by Iris Blobel
“So what does that mean?”
“I didn’t sleep with her, but Stevie knows about it and should I ever cross paths again with him, he’d most likely beat the crap out of me.”
She bit down hard on her lower lip. Her love for Jeremy had suddenly received a big dint. Hollie didn’t fully comprehend. How could he have not told her? She searched her brain. Did he lie or simply omit this part? She was so confused. Was that part of his different lifestyle in Hobart? But how could she not judge him? How could she look at Linda and pretend not to know? More importantly, how could she look at Stephen? Feeling achy, she pressed her hand against her forehead.
“Hollie?” he said quietly. “I’m sorry. I messed up, but I’m not perfect. It was wrong, I know that. All three of us have moved on, and there could be a hundred Lindas now, but I love you and only you.”
“Jeremy, I have to go. This is a lot to process at the moment.”
“Sweetheart, please don’t hang up. I love you and wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. That was me in the past.” His voice broke miserably.
The heaviness of their conversation centred in her chest. “I know it’s part of your past, and I have no right to judge you on this,” she whispered. “I think the part that hurts is you lied to me by pretending the reason to stay at home was something else. It hurts, because I’m currently in the same house with that woman—thanks to you, by the way.” She raked her hand through her hair. “Just give me some time to juggle this around my head a bit.”
“Twinkles, I love you. All I want is to have you back in my arms.”
Brushing away the tears on her cheeks, she said, “Me, too. This whole holiday is getting to me.”
“Is all okay between you and Davo?”
“All is fine. I just don’t know…you know…with Linda and such,” she responded in a near whisper, the tears still choking her voice.
“It’s in the past. She’s cool about it.”
She took a deep breath. “Wow. Cool isn’t a word I’d use in this situation. Anyway, I’ve got to go. I’ll talk to you again soon.”
After she hung up, she succumbed to the sob that shook her. Hollie missed her dad and Alex. She checked the clock, but didn’t have time to talk to Alex, so she sent a text saying how much she missed her and she’d be catching up with her at a later stage. She would have given anything to have her in Dublin.
“Hollie!”
“I’m on my way, Linda!” Hollie raced down the stairs. “Sorry, just wanted to get this text sent to my friend.”
She was looking forward to having the facial with Linda and didn’t want to be the reason for them to be late. Hollie tried to make an effort to dress up a tad, but the best she had found in her suitcase were some jeans and a T-shirt that she had bought at one of the tourist shops in Grafton Street. These’ll just have to do.
“What would we do without mobiles nowadays?” Linda smiled. “I guess you’re missing her by now.”
“Yeah, miss her heaps. Miss Dad, as well. Never thought three weeks could be so long.”
“You’ll be all right. I reckon you miss David. You two seem to be a grand team. You better check with Steve later on. I think he’s got your ticket and all the details.”
“Thanks. You’re lucky to have him. Thank you.”
Linda stopped, and her gaze lingered on Hollie for a moment. “Yes, I am.” Grabbing her keys, she added, “Jeremy and David are family, so no thanks needed. Jeremy was more than generous when we came to Sydney a few years back.”
Hollie couldn’t help but stare at her, trying hard to keep the vision of Linda in Jeremy’s arms out of her head. Jealousy rushed through her as she followed Linda to the car.
“Yes, he’s got a remarkably generous character,” she said softly. Why did it hurt Hollie so much if it was before she had met him?
****
The beauty salon was, indeed, just around the corner, and Hollie happily anticipated a bit of pampering.
As they stepped inside, Hollie said, “I know it’s not a nice thing to say, but I’m a little pleased your friend is sick. I’ve been looking forward to this since you invited me.”
Linda smiled. “I know what you mean.”
Hollie had had a facial a few years earlier, and even though she had loved it, she never got around to organising another one. She glanced around and liked the atmosphere straightaway. The interior’s dark brownish colours mixed with the cream-coloured carpet, and the walls were warm and comforting.
“Hollie, I’ll see you afterwards. Enjoy,” Linda said as she followed the beautician down the hall into a small room.
“I certainly will.” Hollie smiled. She sat and took one of the magazines. Out of the corner of her eye she saw someone coming in, but quickly turned her attention back to the magazine again. When she heard the woman talking, she couldn’t help but look up again and could only stare.
Holy crap. That’s her! Can’t be. Yes, it is.
Hollie’s thoughts went into overdrive. She had no idea what to do. For months she had been having these dreams, and now the person was standing right in front of her.
Is it really her?
Hollie’s hands became moist with sweat. She tried to think of what to do, but before she was able to do anything, her thoughts were interrupted.
“Hollie, would you like to come in now?” her beautician asked.
Hollie startled. “Oh, yes. Certainly.” In one fluid motion she stood up, checked her little name tag, and followed Emma, but not without having another peek at the woman at the reception, who now smiled at her.
“Sorry for that, but I reckon I know this woman,” she muttered hastily.
“Samantha?” Emma asked, surprised.
In the treatment room, Hollie made herself comfortable on the massage table, and as soon as Emma started massaging creams and lotions onto her face, the soft hands seemed to take away all her worries and the sweet sensation of relaxation washed over her. She enjoyed the scent of the oils, the hot face washer for the cleansing, and yet another cream. Even though she banished herself from thinking, Hollie suddenly remembered Emma’s words.
Eyes wide open, she asked, “What did you say her name was?”
Emma stilled. “Who?”
“Just before? The woman at the reception area.”
“That’s Samantha. She’s a regular here. Lovely person.”
Samantha, Hollie thought. Samantha as in Sam as in Sammy. Her thoughts wandered off again, and before she knew it, Emma had finished.
She stood up quickly. “Thank you so much. That was lovely!”
“Any time,” Emma smiled, and Hollie made her way to the front reception, where she found Linda.
“How was it?” Linda asked.
“Way too short,” Hollie said, sounding content. “That was wonderful. So relaxing. How about I treat you to a cup of tea now?”
“I’d love that. I’ll be right back. I’ll just arrange my next appointment.”
“No worries.”
Hollie gazed around to see whether she would see Sam again. And bingo! Sam came down the hall.
It had to be her!
She heard her talking to one of the girls and literally shuddered at the sound of the voice.
It took all her strength to walk towards Sam. Little sweat drops formed on her forehead, and her hands turned cold. She had no idea what she was doing and was angry with herself for not having thought this through earlier.
When she stood opposite Sam, Hollie simply stared at her. Her voice and confidence had left her.
“My apologies to hassle you, but the thing is…” She spoke in a suffocated whisper. “The thing is I’ve been searching for someone and you seem to be the one.”
Sam looked at her. “Excuse me?”
Hollie felt the stare, but then there was also a flicker in Sam’s eyes. There was something. Something she couldn’t pinpoint. She dug deep to find her confidence, to find her reason for being there, and focused on what she needed to say.
Her voice was unsteady, but she forced herself not to let this opportunity go by. “I know it sounds odd, but if you could give me just two minutes of your time. I’ve come all the way from Australia and—”
Sam’s eyes opened up wide. “Australia?”
“I understand it sounds strange—”
Sam glanced at her watch. “So you’re looking for someone, but you don’t know who?” she said with a chilly tone, spacing the words evenly.
Hollie drew in her lip. Ignore her and just leave. Just leave!
But she didn’t. “I think the new painting of the big, bright fruit basket in your kitchen doesn’t fit the decor,” Hollie heard herself saying as she remembered the last dream was set in the kitchen.
Sam stared blankly with her mouth open.
“How do you know about that painting?” Sam asked quietly, with a hint of anger in her voice.
“I seem to be dreaming about you.”
Sam’s eyebrows curved into a frown. “You do what?”
Hollie decided she didn’t like her. What’s with the arrogance?
She held her hands up and gestured for Sam’s patience. “I have these dreams—”
There was no patience, though. “How did you get into my house?” Sam interrupted her.
“I haven’t. I told you—”
“What else do you know about my house?”
Linda came closer and joined them. “Is everything okay, Hollie?”
“Yes. Sorry, Linda, I just feel I know this woman.”
Linda placed her hand on Hollie’s shoulder. “Do you want me to wait outside?”
“That’d be much appreciated.” She turned back to Sam and said, “I like the crystal vase in the bedroom.”
“Don’t tell me you’ve been in my bedroom, as well?” Sam asked in disbelief.
Hollie felt everyone’s stares on her back, and tried to quiet the conversation. With a low voice she said, “I haven’t! As I said—”
Sam retrieved her purse from her bag and was about to walk to the reception. “Not sure what you’re playing here, but it’s not funny, and if you don’t mind—”
Hollie touched her arm. “Give me five minutes, only five minutes. I know it’s absurd and—”
With a suspicious line at the corners of her mouth, Sam agreed. “I’m not sure why I’m doing this, but okay, you have five minutes.”
Hollie took a deep breath and rattled down all the information about her dreams, about how the woman gets upset, and the man just takes what he wants. She described the fireplace at the cottage and related the events of the dream in the kitchen. Sam stared. Her face turned pale.
“So you not only have somehow been to my house, but you’re also cheeky enough to accuse my husband of abusing me. You have talked to me for less than ten minutes, and you’re telling me you know me?”
“I know of the bruises you have between your legs. I know how he has sex with you, ignoring your displeasure. I know how you turn your head away from him, so you don’t have to look at him.”
Sam’s eyes conveyed the fury within her. “This is absolutely absurd.”
Hollie flinched at the tone of her voice. Her hands flopped to her side, and her voice drifted into a hushed whisper. “I honestly do dream of you. I wake up and my body aches. It’s my own personal nightmare, and you have no idea how it feels to be that helpless.”
She searched for some reaction in Sam’s eyes, but nothing. This was her last chance as Sam turned to leave.
“I know about your little teddy bear, the one you cuddle when you hide in pain in the walk-in robe. It’s a small brownish teddy bear, which lives in the bottom drawer underneath a pink and yellow baby blanket. It says Sammy on the front in red stitches.” Hollie was almost out of breath, because she had said the words rapidly so Sam wouldn’t leave. Now she stood and watched Sam intently.
Sam stopped in her tracks. As she slowly turned around, she blinked a couple of times. Hesitating, she measured Hollie for a moment. It gave Hollie an eerie feeling, but she knew she had to stand her ground if she wanted Sam to listen to her.
Sam, still not moving one inch, started to lose her self-control, and a tear slowly dropped onto her cheek. Finally she came closer, and Hollie noticed her own heart was beating at twice the normal rate.
“Nobody knows about the teddy bear. Nobody! And nobody has ever called me Sammy,” Sam said quietly but firmly. She stepped closer to Hollie. “I never, ever, want to see you again!” Sam whispered at her, turned again and this time left.
Closing her eyes, Hollie noticed her heart was pounding in her throat, while overwhelmed by what had just happened. She knew it was her. She knew it in her heart. Hollie had had the chance to get things right. She was so close and knew she was right. Sam was the one. But it had somehow slipped away—like sand through her fingers.
Gazing over at the receptionist, who gave her a pitiful smile, she made her way to the door and left the beauty salon with sunken shoulders.
Chapter Thirty-One
Hollie and Linda skipped the tea and headed straight back to Linda’s house. As Linda opened the front door to the house, she commented, “This is one strange story. Are you sure you’re okay?”
Hollie had filled Linda in with the basics of her true cause for being in Dublin. Now that she had seen Sam, she knew the dreams had a reason—but she couldn’t figure out what to do next. She was at a loss, and her head ached.
Hollie nodded. “Yes, I think I am. I just need to think things through, but then again, I’m not sure what I want or should do.”
Linda moved her hands up and down Hollie’s arm. “Cuppa?”
Hollie’s mouth curved into a smile. “That’d be much appreciated, thanks.”
Wanting a moment to herself, Hollie went upstairs and threw herself on the bed—upset and in tears. The feeling in her was so new and so uncontrollable, almost tearing her apart. She stared at the mobile and started to dial Jeremy’s number, but hung up again right away. Still sobbing, with loneliness weighing down on her, she decided to ring Alex, but nobody answered.
No wonder, it must be the middle of the night!
In the end, she dialled Davo’s number—no luck either. Probably surfing!
Third time lucky!
“Twinkles. You found her, you talked to her, and it’s time to let go and come back home,” Jeremy said after Hollie decided to call him and tell him what had happened earlier in the day.
“How can I come home if I haven’t solved the problem? I’ve got to find her and try again.”
“It seems she doesn’t want to talk to you.”
Frustration grew within her. “But you weren’t there. I know it’s her. I know I was right. There’s something about that teddy bear. I saw it in her eyes.”
“Listen. You have already spent two weeks finding her once. Are you prepared to do that again? What about your job?”
Hollie moved her hair out of her face. “You don’t understand. I have to find her again.”
“Listen to me, Hollie,” he said calmly.
“No, Jeremy. I’ve got to. I’m so close. I know I can make her listen to me.”
“What about your dad? He misses you a lot.”
Hollie closed her eyes, a stabbing pain inside nearly taking her breath. That hurt. It went straight into her heart. She missed him, too. Incredibly!
“That isn’t fair, Jeremy, and you know it,” Hollie said and hung up the phone. Instantly, she felt the blood draining from her face. “What have I just done?” she whispered. “I can’t believe I just hung up on Jeremy.”
I hung up on Jeremy! It kept going through her head.
Hollie rushed down the stairs. “Linda!”
“Yes?”
“Are you able to call me a taxi?” Hollie tried to catch her breath.
“Of course I can. Where are you heading?”
“I will be joining Davo at the coast. According to the timetable Stephen gave me the other day, there’s a bus leaving about noo
n and Davo can pick me up in Cork.”
Linda tilted her head to the side. “How about I give you a lift?”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Sam went home after she had called in sick again at work.
“Are you all right, Sam?” Phoebe asked.
“Yes. I’ve just got the flu, Phee. That’s it.”
“It’s just so not you to have so many days off.”
“I’m fine. Can’t I be sick for once?” Sam hung up. The events in the morning were still going through her head, and she had problems sorting them out, let alone understanding what had happened. She opened the door to the house and went straight upstairs.
She stopped short of the bedroom and turned around, then slowly went downstairs again to make herself a drink before she brought it back to her room. Hesitating for a moment, she took out her little teddy bear.
Sam took a sip of her drink and smiled at the bear. Her little faithful friend, who had been with her all her life. She tried to remember the conversation she had had with that strange woman.
How did she know about the teddy bear? No one knows, not even Claire, and especially not Padraic.
She placed her teddy bear back into the drawer underneath the blanket before returning back downstairs. Sam tried to focus on what Hollie had said.
It just didn’t make sense. The things she knew, the things she had said. Who was she and what did she want? Sam shook her head and stared at the fireplace for minutes without thinking about anything.
You have no idea how it feels to be that helpless. These words just went around and around in her mind.
Abruptly, she placed her drink on the table, grabbed her coat, and went back to the car. Her breath was shallow and her senses drugged. She had to see the girl again to find out how she knew all these things. A thought popped into her mind and her stomach was clenched tight.
Was she the one I dreamt of before Christmas? Sam hopped into the car and drove off without knowing where she was heading. Surprised and not really sure why and how, she stopped at the Dublin bus station half an hour later. Without thinking clearly, she turned off the engine and headed towards the departure hall.
