The cardinal seemed to be growing impatience, flapping one of his wings in an overly insistent wave. “Okay, okay, I’m coming.” Renee continued onward following her winged guide and reinitiating her rant. “You know as bad as this all is….as long as I…well we…can find Sam, I won’t regret my choice to run away. You see my father….well, he’s a total jerk. Ah, it’s nice to say that out loud.” Renee took a breath at the word; it was somehow enthralling to say. “Jerk, jerk, jerk. Ha! You see, all my father really cares about is his rules. Don’t do this, Renee. How dare you speak like that, Renee. You got a B in class, Renee? It’s like anything less than perfection isn’t good enough for him. Oh, and you don’t even want me to imitate one of his rants about sinning. I mean my goodness, you would think God would be ok with me having a little fun, wouldn’t He? Surely…but not my dad, nope. I never get to watch the movies my friends watch ‘cause they’re all ‘evil’ and the same goes for their music too. Oh, and any kind of fairytale with a witch is completely off limits. I mean, seriously? I’m thirteen, not three. Sometimes I really feel like I’m living in a cage with him. It just makes me want to scream.
Then there’s my mom though. She is amazing…a little on the crazy side granted, but she has good reason to be. She’s had a tough life, but that’s another story. Despite it, though, she’s always sweet to me, always listens to what I have to say. Oh that’s the other thing about my father, he never listens. Ever. It’s like just because I’m a child, my opinion is worthless to him. He demands ridiculous levels of respect, but gives none in return. My mother’s only major flaw is following along with his decisions. I still haven’t figured out why….I guess it’s because she loves him.” Renee dropped her head at this and stared at the forest floor below her. Examining the dirt, she could not wrap her mind around how love was enough.
“Perhaps it’s ‘cause he pays the bills….as he so regularly points out. Some day you’ll understand, Renee. When you have bills of your own….but I think he’s wrong. I mean I’ll admit he’s a hard worker; he does leave super early every day to go work, but so what? Does that completely justify the way he treats me? Like I’m not even a human being….just ‘cause I’m young. What do you think, little guy?” Renee looked back up at her winged friend who was expressing the same look of sadness as before. Renee could not help but feel like she was missing something here.
They proceeded onward in silence for quite awhile longer. Renee’s mind kept running in circles on the subject. No matter how she looked at it though, she could not see how her father justified his treatment of her. At the same time, she had to acknowledge things could be worse. Her father never beat her. He was not a drunk like Mr. Hillsby. Still, he did treat her like a mindless zombie and had been cramming the Bible down her throat for years. Renee’s thoughts seemed to be trapped in an unending cycle.
Finally, a more practical need arose, breaking the circle of thought. Renee’s stomach grumbled loudly, begging for nutrition. “So….um… little guy, I’m getting really hungry and tired. I really hope we’re close to where you’re taking me.” In addition to the pain in her stomach, Renee’s feet were truly starting to have a mind of their own and the screaming message they were conveying at this point was not a pleasant one.
It seemed the small bird understood her. As though in response, he stopped on a nearby branch and remained there. Taking advantage of the opportunity to pause, Renee began scanning her surroundings in more detail. She identified a massive rock formation up ahead. In the center, rested a massive boulder. The thing was at least two stories tall. Beyond it, nothing stood out. The trees continued on all around them and there was absolutely no sign of human life.
Oh great! “Really little guy?” She was fond of calling him that, it seemed an appropriate title. However, this time instead of endearment, it was dripping with frustration. “You brought me to a giant rock, that’s it?!” She threw her arms in the air toward the boulder. The bird did not flinch from his resting place. “This is just great, just peachy!” Her annoyance was starting to develop further.
The bird began chirping excessively and flew over to something on the forest floor by the boulder. Renee’s hope was slightly on the rise. She was also suddenly more satisfied, feeling grateful to simply have a distraction from thoughts about her father. “What is it, little guy?” Her tone was clearly more light-hearted now.
In response, the cardinal grabbed at the item’s edge with tiny feet, barely revealing a corner section of cloth. Renee rushed toward him, curiosity overtaking her. Moving out of her way, the cardinal dropped the thing and returned to his previously chosen tree branch.
Picking up where he had left off, Renee grabbed what was now identifiable as the corner of a blanket. She pulled the rest of it up from under the layer of leaves and dirt which had initially disguised it so well. “A blanket? Do you actually expect me to stay…” Before she could finish the verbalized thought, Renee noticed something else.
There, lying amongst the dirt was a small, round object. It was a coin. To anyone else, this was nothing more than a pathetic trinket. “Sam!” Renee immediately recognized it. She could not contain her excitement as she plucked it from the ground. “He was here, he’s alive! We must find him!” Letting the blanket fall to its resting place, she grasped the coin and began scanning the almost night-fallen woods. The cardinal remained motionless. “Which way do I go?”
Still, her feathered friend did not move.
“Please, help me, this belonged to my friend I was telling you about, Sam. I have to find him!” Desperation was over-ruling all physical needs and Renee completely forgot how tired and hungry she was.
Motionless the bird stayed, his eyes still fixed her direction. Or is it the blanket he is staring at? Who cares about the stupid blanket! Renee was determined. She needed to find Sam. Completely clueless which way to go, she proceeded toward the left side of the boulder. Stupid bird! I don’t need his help anyway. She made it no more than three steps before the once feathered ally was hovering in front of her flapping his wings and chirping insistently.
“What is it now?!” Renee stopped in her tracks, far more irritated than before. The bird then flew back to the blanket, lifting the corner and continuing his panicky chirp. “Ugh!” Renee walked toward him, picking up the blanket and watched as the bird returned once again to his resting place. “What do you want from me?!”
Maybe there’s a clue here. Could he potentially be trying to tell me something about this blanket? The thought was enough to drive a more thorough investigation. She lifted the blanket completely up, flipped it over, examined the corners and found nothing. It was a plain, black blanket, nothing more. “Little guy, I’m really confused, this is nothing but a regular blanket.”
The cardinal remained still, only…..did he just wink? Though Renee could not clearly define the previous action, the feathered critter was now making a blatant motion with his eyes. He closed them for several seconds, then opened them, and stared straight at her. He repeated this pattern several times. “You seriously want me to sleep at a time like this?” As the words passed through her lips, followed by a massive yawn, Renee was instantly reminded of how exhausted she was. The bird let out a lovely whistle. He then ruffled his feathers, lifted one leg, and performed a one-eighty turn of his head, snuggling his face down into the feathers on his back.
I have to find Sam though. As suddenly as the thought ran through her head, Renee realized how truly alone she was. The darkened forest seemed far more terrifying without her feathered friend offering her a light-hearted distraction. Well I suppose the little guy did lead me to discover Sam’s coin….and it is really dark. Another massive yawn slipped through her lips, finalizing Renee’s decision. Giving in, she approached the blanket’s location, picked it up, and shook off the remaining leaves. She hesitantly leaned down into a seated position against the chilled boulder. Wrapping the blanket around her like a cocoon, Renee slowly closed her eyes.
Return to conten
ts
8. An Unlikely Guide
Emily followed Lucy past the two tents that had so precariously blocked her view. Beyond them stretched an incredible symphony of forest life. Tall trees overlooked it all; their branches reaching over them like a parents embrace. They intertwined with one another like the fingers of dance partners, frozen mid song in a moment of time.
Emily noticed Lucy looking back at her frequently as she led the way. The strange woman was almost reassuring herself the girl was still following. Emily smiled politely, guided by the odd woman’s leading steps.
I should run. The thought came out of nowhere. Emily felt her conscious sending her a warning signal. She knew the contemplation was an accurate one. After all, this woman was likely the one scheming about her fate in the tent.
Scanning the forest surrounding them, she wondered which direction she would go. Then a realization hit her. She was completely lost. Where can I go? At that same moment, her attention and ears were drawn ahead by the faintest musical tone. She immediately grew inquisitive about the source of the music. She knew curiosity this was bound to overtake her logical side.
Looking the direction of the noise, her eyes identified a perfectly cleared, gravel path. Branches overhung it in a perfect arch shape. Further beyond that, she could barely make out the outlining of a village. Well, my arm does need treatment. Emily knew the justification to continue was a weak one, but she needed know what was ahead. Her inquisitive nature demanded it.
The duo continued on in silence. Lucy intermittently looked back with a smile. Emily imagined her as a lion looking upon her prey. A cold shiver ran up her spine at the thought. As they approached closer to the path, Lucy finally broke the silence.
“Wait till you see the city.”
City? What a strange word to use for such an un-modernized town within the woods…
Emily’s perspective changed when they were only a block away. The music that so faintly played before was now almost blaring. It sounds like a party is going on. Emily felt excitement rushing through her. Over the past year, she finally started to emerge socially. This was mostly credited to Carrie who introduced her to all the wild possibilities alcohol could offer. Her birthday party was not her first rodeo.
In the last year, Emily spent more than one night crawling through her basement window, completely eluding her father’s judgmental opinions. Just a few weekends prior, Carrie came over for a ‘sleepover.’ When Emily attempted to follow her friend’s example and crawl through the window like numerous times before, she took a wrong step. A loud snapping sound indicated she broke a branch of her mother’s beloved shrubs. Both girls froze in place for seconds that seemed to stretch on for hours. Thankfully, no lights came on and Emily did not hear the roaring sound of her father’s yell. Relieved, both girls giggled and trampled into the night, fully prepared for the adventure awaiting them.
Oh Carrie…I wonder when I will see her again….or if…Before Emily’s mind could lead down that dark path of possibility, her eyes were enchanted by the sight in front of her. With a much better view of the city, she could now understand the words of Lucy. It was marvelous! There were mansions everywhere of all shapes, styles and sizes. The first that distinctly caught her attention was composed entirely of logs. It rested up ahead and to the right of their current position. The wooden structure had the elegance of a modern home and the class of a building far older. It towered over the trees surrounding it and was at least four stories tall. Large, lovely glass windows sporadically lined its sides and front; its structure jutting out in a variety of angles. “Wow!” Emily could not disguise her amazement as her jaw fell open.
“It certainly is incredible, isn’t it? Wait till you see the owner…” Lucy let out a loud chuckle and started approaching the house.
“That’s where the doctor lives?” Emily could not believe it. A million questions arose within her but she quieted them all; in this moment, curiosity was her sole guide. She was not about to allow logic to overrule her enjoyment, not this time. Instead, her eyes wandered across the incredible buildings, scanning each one individually.
The first structure on the left was composed almost entirely of glass. Its metal connecting beams were the only sign of any other material used. She could easily see directly into the home’s living room. A massive television stretched across the entire far wall. She could just make out the image of actors flashing across its screen. It was now she noticed long red hair flowing down from the back of the couch facing the television. The woman watching it was sitting alone. Emily did not see any other sign of life in the entire place.
Wow…does she have that place all to herself…As the thought crossed Emily’s mind, the woman stood up and turned to her right. Then she faced Emily’s direction and simply stood there with a blank expression for a long moment. Is she staring at me? The scene was almost eerie. Emily did not know how to react. Embarrassed for staring, she looked away, shifting her focus to the structure beyond the log cabin.
This one, though still large by normal standards, was far smaller than the other mansions surrounding it. It was also the most normal of the buildings. Its outer lining consisted of ordinary siding and it stood an average two stories high. The outside was completely white except for the navy blue shutters that outlined its windows. A porch wrapped all the way around its lower level and a lovely bench-like swing rested by its matching blue door. Further from its entrance, where forest trees had most likely rested before, was a perfect patch of green grass. The entire area was contained perfectly within the bounds of a white picket fence. Even though it was far more normal than the other constructed homes, it still seemed like something straight out of an old fashioned movie. Outside its isolated fence, Emily finally identified the source of the music she was hearing. Two large speakers rested atop of wooden poles there, not unlike telephone poles back home. Music blared out from them, but there was no one around actively listening. It was as though they were placed there for a party or some special occasion years before and no one ever bothered to flip the off switch. That’s odd….
Emily was drawn from her observations as they approached the massive log cabin’s door. It was now Lucy’s presence was once again apparent to Emily. The strange woman took a definitive step forward and knocked loudly three times. Emily watched and, as the handle turned, her stomach seemed to be doing back flips. Lucy’s comment earlier about the doctor certainly got her attention. Her anticipation to see the interior of the lovely structure was only overtaken by the eagerness to meet its owner. The door slowly creaked open. Emily could not believe her eyes.
Return to contents
9. ThE Doorway
After what felt like a mere instant, Renee opened her eyes, immediately blinded by the sun. She blinked several times, allowing her eyes to adjust to the overwhelming stream of light. She pushed off the raggedy blanket, nearly hitting her head on the boulder behind her. Still coming to, Renee now felt something cold and solid in her right hand….The coin! Sam! She forced her eyes completely open and scrambled to her feet, scanning the area for her cardinal friend.
The winged ally was still standing on the same branch, eyes open and fully alert as though he was patiently waiting for her to rouse. “Oh goodness, why didn’t you wake me?” Again, Renee consciously realized she was talking to a bird. What’s wrong with me?
Of course since she decided to run away from home nothing truly made sense. Renee wondered if this was perhaps her punishment for such a childish act. However, she was not about to let her mind go back to running circles. She needed to focus. Sam was still out there somewhere and she needed to find him. “So…which way now?” Renee felt prepared for whatever adventure may follow, so long as it led her to Sam.
The cardinal tilted his head, an almost comical twinkle in his eyes as though there was a secret he was not ready to share. “Well? Let’s get going. I must find Sam.”
The bird’s response came as a shock. From his small beak flowed a beautiful s
eries of whistles, almost musical in their tone. It was possibly the loveliest sound Renee ever heard. The sound echoed across the woods with the tone of a thousand voices connected into one single entity. Then, as suddenly as he started, the cardinal ceased and the only silence remained.
For a long moment, nothing moved, all the rustling of the forest seemed to cease entirely as though in respect. Renee wanted to express her growing frustration and impatience, but something told her to remain calm. She felt like a funeral procession was approaching; respect seemed demanded. Renee almost anticipated the playing of the national anthem would start any minute. What a silly thought….
Then, without any additional warning, the ground beneath her trembled slightly and then started to violently shake. The boulder behind her rocked wildly. Her entire body shifted with the motion. Danger filled the air. Renee’s instinct screamed she should run. Finally, her feet switched into auto pilot as she rushed away from the boulder towards safety. As she approached the tree where her feathered friend rested, she was in shock at his composed state. The bird was not flapping wildly or even moving from his branch at all. Instead, he remained perched there, ever calm and silent.
What’s happening? Before the thought transformed into a verbal question, the boulder began cracking and suddenly crumbled to dust. Renee was suddenly surrounded by a dusty fog. Coughing heavily, she tried to beat the unpleasant particles from her face. She could see nothing. The cloud of dirt entirely blocked her view. It was like a thick, intangible blanket was falling down over her. She blinked rapidly, rubbing her eyes as she did so, hoping for some version of clarity. Then, gradually, the fog cleared. The sight slowly revealed in front of her was one she could have never anticipated. It was truly incredible.
R.E.M.: The Hidden World Page 5
