“I…..am…the birthday girl….so I can do…whatevveerrr I want….and you….I….I mean I….want youuu to play.” Emily was insistent as she wrapped her arms around him and drug him towards the table’s opposing edge. She almost fell flat on her face as she returned to her appropriate side of the table, but caught her footing just in time. Carrie was now standing on that side, as her teammate prepared for pong battle. “Oh, there you are….how’d it go….with….uh….jockey boy?” Emily giggled loudly as she asked her friend the question.
“Shhh, you gotta be quiet….but…he said…well…” Carrie was certainly feeling the effects of the liquid poison herself as she lowered her voice to a whisper only Emily could hear.
“Noooo way!” Emily’s tone inclined rapidly and she wobbled slightly at the shock of knowing her friend might get laid that very night.
“Ladies, are we gonna start this game or what?” Kyle was getting antsy.
Everything from midway through that very game became fuzzy to Emily. It was difficult to say how many shots she took at Carrie’s house. She knew the number was certainly far more than she had intended. Either way, everything from that final game encouraging her to drink more, and the present moment, was a blur.
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2. THE ESCAPE
Clunk!
“Ow!” Renee struggled back onto her feet, rubbing her aching temple. She frequently rested upon this tree branch, trusting it to bear her weight. Today, as she attempted to climb it like so many times before, it faltered under her and snapped. The branch, still hung behind her as though waiting for its revenge. It came swiftly, for as she scrambled back to her feet, her skull met it with incredible force. It knocked her back onto the stone-hard ground surrounding the tree.
Despite the pain, she was reminded of all the reasons why this had become her favorite hiding place. Looking around, she felt the wind’s comforting embrace as it gently swept around her. Behind her, the beautifully opposing tree flailed its branches wildly in response. A victim to the wind’s command, its inner core creaked with distaste. Only the dirt surrounding her remained motionless, rigid, like an old sailor who had seen too many stormy nights.
Outside the ring of dirt rested a never-ending oasis of moist, sometimes comical, grass. The luscious greenery was now torturing her with thoughts of landing on it, rather than the gritty surface. Her nose was tickled by the delicate scent of new-born, spring flowers sporadically covering the landscape.
Though the natural wonders made the location breathtaking, the view surpassed them all. Its splendor was most appreciated from the oak’s peak, precisely where Renee had attempted to orient herself before her fall. The town rolled over the landscape like the notes of a symphony, each one somewhat dull, yet when combined, they created a beautiful sound that echoed across the vista.
Renee’s trance was broken by the sight of a woman approaching. She identified the figure immediately as her mother. The woman’s soft voice started out faint from a distance, dripping with a comical sarcasm. "Oh, Renee, when are you ever going to learn?"
Renee’s mother was not a complicated woman and her clothes demonstrated it. They consisted of a simple cream dress laced with pale, pink flowers, and a pair of light sandals. However, there was a casual elegance about her; maybe it was her smile. She always humbly denied it, but she had the most beautiful smile. Part of its marvel was her timing, as she always knew just when to display those pearly whites. This was often useful during her Tuesday ‘girls’ night,’ more commonly known as gossip night. Though she rarely engaged in the other women’s rumors, she always knew whether something was just silly or intently hurtful. Because of this ability, lying to her was impossible. It was something Renee had attempted and failed at many times.
As Renee finally pushed herself off the ground, she knew her mother wasn’t here because of another futile endeavor of deceit. No, today was Sunday and she knew exactly what that meant. It was another opportunity for her father to torture her with his weapon of choice; hymns. Renee’s mother, Merlot, was nearly by her side, and she felt the need to justify her delay. "I'm sorry mom, I saw you coming and I was trying to hurry but..."
"It’s ok, I’m just glad you didn’t break anything.” A light chuckle slipped from her delicate lips. Maintaining her demeanor, Merlot’s tone adopted a more solemn ring. “Come on though…you know how your father is about being late."
Rolling her eyes, Renee agreed. “Yeah, I know.” She then proceeded to follow her mother’s lead down the hill, away from her beloved spot. Glancing back, she felt as though she was leaving hope behind. She felt this way every time she walked away. The vision here always granted her far more faith in the possibility of a higher power than any church ever could.
Drawing her attention back to the front, Renee saw the dreaded old 1976 pick-up now less than fifteen feet away. Its once-red color displayed the many years of rain, sleet, and snow in the form of multiple rust patches. Her mother had once teased, calling them the liver spots of the truck world.
They had approached the ancient truck in silence and Renee hesitantly opened its door. She paused, clinging to the worn handle before slowly climbing in. She desperately wished she could somehow delay the torture slightly longer.
Once inside, she was drawn to the poor condition of its interior. She had seen it many times. The seats’ health seemed as poor as the smoker who had previously owned them. Burn marks combined with stains of different colors, three of which Renee easily identified as coffee, mustard and nail polish.
The door was closed by her mother who was reaching through the open window with a request. “Give me a hug.” This was not unusual in the slightest as her mother had always been the affectionate one in the family.
“Wait, you’re not coming with us?” Renee suddenly felt her heart sink. She dreaded church enough as it was. Riding with her father was another level of dread, but doing so without her mom as a buffer made the situation even worse.
“No, I’m going with the ladies group, remember?” As she said this, Merlot pointed down the hill to a white van. Unlike the pick-up, it was brand new. The women’s group had finally talked the church members into purchasing it with some of the tithes. They had offered to make it for everyone in the church, but the men stubbornly refused to ride in it. Instead, they stuck with their ugly old trucks, except for Mr. Garret who was the only one with a legitimate justification. After all, he had just purchased a brand new Cadillac Escalade. Who wouldn’t prefer that over a van?
“Don’t worry, I told them to park further down the hill so they wouldn’t find out about your spot up there.” She was trying to sound nice as she pointed back toward the oak they had just abandoned. Despite Merlot’s generally good intentions, like all mothers, she had a natural way of embarrassing Renee, and today was no exception. Right there, in front of her father and the ladies group, she pinched her cheek and said goodbye.
“Bye mom…” Renee eked out, humiliated. Turning toward her father as he started up the worn truck, she couldn't help wondering if Sam Kale would be at church today. His parents were almost always busy doing something else, but every once in a while they would manage to fit in an hour-long service. Reverend Johnson had never been happy about their absences, but he knew better than to address them about it. Mr. Kale had a very short temper and if anyone so much as mentioned his attendance, he would snap at them and refuse to attend church for months.
It had been three months exactly since Ms. Baize inquired about his missed services and Renee was expecting to see Sam any day now. Perhaps today is the day…I hope he’s there…
The truck was now in full motion, clunking along with an array of questionable, squeaking sounds. Renee knew she would have her answer about Sam soon enough.
Her father glanced at her, slyly, as though he was reading her thoughts. "I wonder if the Kales will be at service today."
"Who knows?" Dodging her father’s gaze, she looked out the open window to her right. She was av
oiding talking about this; she knew where her father was going.
"That Sam boy is a sinner, you know."
"We all are, dad!" Renee snapped.
"We were; but we've been forgiven." As her father made the harsh statement, she caught a glimpse of the questioning gaze he shot her. He then shifted his focus back to the road.
After a few seconds, she finally answered his unspoken question. "I think he’s been forgiven too."
"Really? Oh, you silly child." Her father chuckled with a maniacal sound that made Renee want to leap from the truck. Placing her hand on the truck’s handle, she contemplated the idea.
"He doesn’t obey the commandments."
She spun to face him. "Oh, and I suppose you always do!?!" Her face was now red with fury.
"Yes, as a matter of fact I do, at least when my foolish daughter doesn’t make me late for Sunday service." His face was stone hard as he maintained his focus on the road, but Renee heard the waver in his voice.
"I wasn’t talking about being late for service," she said in a half whisper. The truck had come to a temporary halt at a stop sign and Renee’s gaze ventured toward the field on her right. Her focus became locked on a playful, calico kitten bounding through the grass. His paws clawed at the air, then the ground. He seemed to be on a great adventure, free to travel wherever he pleased. If only I were that free… she dreamt of the day.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the coarse reality of her father’s voice. "Then what the heck are you talking about girl?" Her father eked out a chuckle but cut it short when he met Renee’s accusing stare.
I should’ve ridden with mom and the ladies group. She was severely regretting her decision to ride with her father, even more so as the drive crept on, especially since the truck’s cassette player had ceased functioning many years before. The result left them sitting in an increasingly awkward silence.
Renee had never been so happy to finally see the church’s weather-worn steeple. The small, white church had been built several years earlier. Its location was some distance from the rest of the town and was surrounded by an infamously terrifying forest. Despite the wooded area’s past, the council members had insisted on this rural location. As she heard the powerful singing that rang out from inside the church walls, she could understand why.
"...how sweet the sound that saved...” The words to the beloved hymn could have been heard from nearly a mile away, the choir singing it with a dedication Renee found silly.
Finally, the truck came to a stop in her father’s usual parking spot. Renee eagerly jumped out of the pickup without saying a word. As she did, she was instantaneously fixated on Sam Kale’s familiar face as he stood by the church doors. He had always been handsome, but this morning his face seemed aglow and his short dress slacks and blue button up, exaggerated the time since they’d last met. When he glanced her way, she felt her cheeks turn three shades of red. As they approached one another, Sam’s once childlike voice now rang with a new sound. The tone was stronger and manlier in nature. "Renee! I’m so glad to see you! Wow, you've certainly changed this past summer!"
"Yeah, so have you." Her mumble was barely audible, causing Sam to request a repeat. "O, um....I was just saying how nice it is to see you too." She geared her attention toward the ground, kicking around a small stone with her shoe, avoiding eye contact.
"Yes, well, I should probably go in now, my parents are waiting for me." Sam awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, clearly also nervous at seeing her again. He then began shuffling towards the church, keeping his attention on her.
She followed at an uncomfortably slow pace. "Yeah, I need to go in too, my mom is already here and my dad is..."
The happy, yet awkward, reunion was interrupted by the rough tone Renee’s father so easily maintained. "Hello Sam. The church members were beginning to wonder if you were ever coming back." His eyes were piercing, but Sam had never been one to accept intimidation.
The boy stopped dead in his tracks and faced him, standing mere feet from the chapel’s entrance. "I’m sure they were too caught up spreading the good news to even notice my lack of attendance." Without waiting for a response, Sam turned away and marched up the steps into the sanctuary.
With Sam just inside the church walls, Renee turned to her father, concurring with the boy’s reaction. "He's right, you know. There’s no reason for you to obsess over his attendance…." Feeling like they’d beaten her father at his own game, she followed Sam’s example and began marching up the steps. Sadly, her attempt failed terribly. As she reached her foot toward the third and final step, she missed and toppled head first through the open doors into the sanctuary. The hymn stopped, and all eyes turned to face her.
Her father stumbled up behind her and grabbed her arm, jerking Renee off the floor. "See, you were being prideful and pride cometh before the..." Her father had not even finished the sentence when Renee pulled free and bolted out the door. She flew past the church parking lot, ignoring the gaping mouths of the townsfolk. In her mind, she knew they must be judging her, but she did not care. Her body was in full control now. Her feet had developed a mind of their own and right now, they were leading the way. Her heart pounded in her chest as her pace quickened. Every step was drawing her further from that beaten old steeple. She pushed forward at an all-out sprinter’s pace. It did not matter where she was going, only that she was getting away. The wind rushed against her face, and for a moment, Renee felt both feet lift off the ground. She was flying. Truly flying into the unknown, leaving behind a life she longed to forget.
Before her mind could catch up, Renee’s body led her into the middle of the dreaded, Hackers’ Forest. It had been said that many children died in this area centuries before, and ever since then a mysterious, almost ghostly presence lurked there. Contemplating the horrific tales, her pace finally slowed to a walk and, catching her breath, she absorbed the realization of where she was.
"It’s just a name, they’re just stories….it doesn’t mean anything." Her now trembling knees and sweaty palms disagreed.
Snap!
She assumed the sound was a twig buckling under the weight of some creature, but what it was, she did not know. Her already pounding heart beat faster as she attempted to prepare for the worst. She held in her breath in an attempt to remain silent, and leaned her back against a nearby tree. Terror filled her as the micro seconds seemed to stretch on for an eternity.
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3. TAINTED PURITY
“Come on, baby….are you sure you wanna wait one more?” The young man’s voice faded in through a haze as he entered the room. As Emily opened her eyes, she was only half aware of anything that surrounded her. This was certainly not her best friend’s house. That much she was sure of. The man who had spoken sat down on the fluffy surface directly by her side. “Were you nodding off?” His voice was gentle, but it was apparent from the stench on his breath that Kyle indulged in more alcohol himself.
For several moments, Emily did not respond at all and instead just laid there, attempting to regain normal thought processes. During this time, Kyle just stared at her, his eyes weakly concealing the comical sarcasm he so loved. Emily ignored him, finally focusing on her surroundings, or attempting to focus. “Woah” was all she could gesture up in response.
“On second thought….maybe you’ve had one too mannany….I’ll get you some wata…” His words slurred with uncertainty; yet his body moved efficiently as he jumped off the over-sized bed and sauntered out of the room. Emily glanced around, still in a daze. She determined this was Kyle’s apartment by the family photos that so precisely decorated its pale walls. She had only been there on a few occasions previously. Kyle often insisted they go out to spend time together and have fun. He once admitted that it helped him deal with accepting Emily's terms. She understood his temptations and recognized she asked for quite a bit from him. Therefore, she respected that they generally spent time away from this private location.
Currently, the
re was no recollection of how they even made it from the crowded party to this secluded area. She assumed Kyle must have driven them there. I don’t remember him getting drunk though…
Scanning the bedroom, Emily got a unique perspective on it. After all, this was certainly the first time she was drunk in his bed. His room had a light, airy feel, except for the distinct stench of alcohol. It was now Emily saw a bottle of rum lying empty beside the bed, the remaining contents spilling onto the pure white carpet. Aw….he must’ve waited till we got back safely to enjoy…..how sweet…
Continuing her observation of this strange, yet somewhat familiar room, Emily noticed a certificate of some form hanging on the wall. “Whaa? I didn’t know….he….has gotten….a degree…” Emily’s curiosity got the best of her and she decided to investigate further. This proved to be far more of a challenge than she expected. She managed to prop herself up on the bed. Her head spun and ached, but she managed to turn her legs from their prostrate position to the edge of the bed.
Just then, she heard the distant voice of her boyfriend calling from the kitchen. Is that where the kitchen is? Emily was lost. “Damn, we sure do have a lot of alcohol in here to celebrate the rest of your birthday tomorrow!” His excitement was followed by a series of chuckles, then an “Oh shit” trailed by even more laughter.
Still completely incoherent, yet trying to show concern for her boyfriend, Emily managed a simple response. “Whaaa happened?”
Wait….oh duh, it’s my birthday…..finally 18…soon enough I will be free at last! As the thought of an almost intangible freedom slipped through her mind, Emily attempted to plant her feet on the ground. Unfortunately, she forgot about the empty bottle beside the bed. Her foot landed directly on top of it and her already questionable balance gave way completely. Whoosh! Before she knew what had happened, Emily was down.
R.E.M.: The Hidden World Page 2