Nerves, that’s all it was. The fact that she had had a very bad week just added to her high emotions. She was tired. She had not been ready to face him yet. That is all it was, nothing more.
He knew she was here now. He knew that she was back. There would be no escaping his presence.
He looked much older now, it had been close to ten years since she had last seen him. Of course he was going to look older. Why hadn’t she thought of that?
He still had that shock of dark wavy hair. Hair that appeared to have a different shade and tone for every single strand, if you looked closely enough.
His shoulders were still well defined and muscled, he had always worked out regularly when she had been living at home and it looked as if he continued to do so. His chest, wow, even under that shirt and jacket. Then there were those arms…
There had been a soft subtle tan on his skin and to cap it all off he had smelt so good. Even from where she had been standing several paces away she had been able to smell that heady musky earthy scent that always seemed to envelope him. How was that even fair?
It was spicy, tangy and so damned sexy. She caught her thoughts and stopped them dead in their tracks.
Jake and damned sexy? Three words that should never be linked together. Jake was not sexy, not in anyway. Not as far as she were concerned, she hated him. Hated him with a vengeance, hated him with a passion.
Amanda had not laid eyes on Jake since she had run away from home at the age of sixteen, ten years before.
It was funny how those ten years had melted away as she had stood there trapped in those resolute blue steel eyes of his. Eyes that you could easily lose yourself in. Jake was older than her by six years, well five and a half, now in his mid-thirties, he still had the power to make her feel insignificant.
Ten years had melted away and she was instantly that impulsive angry awkward teenager again.
She breathed in deeply closing her eyes for a few moments. Safe. Now that she was outside, she was safe from those prying eyes. She was safe from that cool, calculating brain of his. She was Safe from that devilishly sexy body.
But it had been those eyes that had captured her attention. They had been positively smouldering.
It was funny how she could not remember them as being smouldering. He had all-knowing eyes, maybe. All seeing eyes, probably. Intense, yes. But smouldering, no never.
“Amanda… sweetheart.” Amanda jumped out of her skin at the sound of his voice. A voice that dripped thickly with venomous sarcasm.
Jake had followed her, but then, she should have known that he would.
He would not have wanted to pass this opportunity up. She had been so lost in thoughts that she had not given a thought to Jake following her.
Mentally she gave herself a kick. Come on wake up and stop acting like a teenager.
“Jake.” She uttered the word on a breathless sigh as she squared her shoulders and turned to meet his uncom-promising hard gaze.
She breathed in sharply. No, she told herself. He was not going to intimidate her. She would not allow it. Not anymore.
It had been ten years, she was older. She was wiser than she had been when last they had squared up to one another. Well, older anyway.
She was truly a different person now. He did not know who she was anymore. He cannot intimidate her.
However, she knew that he could and he was just by standing there. Her hands were shaking. Her mouth had gone dry and her throat hurt from the sheer effort of breathing.
“It’s been such a long time.”
“I…”
“Ten years of not knowing whether you were dead or alive.” His angry voice snapped at her.
“It’s…”
“I didn’t know that you were back in town.” His eyes bore deep into hers. It was almost as if he were reading her very soul. That, she did not doubt, she felt exposed, vulnerable.
“I… I.” she stopped as she tried to get her brain to work.
“I… I… what?” he asked her. His voice deep and low. Almost calm.
“I have only been back a few days.” She lied.
“Ah yes, well that would explain it then.” He told her sarcastically.
“I haven’t had a chance to catch up with everyone yet.” Another lie but she did not care. She did not owe him anything after all.
Jake sneered scornfully he always saw right through her and it would appear that he had not lost the knack for it. Curse him, curse him to hell and back… well, maybe not back.
“I spent some time trying to locate you.” He told her now. Yes, she bet he had, but she did not say it, that was an argument that she did not want to have with him. “To let you know about Dad.” He finished.
“He was my father.” Instantly bristling at his words. “You were just adopted.”
For a fleeting moment she thought she had seen a flash of pain in his eyes, but then it was gone quickly. And just as quickly she dismissed it. Nothing she could say could possibly affect him she decided.
“I see you haven’t grown up at all since you have been gone… pity. It would have been nice to see you acting more elegantly.” He stated.
“Don’t you dare think you can judge me.” Her chin shot up.
“Don’t you dare think that you can lie to me.” Jake shot back at her. “Well.” He sighed. “It was a bit of a shock to see you. What shall I tell mother? She has been going through hell and back worrying about you.” He ground those last words out through clenched teeth.
She could see that pulse ticking away in his neck again. He may be holding on to it but he was as angry as hell.
Guilty Amanda flushed a deep crimson. She did feel bad, of course she did, and she knew she should have called home. Let her parents know that she was okay. She had wanted too many times. She had desperately wanted her mother to know that she was safe and well. She had desperately wanted to hear her mother’s voice.
She had picked up the phone many times but then she had replaced the receiver without ever dialling the number.
If she had of called Amanda knew that her mother would have been sure to have told Jake, Amanda knew Jake all too well. He would have wasted no time in tracking her down and then he would have dragged her back kicking and screaming the first chance he got.
The situation that had existed between them had been so intense that it had frightened her. So much so, that she had not dared to dial her mother’s number.
When she had come back six months ago, she had managed to convince herself that she was now finally ready to face Jake again. That she was over it and him, not that there had been anything to get over, she reminded herself sternly.
Now, standing here face to face with the man that had always had her at a disadvantage she knew that she was far from over it or him.
Feelings that she had managed to bury a long time ago resurfaced and threatened to consume her with their intensity.
It had been a huge mistake to come back. She knew that now it was a shame that she had not seen it before she had come back. But she had desperately wanted to make contact with her mother again.
She could feel tears burning her eyes blinding her vision. Attempting to be strong she impatiently blinked them away. It was best not to dwell too much on the past. What ever happened in the past has already happened. And she knew that she could not go back and change any of it, no matter how much she wished she could.
“I don’t know.” She told him now. The first honest words out of her mouth tonight.
“I will need to tell her something.” He pointed out.
“Why do you feel the need to tell her anything at all?”
“She will want to know.”
“It is none of your business.” She snapped at him.
“We are family.” He said.
“No, we are not family.” She told him. “It… might be better not to say anything at all.” She said. “I won’t be in town for long.” Another fib.
“This is a flying visit.” He
said, she could hear the sarcasm in his voice again. How did he know when she was lying?
“I am not planning on staying and it would only hurt her more if she knew.” She replied, trying to ignore his angry tones.
“Like you care.” He accused her. He spat the words at her as if they had left a bitter taste in his mouth.
“Think what you like.” She threw at him.
“You haven’t cared, not since the day you walked out.” His voice sounded hurt as though it had been painful for him. The audacity of the man.
“You have no idea.” She told him.
“There has been no phone call, no letter. In fact, there has been no contact whatsoever. Not even an attempt either that I can see.” Amanda watched his eyes darken and he clenched his hands at his sides.
“There was no point. I probably wouldn’t have been able to talk to my mother anyway.”
“Of course you would have done.” Amanda gave a cynical laugh.
“I wouldn’t have been able to get past her bodyguard.” She taunted him cruelly. He took a small step toward her and she stepped back immediately.
“I would have let you talk to mum.” Jake told her.
“Let me… let me.” She echoed. “Who the hell do you think you are. Let me speak with my own mother.”
“That’s not how I meant it and you know it.” Jake defended.
“Huh.” Amanda replied. “Yes you did and no, you wouldn’t have… let me…. Talk with my mother. You would have withheld the opportunity until I told you where I was so that you could come and get me.” She squared her shoulders.
“Amanda.”
“See, I am right.” She gloated.
“I would have only wanted to make sure you were safe.”
“No, it’s about control.” She flung at him.
“No, It’s about caring. Looking out for you.” He said.
“You… care?” Amanda gave a short laugh. “Yeah right. You mean control Jake. You want control. It has nothing to do with caring. It has always been about control.”
“If you really cared then you would have pick up the damn phone, just once would have been enough.” He paused briefly.
There was no disguising the hurt in his voice, in his eyes. But he quickly composed himself and soon he was back to cold hearted Jake. Which was just as well, she could handle that Jake.
“If I really cared?” She echoed as she pointed to herself. “Why should I care? Nobody cared about me.” She shouted, not even attempting to hide the hurt she felt.
“O don’t be so bloody ridiculous. Of course we care about you.” Jake sighed. “You don’t make it easy.”
“That’s right, it all my fault.” Who would have guessed.
“You always were…” He stopped.
“No go on. I was always what?” she challenged him.
“A redhead.” Jake said.
“How dare you.” She fumed.
“I dare.” He assured her.
“At least I’m not an overbearing egotistical power hungry maniac.” She flung at him.
“Amanda, you are… frustrating, it is you that doesn’t seem to care about anything or anyone. Just yourself. Dad spent everything he had trying to find his precious perfect little girl.” Jake scorned, spitting the words at her as though they had left a bad taste in his mouth. “He died a broken man. You…” He pointed at her, his voice dropping to barely a whisper.
“I was forced out.” She defended.
“Dad worried himself into an early grave. You did that. Proud of yourself?” he asked her raising an eyebrow at her.
“You are a nasty son of a bitch.” Amanda swallowed against the painful lump that had formed in her throat and blinked away the tears that were now stinging her eyes.
“So where have you been all this time? No doubt living it up someplace without a backward glance at the family you left behind.” He snapped angrily at her.
“Well isn’t that just typical of you Jake. You always did make assumptions. You always did jump to the wrong conclusions feet first. Perhaps you should learn to test the water first. One day you are going to jump in and you’ll be out of your depth. Now there is a novel idea Jake.” Amanda’s voice rose shrilly.
“Grow up for heaven sake.” Jake barked at her and Amanda jumped.
“I always knew that you disliked me. You hated having me around.”
“No, I never did.” Jake kept his voice down and even.
“Of course you did. You made your feelings very evident.” She threw at him.
“No, my darling… That was all you.” He pointed at her, his voice dropping low again.
“I was left out.” She shouted.
“Because you left yourself out.”
“No, it was you. You pushed me out of my own family.”
“Sweetheart you pushed yourself out.” Amanda shook her head vehemently to deny that fact.
“No. No. No. It was you.” She said as she stamped her foot. “You did not want me there, that much was obvious. You wanted my parents all to yourself.”
“Wow… you have a very bad memory.” Jake told her.
“No. You got greedy Jake. You couldn’t stand the thought of sharing my parents. Tell me did you always have that greedy nature? Is that why your parents dumped you?”
“You little…” Jake took a step toward her and she shrank back. She had made him angry, she could see that, and she had not meant what she had said.
She knew it wasn’t true. Knew that he had had a rough life before. His parents had walked out and left. Her parents had taken him in so that he was spared a life through the care system. She had been eight at the time and he had just had his thirteenth birthday.
“Jake…” She sighed heavily and shook her head, suddenly feeling tired. “I did us all a favour. I left and gave you what you wanted. I thought you of all people would have been happy to see the back of me. Ecstatically glad to get rid of me.”
She did not mean her cruel words, not really. Deep down she knew that, but whenever Jake was near her she could not help herself. It was a need deep down.
She had hurt for so long and she wanted him to feel some of that hurt.
“Don’t be so stupid. If you have a brain, and I know that you do, you should try actually using it.” He told her.
“How dare you.” She began but he cut her off.
“I dare because someone has to. I have never disliked you or hated you. That was… It was… We should… never mind what I felt… never mind what I wanted. It is all water under the bridge now. I am sure as adults we can put the past behind us, after all you are my sister.” He goaded her.
“I am not your… anything… Mr Michelson.” She told him hotly.
Jake raised one sardonic eyebrow at her. An amused expression tugging at his features. Tugging at the hardened lines making them smoother, warmer.
He looked inviting now. She could easily have forgotten herself and wrapped herself up in his arms. She dismissed her train of thought instantly and fought hard to stop the shiver run down her spine.
“Perhaps… I could give you a lift.” He asked her and Amanda felt her heart beating furiously in her chest. That was not a good idea at all she decided.
“No, I am fine.” She told him firmly. “Thank you anyway.”
“Or I could call you a cab, Miss Michelson.” He said mimicking her earlier tone.
The smug bastard. She experienced that overwhelming need to wipe that look clean off his face. Her palms itched at the thought and she squeezed her fingers tight into a ball to stop herself from doing just that.
“I can get my own cab. And it is Miss Garvie now.” Her chin shot up defiantly. So there, make out of that what you want. She thought childishly.
“You changed your name.” he stated reflectively. He sounded hurt by that, though she could not understand why. After all, Michelson wasn’t his original last name either. “Pity.” There was a pause as he slowly looked her up and down and Amanda fought hard not to squirm
at the intense scrutiny. “Miss Michelson suited you so well. I’ll give you a lift.” He informed her now.
“No… I” she tried.
“My car is this way.” And he strode off in the direction of his car leaving her to follow on behind him.
Chapter 4.
He really was the most arrogant, conceited, egotistical swine she had ever had the misfortune of meeting, and she had met a few.
Did he really think that she was just going to follow him? That she would just fall into his plans. Never in a million years. Hell would freeze over, after pigs flew past a blue moon, in a month of Sundays.
She watched Jake striding across the lawn in brisk long sure confident strides. Something erotic and familiar uncurled itself in the pit of her stomach and she had to hold her breath for a moment to try and steady herself. That walk was… stop it, she chastised herself.
She could feel the heat in her face. It swept over her in a giant humiliating wave. Thank heavens it was dark and Jake was already across the lawn so that he could not see.
Jake had almost made it to the other side of the lawn before he stopped and turned around slowly to regard her. She had not moved from the spot he had left her, he noted. They stared at one another in silence.
Jake watched in amusement as Amanda put one hand on her hip and she straightened her back as her chin jutted out in an act of defiance that even from this distance between them Jake could quite clearly see.
Fighting the urge to smile he sighed heavily and began to pace towards her in long strides. If that’s the way she wanted it. That was fine by him.
Amanda should have seen it coming. She should have seen the intent in his eyes and made a run for it before he could have reached her. She had been so caught up in her own thoughts that by the time she realised, it was far too late to do anything.
He reached her quickly. She stepped back and even managed to bring up her hands in front of her. But that was all she was able to do.
In one fluid motion and with a lightning speed Amanda thought only a cheetah could possibly possess and which knocked the breath right out of her sails. Jake leaned forward, grabbed her round her thighs and lifted her off the ground so that she was draped over his shoulder. Amanda gasped and cried out in alarm.
Battle Lines. Page 3
