by Naomi West
He handed her a warm bottle. “Would you mind?”
“Of course not.” Alexa sat and fed Damian while Hawk finished up their breakfast. He set a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast in front of her, then sat across from her at the table.
“You are a godsend,” he said. “You weren’t kidding about being good with kids.”
“It’s in my nature to care for people, I guess.” And to hunt down their murderers until they’re brought to justice, she resisted adding. Caring for Damian felt like doing something for Hugh, for the man she had failed to find proper closure. It couldn’t really make up for him being gone, but it made her feel good doing it. And it brought her closer to Hawk, and hopefully, to more answers.
“I do have a really huge favor to ask of you. And if you can’t, that’s okay.”
“Sure thing.”
“I can’t send him to his babysitters today,” he said. “She watches other kids in a daycare in her house and she has this rule about fevers. But I have a lot of cars to repo today. Is there any way you could stay with him?”
“I’d be happy to. Like I said, I work from home, so I’ll just grab my laptop from next door and work when he naps.”
“Are you sure that won’t mess up your day or keep you from working?”
“I’m my own boss. And I give myself permission.”
“You might just be the best neighbor on the planet,” he said. “I will absolutely give you proper compensation.”
“Oh no.” She waved him off. “You made me breakfast and got me out of the house. That’s more than I could have asked for.”
He chuckled. “Okay. I’m paying you something, though. Won’t take no for an answer.”
She smiled. She’d never planned on getting this close to Hawk, but it could help her find what she was looking for. Although now she wondered just how much she would find. She couldn’t ignore the little flutter in her chest when he looked at her. But if he was the criminal his record said he was, she had to keep her distance. Focus on Hugh’s murder and the baby, and that was it. Ignore the way his voice sent chills through her or the way watching him with his nephew warmed her heart. If she ignored all that until she knew for sure, then she’d be fine.
Chapter 5
Hawk picked up his phone as he headed toward his first job. “Hey Natalie. I won’t be bringing Damian over today. He has a fever.”
“Oh no! I’m so sorry to hear that! Poor little thing. Are you home all day with him?”
“No, I got my neighbor to watch him so I could do a few jobs.”
“Oh, that’s nice. Can you stop over later, after work?”
“Umm…”
“Damian left his little truck here. He might want it if he’s not feeling well.”
Hawk let out a sigh. “Okay. Yeah, I can stop by. It won’t be until later, though.”
“That’s perfect. Let me know when you’re on your way, and I’ll have it waiting for you.”
“Will do. Thanks, Natalie.”
He hung up and got about his business. His very first job, though, was a problem. The car wouldn’t start. It sounded like maybe the battery was dead. He didn’t have an extra. He called Jared to come with his truck to pull it out of there, but he hated doing that. It would mean having to give Jared the majority of the cut, and also that he had failed on some level. And that was the worst feeling. Though they traded jobs now and then, he avoided it if he could so he didn’t have to feel like this.
All day, it was one problem after another. An owner came out screaming at him and pulled a knife. That sort of thing never scared Hawk, and when he pulled out his pepper spray, the guy backed off. All the same it rattled him and pissed him off. He kept thinking of Damian, too, and wondering if he was okay. He thought about calling many times, but he didn’t want Alexa to think he didn’t trust her. He’d just never had to deal with the baby being sick like this. He called once at lunchtime, and Damian was sleeping and doing fine. He resisted the urge to call again.
By the end of the day, he was wiped. He was tired from not sleeping well the night before, and worn out from the hard day. He just wanted to get home, have a beer, and spend some time with Damian. He was also looking forward to seeing Alexa, but he tried to pretend like that wasn’t the reason he skipped the last job he planned to do. The baby was sick and he wanted to check on him. That was the real reason. Didn’t hurt that Alexa would be there when he got home.
He was halfway to home when he remembered he was supposed to stop at Natalie’s. He considered not bothering. What truck was she even talking about? But if it was something Damian liked to play with, then it might make him feel better to have it. He sent her a text that he was on his way, and made a turn to head toward her house.
He pulled up and went to the door, ringing it like he always did.
“Come in, Hawk!”
He opened the door and the house was quiet, which was unusual. There were always kids running around, playing, laughing, screaming. But today the house seemed empty.
“I’m in the living room!”
He took a few steps in the direction of the living room. When he entered the room, he stopped at the doorway. Natalie was sprawled out on the sofa, completely naked.
He turned away quickly. “Sorry.”
She laughed. “Don’t be sorry. I want you to look at me. I want you to touch me.”
He shook his head and turned back to face her, but looked only in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Natalie. I just can’t.”
“Oh yes, you can.” She beckoned to him with her finger. “Come on over here. You look like you’ve had a rough day. I can make you feel better.”
He had and no doubt she would. His mind flitted to Damian and Alexa, and the stiffness forming in his jeans faded. “You’re Damian’s babysitter. Or you were. I can’t sleep with someone who is caring for him like that. It’s not right.”
“Hawk. Please.” She sat up. “Don’t make this complicated. I want to sleep with you. No strings attached.”
“I’m just… not interested. I’m sorry.” He took a step away, then paused. “Is Damian’s toy even here?”
“Yes.” She pointed to a truck sitting on the coffee table.
He stepped forward and grabbed it. “Does he have anything else here?”
“No. Hawk, don’t be rash. Don’t stop bringing him over.”
“How can I keep leaving with you after this? I’ll have to find a new babysitter.”
“Hawk!”
He walked back toward the door, even more agitated than he’d been before. He slammed the door behind him and tore out of the driveway.
“Fuck!” He pounded on the steering wheel.
Now what the hell was he going to do? It’d been impossible to find a babysitter in the first place who could work with his schedule, and the other sitters he’d looked up had had a waiting list a mile long. He’d either have to restrict all his jobs to times that let him care for Damian, which would cost him jobs, or he’d have to pay out the ass for someone who could watch the baby on off hours.
Some repos had to be done in the middle of the night or on a Saturday. There were times he saw a car he’d been watching and had to leave Damian at a moment’s call. Most daycares didn’t appreciate that, and most babysitters charged an arm and a leg for that sort of thing. The thought occurred to him that maybe the reason Natalie was so accommodating was because she’d been trying to get him to sleep with her this whole time.
He had to figure something out fast or he’d end up either limiting his work, or bringing Damian on jobs. He really didn’t want to bring the baby along when he worked. Too much risk, too many opportunities for something to go wrong. That really wasn’t an option, the more he thought it through.
When he pulled into his driveway, he looked over at Alexa’s dark house. She lived so close. And she worked from home, which meant she was around. She was her own boss, so she didn’t have a schedule to keep up with. If she could help him out, even if for a short time, it migh
t be an ideal situation. And it’d give him a reason to see her more often.
He went inside and found them in the living room, Damian in Alexa’s arms, sucking down a bottle. His color looked to be back to normal, and clearly, his appetite had returned.
“Welcome home,” she said, smiling up at him.
“He looks better.”
“He is. Fever stuck around a little this morning and he was fussy, but I gave him more Tylenol and rocked him to sleep and when he woke up, he was back to what I assume is his normal self.”
“Thank you so much for staying with him today and helping me out. Did you get any work done?”
She nodded toward her laptop, sitting on the dining room table. “I did. I was able to type while holding him on my lap or when he was sleeping. It worked out really well, actually. And he kept me company so I wasn’t stuck talking to myself all day. Working from home can get lonely.”
Damian finished his bottle and Hawk took him from Alexa to burp him. He rubbed his back as he walked back and forth across the room.
“You’ve done so much to help me, Alexa, and I don’t want to take advantage of your kindness. But I’m in a bit of a situation.”
She pulled together her eyebrows. “Okay. What’s going on?”
“I have to find a new babysitter. The place I had been taking Damian is no longer good for him. But it might take me some time to find a new place. My schedule can be a challenge, and not every place can accommodate that. Is there any chance—and I would pay the same rates I paid his last babysitter, or more if you need more—if you could help me out and watch him until I found someone else.”
She stood and came over to him, standing to look him in the eye. “I would be glad to help out for as long as you need. You don’t need to pay me. I like coming over here and being with Damian. It helps me imagine what it might be like to be a mom one day. Kind of like training for when I have that job, too.”
“I will pay you. And it would only be until I find someone long term.”
“Take as much time as you need. I’m happy to help.”
Chapter 6
Alexa walked back over to her house almost dancing in joy at her major stroke of luck. No doubt Hawk thought he was the one making out in this deal having her watch Damian, but she was the real winner. She would have direct access to Hawk on a regular basis, and more importantly, to his house.
She had done some poking around today while Damian was sleeping. But he had been fussy in the morning, and she had to do some paperwork and other things, so she didn’t get as much time as she wanted to look around. Now she would have several days at least, maybe even weeks, to look around. All day without him there.
He even left his computer there. This would make things almost too easy for her. One email or incriminating correspondence, one particular charge on his bank statement, could give her plenty of information.
And to make it even better, he was going to pay her? She could still work just fine and be there for Damian. She didn’t need that income. But now it was like Hawk was paying her to investigate Hugh’s murder.
She stood in her living room, looking around. The place was a mess of boxes, some closed, some half unpacked, and other random items sitting around, needing a place to be. Tonight, she would put in a frozen pizza, drink a glass or two of wine, and focus on the house. She wanted this place to be put away quickly, especially if she wasn’t going to be there all day to work on it between doing other work.
She made it through three boxes of kitchen items when her phone rang. She looked at the caller ID and saw her sister’s name.
“Hey, Cait,” she said, tapping on the speakerphone so she could continue to work while talking.
“Hey, Lex, how’s the new place?”
“Coming along. I still have tons of boxes to unpack, but I think the kitchen is almost done.”
“Good, glad to hear it,” Caitlyn said. “I hope to get out there soon to see it.”
“Come anytime. You’re always welcome, you know that.”
“Duh. So… dare I ask?”
Alexa rolled her eyes and opened the next box. Here it comes. “What?”
“Have you met the neighbor?”
“I have.”
“And?”
“It’s actually gone much better than I could have hoped,” Alexa said.
“How so?”
“Well, you know he has his nephew. Just so happened that the baby got sick and he didn’t know what to do. I helped him out. Then, today, something happened with his babysitter. So, long story short, I’m his new babysitter and I’ll be in his house alone all day every day.”
Caitlyn blew out a long sigh. “Well, that’s great,” she said sarcastically.
“Cait. This will allow me to poke around safely. He’ll be gone for hours at a time. I can find out what he knows and see if he was involved in any way.” She opened the drawer and searched for a spot to put her cooking utensils.
“Yeah, until he comes home unexpectedly and catches you.”
“You don’t think I’m better at snooping than that?”
“I know you are,” Caitlyn said. “You used to snoop around my room all the time.”
“Exactly. And you never caught me.”
“But I wouldn’t have shot you if I had.”
“You would have yelled and screamed and maybe stuck gum in my hair.” Alexa put a stack of bowls into a cabinet.
“That’s hardly comparable to killing you. Or worse.”
“He trusts me to take care of his baby all day. He’s not going to kill me.”
“You can’t assume that. He might be extra pissed that he trusted you and you did something untrustworthy. That could actually make it worse.”
Alexa shut her new junk drawer after dropping in a roll of tape. “Then I guess I just won’t get caught is all.”
“Or you could just give it up already. You have no lack of real, paying clients.”
“Technically, Hawk is paying me.”
“What?” Caitlyn asked.
“Well, to watch the baby. But while I’m watching the baby, I’ll be researching, so he’s kind of paying me to investigate.”
“Lex, this is stupid. And dangerous.”
“We’ve been through this. You know I can’t let this one go.”
“Yes, you can, and you have to. It’s going to get you killed. Is that really worth it?”
Alexa blew out a long sigh and leaned back against the edge of the counter. “I know being an administrative assistant might not mean the same to you as me being a cop. But I dedicated my life to that work. When my lieutenant told me to drop the case it just wrecked me. It was like everything I worked so hard for was nothing.”
“But you solved lots of other cases.”
“I don’t know how else to explain it. This happens with detectives, ask any of them. You stay in it long enough and there will be that one case. The one you got close to solving, but couldn’t for some reason. The one you dream about, think about constantly. The one that haunts you. And you can’t just let it go.”
“Maybe you should seek therapy.”
Alexa pushed off the counter and bent to pick up a can opener. “No, I just need to solve this case. Then I’ll be fine.”
“But this is taking over your life. You quit your job, and might I point out this was a job you said yourself two seconds ago that was so important to you. You bought a house near the guy’s brother, and now you’re babysitting all day just to figure out who killed some guy on the street in the city? There have to be hundreds of these murders every day. Why this one?”
“There was something about it. We got so close. The evidence was weird. It’s hard to explain if you’re not in the field, but something just felt weird from the start of this one. We always knew it was a homicide, but there were red herrings, fake evidence, tampered with evidence, false leads, cleared suspects. It wasn’t the open and shut murder it should have been. And this guy had kid. That baby deserves to kno
w why he doesn’t have a daddy anymore.”
“What about the kid’s mother?”
“She died of a heroin overdose when Damian was only a month old.”
“Quality family you got there.”
“No,” Alexa said. “I mean, yeah Hugh was involved in the drug scene, but everyone around him who was interviewed said he didn’t use. I’m hoping Hawk can shed some light on that.”
“Please, I’m begging you. Find a way to let this go. That baby is going to grow up thinking Hawk is his dad. He’ll have a father.”
