Jacob stopped, looking around the room at the two plates of half- eaten Chinese food, and then his eyes darted to the side of the couch. “Landon?”
Olivia watched him look at the floor at the Great American Vending Machine Company. She looked up in admission, too scared and sad and angry to make a quick excuse.
“Landon was here?”
Olivia looked at him again. “I’m sorry.”
“Where did he go?”
“I don’t know.” She shook her head. “He saw the letter and took off.”
“You got a suicide letter from his friend and he walked out?” Jacob’s fury started to build visibly.
Olivia tried to calm him down even though that was the exact question she had been repeating in her mind since he walked out. “I understand. I mean, he can’t be here. He shouldn’t have been here in the first place. He had to leave.”
Jacob looked at her, believing the words even less than she did.
“Damn it, Olivia. Stop making excuses for him. I know he used to be a good guy. No one knows that like me. But he is not a good guy anymore. Liv. He should have stayed. Or he shouldn’t have come at all. He should be the one getting this note. He should not be the one to leave.”
She stared blankly back, knowing it was true. Jacob spun into work mode, calling Jackie to handle the legal and Peter to handle the press. The next hour raced by so quickly and ferociously that Olivia barely moved. She went through the motions without taking in anything, saying only what Jacob and Jackie and Peter told her to say. A friend was about to die. Or maybe he was already dead. He was guilty of everything she had hoped he wasn’t. And as much as she tried to focus on that and as much as she knew that was what was important, she couldn’t help but recognize the parallel message it carried for her relationship. Landon was guilty of everything she’d hoped he wasn’t too.
TWENTY
Jacob marshaled the last dose of calm he could muster as he walked out of Olivia’s apartment at seven thirty in the evening. “Get some sleep.” He hugged her again. “It will be better tomorrow.”
The minute he stepped onto the sidewalk, free from the worry of upsetting her, his fury simmered over into a loud grunt. He walked vigorously, composing the speech he would scream at the governor when he saw him. He found himself muttering loudly like a crazy person as he headed down the street.
“Liar.” He almost twitched.
As he said the words, his BlackBerry started buzzing. “Crap.” He looked at the phone, not wanting to answer Billy’s call. He had been so busy practicing his rage-filled speech he hadn’t decided how he actually wanted to handle the situation. The phone buzzed again.
“Hey, Billy.”
“You still with Olivia?”
“Just left.”
“Good, good.” Billy spoke slowly. “I got good news and bad news.”
Jacob wasn’t really in the mood for either.
“Okay, give it to me.”
“The good news is we found the gov.”
“I take it that’s the bad news too?” Jacob asked, knowing the answer but now confused at how this would unfold.
“It is.” Billy’s Southern accent seemed so much more prominent when he was stressed. “Governor decided to get on a plane to New York. He’s just landed.”
Liar, Jacob screamed internally. “Really?” he asked, trying to stay composed.
“Indeed. Apparently he decided the SEIU conference shouldn’t be missed, so he caught a flight and will be there for the dinner. He said to let you know you should meet him there.”
“Ha.” Jacob let out a sarcastic laugh.
“I know,” Billy said like the teacher trying to calm the kids on the playground. Billy knew Landon and Jacob had been fighting, but as far as Jacob could tell, he didn’t know anything of the bigger issues. “I know it’s not ideal. We’re almost through this patch.”
Jacob wasn’t about to be the one to spell it out. He had dealt with enough today. “It’s not a patch, Billy.”
“Jacob,” Billy said with almost stern stillness, “you go meet him at that dinner and for tonight, just do your job. I promise tomorrow we’ll get to the bottom of this and get it fixed.”
Jacob wanted to fight, wanted to scream through the phone and quit right then and there, but he had a pang of sympathy for Billy. It wasn’t Billy’s fault and he had been through enough to last him the year.
“I know, Billy.” He thought to himself that this would be the last conversation before it all changed. “You know I have the highest respect for you, Billy.”
Billy seemed to understand that these were words of resignation, in all senses of that term. But he didn’t try to justify the importance of the race or tell him how lucky they were to work for the governor. Billy might not have known the details, but he knew the governor had changed. Drastically and irreversibly. All Billy said was, “Okay.”
“Look who decided to show up!” The governor moved jovially toward Jacob in the crowded hotel ballroom and elbowed him a little in a friendly jab.
“Actually, sir, it’s your showing up we’re all surprised by,” Jacob said. He grinned, showing full teeth to emphasize his mockingly polite sarcasm.
“Yes, well,” the governor replied with a smile, his agitation only visible to Jacob. “It is my campaign, my schedule. Listen.” He pulled Jacob in close to him, away from the group of large men that stood behind him, debating the new minimum wage bill. For a minute Jacob thought he might come clean, might say something, anything, that would make this better. “I want to be out of here in thirty minutes tops.”
Jacob started to respond with a diplomatic but totally insincere, “Of course, sir,” but Ralph, one of the union leaders, walked over to say hello.
“We are just absolutely thrilled that you could make it today,” Ralph said. He looked a lot like a much older, balding Chris Matthews. He shook the governor’s hand in an almost frantic manner.
“I am so happy to be here. SEIU has always been one of my top allies and I’m hopeful we’ll be able to strengthen that relationship.”
Jacob took a step back.
The governor continued his expressions of support and seemed to get faker with every word. “I’m just sorry I can’t stay for the whole dinner.” He looked at Jacob like he had done so many times before, expecting the all-but-reflexive answer of Yes, we need to get to something else, but Jacob saw his first opening.
“Actually, Governor”—he smiled broadly as he gently grabbed Taylor’s arm and squeezed—“you don’t have to be anywhere after this. I just double-checked and we’re all good to stay for dinner.”
The governor smiled back through gritted teeth. “You sure about that?”
“Super sure. Checked with both Olivia and Peter.”
The governor didn’t flinch. Eyes straight ahead, he looked at the heavyset union man in front of him and smiled. “Looks like I am all set to stay.”
Unaware that anything was amiss, the union guy grabbed Jacob’s hand. “Great, great. We have a seat for you too, Harriston. Great.”
As the governor and Jacob followed the man to their table, Taylor leaned in to Jacob with fury. Under his breath, he said, “What the hell are you thinking?”
The governor’s face turned a shade redder, but before Jacob had the chance to respond, another union leader pulled him away. The dinner was so packed that for the next two hours not a word passed between Jacob and the governor.
Jacob knew it was childish, but he couldn’t help indulging. He said audibly, “We’re all good on time,” and “Nowhere to go after,” enough times that the labor union kept the governor for three hours, longer than he would have ever stayed.
When they finally left, they walked in a heavy silence until they turned the second street corner away from anyone who might know who they were. The governor grabbed Jacob’s arm and spun him around. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
“What am I doing?” Jacob asked with irreverence. “I’m quitting
! That’s what I’m doing.”
“You can’t quit.” Taylor’s voice rose with anger.
“Yes, I can.” Jacob looked at him resolutely. “You’re a liar and a cheat.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes I do. You know what’s funny?” Jacob paused and almost smiled. “I thought I’d quit because you were with her, but it turns out I’m quitting because you left her.”
“Oh, that’s ridiculous.”
“I gave you everything I had. I gave you my life.”
“You work for me!” Landon screamed, losing control.
Jacob composed himself. He said a monotone, “Not anymore. I quit.”
“You think you’re going to leave this campaign? Ruin it? You think you’re going to ruin me?” He pushed his hand into Jacob’s chest. Then he stepped back and ran his hands down the sides of his suit jacket. “You won’t touch me, Jacob. I’m going to the White House and you will not get in my way. You want out? You got it. Have your shit cleaned out tomorrow.”
Taylor shot him a look of complete hatred and turned on his heel to walk through the now quiet street. He waited for a minute at the DON’T WALK sign and then stormed across the intersection, vigorously pumping his arms.
I was supposed to storm away. For minutes Jacob couldn’t move, paralyzed by fear of what had just happened and the actual consequences that would soon be upon him. And then by immense sadness. Who was that person? That man he knew so well, the guy who had been like an older brother, who joked, who inspired, who knew his family, whose family knew him—that guy was gone. This guy was unrecognizable. Five years of Jacob’s life and all the plans he’d had for the next six had disappeared with the silhouette of Landon fading down the dark side street. Jacob stood in the coldness of the January night. His hands trembled with a mix of sadness, anger, and also, relief.
TWENTY-ONE
Please come to Iowa. I need you.
It was the twenty-second pin Olivia had gotten in two days. She sat on her couch, where it seemed she had been sprawled since Jacob left. That wasn’t actually true. She had gotten up for Alek’s funeral, where she sat alone in the church with a group of people. Smaller than the number who had called themselves his friends before everything had shattered. Jacob of course, had shown up and slid in next to her. They barely spoke, knowing there was too much to say. Jacob had signed on to a new campaign already and was staying in New York for a few weeks to regroup before he started.
“I haven’t forgotten how many drinks I owe you,” she had said, “and the number should probably be tripled after last week.”
He smiled, seeming calmer than she had seen him in so long, and she envied that calm. “I’m at Quality Meats almost every night these days. You would be surprised how much tequila helps with recuperation.”
“Sure,” Olivia had said.
She knew she should be regrouping and figuring out how she was actually going to deal with the fallen pieces of her life. But as she sat on her couch, she knew she wasn’t ready yet. Billy had insisted she take a few days off. Landon, on the other hand, had come just short of stalking her. His apologies, his regrets, his love notes all came over pins, whose red lettering that once thrilled her now seemed the modern version of a scarlet letter on her BlackBerry. This morning he had started in with the pins about meeting him in Iowa. Though most of Olivia was thinking about throwing her BlackBerry out the window and hoping Tara from Page Six would walk by and find it, there was a small, admittedly dysfunctional part of her that wanted to go. She reprimanded her heart for being so stubborn and immune to logic but knew that it was also just a side effect of her exhaustion and sadness. At one fifty in the afternoon her buzzer rang.
“Hello?” she called into the monitor, wondering who it might be.
“Hey, Olivia,” said a familiar sweet voice, “I’m so sorry to bother you but it’s Robin.”
“Robin?” Olivia wondered if it was really Yanni’s assistant at her door.
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“Umm, okay, come on up.” She buzzed Robin in, completely confused as to the cause of the visit. She scanned the mess that there was no time to disguise. Her Lucky magazines, scattered around dirty clothes, were outnumbered only by Chinese take-out cartons. She opened the door, embarrassed.
“Hey, Robin. I’m a total mess and my apartment is worse.”
“Oh, please, don’t worry at all. I’m sorry to intrude. I wouldn’t be here if Yanni didn’t insist. I tried to advise against it.”
“He’s tough like that,” Olivia said with a smile, remembering walking into Vince Tilewitz’s office, mortified to be there for the check Yanni demanded she get. “Anyway, I’m sorry for the mess, but please come in. What’s up?”
“Well . . .” Robin threw a Barney’s bag on the coffee table. “I was instructed to get you clothes for Iowa and, well”—she stammered a little over the words—“invite you to go to Iowa with Yanni. He’s leaving from Teterboro in two hours. Just going till tomorrow. He said Landon wants you and him there.”
Olivia stood dumbfounded.
Robin filled her silence. “I heard about that guy, Alek. I’m so sorry. I’m guessing you don’t want to go anywhere, but Yanni and the governor actually sounded really nice about it. I know Yanni’s just Yanni, but it’s pretty amazing—I mean, Landon Taylor is about to be president and he just wants you guys there.”
Olivia smiled at Robin’s naïveté and at the pure ridiculousness of it all.
“Yeah,” she said, only to make Robin feel less uncomfortable.
Robin pointed to the bag. “I got lots of stuff at Barney’s. I only had about fifteen minutes so I hope it’s okay. It was actually really fun.” She smiled. “I figured jeans, sweaters, and I didn’t know your size exactly so I guessed. The receipt is in there so you can exchange anything or I can go back for you.”
“I’m sure whatever you picked is great. But this is completely unnecessary. You should take them back, Robin.”
“No way! Yanni would kill me. Besides, it’s great stuff! He lets me take the Barney’s card for my birthday every year. I love that place. Anyway, he’s sending his driver to pick you up in an hour.”
Olivia was so caught off guard and dazed she didn’t know what to say, and somehow “Okay” came out.
After Robin left, she looked through the bag of clothes. She pulled out an eighty-four-dollar plain long-sleeved shirt and put it on. It was the softest thing she had ever worn. She thought about calling Yanni, arguing the point, and then she rethought it. I’ll just go. It’ll be closure. Although she secretly hoped Landon would say something, anything, to change the ending.
She showered and put the shirt back on, pairing it with her favorite jeans, and then pulled out of the bag a thick, maroon cashmere cardigan that fell perfectly to the top of her thighs. It was the exact one she had coveted in this month’s Lucky. What the hell? Yanni will never take the stuff back anyway. She wrapped it around herself and stuck her hands in the deep pockets, feeling warmer and cozier than she thought possible. She looked down at the other bags and figured she should leave them as is, quite sure she would be without a job and income next week. It was part of the reason she had been quick to take Billy’s advice not to make decisions. She knew she couldn’t stay, but aside from everything else, the simple fact was, she was living paycheck to paycheck, and the thought of losing her next one was too much to handle at that moment. She brushed her hair, put makeup on, and obligingly got into Yanni’s chauffeured car at three thirty in the afternoon.
When they got to Iowa Olivia was glad she had come. Regardless of the circumstances, the cold, crisp Iowa air was a good break from the stuffiness of her apartment. Olivia opened her window and leaned out a little as they drove to Marshalltown for the get-out-the-vote event, grateful that Yanni had been on his cell phone nonstop. When they arrived, Yanni went straight in for the governor.
Olivia saw Peter, the press secretary, standing in the corner with
a blond woman she didn’t recognize. She pointed over at him. “I’m just going to say hi to our press guy,” Olivia said, buying herself some time. She still wasn’t sure what she was doing there or even how she felt about Landon. She walked to the side of the room and found Peter huddled over his BlackBerry.
“Got any good stories?” she said, coming up behind him.
“Hey!” he called out, clearly surprised to see her there, and gave her a big hug. “What are you doing here?”
“Yanni wanted to go out on the road and insisted I come.”
Peter excused himself from his conversation and walked Olivia toward the chairs on the side of the room. “It’s so good to see you. Hey, I’m sorry we couldn’t all go to the funeral.”
“No, don’t worry. I totally understand.” Olivia played it off, when in truth she didn’t understand. Friendship was friendship, and the governor owed Alek so much, at least enough to honor the man’s life, even if he had made mistakes. Game face on, she said believably, “It was totally fine. Glad it’s over.”
“Yeah.” He paused and looked over at the governor, who was stuck in a photo line. “We are losing it without Jacob on the road. Have you spoken to him?”
“A little. He’s starting that new campaign in a few weeks.”
“Oh, yeah, right. Man, that’s crazy. I still haven’t even heard what happened with him.”
“Yeah, I don’t know. Hey,” she said, attempting to change the subject, “who’s the blonde? Your new campaign hookup?”
Peter shook his head. “I wish. That’s Brianna. She’s some Web blogger or something, who, I guess, is going to start traveling with us.”
“Really?”
“Yep. I’m totally against it. She seems crazy to me, but the gov thinks it’s a good idea. And without Jacob here there’s no one to say no. You know how that goes.”
Olivia nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I do.”
Peter’s eyes followed the governor as he neared the exit. “Okay, well I gotta go grab the governor. We’re going to do drinks in the bar tonight—Ottingly and the other county volunteers will be there. Come join us!”
Domestic Affairs Page 34
