*
After an awkward, quiet breakfast, Aaliyah left, saying that she’d call or text me to check on me soon. I nodded and watched her leave, a flurry of negative emotions pulling at me, but I pushed them down. Just like I had to accept that my father would never accept me as I was, I had to accept that Aaliyah wasn’t the same person she was when we were teenagers. Hell, I still didn’t even really know a lot about her. If I didn’t know any better, it was almost as if a stranger had just left me.
I grabbed my phone and called Aaron.
“What’s going on, Mase?” he asked upon answering.
“Hey, are you busy right now?”
“Not really. My wife is trying to talk me into cutting the grass, but it’s hotter than Satan’s asshole outside right now.”
I chuckled. “Don’t you have a riding lawnmower?”
“That doesn’t change the fact that it’s hot as fuck outside,” he retorted. “Anyway, what’s up?”
“Kind of have an emergency. Can you come over?”
“Something come up with the case?”
“No, it’s something personal and don’t really want to talk about it over the phone.”
“Oh shit. Okay, yeah, I’ll be there in fifteen,” he said and hung up. I straightened up my living room and washed the breakfast dishes to pass the time, Aaron knocking on the door just as I dried the last of the dishes.
“Thanks for coming over,” I said, opening the door and letting him in.
“What’s going on? Everything okay?” he asked as we walked over to the couch.
I sat down with a sigh. “Not really.” I rested my elbows on my thighs and clasps my hands together. “So first, I went and talked to Malcolm.”
“Oh yeah? How’d that go?”
“Well, he confirmed that he was moving. And Courtney’s pregnant.”
Aaron’s eyes widened. “Seriously? Damn, and the fucker didn’t even tell us!”
“Well, I found out by accident. He hinted at it when Courtney got all worked up yelling at me. Anyway, he said he wanted to get away from me and didn’t want to fear for the safety of his family by staying here.”
“Yeah, he said that. So…what’s the problem?”
I sighed. “He told my dad,” I said.
“Shit.” Aaron shook his head. “To be a fly on the wall when that bomb dropped.”
I shook my head. “It was fucking terrible, man. I invited Aaliyah to dinner thinking it would buffer my dad’s attacks, but it was as if she wasn’t even there. After berating me in front of everyone, he told me I wasn’t inheriting the firm.”
“Wait, what? You’re not inheriting the firm? What you do you mean you’re not inheriting the firm? You’re his son!” Aaron exclaimed with a frown.
I shrugged. “I mean exactly what I said. He said I ruined everything I touched and that he’d rather sell it to a stranger before allowing me to run it into the ground,” I said, bitterness creeping into me as flashbacks of the conversation filled my mind.
“I swear your dad is a fucking asshole, man. You’re one of the best divorce lawyers in the county! How does he think the firm has grown over the years since you’ve been there?”
“He doesn’t care about that. Nothing I do is enough for him. I could win every single tough case that comes my way and he wouldn’t blink twice about it. He’d just tell me that’s what I’m supposed to do and he doesn’t praise anyone for doing their job.”
Aaron shook his head in disbelief. “You know what? Fuck him, man. You’re a damn good lawyer and if he can’t see that, then that’s his fucking loss. He’s going to regret that decision if he does decide to sell to someone else.”
I gave him a small smile. “Well, thanks for having so much faith in me.”
Aaron clapped him on the shoulder. “Of course, man. That’s what best friends are for.” He snapped his fingers. “You know what else? Fuck your dad and that firm. We both have the reputation to be able to branch out on our own.”
I looked at him with a raised brow. “What the hell are you going on about?”
“Why don’t we partner and create our own firm?”
“I don’t know—”
“If your dad can’t appreciate the work you do for him, why should you keep killing yourself trying to impress someone who isn’t even looking? I was actually talking to my wife about either going to another firm or thinking about starting my own because of all the issues I’ve had with the way your dad ran things. I’ve only been sticking around because you’re my best friend and I didn’t want to leave you hanging.”
I leaned back on the couch and thought. Aaliyah had said the same thing last night, so maybe this was a sign. Starting a law firm with my best friend wouldn’t be such a bad idea either. I’d be able to get from out of my dad’s shadow, I wouldn’t have to be around him almost every day, and I could possibly start living my life for myself instead of trying to please him for the sake of inheriting a company.
“So say that we do this,” I started. “How would we even finance this kind of thing? I mean I have savings, but it’s not big enough to open a law firm.”
“Leave that up to me. I’ll talk to the wife about it and see what she thinks and get back to you on it. In the meantime, just keep your head up, man. We’ll figure this out.”
“Thanks. It just bothers me that all it took was Malcolm moving away for my dad to want to take everything from me. It’s like he didn’t even give me a chance to prove that I’m trying to get better.”
“Then leave him in the dust and start your own thing. People mostly come to the firm to see you anyhow, so you won’t be hurting for clients.”
I shrugged. “I guess that’s true. I’ll think on it some more.”
Aaron looked at his ringing phone and groaned. “Speaking of my wife, she’s calling. Probably calling to bitch about the grass I haven’t cut, so let me get out of here,” he said as he stood. I walked him to the door.
“Don’t forget to talk to your wife about financing,” I reminded him as he opened the door, revealing Malcolm on the other side preparing to knock.
“Oh, what’s up, Aaron?” Malcolm said.
“Hey, Malcolm,” Aaron said and looked back to me. “I should have some information for you by Monday.” He left with a parting wave, leaving my brother and I alone.
“What’s up?” I asked him.
“Can I come in?” he asked. I stepped aside to allow him to pass, closing the door behind him and following him to the couch. I sat next to him without a word. After last night, there wasn’t much I wanted to say to either him or my father. I wasn’t sure what there was left to talk about considering he’d said everything he’d wanted to say when I went to his house. Irritation washed over me at his presence. If he was coming by to essentially blame me for how Dad spoke to me last night, then this conversation wouldn’t end well. I was angry that he hadn’t bothered sticking up for me or at least trying to stop my father, but why did that surprise me? He’d never done that when we were kids, so why in the hell did I still wait on bated breath for him to do it as an adult?
His eyes wandered around the living room. “Things look different since the last time I’ve been here,” he mused.
I fought the urge to roll my eyes. “I’m sure it would look different when you haven’t been here in two years,” I threw back. “What did you want to talk about?”
“I wanted to come by and see how you were,” he said. I shrugged.
“Fine.”
“Last night was crazy, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Dad that mad before,” he said, shaking his head. I scoffed.
“Lucky you,” I muttered.
He looked at me. “Some of the stuff he said was completely out of line. I didn’t know that he would’ve been extreme and deny you from taking over the law firm,” he said.
I sighed and shook my head. “It doesn’t matter anymore, Malcolm. Whether you moved or not, he prob
ably wasn’t going to give it to me anyway. I’ve spent years of my life trying to appease the man so that he can see me as an individual and stop fucking comparing me to you, but all he sees are my failures and how I’m not you. You think last night was bad? It was only bad because other people were there. It’s not the first time he’s talked to me that way. Everything I do is never good enough or if I do something, it’s fucking overshadowed by something you did that he thought was better and more worthy of talking about,” I snapped.
“I didn’t know—”
“How the hell didn’t you know?” I bellowed. “Oh, that’s right, you were too busy fucking basking in the attention. You won, Malcolm. You have your wife, you have a baby on the way, you have mom and dad’s affection, and pretty soon you’ll be far away from your sex addict of a brother who won’t ruin your life anymore.” I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. “Look, I don’t care anymore. If I’m such a problem for everyone, I’ll just keep my distance. I’m sick of hearing how I’m such a disgrace and embarrassment to the family. I’m sick of people just thinking I’m weak and no one giving a damn about me being fucking hurt and devastated that I’m not enough to my damn so-called family.”
“Mason, this isn’t about me winning anything. I simply want what’s best for my family. If you can’t understand that, then you’re being selfish,” he said, his voice firm. “The things you’ve done brought consequences on people it shouldn’t have. You’re upset because you’re paying the price for something you did—”
“I’m selfish?” I chuckled in disbelief. “Malcolm, our whole life you’ve been nothing but selfish. We’re twins; we’re supposed to always have each other’s back and you’ve never had mine. For you to sit there and fix your mouth to say that you didn’t know Dad treated me like that is complete bullshit and you know it. There were plenty of times when we were growing up where you’d do something and I was blamed for it and you’d let me take the fall. You used to do everything in your power to make sure the attention was always on you and never on me unless I was in trouble. And then when years of that mental and verbal abuse take its toll on me and leads me to addiction, no one offers to see how they can help me get through it. All you and Dad do is make me feel like shit for something the both of you helped fucking create.”
“I’m not responsible for you, Mason,” Malcolm snapped. “You’re a grown ass man. If you have daddy issues then you need to take that up with Dad or a fucking therapist. I can’t help if I have myself together. I can’t help that Dad shows favoritism. You’re angry at the wrong person.”
“You should leave,” I interrupted, feeling myself becoming angry. “I don’t need you coming here with a half-assed apology only to still blame me for what happened last night. Regardless of what I did, no one fucking deserves to be treated the way Dad treated me and you fucking know it, otherwise you wouldn’t be here. So good luck in Arizona and I hope Courtney has a safe pregnancy and a healthy baby.”
Malcolm ran a hand over his face with a sigh. “Mase, me moving to Arizona doesn’t mean we’ll never see or talk to each other again. We just need space right now. Look, I am sorry about last night. What happened was shitty and I probably should’ve said something, but at the time I thought it was justified because I was still upset about what happened at Hooters. It probably didn’t help to have Courtney going on about it to when I should’ve stopped her.” He looked over at me. “Mason, you’re my brother and I love you, but things have been happening in my life that have been a result of your decisions. I know you’re not doing it intentionally, but it doesn’t change what’s happened. Seeing Dad like that was fucking scary and I’m sure if I dealt with that for years, whether in public or private, I’d probably be an alcoholic or addicted to something too.”
I stared at him without a word. Fucking finally. He put the pieces together and finally acknowledged what I’ve been trying to show them for years. He finally pulled his head from his own ass to see things in my perspective. “Well, thanks for trying to understand,” I mumbled.
“I want nothing but the best for you,” Malcolm said. “I mean if Dad has been treating you like this for years, why haven’t you left?”
I shrugged. “I wouldn’t have had anyone left. Aaliyah and I broke up and I figured you hated me, so I tried to see if our relationship would improve if he saw how hard I worked. That turned out to not be the case.”
“I never hated you. I was angry as hell, but I didn’t hate you. Even after everything that’s happened, I still don’t hate you,” he said giving me a small smile. “I want you to get yourself clean, Mase. I want my little brother back.”
I playfully rolled my eyes. “You’re only older by a minute and a half, so chill out,” I retorted.
“And that minute and a half makes a major difference,” he said with a chuckle. “I promise you I’ll be better if you can promise to work on yourself.”
“I can do that.”
“Cool. I’ll deal with Courtney and get her on board.”
“And the baby?” I asked. He gave me a small smile.
“You’ll meet them. Keeping your niece or nephew away would make me a complete asshole.”
“We’ll see what your wife says about that,” I said with a chuckle, standing when he stood.
“Like I said, I’ll deal with her,” he said as he moved toward the door. When he reached it, he turned to me and hugged me. “Keep your head up, man. One thing I’ll say is that standing your ground against Dad may change his tune. Take power back. We’re not boys anymore.”
He clapped me on the shoulder and walked out. I sighed inwardly. Today has been a complete emotional rollercoaster so far today. First, the shift of emotions in Aaliyah this morning and then fighting with Malcolm and somehow making up. I checked my watch, seeing it was only one in the afternoon. After all the bullshit that’s happened so far today, I needed a fucking nap.
Chapter 9
The next day I met up with Samson to talk about what happened over the weekend. As my sponsor, I should’ve called him after it happened, but I wasn’t interested in talking then. And after the conversation with Aaliyah yesterday, I wasn’t sure what was going to happen with my recovery. I thought I’d made the right choice by choosing her instead of being with an escort, but my feelings were becoming more involved, which was dangerous. Even more so after she’d said that she still had no intentions of being in a relationship right now. I was doing nothing but digging myself in a deeper hole and I needed a little help getting myself out.
The small coffee shop was a bit crowded, filled with college students studying for tomorrow’s class and others reading books or talking with others while getting their caffeine fix. The air smelled of burnt coffee grounds and baked goods and buzzed with multiple hushed conversations. A woman sitting at an empty table in front of me gave me a soft smile before shyly turning her eyes away from me. She was gorgeous, her light brown skin glowing as the sunlight from the window hit it. I’d noticed her watching me a few times since I’d entered the shop, her lusty chestnut eyes telling me what her mouth wouldn’t. I didn’t miss the lip biting and the way she licked her lips after taking a sip of her latte, her tongue slowly removing the whipped cream from her top lip when she looked at me. I cleared my throat and mentally scolded myself to keep my gaze off of her. She was bound to get me in trouble if I didn’t get control of myself.
Saved by the bell, Samson walked up the sidewalk and entered the shop. “What’s going on, man?” he asked standing next to the small table across from me.
I let out a sigh. “So much going on right now, I don’t even know where to start.”
“Well, let me grab a coffee and we can start with the one bothering you the most right now,” he said and walked away to the counter. I picked my phone up from the table, a bit disappointed that I still didn’t have anything from Aaliyah. I probably couldn’t expect to hear from her considering that I hadn’t reached out, but I wasn’t too sure what to say. She’d said that
she was just helping me; I figured it was best to only contact her when I needed her. A part of me still wanted her to call or text, but it didn’t change the fact that maybe I just wanted something more from her than she was ready to give.
Samson sat down across from me, blocking my view of the tempting woman. “Talk to me. What’s going on?” he asked before taking a sip of his coffee.
“The thing bothering me the most right now is this situation with Aaliyah,” I said.
“Things are already rocky between you two?”
I shook my head. “I think it’s my fault why I feel the way I do. I guess I was expecting too much from her so soon and it’s kind of…I don’t know, pushing her away, I guess?”
He leaned back in his seat and cocked his head a little. “What are you expecting from her?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’d hoped she still felt the same for me as I do for her. I mean I’ll admit that it may be a little selfish on my part to expect that from her after what I did to her, but a part of me still wishes that she had feelings for me.”
“It can be like that when you lose someone and a lot of time passes. Depending on what happened, you may think that it’s not a big deal, but it could still very well be a big deal for her.”
“I know,” I said with a sigh. “It’s mostly confusing because now sex is involved and—”
“Wait. You’re sleeping with her already? I thought you were just trying to win her back?”
Shit. I hadn’t necessarily meant to divulge that piece of information. I rubbed the back of my neck. “Yeah…it’s kind of complicated.”
“Let’s hear it. I love complicated,” he replied with a slight smirk. I sighed.
“So the night before I went to the meeting, I thought I’d have a last hoorah before trying to get myself together. I’d just had an issue with my brother and kind of just needed to get it out of my system. I called for an escort and it…happened to be her.”
“So the girl you’re trying to get back with is an escort,” he said, his voice flat.
Lawfully Screwed (Lawful Affair) Page 11
