The entire charade here had been my fault. “I’d do anything to take yesterday back.”
“All forgotten now.” He gestured. “Open it.”
“I can’t until tomorrow.”
“Merry Christmas, Mia.” He lifted a similar box onto his lap. “They’re meant to be opened now.”
“I’ll accept this gift on one condition.”
“Let’s hear it?”
“You take my money for the gifts.”
“Give it to me later.”
That made me smile and I lifted the lid off the box. “Ice skates?”
“When I was a kid, ice skating at Christmas was a tradition. When I moved away from home I let that go. Family times were infrequent. I learned to cherish them.”
Having been sent to boarding school at five years old, he probably looked forward to trips home more than most kids. The thought of a lonely Cameron was too horrible to contemplate.
“It’s rather nice to revisit those memories.” He gazed out.
Oh God. I’d just shoved a fucking emotional spear right into his heart by mentioning Richard, and Cameron had planned a romantic afternoon for us.
My thoughts fell back on what he might have been going to tell me.
“I just don’t want anyone to get hurt,” I whispered.
“I know. Me neither.”
Running my fingers along the outside of the blade, I tried to find the words.
You’ve already told him.
He knows you love him.
“Mia, I’ll cherish our time together,” he said. “It’s hard to believe not that long ago you were that young woman I met in the coffee room. Wide eyed and innocent.”
“When I first met you,” I said, “you kind of scared me.”
“How about now?”
I gave a shake of my head. “Maybe you should let down your guard more. Let people in.”
“It’s getting easier.”
“I love my skates. Thank you.”
“Shall we try them out?”
“When?”
“Now. They have an ice rink here.” His face lit up and he gestured toward the tower. “Right here in this ancient fortress.”
He made it sound so romantic.
I’d only ever roller bladed before and those had been rusty old boots I’d found in a moldy box in the garage. I hoped I wasn’t about to turn Cameron’s romantic idea of the two of us elegantly floating on ice into him hauling me off to the ER.
“I’ll keep you safe,” he said, as though reading my mind.
His tone was laden with meaning.
As we stepped out, Christmas music carried over the castle wall, along with the sound of laughter and of skates slicing along ice.
Within minutes we’d pulled on our skates, leaving our shoes behind in the car, and made our way onto the rink.
A vastness of white faux ice was nestled in the hollow of the tower’s dry moat. An enormous decorated Christmas tree rose high at the end of the rounded out hollow, overlooked by the castle wall, and beyond that the castle turrets.
My breath left me…
At the center of the rink were cones laid out, and dancing within them talented skaters were allowed full rein. A few of them were performing fancy moves that in my head I knew I could pull off, only my shaky legs and sliding feet hadn’t gotten the ‘I too have Olympic skills’ memo.
Seriously, these skaters were gliding backwards and forwards, performing death defying pirouettes, and what looked like perfect double axels.
With Cameron’s hand firmly holding mine, he led me off to the edge, and after a few potentially hazardous slips and slides, I settled into the quick foot movement, each foot pushing off the ice with my blades. It even started to look like I knew what I was doing.
He was going to tell you he loves you, came my cruel inner tease.
And you sabotaged it.
Don’t think about that now.
Don’t.
I begged my imagination not to go there. That place where hopes and dreams stood a chance of coming true.
And I’d thought our time on the London Eye was surreal.
My feet found their rhythm and I matched Cameron’s strides, both of us in perfect unison as we skated around the outside with Jingle Bells playing. More experienced skaters whizzed by with a whoosh.
Of course Cameron skated like a pro. It made me wonder if his childhood had been all about mastering every single sporting activity known to man and learning to excel at each one. For goodness sake, he knew how to fence, play polo, do that fancy thing with breath control while swimming the butterfly, and fly a helicopter.
Not to mention his dreaminess in the bedroom.
Yet he’d failed to meet Mrs. Right.
A baffling concept, considering he seemed so perfect in every way.
Here we were, hand in hand, acting like two happy lovers just skating around the rink. In reality we were merely dragging out the pain of our impending separation as though we couldn’t bear to be apart, both of us willingly stretching out the inevitable and braving the ache of what was to come.
Be in the now, I soothed. Savor every last second of him.
A young skater flew by and bumped into my left arm, sending me off into a spin. Cameron reached out and nudged me away from the crowd.
A blur of lights and color. Music faded.
Screaming and laughing at the same time, I skidded in a wide circle and came back around, bumping right into Cameron’s chest.
“Whoa.” He laughed, his arms flailing for balance, his legs giving way as he tipped and slammed flat on his back.
I collapsed on his chest, giggling.
“Are you okay?” I said breathlessly.
“Now I am.” He cupped my face with his hands and kissed me, crushing his lips against mine, his tongue searching my mouth, forcing mine wider. His kiss alighted every sense, every cell, until all I knew was him.
We could have been anywhere. Both of us lost awareness that we weren’t alone.
The sound of skates came a little too close; a spray of ice hit us. “You two okay?” a woman asked in a Louisiana accent.
I opened my eyes to see a middle-aged woman peering down at us.
“We’re fine, thank you,” said Cameron.
“Could you two look any more perfect for each other,” she said, and threw her head back in a laugh before skating off.
My gaze shot to Cameron’s.
“It’s probably a good thing you’re not mine,” he said.
“Why?”
“I’d possess you beyond all understanding.”
I sagged against him, resting my head on his chest.
“You will never submit to any man the way you submit to me.” His tone was firm and masterful.
I raised my head to look at him. “No, I won’t.”
“Finally, the truth.”
The unfairness of his manipulation soaked into my bones, along with the chill of the ice.
“You will submit to Richard for me, understand?” he said firmly. “Whenever you have doubt, replace it with the knowledge you do everything he asks of you for me.”
“Cameron—”
“You please me when you please him.”
“What about us?” I whispered.
“The only reason for us was to take you to the level of excellence you needed to obtain. For Richard. Your one true master.” He lowered his gaze. “You just confessed how you can’t wait to go back to him.”
I had, but for all the wrong reasons.
I’d wanted him to know it had never been his money I’d wanted. It had only ever been him. Didn’t he know how damn gorgeous he was? That he was beautiful, gifted, and brilliant?
That he’d saved my life?
His eyes held mine, as though waiting for my response.
I couldn’t fail him now. Not after all he’d done for me, given me, expected of me.
Cameron had always been honest. The only confusion of my role had come from me.
/> “When I told you I love you,” I muttered, “what I meant was I love how you’ve crafted me to please Richard. I am well prepared, sir.”
“And you promise to obey him in all things?”
“Yes.” A little dazed, I added, “I promise to make you proud.”
“This pleases me,” he said darkly, his breath on my lips. “I believe I’ve excelled all expectations.”
CHAPTER 20
I CHANGED MY outfit again.
This time I went for semi-casual—skinny jeans and a Donatella Versace blouse that had miraculously turned up in my closet.
We’d spent the rest of the afternoon with me in the sitting room, placing those gorgeous blue baubles on the tree, and Cameron helping me hang blue tinsel around it. After we’d hung the Christmas lights around the branches and turned them on, it looked magical.
I couldn’t stop looking at it.
We moved into the kitchen and began preparing food for tonight’s dinner, with me peeling vegetables as well as a large bowl of apples for dessert, and Cameron following a Barefoot Contessa recipe to prepare a chicken. Shay had helped out where needed, and with all three of us hanging out in the kitchen we’d had a lovely afternoon.
Inside, I was a mess.
Richard’s plane had landed at Heathrow and he was on his way.
I loved him with all my heart but my mind was riddled with confusion.
Richard’s insistence he hand me over to Cameron to train into this lifestyle had been risky, as though my heart wouldn’t waver like it did for my new master versus my old.
My whirlwind romance with Cameron was over, along with all these glamorous experiences we’d shared, or even us hanging out downstairs cooking together.
I wandered over to the closet and pulled out a red dress on a hanger. The same outfit I’d warn when Cameron had pretended to be handing me over to Lance.
A chill ran up my spine when I thought of it. I still had his wife’s business card in my bag and had a good mind to phone her up and tell her to leave me alone. I wanted no part of their high roller stakes game.
A knock came and the door opened.
“Can I come in?” asked Cameron.
His face was cleanly shaven now, as though he too was trying to forget the last few days of what had felt more like an affair.
“I can’t decide what to wear,” I said, holding up the dress.
“What you’ve got on is fine,” he said. “It’s Christmas eve. Very relaxed.”
I placed the dress back in the wardrobe.
“I came to check on you,” he said. “How are feeling?”
“Nervous.”
“It’s excitement,” he said. “Richard knows London better than me. You’re both going to have fun.”
I reached out to touch his face.
Cameron’s fingers wrapped around my wrist and he gently pulled my hand away and he kissed it. Then let go.
“Of course. I’m sorry,” I said.
He shoved his hands into his pockets.
“Thank you for everything,” I said.
“Hey guys!” shouted Shay from downstairs. “Richard’s car’s here.”
My gaze held Cameron’s.
“Richard’s the best man I know,” he said. “He’s kind and patient, and understanding, and he made sure you had everything you needed to free yourself from pain, even with the consequence of him suffering the loss of you, for you. Loving someone this much is profound. Go make him happy.”
“Yes, but—”
“Obey every command.”
“But what if—”
“Every one of them.”
I hesitated, the words I so desperately searched for evading me.
“Go to him now, please,” he said. “Quickly.”
I headed out.
“Mia.”
I turned back to look at him. My fingers curled around the door handle.
“Remember to honor everything I’ve taught you.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You please me when you please him.”
My feet remained frozen where I stood. “In the car outside the Tower of London, what were you going to tell me?”
He stepped forwards and cupped my face in his hands, his lips hovering dangerously close to mine but not touching.
My entire body alighted by his firm touch, his closeness.
“Cameron—”
“Go,” he said, breaking away.
I hesitated.
“Now,” he yelled.
I ran.
Down the stairs, through the living room and through the hallway, running right into Richard’s arms.
CHAPTER 21
RICHARD HUGGED ME tight, lifting my feet off the ground and spinning me around, and our laugher lessened the tension.
Cameron, Shay, and I escorted him into the living room. Richard shoved the handle of his suitcase down.
His tan had faded a little and he looked fresh from the flight, those designer ripped jeans and black sweater giving him that familiar, edgy look.
“How is everyone?” His deep blue eyes crinkled into another smile.
“Everyone’s great,” said Cameron.
“Welcome to London,” said Shay.
“Could it be any fucking colder?” said Richard, peering over at the decorations. “Good job on the tree. Did you decorate it, Mia?”
“Yes, with help.” I looked over to Shay and Cameron.
“The place looks great,” said Richard.
I stepped forwards and fell into his arms again, needing to know I had what it took to make him happy. I threw a wary glance at Cameron, hoping to see I pleased him.
He gave a nod of approval.
“We’re enjoying your pokey little house,” said Shay, giving Richard a pat on the back.
“What can I tell you,” said Richard, patting Shay back. “This part of London’s exorbitant.”
“How was the flight?” asked Cameron.
“Not bad for a private jet. Not bad at all.”
Cameron rolled his eyes, clearly amused. “We missed you, buddy.”
“I’ll take your case up,” said Shay.
“No you won’t,” said Richard. “I’ve got it.”
“I insist. We want to get you settled as soon as possible so we can start drinking.”
“Well in that case,” said Richard. “Who am I to stop the fun?”
Shay grabbed the handle of the suitcase, tipped it, and rolled it towards the stairs. He headed on up with it.
“How have you been?” asked Richard, as his gaze fell on me.
“Fine. We’re so happy you’re here now.”
He gave a nod, his attention falling on Cameron. “What are you cooking? It smells amazing.”
“Rosemary chicken,” said Cameron. “Your favorite. Nothing like a home cooked meal. And Mia’s prepared an apple crumble especially for you.”
“Well I peeled the apples,” I said.
“And you made the crumble,” said Cameron.
“With your help.” I blushed.
“I made a promise to the United Nations that Mia wouldn’t ever cook again,” said Richard. “You’ve undone all my hard work to establish world peace.”
I thumped his arm.
He threw his head back in a laugh.
“Champagne?” said Cameron. “Unless you’d prefer water?”
“Bolly’s great,” said Richard.
Cameron reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of Bollinger. He set about uncorking it.
“So,” began Richard, “you decided not to lay low?”
Cameron placed three glasses on the bar. “I took Mia to a few places of interest.”
The champagne fizzed and sparkled and frothed to the top of each flute.
“Cheers.” Richard took one of them and handed it to me. He took another for himself.
“We went to the Tower of London,” I said.
Cameron shot me a cautious glance.
“Very nice,” said R
ichard.
“How’s Winston?” I asked.
“Missing you,” he said, taking a sip.
I missed that cute mutt too. “Is Scarlet dog sitting?”
“Yes, I told her she can take him to the office. He gets a little antsy when I go away for a few days. How was The Tower?”
“A little scary at first.” My stare shot to Cameron’s. “In a good way.”
A full spectrum of memories flooded me: the dungeons, that dreadful reveal about Cameron’s time in Afghanistan, and just this morning us ice skating on the moat.
“Mia’s desperate to go on a double-decker bus,” said Cameron.
“We can do that.” Richard turned to Cameron. “I’ll take her on the Eye.”
Cameron went to say something and chose not to.
“You took her on the London Eye?” asked Richard.
My face blushed wildly.
“Any word from Lance?” asked Richard sternly.
The mention of that name had me taking several large gulps of champagne.
“Let’s chat later,” said Cameron. “You just got off a long flight.”
My back stiffened as the tension rose.
Richard flashed a wary glance my way. “Apparently you had dinner with him? And you took Mia.”
“And you know this how?” asked Cameron.
“Lance texted me,” said Richard. “He was pissed the dinner didn’t go down so well. Mentioned something about unruly behavior. About you not controlling your sub.” Richard gave a reassuring smile. “Good for you.”
“Your meeting with him didn’t go down too well either,” said Cameron.
“We agreed to disagree.”
“He’s in London,” said Cameron.
“Really.” Richard blinked at him. “Other than the threats, I had a great evening with Lance and Helete.” He looked over at me. “Helete’s his wife.”
I gave a nod I knew that.
“They were happy and relaxed,” said Richard. “He’s excited about his campaign.” He gave a mischievous grin. “I even offered to donate to it.”
“Good for you,” said Cameron. “How did dinner end?”
“With me telling them Mia’s my girlfriend. I offered them another sub.”
“And?”
Enthrall Him (Enthrall Sessions Book 3) Page 18
