by Leigh, T. K.
“Do you know why I asked you to come here today?”
“Yes, sir,” I responded, trying to exude all the southern charm that I had learned from my aunt over the past several years. “I was out of line in class today. I apologize for my behavior and lack of judgment. It won’t happen again.”
It was silent for a moment while he appeared to process my words, caressing his chin with his folded hands. “You see, Miss Bowen, while I do appreciate and admire people who have the courage to stand up for what they believe in, I find your method of trying to bring attention to yourself quite juvenile.”
“I was not trying to bring attention to myself,” I protested.
“Then leave the sarcastic comments for your devoted followers, Miss Bowen. Your brother may find your sense of humor endearing, but I do not.”
“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll keep that in mind in the future.”
“He’s not always going to be around to cover for you. He’s not always going to pick up the pieces for you. Don’t you want to be an individual instead of someone who is so dependent on another person that they barely have their own identity?”
I was completely taken aback by his words. “I have my own identity,” I murmured.
“Do you? By all means, please enlighten me. I’ve been trying to ascertain who the real Marley Bowen is for years.”
I fidgeted with my skirt, wishing that I hadn’t rolled the waist to make it shorter. The way he was staring at me made me want to cover every inch of my body with heavy armor. I could see how other girls at school would find it endearing and attractive, but they didn’t have the past I had. Then again, I knew I was overreacting, as I was prone to do whenever in awkward private situations like this.
“I’m only seventeen. I don’t know who the real Marley Bowen is. But I will say this about her. She doesn’t always do what’s expected of her. Not anymore.” I stood up from the chair and grabbed my bag, looking down at him. “Are we done here? I’m already late for my next class, sir.”
“Yes, we are…for now.”
I turned away and went to open the door, only to find that he had locked it. My hands grew unsteady and I quickly unlocked it, throwing it open and practically sprinting down the hall.
I hated that my past still made me think the worst of everyone. He was a teacher, for crying out loud. Why did I automatically assume that he locked the door to his office for some perverse reason? Was I more messed up than I originally thought? Since spotting Buck in Charleston over the weekend, I felt as if I was losing control over everything. I needed to get it back.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
WHEELS TURNING
“SO WHAT’S THIS I hear about you banging Brianna?” Mason, her ex-boyfriend and one of my basketball teammates asked, coming up to me as I sat down at my regular lunch table to wait for Doug.
“You guys broke up.” I shrugged, scanning his muscular stature. “And we’re not having sex. Even if we were, it’s none of your business.”
He slammed his fist on the table, startling me.
“What the hell’s gotten into you?” I asked. “You’ve been hanging around with Grady a bit too much.”
“That has nothing to do with it. I’m just not keen on the fact that she moved on already. We dated for two years.”
“And how long during those two years were you sleeping with Jessica Harper?”
His dark eyes flamed. “None of your fucking business.”
Grady, another one of my teammates and Mason’s sidekick, approached, his dark hair disheveled. I could almost smell the faint aroma of pot around him. “Heard you’re dating Mason’s ex. Did she ask you to be her escort to the Jessamine Court introduction?”
“Yeah, she has.”
“Marley’s in the court, too, isn’t she?” Mason asked, his fierce expression softening a bit.
“Yeah.”
“Who’s she taking?” he asked, his eyebrows raised.
“Don’t get your hopes up…either one of you,” I cautioned my teammates. “She’s kind of seeing someone.”
Both of their eyes grew wide in unison. “Who?”
“Me,” Doug said, sitting down next to me and taking a bite out of his sandwich.
“You’re shitting me,” Mason retorted. “Marley Bowen is dating you?”
“Don’t sound so surprised,” he said. “I’m living proof that girls like nice guys and don’t want to always date someone who looks at them like a piece of meat like you two assholes do.”
“Hey,” Grady interjected. “Plenty of girls have been unable to resist my charm.”
“Yeah,” I agreed. “Until you got them in bed, then sent them packing.”
“That was, like, one girl!” he protested. “Diana Greene. People don’t call her ‘dirty Diana’ for nothing.”
“And you guys wonder why I never wanted you to date Marley.” I rolled my eyes at them.
Grady shrugged. “Whatever. She’ll get bored with Doug, I’m sure.”
“Don’t count on it,” a familiar voice interjected. I looked at Doug and smiled when I saw Marley sit down next to him and place an affectionate kiss on his neck. “And even if I wasn’t dating him, I wouldn’t go out with either one of you, so don’t waste your time or energy.”
I snickered at Marley’s boldness.
“I heard you already got in trouble this morning,” Mason said snidely.
She looked down at her yogurt, avoiding his eyes. “Maybe. Nothing I can’t handle.”
“What did you do?” I asked.
“Nothing, Cam.” She glared at me. “I may have been a bit snarky to Mr. Monroe during my Governments class that you signed me up for. I’m not happy with you at all right now.”
“It’s an important class, Mar. You’ll thank me later.”
“Don’t hold your breath,” she mumbled.
“Let’s go, Grady,” Mason said. “See you at practice after school.” He retreated from our table and I wondered how Brianna could ever date a prick like him.
“What was that all about?” Marley asked.
“He’s just pissed that I’m dating his ex, even though he treated her like crap the whole time.”
She scanned the cafeteria before leaning across the table. “Have you seen her yet today?” she asked in a quiet voice.
“Yeah. Third period. She’s in my History class,” I replied. “I think she was late this morning because she was supposed to be in my first period Spanish class, too, but she never showed up. Why?”
“No reason,” she said quickly. “I ran into her when I was heading to Mr. Monroe’s office and she seemed a little, well…off.”
“I think her mom let her have it pretty bad when she got home yesterday. She was a bit out of it in class this morning and you could tell that she was still a little agitated.”
“She was in homeroom,” Doug offered.
Marley scrunched her eyebrows at him. “She was?”
“Yeah. But about a minute before the bell rang, she got called out to Mr. Grayson’s office…or maybe her dad’s. I can’t remember. All I remember was that it was something about a family emergency. Mason walked her down there because she appeared to be a little worried. I don’t think our homeroom teacher has heard that they’ve broken up yet.”
“I hope everything’s okay,” I said.
“I have to go.” Marley shot out of her chair, leaving her half-eaten yogurt on the table.
“Where are you going?” I called after her as she began to walk away.
“Nowhere. I just… I have to go. I’ll see you later, Cam.” Determined, she walked out of the cafeteria toward the theater wing. I could almost sense the wheels turning in her head.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
SIGNS
THE THING ABOUT BEING a victim of abuse is that you can sometimes sense when someone else is suffering through it. You see the signs more clearly than most people, usually because it’s the same things that you tried to hide…sometimes the same things you’re still trying t
o hide.
Then again, sometimes you feel so alone and isolated that you wish you had someone to talk to about what you went through, so you try to see something that’s not there. It’s a fine line.
All I did know, as I was leaving the cafeteria after hundreds of red flags started popping up, was that I had a very good idea about where Brianna was. It was where I always went when I was having an “episode”. Walking through the empty halls, I pulled open the door that led up to the catwalk of our school’s state-of-the-art theater. Climbing the narrow spiral stairs, I emerged onto the truss, thankful that I never had a fear of heights. I guess I’d have to be scared of dying first, I thought to myself.
I took a step onto the catwalk and Brianna must have sensed the shift of weight. She looked up from where she was sitting overlooking the theater fifty feet below us.
“Hey, Marley.”
“Hey, Bri,” I responded, taking several cautious steps toward her.
Sitting down next to her, I dangled my feet over the side, poking my legs through the safety grates that were there to prevent anyone from falling down below.
I had always been able to read people. Something about Brianna’s aura led me to believe that she was at war with herself…almost like she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs but, at the same time, stay mute. I had my suspicions that something was going on, but I had no idea what. I wondered if things weren’t quite over between her and Mason, as much as she probably wanted them to be. My heart began to break for her and I knew what I had to do, regardless of my aunt’s insistence that I pretend it never happened.
“Has Cam ever said anything about why we moved here?” I asked her. Like the rest of the town, she most likely knew absolutely nothing.
“No, he hasn’t.”
I kept my eyes trained forward and nodded. “My dad died when we were eight. I loved him. Well, of course I did. He was my dad. We had such a strong connection. He was a mechanic and loved cars. When I was just a little girl, I remember telling him that I wanted a Mustang when I got older and could drive.” I smiled at the memory.
“He was coming home from work one night and was killed by a drunk driver. It was Memorial Day weekend. Cam and I had just turned eight a few weeks beforehand. Mama had postponed our birthday party to have it that weekend. Instead of celebrating our eighth birthday with friends and family at a back yard Low Country Boil, we mourned my father and threw his ashes out to sea.”
I looked down when I felt a hand meet mine.
“Mama was having a hard time with Dad’s death. He was her soul mate…her one true love…her everything. She shut down and turned off. I always wondered what a broken heart felt like. Looking at my mama, I knew that she was suffering from one. They loved each other so fiercely. Whenever I was around them, I physically felt the love they shared. After he died, I no longer felt that. Part of Mama died in that car wreck, too.
“I remember Cam having to help me get ready for school the first day of third grade in September because our mama was too drunk to wake up. You’d think that, with her husband having died because of a drunk driver, she would stay far away from liquor, but she didn’t. She stopped going to work and we eventually lost the house that we had grown up in. We were forced to move from apartment to apartment…places that weren’t fit for habitation, but it was all she could afford.
“One day, a man appeared on our doorstep and, for a brief period of time, everything seemed like it was going to get better. Mama stopped drinking and using drugs. She cooked. She cleaned. She even got a job so that we could move into a better place. Then, one night, she fell off the wagon and started using again. I remember seeing her put the needle in her arm as we sat there watching TV on a Friday. She said it was her medicine and that she needed it. He didn’t do anything to stop her. It was almost like he encouraged her…almost like he had simply been biding his time, waiting for her to slip up and start using again.
“Cam and I shared a room. There wasn’t much space, but we didn’t mind. After being allowed to stay up to watch the ball drop that New Year’s Eve, we went to sleep. Hours later, I woke up to someone climbing in bed with me. Someone that weighed much more than Cam.”
Brianna gasped and squeezed my hand even harder.
“I looked across the bedroom at Cam’s bed, hoping that he would come help, but he wasn’t there. I was so angry with him for abandoning me, for not doing anything even when he could hear my screams and cries for help. It happened over and over, almost every night. I would go to school during the day and be subjected to abuse at night. Every few months, Mama would sober up enough to realize that something was going on and would get us away from him, promising to never let him know where we ended up. But once the cash ran out and she needed drugs and alcohol, she would break down and call him. No one at any of the schools we went to ever did anything. Kids were coming in without having eaten in days, so when a little girl comes to school with a few scratches and bruises, no one says anything. I wish someone noticed it, though. If they did, I wouldn’t have had to live that nightmare for nearly three years.”
I turned to look at her and saw the tears forming in her eyes. “One night, Cam had enough of listening to my cries. So instead of putting up a fight and trying to protect me when he came in, he left the bedroom. Not even five minutes later, he returned with my mama’s gun and shot him. Mama went to jail for a little bit for child endangerment and neglect. Guardianship of Cam and me was granted to my aunt and uncle until we turn eighteen. And that’s the real story of why Cam and I came to Myrtle Beach.”
I stared straight ahead as I tried to hold back the tears I felt from sharing my story with someone. It had been years since I had spoken those words. It felt alarmingly therapeutic.
“I’m sorry that you had to go through that,” Brianna said, breaking the heavy silence.
“Me, too. I wish someone had noticed something off about our home situation early on. That way, I wouldn’t have had to live the nightmare for as long as I did. I wish that someone had seen the signs, had heard the desperate pleas for help that I was shouting with my eyes.”
I glanced at her and noticed her tense up. “I get it, Bri. I know what you’re going through.”
“What?” Her voice grew loud. “What do you think I’m going through?”
I tried to stand my ground. I could only imagine what she was thinking at that moment, knowing that all her attempts to cover up the pain and torment had been for nothing. “I’m not sure, but I have a feeling. And, well, I just wanted to let you know that I’ll listen if you ever want to talk about it. Your secrets will always be safe with me, just like I know mine will be safe with you.”
“Does Doug know?” she asked, obviously curious.
“No, he doesn’t. Besides my aunt and uncle, and Cam, I don’t think many people know the truth.”
“They make you hide it, don’t they?”
“Yeah, but there’s only so long anyone can possibly be expected to keep it inside. I’m glad that I finally shared it…with you.”
“Why not Carla or Kristen? I know how close you are with both of them,” she said.
“I know, and I love them both dearly, but if I told them, it would be turned into the latest Hollywood blockbuster before the final bell of the day.” I met her gaze once more. “I trust you, Bri. We have a unique friendship that I wouldn’t trade for anything. I feel like I can tell you anything and you won’t use it against me or to benefit you.”
“I would never be able to betray anyone like that…even if I hated them.”
“That’s why you’re the perfect girl for my brother. You’re a lot alike in that way. He has a good heart, and so do you.”
“But what if he finds out? About me? I mean, if there was something going on, how will he react? I don’t want to hurt him, but I don’t know… I just can’t say anything, Marley. I wish I could, but I can’t.”
“Believe me, I know how you feel. Take your time. Learn who you can trust and who you can�
��t. Then slowly begin to share with those that you can. Those people who will never judge you for something you had absolutely no control over. Even if all you need is someone to just sit with and remain completely silent, sometimes that helps, too.”
“Like you and Cam and the roof?”
I giggled. “Yeah. Like the roof. This could be our roof, Bri.”
She wiped her cheek. “I like the sound of that.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
PURPOSE
I PULLED UP IN front of our house after basketball practice, wondering what Brianna’s Beetle was doing parked alongside the road. Practice had been a bit awkward. Coach had to break up a few scuffles between Mason and me. He had this mania in his eyes, almost like he had this obsession with Brianna. Like if he couldn’t have her, no one could.
Entering the house, I was surprised to see Marley and Brianna playing with Julianne and Meg.
“Your boyfriend’s home,” Marley said in a teasing manner.
Brianna looked up from where she was constructing a log cabin made of play-dough with Julianne. Her smile completely melted my heart. Any fight I got into with Mason and Grady was absolutely worth it just to see her smile.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hey,” she replied.
“Do you like Cam?” Meg asked, always the nosey one.
She grinned, her eyes remaining locked with mine. “Yes, I do. I like him a lot.”
“Have you kissed?” Julianne asked, butting in on the conversation.
Brianna’s eyes went wide, unsure of how to respond.
“That’s none of your business, munchkin,” I said quickly, saving her from having to answer my inquisitive sisters. Turning my attention back to Brianna, I lost myself in her brown eyes.
“Well, this is awkward,” Marley interjected. “Go shower, Cam. Bri came to see you, not me, and I think she’d prefer if you didn’t smell like the boy’s locker room.”
