by Jenni Wilder
“Hmm…” I replied.
“Never have I ever seen the Statue of Liberty,” he said after a moment.
“Ooh, I did do that. My older brother’s wife is from New York, so when they got married the whole family flew out there, and we spent a couple of days being tourists.”
“What else did you see there?”
“Ooh…the typical stuff. The Empire State Building, Broadway, Times Square, Rockefeller Center.” I listed off the places.
“I played an exhibition game there once.”
“Oh?”
“It was a fundraiser for 9/11 families.”
“Oh… I hope you raised a lot of money.”
“Mm…” he replied in agreement.
I thought for a moment. “Never have I ever eaten sushi.”
Lincoln chuckled. “Nope, me neither.” He paused. “Well, actually I think I did try it once, but I wasn’t impressed. Kennedy loves the stuff, though.”
We continued our private game for a long while. Long enough that Lincoln had to add hot water to the tub to keep us warm. It was completely blissful. We laughed and shared details about our lives, learning a great deal about each other.
Eventually I sat forward and grabbed Lincoln’s foot that was resting on my thigh. I squeezed it and began massaging the muscles and tendons beneath the skin. Lincoln groan with appreciation.
“Never have I ever had sex,” I said quietly.
Lincoln opened his eyes and looked at me. “You know I have,” he said, and I nodded, looking down at the foot I was massaging. “What exactly are you asking, Jillian?”
“When was your first time?”
He sighed and leaned his head back. He was quiet for a moment before answering, “I was fifteen.”
“And?” I prompted him to continue.
“And nothing. She was a girl from school. We had sex. That was it,” he said nonchalantly.
“Was it her first time too?”
He snorted. “No. She had pretty much made her way through the whole hockey team before she got to me. But I was young and horny, and I didn’t care.”
“Oh. How many women have you been with?” I asked shyly, switching to massage his other foot. I was curious.
“Four,” Lincoln said simply.
“You’ve only slept with four women?”
“Are you surprised? I’m not sure if I should take that as a compliment or an insult,” he said, smirking at me.
I shrugged. “I just assumed the number would be higher.”
He grabbed my foot and pulled me across the tub to him, causing me to yelp as a tidal wave washed over my shoulders. Lincoln grinned big and leaned forward to kiss me. “None of them mattered before you, Princess. You are my future and the only thing that matters to me now.”
I shifted forward and folded my legs under me and sat in his lap, straddling his hips. “I love you,” I said seriously.
His face softened. “I love you too, Jillian.” He cupped my face with his hands and pulled my lips down to his, kissing me sweetly. “Best birthday ever,” he whispered as I hovered over his face, ours lips barely touching.
I smiled and kissed him again, threading my fingers through his hair. Lincoln’s passion intensified, and he deepened the kiss while running his hands down my shoulders and around my ribs. He stopped kissing me then and reached over to turn off the jets, causing the bubbles to dissipate and the water to settle.
Lincoln pushed me back slightly and raked his eyes over my body. My breasts bobbed at the waterline under my tank top and although I was overheated from the warm tub water, my nipples jutted out against the thin fabric. Lincoln’s hand moved from my ribs to the underside of my breast, and he circled his thumb over my sensitive nipple. “You are so sexy, baby. I could look at you all day.”
I bit my lip as Lincoln’s thumb sent tingles of pleasure through my body. I ground my hips into his and felt him harden through our shorts.
“Remember, if you want me to stop just tell me,” he reminded me as he untied the knot in my tank top and moved his hand to the neckline.
He locked eyes with me and I nodded. He must have seen the trust in my eyes because he smiled and pulled down the neckline of my tank top, stretching the fabric and exposing my breasts.
Lincoln groaned at the sight and moved his hands over them, cupping and squeezing. A brief surge of confidence shot through me, and I sat up, causing my chest to rise out of the water. My breasts were eye level with Lincoln, and he ran one hand around my back to pull me closer to him. He placed light kisses on one breast, slowly moving toward the center until he reached my nipple and drew it into his mouth.
I groaned as he sent spikes of pleasure through me and I pushed closer to him. “Oh, Lincoln. That feels amazing.”
I let my eyes close and my head loll back. Lincoln sucked at me harder before switching to the other breast. He licked at my nipple before lightly blowing on it. The contrast of his warm breath and the cold air around the tub made a shiver run through my body, and I gasped with pleasure. His hands returned to my chest, palming my breasts and rubbing my nipples.
My pleasure was increasing, and I felt a need between my legs. “Lincoln…” I whimpered. I rolled my hips involuntarily. Lincoln slowly slid one hand down my body over my tank top and moved it between my legs. He gently caressed me there as he moved his mouth back to my nipple. He took it between his lips and gently bit down. I cried out as my orgasm hit, and Lincoln wound an arm around me, holding my naked chest to his. I could feel the walls inside me spasming with pleasure, needing something more. I wanted to feel him inside me.
I opened my eyes and found him staring at up at me. I kissed him hard and ground my hips against him. My orgasm had brought me pleasure, but not satisfaction.
“Lincoln, I need you,” I whimpered against his lips.
“I need you too, baby.” He sounded desperate.
“No,” I said, pulling back from his face. “I need you inside me,” I said and moved my hips against him.
His eyes flew open and his hands dropped to my hips, stilling me. “No, baby. When we make love, I want to see you. All of you. Are you ready for that?”
“Never have I ever felt this way, Lincoln,” I admitted, and he smiled up at me. “You make me feel beautiful. I’m ashamed of my scars, but I want you so bad.”
“Oh God, baby. I want you too. But not here. If we do this, I want you in my bed.” It was more of a question than a statement. He was asking if I was sure I wanted him to see my nakedness and make love to him.
I sucked in my bottom lip and thought to yesterday morning when he lay naked on top of me in his bed. I wanted that again. Only I wanted to be right there with him, stripped bare. I wanted him to know me completely, scars and all. And I desperately hoped he would still find me desirable.
“I want you, Lincoln. I want you so bad. I just hope you still want me once you seen everything.”
“Oh, God. Princess. Don’t worry about that. I love you. I will always want you. You’re beautiful. You will always be beautiful to me.”
I kissed him deeply. How many times would I force him to prove himself before I accepted his love?
He pushed me back gently and stood up. “Meet me in the bedroom, once you are ready,” he said. I could see his hard bulge pushing against his shorts, and desire for him surged through me again. I pushed my legs together as I sat back and wet my lips. He smiled wickedly at me, but stepped out of the tub, ridding himself of his wet boxer briefs and giving me a full view of his bare behind. I crossed my arms over the lip of the tub and rested my chin on them, enjoying the view.
He grabbed a towel and began drying off before he noticed my attention. Smirking, he tossed the towel at the base of the tub and walked out of the bathroom. I admired his rolling muscles with every step he took. I sighed and sat back in the tub, pulling the plug to let the water out. Was I really going to do this? I wanted him so bad. I had to get over my fear of rejection. I reasoned with myself that if I never let
him close, I would lose him anyway.
Nodding to myself, I got out of the tub and peeled off my wet clothes. The sight of them laying on the floor made me smile, remembering how he had immediately solved my despair over wanting to go in the hot tub. He was such an amazing, considerate man and he loved me.
Looking at my naked body in the mirror, I let my hair down and took a deep calming breath. I sent up a little prayer, asking for courage. Lincoln would be the first person, other than my doctor to see my naked body since freshman year of college. But this time I would not be ashamed or embarrassed. I would be strong enough to not let my fears cripple me. Wrapping a towel around me under my arms, I made my way to the door and walked into the bedroom to face my fears and the man I loved.
Chapter Twenty
Lincoln was pacing on the far side of the bed with his hands on his hips, head down, lost in thought. He had put on long flannel pants, and when I walked into the room, he stopped pacing and looked at me.
Desire immediately flashed through his eyes at the sight of me standing in his bedroom covered only in a towel. “God, you’re beautiful. I can’t get over it,” he said as he walked over to me and cupped my face. “I want you so bad, baby. But this doesn’t have to be tonight.”
The ache between my legs flared back, stronger than before. “I need you, Lincoln. I need you so bad. Make love to me,” I pleaded.
Lincoln smiled. “Your wish is my command, Princess.”
He grabbed one of my hands as I held the towel up with the other and led me over to the side of the bed. I closed my eyes and took another calming breath. Lincoln ran his hand over my head and bent down to kiss me. I clutched at the towel at my chest trying to think of the best way to do this. My thoughts were going a mile a minute as we kissed. Would it be better to just drop the towel and let him see everything at once? Or should I slowly lower it, letting him take it in little by little? Or maybe I should let him decide, but he had said he wouldn’t push me and probably feared causing me to panic.
“You are thinking way too hard about this, Princess,” Lincoln said as he pulled away from me. “Maybe this would help.” He looped his thumbs into the waistband of his pajama pants and pushed them down, kicking them off and sending them flying across the floor. My mouth gapped open slightly and I sucked in a breath. He was still semi hard, waiting for me. I took a step toward him and ran my fingertips over his tight abdominal muscles. Again, the need to have him inside me flared through me.
“You are so sexy,” I told him as I ran my hand to the top of his thigh and then around to his butt, squeezing it. I stepped up and pushed my chest against his, wedging the towel between us. I moved my other hand to his hip and looked up at him. The force of our two bodies against each other was now the only thing holding the towel up.
“You are so beautiful. I can’t tell you enough,” he whispered and leaned down to kiss me. Our mouths moved against each other, and when he pushed his tongue into my mouth I whimpered and raised my arms, tangling my fingers in the hair at the back of his head.
I felt the towel slip and pool at my feet. We were now both naked, and Lincoln groaned loudly as he wrapped his arms around me and pushed me back on the bed. I felt him hard against my hip as he lay against me kissing me intensely. I felt my courage evaporate and I froze underneath him.
“Jillian?” His voice was thick with concern.
He hadn’t looked down yet and I was afraid for that moment. I took a few deep breaths with my eyes closed. “I’m scared, Lincoln. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Oh, God. Jillian. You’ll never lose me,” he said.
I felt him move off me and off the bed. Knowing he was looking down at me, seeing my scars for the first time, I kept my eyes closed and instinctually moved my hands to cover myself.
“Jillian. Look at me.”
I held my breath and opened my eyes. He was standing at the edge of the bed peering down at me with lust and love in his eyes. “You are so beautiful.”
Tears welled in my eyes, and I coughed out a strangled laugh. I truly never thought I would hear those words again once he saw my scars, and it was hard for me to believe him. Lincoln reached down and grasped my calf, pulling me to the edge of the bed. My knees bent, and my feet dangled off the bed. Lincoln moved between my legs and bent over me.
“I love you,” he told me as he looked down into my eyes. “I will love you forever,” he proclaimed and kissed me lightly on the lips before beginning to trail kisses down to my neck. He suckled the soft skin under my ear, and I whimpered at how good it felt.
He moved lower, kissing my skin as he explored my body. He kissed my collarbone, the swell of my breasts, the valley between my mounds, and when he reached the top of my scars he slowed, kissing the jagged lines and the stretched, warped skin. He ran his hand over the physical reminder of my pain. “So beautiful,” he said against my skin. He kissed my deformed belly button and grabbed my hips, pulling me closer to the edge of the bed. Sliding his hands down my thighs, he pushed my legs apart and knelt on the floor next to the bed between my legs.
I sat up, propping myself up with my elbows. I knew what he was going to do but it was still a shock as I watched him bury his face between my legs. I tipped my head back with a cry of pleasure and thrust my chest out. I bent my knees and moved my legs father apart, giving Lincoln better access to my core. He licked and sucked at me as he wrapped his arms under my thighs and rested his hands on my hips, keeping me still. I clutched at the bed sheet, and cried out as waves of pleasure shot through me. His tongue searched every fold, and when he pushed against the heart of my pleasure, I cried out.
“Yes! Lincoln! Oh, God. Right there!” I was so close to the edge. Lincoln hummed against my folds, and I lost it. Arching my back, I exploded against Lincoln’s mouth.
“Ahh!!” I cried as pleasure saturated through my whole body. Falling back on the bed, I committed this feeling to memory. I didn’t ever want to forget how good Lincoln had just made me feel.
When I opened my eyes, Lincoln was standing next to the bed watching me. He was fully erect and was holding a condom in his hand, but what captured my attention the most was the look in his eyes. He was staring at me as if he could never get enough.
“That was the hottest thing I have ever seen. You are so sexy, baby,” he told me as he crawled into bed and hovered over me. I shifted under him, up the bed, and Lincoln followed until we were lying properly on the bed and I had my head on his pillow. Lincoln’s face was directly above mine, and I reached up with my hands and caressed his face. He looked down at me with love and desire.
“I love you, Lincoln,” I told him.
“Are you sure you want to do this, Princess?”
“Are you?” I asked him, doubting myself.
“Oh, baby. I’ve never wanted anything more,” he said and kissed me hard on the mouth. I kissed him back with matched intensity and ran my hands over his muscular back, enjoying being able to touch and feel his naked body. I marveled at the idea that he could be enjoying my body as much as I enjoyed his. But there was no doubt he was enjoying this.
He broke our kiss as he moved his mouth to my neck. He suckled at my soft skin there and he groped at one of my breasts. He was sending shivers of pleasure through me again, only this time I wanted more. Despite my two previous bone-shatteringly good orgasms, I ached to have him inside me. “Baby, I need you,” I whispered into his ear causing Lincoln to go wild. He sucked harder on my neck and ran his hand from my breast down to my hip and back up, squeezing as he went.
“Oh, God. I need you too, Jillian. I can’t wait,” he said, almost apologetically. He rolled off me on to his back and opened the condom, sliding it onto himself quickly.
“Come here,” he said sitting up slightly and grabbing my knee to help guide me on top of him. I climbed on to him, straddling his hips and laid against him, my breasts flattening out against his chest. I could feel him hard against my inner thigh, waiting for me. His hands pushed against my ribs,
forcing me to sit up on him.
“Sit up, baby. I want to see you. All of you. I want to see all of you when I’m in you for the first time.” He gently rubbed the scars on my waist, and I bit my lip and nodded. Lincoln moved a hand to my hip and guided me back so I was hovering over his stiff shaft. He clasped his member in his other hand and slowly lowered me over it.
I gasped with wide eyes as I felt the head of his shaft enter me. I immediately stiffened and shut my eyes. “Jillian, look at me.” I opened my eyes and looked down at him. I could see anxiety clouding his desire. “Relax, baby,” he told me. “I need you to relax.”
I nodded and attempted relax my inner muscles. I slid slightly lower on him, and he groaned. My eyes flashed to his. This should feel good. I wanted this to feel good. And with that thought, I opened completely to him and lowered down farther on him.
“Ah!” I cried as pain and pleasure mixed within me as he broke through my virginity. It burned and he felt foreign inside me, but at the same time, it was amazing.
“Are you okay, baby?” he asked with concern. He had moved his hand to my hip and was now holding me there, waiting for me to be ready to move.
“Just give me a second,” I said in a breathy voice. I could feel my muscles adjusting to his hard member inside me, and I sank lower on him, taking him all the way in. I threw my head back, letting my long hair cascade down my spine. I arched my back and let my breasts jut out as I rocked my hips. Closing my eyes, I let the sensation wash over me.
“Uhh… I was wrong,” Lincoln said and my eyes snapped to his. “THIS is the hottest thing I have ever seen and it’s all mine.”
I had never felt anything like this before. For the first time in a long time, I felt complete. Desirable. Sexy, even. All because of this man I was currently impaled on. Fuck. I was going to make him feel good. But before I could move on him he trailed a hand from my hip to my apex where we were joined together. He slid two fingers against my sensitive folds, and I cried out and thrust my hips against him involuntarily, causing him to groan in return.
