With a swoosh, he pushed her gown to the floor. His hand traced her collarbone and then skimmed the outline of her curves. ‘You have lost weight.’
The words made her pause. She could allow this to go back to the way it had been before, when he had always taken charge. It would be easy to allow it to happen but she’d hate herself afterwards. She wanted this on her terms, not his. She needed to be in charge for once and to set the pace. She wanted to give him solace. She wanted to be different. Her limbs trembled at the thought.
Did she dare?
All she knew was that she couldn’t go back to where she’d been before, waiting for him to tire of her. Neither did she want to keep living encased in ice, pretending that she had no need of such things. The longing to be with him reverberated through her but she wanted it on her terms. As an equal. This might be her sole chance of changing things and starting afresh.
His hand moved down her body, cupping her breasts and encircling her nipples. The cloth of her chemise was rough against the increasing tenderness of her breasts. Eleanor knew she had to do it. Now. Or she’d lose herself in the pleasure of his touch.
Ignoring the growing heat inside her body, she let her hands work feverishly at his stock. ‘You are overdressed.’
‘Do you think so?’
‘I’m certain of it.’
He shed his coat, his shirt, and his skin gleamed in the sunlight. She put out a hand and touched his golden skin, felt the muscles ripple under her fingertips.
‘I want you, Ellie.’
She smiled at his endearment. Somehow it felt right when he called her that now. She pushed him back on the carpet. ‘My bedroom. My rules.’
‘You have a fine bed.’
‘I don’t want to wait for a bed or for darkness to fall or for a thousand other things to happen. I want you now.’
‘What do you mean?’ He looked slightly surprised.
She smiled, enjoying her new-found power. Before, even when they had wagered, it had been about him doing things to her—now she wanted to do things to him. She wanted to be an equal partner. ‘Always before you took the lead. I want to do things to you.’
His eyes blazed. ‘I am in your hands.’
She lowered her mouth and tasted his skin, moving slowly down his body. She took his nipple into her mouth and suckled. She heard him groan.
She slid her hand down his body, cupped his arousal. The power within him sent a hot spark arching through her. Giving in to impulse, she lowered her head and tasted the tip of him, slowly circling her tongue about him.
‘Please...’ he murmured with half-closed eyes.
She positioned herself above him and drove herself downwards, impaling her body on him. His hands grasped her hips. Slowly they began to move together. And she knew that this was much better than before. This time she was participating, calling the rhythm, and he was responding to her.
She knew that he was using her to forget, but that didn’t matter. She could accept that for now.
She ran her hands along his back, feeling the muscles tighten and release.
This time she wouldn’t fail. This time she’d find a way to make herself indispensable to him and would demonstrate that she could be the woman he needed. She would restore his world to him and he would love her for it.
‘I can do it,’ she whispered. ‘I have to.’
Chapter Thirteen
A low murmur of voices assaulted Eleanor’s ears as she and Ben entered Ben’s London townhouse after their packet journey from Newcastle. The cutter had been quick, but Eleanor had learnt there were plans to start a steam-powered line with one of Fulton’s new-fangled boats, which would make the journey to London even quicker still. The news had made her nerves tingle. It would make it much easier to carry out her plans for taking an active part in London society as well as retaining some direct control of her business.
‘Does my mother have visitors, John?’ Ben asked, arching his brow. ‘I was under the impression her At Homes were always Monday morning.’
The footman looked apologetic. ‘It is Wednesday, My Lord. Her Ladyship...’
Ben held up his hand, stopping the footman. ‘I know.’
‘Wednesday?’ Eleanor cocked her head to one side and tightened her grip on Romeo. ‘Does that present a problem? Should we return later?’
‘Tonight is the night to be seen at Almack’s. My mother will be in the throes of getting her protégées ready with final instructions. Normally I retire to the peace and tranquillity of Whites. I had hoped to spare you the trauma, but it can’t be helped. Ships will arrive on schedule and I refuse to take to lodgings.’ He paused, cocking his head to one side. ‘It sounds worse than usual—or is it that my memory is faulty?’
‘It is nearing the end of the season, sir. Expectations run high. Her Ladyship always feels it keenly, but particularly so this year. Miss Martyn is a charming girl.’
‘Quite so, John. I had blocked the full horror from my mind. Shall I surprise her, or do you wish to announce us?’
The footman looked stoically at Ben. ‘Her Ladyship specifically requested not to be disturbed for any reason.’
Eleanor tightened her grip on Romeo’s squirming body. All during the journey she had attempted not to think over much about society and the ton, or the part she intended to play and how it would ensure that Ben would fall in love with her. She had counted on being able to beg Lady Whittonstall’s assistance. Now it would seem that Lady Whittonstall was in the throes of some crisis. The last thing she wanted was to antagonise her mother-in-law when she needed her help the most.
‘Perhaps we could return later,’ she said, shifting Romeo to her other hip. ‘I’ve no wish to cause upset. Lodgings will not be too bad for one night. There is a hotel near Hyde Park where I have stayed in the past. The rooms are airy and light.’
‘Ellie, it is my house. My mother will have to yield.’ Ben gave a sudden smile. ‘Mama would be even more horrified if we went away. It is the sort of interruption she adores. To say otherwise would be to wrong my mother. She may seem formidable but she loves her family.’
Despite Ben’s easy words, Eleanor had to wonder if Ben fully grasped the essence of the problem. It was not about whether or not Lady Whittonstall would be pleased to see them, but about their arriving at the best time. For once she wanted everything to be perfect. Her future happiness depended on it.
‘I wish you had warned me.’
‘I had blocked the dreaded Wednesday afternoon ritual from my mind.’ He gave a half-smile. ‘Forgive me.’
‘There is nothing to forgive.’ Eleanor reached out her hand towards him. She would find a way. ‘We can get settled in our room and greet your mother when she has finished.’
Romeo chose that moment to wriggle free from her grasp. He bolted through the footman’s legs and headed straight for the drawing room door.
‘Romeo, come back here!’
Romeo gave a sharp bark and started to scratch the door.
‘John, what is going on out there? I thought the dogs were supposed to be in the breakfast room,’ his mother called. ‘Hero’s nerves are shredded as it is. Now, practise with your fan again, Hero dear. The way I taught you. You do not want to put someone’s eye out with your elbow, and you want them to notice your eyes rather than your lace. Concentrate and all will be well. Think about what you want to happen rather than what is happening about you.’
‘A thousand apologies, Mother Whittonstall.’ Eleanor hurriedly scooped up Romeo. Romeo gave her an unrepentant lick on the nose. ‘I am afraid Romeo heard your voice and refused to wait. Everything is under control now. We will wait until you are free.’
‘Eleanor? What in the name of heaven—? Is Benjamin with you?’
‘We have travelled a long way today, Mama,’ Ben said with a
wide smile on his face. ‘The least you can do is be civil and open the door...if it is not too much trouble to greet your only son and his wife?’
‘You talk a lot of utter nonsense, Benjamin. You are always welcome.’
Ben gave Eleanor a significant look.
The drawing room doors were flung open and Lady Whittonstall rushed out and immediately enfolded Ben in a hug. Romeo again escaped from Eleanor’s grasp and started to jump up at Lady Whittonstall, trying to lick her hand. Although she was immaculately groomed, in an afternoon gown of light rose silk, Lady Whittonstall bent down and made a fuss of the dog.
Eleanor wondered that she had ever been scared of this woman. Underneath the fashion and the poise she was Ben’s mother and a woman who adored animals.
Finally, when she had finished greeting Ben and Romeo, Lady Whittonstall turned towards Eleanor. Her eyes shone with unshed tears. ‘You brought him to me. I thought I wouldn’t see you both until Christmastime. You were quite wrong not to send word, but I instantly forgive you both. You are here now and you must stay for a long time. I want my family with me. I have such plans. We must consider how best to launch Eleanor in society.’
‘Eleanor has business in London. We shall stay only until that is concluded. Your plans will have to
give way.’
‘Of course she does.’ Lady Whittonstall enveloped Eleanor in a hug. A cloud of jasmine scent threatened to overwhelm her. ‘It is a bit late in the season but there is enough time. Eleanor shall have a taster, and then next year she can fully play her part.’
‘Time for what?’ Ben’s eyes narrowed. ‘Mother, what are you planning? Eleanor is not here to amuse you but to work.’
‘The intricacies of getting a wardrobe will be far too much,’ Eleanor said, disentangling herself from Lady Whittonstall’s embrace as Romeo gave several more excited barks and started to paw Lady Whittonstall’s gown. ‘Be quiet, Romeo. We can speak about what will happen later.’
At Lady Whittonstall’s signal, the footman captured Romeo and bundled him away. From somewhere in the bowels of the house Eleanor heard other equally excited barks of Pomeranians and knew he’d been reunited with his family.
‘At this time of year all the dressmakers and milliners have a surplus,’ Lady Whittonstall said when the noise had died down. ‘You must not use lack of a proper wardrobe as an excuse.’
‘Surplus?’
‘A death here, an unexpected pregnancy there.’ Lady Whittonstall waved a vague hand. ‘You know how it is. Life happens. There are a thousand and one reasons why a wardrobe might suddenly not be required. One woman’s loss shall be our gain. With the correct incentive you can have the right sort of wardrobe in a week’s time. Ten days at the most. I guarantee it.’
‘Impossible.’
Ben’s mouth quirked upwards. ‘Never underestimate my mother, Ellie. Her ability to organise is second to none.’
‘I witnessed the wonders of her wedding breakfast,’ Eleanor replied carefully. She might submit to a new wardrobe, but she absolutely refused to wear ruffles, boas and swathes of lace, even if it was fashionable. ‘It was truly astonishing what was accomplished in such a short span of time.’
Lady Whittonstall linked her arm with Eleanor’s. ‘That, my dear, was veritable child’s play. You are too generous in your praise. We must discuss which colours would suit you best, and if you look through La Belle Assemblée or Ackermann’s Repository you will get an idea about the different dressmakers and their styles. It is all about developing your personal flair while staying strictly fashionable.’
‘I am not generous enough in my praise. Both Mrs Peters and Mrs Nevin have remarked about your receipts for raised pie and salamagundy. They hadn’t expected you to share them so readily.’
Lady Whittonstall’s cheeks flushed and Eleanor smiled inwardly. She was halfway there already. It was one thing to read Lady Whittonstall’s list and quite another to get specific advice from her in person.
Lady Whittonstall would help develop her personal flair, and once she’d proved a triumph Ben’s regard for her would increase. She hoped that she knew enough to follow advice without being a slave to it.
She was under no illusions now about what she was to him. He used their lovemaking as an escape from his memories. Eleanor knew she wanted it to be more. She wanted to take an active part in his life, and to do that she had to be a success.
‘There will not be time to arrange for Ellie to be presented,’ Ben said, in a tone that allowed for no dissent. ‘We are here on business, Mama. For a short time only. This is to give Ellie a sampling of London and no more. The true assault, if it needs to happen, can happen next season.’
Lady Whittonstall raised an eyebrow. ‘I believe I know what I am about, Benjamin. How many years have I done such a thing? How many miracles have I engineered? Now that she is here, Eleanor will shine. Your marriage has been one of the on-dits of the season. People wish to meet her. Perish the thought that anyone should think you are cutting them.’
‘Perish that thought indeed. I wonder who could have put it in my head?’
Lady Whittonstall’s cheeks flushed. ‘That was before I knew dear Eleanor properly. Our first meeting was fraught. I have come to appreciate her many qualities. Romeo appears to be very happy.’
‘I would like to partake of some society while I am here—if it is not too much trouble and the correct wardrobe can be found.’ Eleanor made a little curtsey and watched Lady Whittonstall glow.
‘I would not worry about being presented at Court.’ Lady Whittonstall gave Ben a significant look. ‘It is frightfully dull, given the King’s health. Almack’s commands the premier position. It is far too late for this week, but the Lady Patronesses always meet on a Monday afternoon to decide the list. The question is which one of them should we approach for dear Eleanor? It is awfully late in the season...’
Ben tapped his fingers against his lips. ‘I would have thought that you would yield, Mama. Mothers can give daughters their vouchers. I will take Eleanor next week, provided you are right about the dressmakers. Why there should be this much fuss over lemonade, thinly sliced bread and dry cake, I have no idea. The dances tend to be the same tedious reels year after year.’
‘I can’t, my dear boy. Not this time. Not in the next few weeks.’ Lady Whittonstall glanced over her shoulder towards the drawing room. She lowered her voice. ‘There is Miss Martyn to think of. It would be wrong of me to put family interests first. I have given my word to her mother.’
Eleanor kept her chin up. Lady Whittonstall did not mean to be insulting, but she could see that Ben was far from happy with his mother’s response.
His smile became deadly. ‘Then Ellie will simply have to get a voucher on her own. That process should be relatively simple. After all, Ellie is your daughter-in-law. Which one of the Lady Patronesses is currently your pet source? Whom shall you demand the voucher from?’
‘You make it sound like I have some power, Benjamin, when in fact nothing could be further from the truth. One may only suggest and advise. One may never demand.’
‘Which one, Mama?’
‘Lady Sefton provided our vouchers,’ a well-bred voice called from the drawing room. ‘Isn’t that right, Mama? Lady Sefton has the reputation as being the most amiable of the Lady Patronesses. She always seems to have a kind word for everyone.’
‘Hero, you should mind your tongue. It is most impolite to reveal that you are eavesdropping.’
‘It is terribly thrilling to see the new Lady Whittonstall. Everyone will want to meet you, and I am to be one of the lucky first.’
A petite blonde came into the hall. Eleanor realised with a start that she looked very like Ben’s miniature of Alice. She had to wonder if it was a deliberate ploy by his mother to nurture similar types of women or if the majority of women in the ton looked like tha
t. All the petite blondeness did was highlight her own feelings of inadequacy.
Miss Martyn’s face broke into a wide smile. ‘You are so lucky to have black hair, Lady Whittonstall, and to be tall.’
‘Hero, you are being vulgar,’ her mother warned.
Miss Martyn quickly bobbed a curtsey as her cheeks reddened. Lady Whittonstall gave Ben a significant look, as if to emphasise why she had to go to Almack’s. Eleanor understood completely, and only hoped that Lady Whittonstall’s efforts would be rewarded.
‘Lady Sefton it is, then,’ Eleanor said positively, turning to her. ‘Miss Martyn has made an excellent suggestion.’
The young lady gave an infectious giggle. As she and her mother took their leave Lady Whittonstall imparted some last-minute advice about how Miss Martyn must refrain from giggling too loudly during the reel.
‘I trust you to do the honours, Mama,’ Ben said as the door closed behind the Martyns. ‘It should be merely a matter of contacting Lady Sefton and requesting Eleanor’s name be added to the list for next week.’
‘I will do what I can, Benjamin. With the rise of Mr Brummell things have altered slightly. There are only two Wednesdays left and then London empties for the winter. You should have come sooner.’
‘The delay was unavoidable.’ Ben’s voice might have been chipped from ice.
Lady Whittonstall’s gaze narrowed and she seemed to take everything in. Eleanor had to wonder if there was a big sign about her miscarriage stamped on her forehead. ‘I was unwell, Mother Whittonstall.’
‘But you have improved?’
‘Considerably.’ Eleanor tilted her chin upwards. ‘Sometimes things are not meant to be.’
Lady Whittonstall patted Eleanor’s shoulder and it provided Eleanor with comfort. ‘It will happen, my dear. You mustn’t doubt that. It will happen. I understand entirely.’
Eleanor bit her lip and blinked rapidly. She hadn’t expected her mother-in-law to be so perceptive. ‘I look forward to a successful visit.’
‘We both do.’
* * *
His Unsuitable Viscountess Page 20
