Bernie seemed to understand what she was thinking and whisked her into the kitchen away from the boys.
“My husband’s quite a looker isn’t he?” she laughed. “I’ve been fighting off other women’s intentions towards him my whole adult life, luckily for me he’s definitely a one woman guy.”
“You’re a very good looking family.” Jen sighed without realising it.
“What a nice thing to say, thank you,” Bernie said with genuine pleasure in her voice.
Bernadette Baker was the source of her children’s wicked green eyes and Todd’s dark velvety hair. Although possibly it required a little help these days, but if so it wasn’t obvious. A similar height to Lily she looked to be in her early fifties and had a trim athletic figure in tight jeans and a slash neck top.
“We thought we’d just have a late picnic dinner on the tables out back, if that suits everybody?” Marshall boomed, bringing the ragtag posse of his children and their friends in behind him.
Jen marvelled at how easy she blended in amongst these people, as they all helped carry out bowls and plates and dishes chock full of delicious smelling food, this didn’t look like any casual picnic she’d ever seen.
When they were all seated Marshall stood with a beer in his hand, “I would just like to propose a toast celebrating all of us here together and my children, who make me so very proud every day. It’s been a very strange and painful time for all of us but it seems things are about to take a turn for the better with the help of some very new friends and some old very gay ones,” everybody laughed. “So thank you all for everything you are and everything you’ve done and for coming to spend some time with us, oh and also to my very hot wife for keeping all of our heads on straight – honey I think we did a pretty good job on our kids,” he said laughing.
There were a few hear hear’s and laughs before Bernie pulled her husband back to his seat, her face pink with happiness and embarrassment.
Jen caught Todd’s look opposite her, he rolled his eyes.
It was a fantastic evening, they all ate too much. Todd and Marsh, as Bernie called him, argued about the best way to build a fire before Sebastian made them both look like amateurs at it. More wine and beer was drunk and at some point Lily brought out a radio and people started coupling up and dancing.
Just as Todd’s gaze lit on her and he began making his way over, his dad made his move and without asking swept Jen into his arms and spun her feet off the grass with a laugh.
Laughing at his son’s petulant scowl, Marsh looked down and swaying her about said “How ya doing down there?”
“I’m doing ok thank you,” she was pleasantly tiddly.
“I just want to say in private that I really appreciate you being there for Lily,” he put up his hand when she tried to interrupt, “none of you were responsible for what happened, I’ve had a hard time convincing Todd of it but he’s not to blame and neither were you. Shit happens in life – granted it was some very serious shit, but it’s how you deal with it that matters.”
Jen let it sink in, his words echoing inside her skull for more than one reason.
“I’ve got to say thank you for looking out for Todd too. I saw what happened at the restaurant, you saved Todd’s life. We both know he could have killed that asshole, I would have too in his place, but you paid a pretty heavy price.” He lifted her cast hand and kissed her fingers in a gentlemanly fashion, and now she understood where Todd got his smooth moves from.
“That’s it I can’t take it anymore get your hands off my woman,” Todd mock growled, coming up behind her his breath sending shivers down her spine.
Marsh backed off laughing and gave her a little bow, but his eyes betrayed the solemn sincerity of what he felt.
“Wow I never thought I’d meet a man hotter than you,” Jen teased Todd as he pulled her close.
“Well you’ll just have to make do with me - he’s spoken for,” he gestured at his mom and dad starting to smooch it up across the way, then he bent his head and kissed her neck softly and whispered, “I know you don’t mean it anyway.”
“I don’t know – I figured something out just now,”
“Yeah what’s that?”
“How I didn’t recognise you from the Bravura ads. In those commercials you had a lot of blond streaks, seeing your dad must have twigged my memory,”
“I’m losing masculinity points by the day aren’t I? First you find out I used to wax, now the bleach, not my fault on this one honey, modelling agencies pay for your name and public profile and then set about trying to mould you into something else. In the name of full disclosure you should also know there was fake tan and baby oil involved.”
“No way!”
“’Fraid so, I would have done almost anything to bag that pay cheque.”
Jen pulled away and pretended to be repulsed for a second and then smiled,”Nah it’s no good, as much as I’d like to be freaked out by your metro-sexual past it’s not working, but just to be clear I still like you best as you are now.”
“Good,” he growled. Jen shivered as his breath tickled her then laughed when Sean and Seb swept past, she’d never seen gay men dancing together outside a Police Academy movie.
Todd pulled her in close and wrapped his arms tight around her upper back, he didn’t lean down to her merely pulled her against his chest, where she fit contentedly, her arms linked about his hips loosely.
Todd looked over to where Ben and Lily sat on the porch of her cabin they weren’t even close to touching in any way but they looked intimate somehow, maybe things were going to be ok.
The two of them were the last to call it a night. Jen stole a glance at her watch it was almost 1am and for the first time in her life, well outside of a hospital anyway, she was going to share a man’s bed.
At some point during the last few days Todd had bought her some very cosy fleece pyjamas, totally unsexy but she liked the fact that he was thinking of her comfort. When she came out of the bathroom wearing them he was already in the bed, his top half was naked, and if past form was anything to go by maybe his bottom half was too. He calmly watched her as she approached.
She didn’t say a word as she climbed in beside him, his eyes never left her and as soon as she tucked into his side his arms came around her.
“I’m glad you came out here with us, I love this place. It’s important to me that you love it too.”
She nodded, unsure what else to do.
“I don’t bring many people here, it’s kind of my little bolt hole that I like to keep mainly for family and close friends, I’ve only brought a girl out here once before,” when he saw Jen tense he realised his mistake, she wasn’t ready to think about him having a past.
“So what do we do now?” she said, trying to change the subject.
“I don’t know, right now the reasons I had for not seducing you immediately just don’t seem to hold up anymore, but at the same time it feels like it shouldn’t be just yet does that make sense?”
“If you need to ask me for guidance then you really are in trouble,” she smiled tightly.
“I think that what’s going on between us is serious hopefully and I’m nervous not to scare you off. This is about more than just sex and getting the deed done,” he leaned over and stroked a length of hair back behind her ear.
Jen rolled onto Todd’s front and looked into his eyes and without properly understanding why; she suddenly got really really angry. Without speaking she got back up and snatched a pillow off the bed and moved to go into the living room.
Todd jerked up, “Where are you going?” he said with some dismay.
“Well if you think I’m sleeping next to your stark naked body all night not knowing whether or when something is going to happen, you’ve got another think coming. I can’t wander round in limbo not having any clue what the next move is, I’m not a fly by the seat of my pants girl. I need you to tell me where I stand,” she pointed at him in furious frustration. “I don’t know whether I�
��m coming or going with you.”
She was fully aware she was being unreasonable, but first he’d intimated about his ex girlfriend presumably sleeping in this bed and no doubt knowing exactly what she was doing, then he had seriously pissed her off with his enforced gallantry. It made her feel like she wasn’t as desirable as he claimed otherwise he wouldn’t be worried about a few healed over bruises or a cast on her arm. Jeez it was going to be on her arm another 6 weeks possibly, there was no way she was going to play guessing games for that long.
“I’m sleeping on the couch,” she yelled
Todd made to get out of the bed to stop her and she fixed him with a glare, “no you step out of that bed naked I’m going to expect you to follow through on it all the way, you understand me?” She emphasized the last three words, the mantra they’d somehow adopted with each other.
“I’ve got boxers on.”
She thrust her chin up in the air and left him there anyway, “that’s no excuse,” she cursed surreptitiously under her breath and stomped off.
Todd sank back on the bed befuddled, not a feeling he was used to.
Jen threw herself on the couch and tugged the blanket hanging over the back onto her body. Tomorrow she was going to start taking some initiative.
****
Neither one of them slept much that night. Todd had just about fallen asleep as dawn broke and he awoke with a start to the sound of his bedroom door slamming open. As his eyes blinked into focus he registered Jen throwing off her pyjama’s, top first then bottoms, next thing she whisked her underwear off and scattered it to the four corners of the room, her bra landing perilously close to his ear.
Bending over more enticingly than she probably intended, she scooped the catering size pack of saran wrap out of her travel bag and slammed the door to the en suite bathroom.
Todd leapt out of bed and tried to get in the door behind her but she was too fast and the lock slammed home.
He banged on the door angrily, “What the fuck is the matter?”
“Go away Todd, I’m getting washed and I don’t need your help, I suggest you go use somebody else’s bathroom it’s going to take me a while because I’m washing my hair.”
“Don’t be ridiculous let me help you.”
“I’m done being an invalid Todd, you’re the only one round here who wants to treat me like one.”
The sound of the shower drowned out his cursed answer as she bundled up her arm to keep it dry and then struggled to get washed one handed gritting her teeth in grim determination.
Luckily he was nowhere to be seen when she’d finished in the bathroom and she got dressed quickly in clothes Sean had picked out for her, cute white shorts and a red and white checked sleeveless blouse.
She roughly towel dried her hair and picked up a brush and comb and set off to see where everybody was.
Jen knocked and entered the main cabin and found all the guys eating breakfast, the delicious smell of bacon and eggs scenting the air.
“Morning Jen, sleep well?” Ben asked
“Not particularly,” she replied giving Todd a sneaky glance, he was pretending to have a great fascination with his eggs. When she noticed Ben’s plate was empty she decided to wreak a little mischief.
“Is Lily not up yet?” Jen asked, “No, she and Bernie like to lie in when they come up here.” Marshall bent to give her a kiss on the cheek and placed a full plate in front of her. “I’m on cooking duties this morning so its man sized portions,” he joked.
Todd’s fingers were gripping his cutlery a little too tight at his dad’s easy familiarity with her, and Jen intended to push him a step further, “Ben would you mind combing my hair out for me, it’s a two handed job and I can’t quite manage it?”
Ben gave a nod towards Todd, but Jen ignored it, “Todd’s busy eating, you’re the only one that’s finished.”
Todd looked like he wanted to spit nails but Ben gamely shot her a knowing look and came to stand behind her while she tried to casually eat her eggs, picking up the bacon with her fingers.
Marshall looked fit to burst with laughter as he registered the game being played out and she gave a great show of enjoying the process of Ben gently brushing out her hair, sighing happily and tilting her head side to side as he untangled the thick wet curls.
Todd was stewing, he was well aware what she was up to, it didn’t make it any easier watching Ben’s crotch so close to the back of Jen’s head, her tipping that pretty neck up for him, smiling at him.
He growled silently to himself when Ben finally finished. Thank god for that, if that’s the way she wanted to play he had a few ideas himself!
****
Nobody seemed to have a plan set out for the day; Sean and Seb were sunning themselves laid out on towels on the dock. Ben and Lily were puttering up and down in a little rowboat. Marshall and Todd were nowhere to be seen and Jen had retreated to the porch swing of her cabin to work on her laptop. Truth is she was feeling a little bad about getting all bent out of shape and was missing Todd’s constant company. Jen had secretly grown a little addicted to it.
She heard a gentle cough - Bernie was there trying to get her attention without startling her.
“Hi, you’re out here on your own?”
Jen nodded.
“Can I join you for a while?”
“Of course,” said Jen lying through her teeth.
“I just wanted to make sure you were ok, being here with all of us - it can be a bit overwhelming?”
“I’m fine honestly, it’s a beautiful place to be,” she hesitated before admitting, “I’m quite surprised by how comfortable I do feel.”
“My son has a real knack for choosing property,” Bernie smiled, looking about her with pride.
“Todd found this place for you?”
“Todd bought this place, well it was a plot of land at the time and then he had the cabins built. He wanted some place we could all have holidays but not be too far from home, he fell in love with the views and the feel of the space, I think we all did.”
“Wow I’m starting to wonder when Todd will stop surprising me; surely he can’t have made so much money from boxing and a short stint at modelling?”
“He’s obviously not bothered to tell you just how good he was, at both! After that was all behind him he bought a couple of small investment properties. He’s very gifted at spotting potential, nurturing it and earning a return from it. And it’s not that he’s really interested in money or possessions, it just pleases him and he likes to spoil his family. This place is his dream, somewhere for his family and friends to spend time together, he’s so damn organised he already jokes about his plans to retire here one day!”
“I’m not the right person for somebody like Todd,” Jen startled herself and then stupid tears formed in her eye corners, Bernie leaned over and took her hand squeezing gently.
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t make him happy, I have a hard time getting myself through the day and I don’t want him to have to cope with that.”
“Maybe you just need to let Todd decide what’s right for him honey.”
“I feel stupid I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, he has my head in a funk all the time and then I was a total witch to him last night after you’d all gone to bed because I was so confused.”
“Do you know why?” Bernie smiled at her warmly.
“No,” Jen said cautiously.
“Sexual frustration pure and simple, it doesn’t just affect men you know.”
“Er ok, I’m not sure I’m ready to discuss this with you.”
“Definitely, listen Marsh was a boxer too when I first met him and he was a big believer in the whole abstaining while training for a big fight. I tell you the random arguments and four letter screaming matches we had on a regular basis turned the air blue.”
She smiled at Jen’s discomfort, “Todd thinks he’s doing the right thing by you, who knows maybe he is? I’m guessing you’ve not slept toget
her yet.”
Jen blushed crimson, “I can’t have this conversation with you; do you really want to talk about your son’s sex life?” she was astonished at Bernie’s candour.
“No, but he’s in his thirties and all he really wants to achieve anymore is to be someone’s husband and someone’s father. There’s not been a single genuine woman so far that has come close to the impact you’ve had, particularly in such a short time and if you’ve not even slept together yet then, well I can only imagine.” She trailed off the end of the sentence and lifted her arms in a shrug letting Jen come to her own conclusions.
The two sat for a minute in silence, Jen’s brain working overtime.
“Bernie do you think you could you help me with something personal? I’ve no-one else I can really ask.” Jen squirmed in her seat.
“Sure honey what?”
“I need to make an appointment with a doctor an ob-gyn I guess, there’s something I kind of need to sort out.”
Bernie smiled, “Leave it with me, I’ll try and get you in tomorrow, we’ll have a girlie road trip back home to Lexington if Lily’s up to it, there’s a brilliant ob-gyn there.”
Jen breathed out a sigh of relief and felt such a rush of affection for Bernie that the tears from earlier trickled out without warning, and she missed her own mom so much in that moment she couldn’t speak.
Bernie pulled her to her feet and gave her a fierce hug. “Thank you for being there for my daughter, and for what you did in the restaurant. Whatever happens or doesn’t with Todd, Marsh and I will always be here for you honey, always remember that please.” She kissed her on the forehead and grinned, “Now why don’t you go see if you can track Todd down while I make some calls.
Try the gym first it’s over there.” She gave her a little shove in the right direction.
Chapter 12
The gym was more like an outhouse set back among the trees, tucked out of sight. As Jen approached she wasn’t sure whether she was ready to talk to Todd yet but if it wasn’t him out here, then somebody was making one hell of a racket.
Jen made a quick recon round the building before coming across the open door. She glanced inside and stifled a gasp, tucking herself behind the door frame she peeked back inside.
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