed you too far, too soon. I should have read you better; you shouldn’t have needed to use your safeword.” His posture is stiff, and he seems disappointed.
I feel so awkward that I’ve ruined everything. What happens now? Should I get up, dress? Stay? My hand's flutter, I don’t know what to do with them.
“Do you want to try this again?”
Looking up as I realise he’s asked me a question, and his tone of voice, so full of regret and, for the first time from him, confusion and uncertainty. I see him watching me, and know he doubts himself, concerned he took me too far, too fast. But it was me, my stupid mind that ruined this for us. All at once I know if I end this now, my abusers have won. Again. It takes all my courage, but tentatively, still unsure my stupid memories won’t get in the way, I nod.
After a second’s more scrutiny, he seems to shake off his indecisiveness. As if he’s carefully considering his every move, he touches my stomach, his hand gently trailing up and down. The sensation is soothing. He leans over and nuzzles my breasts, licking and sucking, while his fingers travel downwards. As if he’s thrown a switch there’s a fluttering in my womb as he arouses me all over again. He lifts his head.
“Look at me, Mia. Stay with me.” His tone is commanding. “Eyes on me. Keep watching me. Don’t think, feel.”
He toys with my clit, his thumb circling, then, faster than I could have thought; he quickly brings me back to the point of no return. His gaze locks with mine; I can’t look away, even if I had the inclination. He puts one finger inside me, and then another. All the time he’s taking me higher and higher. His fingers curl round, and he reaches that special spot inside. It’s him; it’s Jon. There’s no one else here. The feelings that start to overwhelm me keep me in the present, and then there’s no room for thought at all as I start to come fast and hard, screaming out his name, and then screaming it out again.
“That’s it, sweetheart, let it go. Come for me.”
His words push me over the edge, and I give my all to him as he stays with me, continuing the intimate caress until my muscles stop pulsating.
Now he’s moving over me, pushing my still quivering legs open, drawing up my knees and settling himself between them, not once taking his eyes away from mine. Keeping one hand in contact with me, he reaches the other to the bedside table and picks up a condom I hadn’t noticed him place there. I hear the rustle of a packet opening, and then I see him smooth a condom down his hard and throbbing cock. A twinge from my womb as the sight of him confidently handling his large dick enthrals me. I take a deep breath, preparing myself for what’s coming next. My body is still throbbing from the after effects of my tremendous orgasm; my limbs feel limp. Saying my safeword is the furthest thing from my mind.
When he starts to press into me, I have a moment of panic and close my eyes. “Eyes on me!” He’s watching my every reaction.
Opening them again, I recognise the man who’s vowed to protect me. The man who’s done nothing to hurt me. As my tense muscles relax, he takes advantage, thrusting forwards until he is part way in. I gasp, he’s so big. His width stretches me, the burn making me feel like I’m losing my virginity all over again. And in some ways I am. This is how it was meant to be. He stills, waiting for me to become accustomed to his size. With my eyes on his handsome face, his expression so caring, instead of wanting this to stop, I want more. With an unconscious movement, I squeeze my vaginal muscles.
“Fuck, Mia. That feels so good!”
His response sends a thrill through me. Experimentally I squeeze again, and it inspires him to move, slowly pulling out and back in again, all the time he’s continuing to monitor my reactions. It’s not enough. I want more. Reaching my hands behind him I grab his backside, pulling him into me. Encouraged, he thrusts, but with carefully controlled movement, moving further in with every pass until eventually he’s in to the hilt and touching my cervix. Then he pauses to let me become used to the unfamiliar sensation. Slowly the pain and burn disappear, and now the feeling’s so incredible I let out a loud moan.
He stays, and chuckles. “Tell me what you want.”
Why isn’t he moving? It takes me a few precious seconds to realise he’s asked me a question. “More,” I groan, greedily.
“More what?” There’s mirth in his voice; he knows exactly what he’s doing to me.
I take a breath; he wants me to be explicit. “I want you to fuck me,” I gasp out. The desperate dirty words that I’ve only used on paper before, come from my mouth with no filter, catches me by surprise. The declaration he’s torn from me incites him and he starts to drive into me, gently at first, then as I encourage him by my instinctive movements, speeds up until he’s pumping in and out fast. Then as another orgasm is building, when he hits my g-spot but I can’t quite get there, I need something more. Without me having to ask, he knows and reaches down to toy with my clit. Suddenly he pushes hard on top of it and I splinter apart, my internal muscles clutching at him. He hammers into me, once, tw
ice more then stills, gasps and roars out his completion, his body jerking as he empties himself inside me.
“Oh, Mia, Mia.” Tenderly he presses his forehead to mine, then rolls to his side, keeping his weight off me but pulling me close. We’re both out of breath, our lungs heaving in time. I feel a sense of rightness, coupled with euphoria. His gentle, caring lovemaking has finally laid my ghosts to rest.
“Fuck, Mia. That was fantastic.” His quietly spoken words sound genuine, making me gratified that it seems it was as good for him as it was for me. “I’m glad I was your first.”
“Not technically…”
“Yes, I was. They don’t count,” he states firmly. “They’re in the past. This is the first time you’ve made love. And I’m glad it was with me.”
I snuggle into him, breathing in his unique manly scent, coupled with the aroma of sex. His arms tighten around me, as though recognising I never want him to let go. It’s not just about sex or the amazing experience he’s given me; it’s the man himself. I want time with him; want to learn everything there is to know about him. So far he’s shown me he’s brave and caring. He’s a Dom, and he certainly knows what he’s doing in bed. And he cooks a mean breakfast! I want to get to know him, the man inside that handsome exterior; I want more from him than just his spectacular body. But what does he want from me? Is this just a one night stand?
Admitting my emotions are already involved, and that he already has the power to hurt me, I’m afraid to ask. But I’m also scared not to. I don’t want to go on making this into something it isn’t if he doesn’t feel it too. He’d told me he wanted me as his sub but did he mean just in the club? What were we together out in the real world? And did he just mean until the case was over?
Close Protection (Blood Brothers #2) Page 23
