by Beth Michele
One shoulder lifted in a shrug and he grinned. “I told you, I have that power.”
I laughed, examining his face before landing on his lips and remembering what they felt like moving against mine.
And wanting to revisit that memory.
As if he could read my thoughts, his tongue swept out to wet his full bottom lip. “Come home with me.”
Although everything inside me was screaming yes, all that came out was, “why?”
Sean swiveled in his seat until our knees touched, heat blistering up my spine at that single connection. “Because you want to.”
My eyes drifted from our legs to his smug grin. “That’s awfully presumptuous of you.”
He scratched at the stubble along his chin. “Am I wrong?”
“No.”
His hand lowered beneath the counter and lingered. “There’s one more reason…because I want you to.” He gripped my thigh and my dick pulsed against my zipper. “I really want you to.”
Thoughts of him dragging his tongue along my cock had me guzzling more beer and trying to maintain some form of willpower. It didn’t feel right going home with him after leaving Willow the way I did. I needed to talk to her first. His mouth resting above my ear brought me back when he whispered, “I wasn’t kidding earlier. I’m aching for you. My dick is hard…,” his lips grazed my lobe and I shivered, “for you.” Just when I thought he was about to back away so I could take a breath and adjust myself, he whispered, “I want to fuck your mouth again.”
Jesus.
“Sean,” I warned, but I had no idea what I was warning him against. To stop talking like that before I came in my fucking pants? Before I backed him against the wall and nailed him? Both sounded pretty great to me.
He moved then, but not far enough away that I couldn’t still smell his woodsy scent, feel the heat radiating from his body. Everything about him oozed this rugged sex appeal and I was surprised he didn’t have flocks of men and women chasing after him. Maybe he did, but for some reason he’d set his sights on me. Not that I was complaining.
“Does it bother you that you’re attracted to me?” he asked, bringing me out of the zone.
“Bother me? No. But I’ll admit that at first it more so stunned me. Or took me by surprise, I should say.” I spun in my seat, wanting to look at him full-on. “I actually like you, believe it or not. There’s something about you…” My voice trailed off and he beamed a smile in my direction. “While we’re on the subject, how did you get into the whole video thing anyway? To be honest, when I saw you were an engineer, I couldn’t put the two together.”
The stool creaked as he shifted and I offered him my rapt attention. “It started out as kind of a joke when I was in college. A friend of mine wanted to make a video to give to someone and I offered. I was…unhappy, and I needed something. A distraction from all the grief. And it made me feel good. Anyway, I enjoyed doing it and it just kind of stuck.” He lifted his beer, gesturing with a nod of his chin. “What about you? What do you do for work?”
“I’m a computer illustrator for a small animation company.”
His eyes went wide with interest. “You draw?”
“Yup.” I toyed with the napkin in front of me. “Since I was a kid. I started out drawing comic book characters and it morphed from there.”
He leaned his elbows on the counter and folded his arms. “That’s very cool. I sketch technical diagrams, although most of the time I use computer-aided software. But I enjoy the hand sketching the most,” he admitted, and I happened to glance at the time.
His expression dipped. “Do you have to get going?”
“No, looking at my watch is just habitual for me. I tend to be in meeting after meeting during the day and it’s become second nature.”
His lips tilted on a half-smile. “Gotcha.” He turned to look behind him then back to me. “Since you’re not going to come home with me,” he winked, “you want to shoot some pool?”
I checked my watch again. It was still pretty early and I wasn’t planning on going back to Willow’s tonight, so why not. “Sure,” I answered, and he rocked his head in the direction of the pool room. “Just don’t be surprised when I whip your ass.”
His responding laugh was a deep rumble. “Give it your best shot.”
A few people were walking away from a table as we approached and Sean grabbed two pool cues. He passed me one, smirking. “I’ll let you break if you want, tough guy.”
“Nah.” I grinned back. “You go ahead. I think you might need a head start.”
He brushed by me and proceeded to rack the balls before bending over the table to steady himself for a shot. My teeth pressed into my lip as I stared at his ass, mind drifting to thoughts of being inside him—which I couldn’t deny terrified me. But it also excited the shit out of me.
Three striped balls flew across the table and zigzagged their way into separate pockets. Sean tapped his pool cue against the floor, appraising me with a raised brow. “What was that you were rambling on about? Something about whipping my ass?”
I walked up beside him, purposefully bumping his shoulder. “Three balls does not a game make,” I chided, leaning over the table and aligning my body with the cue ball. Eyeing it, I was about ready to take the shot when Sean came up behind me, folding his body over mine. The length of his cock, now hard, pressed against my ass and I inhaled a sharp breath. “Are you trying to distract me?”
“Maybe.” He rubbed up against me. “Is it working?”
My breathing quickened and I looked back at him, keeping my voice low. “You’re making me hard.”
He practically growled, the weight of him leaving me as he bent to whisper in my ear, “I want to do things to that ass. With my fingers…with my cock…with my tongue.”
I tried to push the images from my mind. It was a challenge to say the least. “Stop trying to fucking distract me.” I grinned. “I need to focus.” He stood, but remained close as I set up for the shot. “Green in the corner pocket.” The ball dropped in with a loud crack and I smirked. “You were saying?”
He chewed on the inside of his cheek while his eyes rolled upward in thought. When they came back down, he scrubbed his forefinger back and forth over his lip. “How about we make a little wager?”
“What kind of wager?”
He cocked a hip against the table, crossing his arms over his chest. “If I win, you come home with me.”
I tilted my head, mimicking his stance. “And if I win?”
The space between us grew thick with sexual tension. “Whatever you want.”
Heat traveled south to my dick. “You’re on.”
Easy conversation flowed, and while whatever we were doing together started out ass-backwards, I found a comfort level with Sean that I hadn’t experienced in a long time. Eight games and two hours later, he set his pool cue on the table, lifting his eyes to mine. “You’re not bad.”
“Not bad? I just beat your ass six out of eight games. I’d say that’s significantly better than not bad.”
He looked around what was now a near-empty room then prowled over to me, eyes infused with heat. Standing in my breathing space, his voice was a rough whisper. “What do you want, Colt? I’ll do anything you want. Give you anything you want.”
His heady tone washed over me, and although every part of me was yelling yes at the top of my lungs, I closed my eyes and garnered the strength to do the right thing. “I want a raincheck.”
Again, I expected him to push the issue. But instead, he acquiesced. “You got it.”
We stared at each other for several long seconds and I tried to hide the string of disappointment pulling tight around my chest. But I was the one who stated the terms and now I needed to own up to them. Backing away, I turned toward the exit and Sean followed behind.
The air was brisk, cool enough to chill my skin and exactly what I needed. Sean walked quietly beside me, seeming to be deep in thought. The moment we reached my car, he finally spoke up.
“This was…nice. I really enjoyed your company tonight.”
My gaze traveled to his assessing eyes. “You sound surprised.”
“Not surprised.” He took a step toward me. “Just pleased.” He continued to stalk closer until he backed me up against my car. Chest to chest, he braced his arms on either side of me. “Are you sure you won’t change your mind?”
“Positive,” I replied, but my voice lacked conviction.
He took advantage of my weak response and pinned me with his hips, showing me just how much my presence was desired. “And there’s nothing I can do to change your mind?” Leaning in, his mouth hovered over mine, breath warm against my skin. “Because I really want to change your mind.”
Before I had a chance to react, his hands left the car and he cupped my jaw, lips seeking out mine. God, he felt amazing. The hard planes of his chest. His mouth, as he kissed me slow, tugging at my lower lip with his teeth before opening me up to tongue me deep. My fingers curled into his shirt as I struggled to fight the desire to go with him. Or rip his clothes off in the parking lot. I wasn’t sure which one.
His callused fingertips roamed my face, threaded through my hair. He angled my head as he plunged his tongue further into my mouth, grinding his cock against mine. I moaned, and it was probably loud enough to attract attention, but I couldn’t help myself. His touch, his mouth, his erection—all just too damn good. The sound triggered something in him, too, because he pressed his lips harder, rougher against mine until he pulled away. We were both panting, my hands fully clenched in his shirt, not wanting to let go.
But I didn’t have a choice.
Sean backed up, abruptly, and my arms dropped to my sides. He swept a hand through his hair a few times as he tried to get his breathing under wraps. The pavement swallowed his focus for what seemed like endless minutes. “You make me…lose myself,” another heavy breath, “…lose control.”
“Is that bad?” I questioned, attempting to calm my own breathing.
He raised his fiery eyes to mine. “No. It’s not. It’s just…it’s been a long time since I’ve felt this way.” He cleared his throat. “Thank you for tonight.”
Frozen in place by his kiss, and his words, I watched him walk away, wondering if he wasn’t the only one losing control.
And wondering what any of this meant. But I knew it meant…
Something.
I stared down into my cup. The black coffee was bitter, but it packed the punch I needed. As I waited for Willow, I tried to decipher my thoughts. Figure out the best way to approach this. I didn’t want to hurt her, but I also knew what we had wasn’t serious. She made that clear in the beginning when we got together. She wasn’t interested in a long-term commitment and neither was I.
“Hey,” she greeted me out of breath, yanking me from my overactive brain. She looked gorgeous. Her red hair cascading over her shoulders, cheeks tinged pink from the autumn air. A surge of guilt bubbled up in my chest. “I’m sorry I’m a little late. There was an accident on the highway.” She glanced down at the table, eyeing the powdered donuts and the large mocha frappuccino. “Wow, what’s all this?”
“I just thought you might be hungry.” The words came out casual, but one of her brows shot up as if she knew better.
“Thanks.”
“You look great.”
She slid into the booth, letting her purse fall down her shoulder. “Okay, Colt. What’s going on?”
You mean, aside from the sweat making my palms feel sticky? Nothing.
“Shit, Willow. Can you at least take a bite of your donut first? Have a drink?”
She grinned and shook her head. Then she lifted a donut and brought it to her red-stained lips, smatterings of powder dropping to the table. After a dramatic bite, she set it aside. “There. Now will you tell me what’s going on?”
My fingers got busy drawing circles on a napkin. “First, I wanted to apologize for running out on you last night. I had a lot on my mind and I needed some space to think. Thanks for giving that to me and not being angry.” She nodded, waiting for me to go on. “And…I need to talk to you about something.” Her expression wavered at the change in my tone and she bit down on her lip. Was she nervous? It threw me off because it was a trait I wasn’t accustomed to seeing in her.
I blew out a heavy breath. “Okay, so I met this guy. And before you say anything, it started out because of our conversation about you wanting to see two guys…well, you know,” I added, balling up the napkin in my hand. “Anyway, I don’t know, I like him and…well, when I was a kid, I had this friend…” I paused, searching for the right words. But there were no right words. There was only the truth. “Fuck, Willow. I’m bisexual.”
My words took a second to register before she managed to speak. “You’re what?”
“I’m bisexual. I like guys too, and—”
“I know what it means, Colt.” Her response came out harsh but then she softened her voice. “What I want to know, is, what it means for us?”
My fingers crawled to hers on the table. “I still love being with you, Willow. But I’m interested in exploring whatever this is, with this guy, Sean. And…you know how I am, I’m not one for seeing two people at once, it’s just not me. So—”
“You want to take a break for a while.”
“Yeah.” I sighed, relieved at finally letting the truth out. “And I don’t want to hurt you, either. But I had to be honest with you about this.”
She offered me a smile, but it seemed forced and that surprised me. “I’m glad you were. You’re a good guy, Colt. But…I can’t say that I’m not disappointed.” She raised her cup to her mouth, speaking behind the rim. “I liked what we had going. And I wanted it to continue.” She took a sip of her coffee, one that seemed to go on forever.
I squeezed her hand. “Willow—”
“I’m fine, really,” she supplied, but I wasn’t sure I believed her. I slid out of the booth and came around to sit next to her. “Come here.” Slipping my arm around her shoulder, I tucked her into my side. “I’m sorry. I didn’t plan for this to happen.”
At that, she laughed. “I know. I only have myself to blame. Me and my big ideas.” I rested my chin against her hair and she sighed. “Well, we can still be friends, right?”
“Of course.” I kissed her head. “Always.”
“And who knows, if anything changes…and I’m still available,” she added, and I heard the smile in her voice. Relief swam through my veins, and I smiled too.
“I promise. You’ll be the first to know.”
My conversation with Willow played on a loop in my head. Not only that, but I was slowly coming to terms with the fact that I was bisexual—and I admitted it.
Overwhelmed by this revelation, I broke out into a furious run on the treadmill. My eyes scanned the room, gaze skating from the women whose tits were spilling out of their sports bras, to guys wiping down sweaty abs with their t-shirts. As if a switch had been flipped, my brain went into overdrive. Now, I didn’t know where to look first.
“Snap out of it.” Nate’s voice was filled with amusement as he glanced at the object of my stare. “He’s packing, huh?”
I laughed. “Shut the fuck up…and you’re late.”
He slung a towel over his shoulder and stepped onto the treadmill next to me, powering it on. “Marissa and I stopped over at her mom’s house and her mom wouldn’t stop feeding us. Needless to say, you and I now have a fridge full of leftovers.”
“Awesome.” I pressed the button to turn the belt to a higher speed. “I guess we won’t need to shop for a few days then, well, except I’m out of Doritos.”
“You and those damn Doritos.” Nate threw me a one-eyed stare. “Whoa. Trying to work off some steam, or what?”
“Sort of.”
He started a slow jog. “Is this about what happened after I left the bar? Because you’ve been pretty tight-lipped about it since the other night.”
My cheeks filled up with air and I blew out
a breath. “Not much happened. We talked, shot some pool, and that was it.”
“That was it, huh?” The grin in his tone was a mile wide. “Okay, if that was it, then why do you seem so frustrated?”
“Honestly?”
“No,” he chuckled, “I want you to lie to me.”
I stared blankly at the television overhead. “Am I attracted to the guy? Yeah, I am. But it’s more than that. I genuinely like him, and I feel like a shit. Don’t get me wrong. I talked to Willow and was up front with her, but considering she’s always wanted to leave things open, her reaction surprised me. I don’t know,” I went on, “I want to spend more time with Sean and I’m just not the kind of guy anymore who can do both.”
Nate slapped me with his towel to grab my focus. “Jesus, you are still the master of overthinking. Do you hear yourself? And what’s with all the guilt? You aren’t married for fuck’s sake.”
“No, I’m not. But I’m not into playing the field like I used to be.”
“Okay.” He wiped the sweat from his face. “So don’t see Sean anymore.” Then he smirked, shaking his head. “We’re getting into weird territory here. I feel like Dr. Phil.”
The only words that cleared my ears were the ones about not seeing Sean again. Everything inside me rejected that because it wasn’t what I wanted. Besides, I’d already told Willow I needed a break. “It’s not that, it’s just…”
“Just what?”
“I haven’t heard from Sean since the night at the bar so I don’t know what’s going on.”
He looped his towel over the treadmill. “So call him and figure it out. You know, with one of those old-fashioned things they call phones.”
“Real funny.”
Upping his running speed, he turned to me and surveyed my face. “Wow, you really do like the guy.”
“Yeah.”
“Well, you know my motto.” He smiled. “You only live once.”
He was right. And what did I have to lose?
