It all came back to Ana in a sharp tumble. “Right. You’re that Natalie.” Natalie, who used to organize loud sleepovers in the dorm room across the hall, keeping Ana awake. Natalie, who rarely rehearsed, but seemed to know the combinations anyway, who whispered during class and got on Ana’s last nerve. She hadn’t been sorry to see her leave school, quite the opposite. But the series of events didn’t add up. “So how are you here now?”
Natalie shrugged. “I wish I could tell you, Ana Mikhelson. I identify with that confused look that’s creasing your brow right now, as I don’t really understand it myself. That Roger guy showed up in LA and offered me the gig. It wasn’t like I could say no when I’m flat broke. So here I am. Destined for ballerina life after all, it seems.”
Ana narrowed her gaze. “Wait. He offered you a contract? No.”
“Yes.”
“That doesn’t happen.”
Natalie raised a knowing eyebrow. “Apparently it does.”
“Except it doesn’t. You’re saying Roger Eklund just handed you an apprenticeship when there’s a line of graduating seniors at SAB waiting for this very opportunity?”
“Not exactly.” Okay, that was better. Maybe Natalie was here on a trial basis before any apprenticeship was officially decided upon. Apparently they were working differently at City Ballet this season. “Not an apprenticeship. They made me a soloist,” Natalie said.
Stop the world.
Had she just said that?
Was reality as Ana knew it imploding?
“I’m sorry. A soloist? As in you just skipped over two ranks at the most prestigious company in the nation?”
“Right. Something about needing to fill a gap in the company.”
Ana took a moment, turning her head to the side as she regarded Natalie. “That’s impossible.”
A small smile crept onto Natalie’s lips. “You seem to have a lot of reasons why things can’t happen in life. Yet here I am.” She offered a little wave. “Hey.”
“Yet here you are,” Ana repeated mildly.
“Why do I get the feeling that you’re not thrilled to see me?”
“It’s not that. I just—I mean, in the past—It took me years…Do you know how many people…” For the first time in her memory, Ana couldn’t string together a series of intelligible words because the injustice at play had her thrown. Thrown.
“While you figure out the direction of that sentence, I’m going to introduce myself around, see if I can make a few friends. Good to see you again, Ana. Let’s hang out soon. Drinks are on me.” Natalie backed away looking every bit pleased with herself, and Ana cringed internally. No, no, no. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be. This Natalie girl had just waltzed in and claimed a spot that thousands would have killed for, after not even putting in the proper time? Make that zero time.
“Ana, were you looking for me?”
She turned. Roger. Right, she needed to get her game plan in order. What had she lined up to say again? “Is it true that the new dancer, Natalie, has been made a soloist?” Yeah, that hadn’t been it at all. Damn it.
He studied her with a less than interested gaze. “It’s true. We thought it was time to get some new blood in here. Shake things up with a dancer who falls slightly outside the City Ballet box.” With a twinkle in his eye, he walked away.
“Wait, Roger!” She shook her head and forced herself to focus on the goal.
“Yes?” he asked casually over his shoulder.
“I wanted to tell you how excited I am about your new ballet. I’m beyond interested in auditioning for Mira.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I always pegged you for more of a classics lover. A Balanchine enthusiast.”
“I love Balanchine. I love Robbins. I do. But I’m just as passionate about dancing new works.”
“Your style fits the older ballets. There’s a formality to the way you dance, Ana. I’m not sure you could lose it to tackle something so modern.”
She’d heard it a million times before. “Right. But Aftermath could be my chance to do just that.” She decided to put it all on the line. “I’m just asking for a chance, Roger. Please. Let me dance for you and you can make the call.”
He looked thoughtful a moment and nodded. “Meet me in studio four after lunch. There’ll be a couple of other dancers there as well. I’ll walk you through some of the variations and we’ll see. That’s all I can promise. A chance. I’ve always admired your work, Ana, I’m just not sure you’re the best fit.”
She didn’t let that last comment faze her because she knew what she was capable of. The smile hit her face before she had time to control it. “Thank you, Roger. I’ll be there.”
Ana walked away with a sense of excited purpose. She had a shot now and wasn’t about to blow it. Jason was right. This was her season, and she was ready to reach out and grab it.
*
“So what kind of work did you do in LA?” Audrey asked, her blond curls bouncing. Natalie had only known Audrey for about an hour now, but those curls had bounced throughout most of it. Natalie leaned back in her chair and surveyed the two girls across the table from her. After she’d introduced herself to a group of dancers, Audrey and her friend Helen, who also happened to be soloists in the company, had invited her to lunch at their favorite deli across the street from Lincoln Center. Of course she’d accepted. With no friends in the city, she was eager to get to know some of the company members, gauge whether or not there was any kind of nightlife to get in on. Her time in New York couldn’t be all work. Plus, maybe they could offer some insight into the inner workings of City Ballet. She already felt like she’d screwed up once with that late entrance this morning. She should maybe work on not ruffling feathers again.
“Let’s see…in LA, I stuck with devised dance, mostly,” Natalie told Audrey, focusing on the question at hand. “A mash-up of styles in which ballet, modern, and experimental are thrown against some mixed media.”
Helen, of the perfect skin and gorgeous figure, sat next to Audrey absently twisting her straw. She was African American, and if she hadn’t been a dancer, she surely could have made a go of it as a model. “Mixed media as in…”
“Video projections up against still slides, grunge music up against baroque. You name it. I’m into opposites and how they relate to each other because I think in the end everything is connected. It’s just a matter of how.”
Helen shook her head and leaned forward, captivated. “That’s so outside of anything I’ve ever done that I’m ridiculously envious of you. I’d love to work on a show like that. Explore outside-the-norm themes. Chart my own course.”
“Nothing’s stopping you.” Natalie pointed at Helen with her own straw. “Well, except the whole world-class ballet career you have going.”
“So you believe opposites attract?” Audrey asked, digging into her turkey melt and leaving a dot of mustard on her cheek in the process.
Natalie didn’t hesitate. “I think they can. Don’t you?”
Audrey shrugged. “I’m all for it. Speaking of opposites, I wish that stockbroker guy in 2D would throw me up against the wall in the elevator and make me scream his sexy stockbroker name. How’s that for opposites? It’s probably something like Chip or Blake, and I can make excellent work of a name like Chip or Blake. But in my experience, the buttoned-up types don’t do well with the less-than-normal schedule I have to keep.”
Natalie smiled at the unexpected confession. “Stockbroker guy, huh?”
Audrey nodded. “He’s like Clark Kent as if played by Jake Gyllenhaal. I want him to be my Superman love slave on the daily. Does that make me shallow?”
“That makes you Audrey,” Helen countered. “One foot gingerly in your own damn world. It’s why I keep you close by. You make me look put together.” That earned Helen a tempered glare.
Okay, so Audrey was man-crazy. That could be fun on a slow weekend. “Let me ask you something,” Natalie said quite seriously. “How does he feel about mustard?”
Natalie halfway pointed at Audrey’s cheek. “Because you have some. Right there.”
“Maybe Superman could lick it off,” Helen said.
“You’re not funny,” Audrey told her, but the smile on her face said otherwise. With her napkin, she dabbed the mustard. “Listen, I would lure that man in any which way I could. I’d paint my body in mustard if that did it for him.”
“Sigh,” Helen stated. “We have to have that talk about limits again. Do you want to end up an old mustard maid? You have to play harder to get.”
Audrey sulked into her Diet Coke.
“What about you?” Helen asked Natalie, shifting the focus. “Boyfriend?”
“Girlfriend.”
“Shut up,” Audrey said, eyes wide. She raised a fist in victory. “Finally, a lesbian in the company. Well, at least the first we know of. The boys in City Ballet have had the market cornered on homosexuality for too long.”
Helen met Natalie’s gaze. “Audrey’s a fan of diversity.”
The curls bounced again. “I am. And now I have a new lesbian best friend.”
“We’re best friends?” Natalie asked.
“Obviously. Just look at us.”
Natalie picked up on the fact that Audrey was simply being playful, but she had to hand it to them. These girls were fun, and she honestly could see herself becoming friends with them.
“So where do you guys live?” Helen asked. “You and your girlfriend.”
“Morgan’s back in LA. We’ll be doing the long-distance thing. But I’m downtown on Fourteenth Street. The company helped me snag a place at a price that won’t break me, which helps.” Helen and Audrey exchanged a triumphant look. Natalie pointed at Helen and then Audrey. “What does that mean? The knowing glance thing happening right now.”
“We’re neighbors,” Audrey explained, clearly pleased with this new turn of events.
Helen nodded. “You’re living among a ton of dancers from the company. City Ballet gets killer deals on those units on Fourteenth, as one of its biggest benefactors also owns half that building.”
“You’re kidding. We live in the same building? What floor are you guys on?”
“We share a two-bedroom on eight.”
Natalie smiled, liking the way this was going. “I’m in a one-bedroom on seven. How did I not know this was a company building?”
“You just had to ask the right folks,” Helen said. “You gonna eat that pickle?” And without waiting for a reply, she stole the spear from Natalie’s plate.
Yeah, they were going to get along great.
Chapter Four
Natalie was still amazed that she was not only back at Lincoln Center, but employed this time. She stared up at it now as they ascended the steps after lunch, captivated by the series of buildings surrounding the iconic fountain she remembered from her youth. The David H. Koch Theater was world famous, and if all went according to plan, she’d be dancing on that stage. While it wasn’t exactly the kind of work she would have dreamed up for herself, there was a history to the New York City Ballet that had her respect.
Audrey and Helen took the extra few minutes before Natalie’s scheduled afternoon session with Roger to show her the warm-up rooms just prior to the stage, as well as the costume and shoe shops, and the greenroom set aside for them to congregate. All the key spots that would help her get through the day as a member of the company.
“And you’ll need to speak to Henry about customizing your shoes. He can set you up after a brief consultation. Or you can try on a bunch of company members’ shoes and see if any of them work for you, style wise.”
“I have to have a sturdy shank,” Natalie told them, already dreading the idea of her shoes dying on her in the middle of a performance. “Or I’m done for.”
“Henry’s your man. Make him your best friend and you’ll never long for the right kind of shoe.”
“Good to know.”
Once they looped back around to rehearsal studio four, Natalie turned to them. “Hey, thanks for looking out for me today. I owe you each a drink.”
“And we plan to collect. There’s a bar across the street from our building. McKenna’s. An Irish pub. You should find a bunch of us there tonight to commemorate the first day back. Stop by and tell us how the session went.”
“I might do that,” she told them and then gestured to the door behind her. “How come you guys aren’t called to this work session?”
Audrey didn’t hesitate. “Because this session is exclusively for Aftermath, the first show of the season. Only girls in consideration for Mira were invited.”
“Who did you pay off?” Helen asked her. “Soloists aren’t often considered for leads.”
“Still trying to figure that one out for myself.”
“You must be hella good, little Miss Natalie,” Audrey said.
“I guess I’m about to find out.” Natalie pointed at them. “McKenna’s?”
Helen nodded. “That’s the place.”
Her new friends took off and Natalie headed into the studio. Inside she found Ana and her less-than-friendly vibes stretching on the barre on the far side of the room. She passed Natalie a sidewise glance before continuing her warm-up. Closest to Natalie was a tall, dark, and handsome guy on the floor wrapping his knee and across the room another couple of female dancers Natalie had yet to meet. Everyone seemed to be in their own space, keeping to themselves.
“Hey, is this the session for Roger?” she asked the male dancer quietly, feeling the library-like concentration happening across the room and not wanting to break any sort of code. Well, at least not on the first day. There’d be time for that later.
“Yeah, he should be here in just a sec. You Natalie?”
She nodded.
“He mentioned you. Welcome to City Ballet.”
“Thanks. Still a little surreal.”
He extended a hand from his spot on the floor. “Jason. I’ll be dancing Titus, at least for today.”
She knelt next to him. “I don’t see any other guys here. Does that mean the role is yours?”
He smiled, hope noticeable in his eyes. “Generally. I imagine I’ll know for sure before today is through. As should you.”
“Right.” She tossed a glance across the room at her competition. “They any good?”
Jason nodded. “The best we have. Especially that one.” He inclined his head in Ana’s direction. Her dark hair was pulled into a knot on top of her head and she wore a blue leotard with black tights underneath. The perfect body for a dancer, Natalie thought, taking in her long arms and legs. Ana was graceful, elegant, even in the midst of warm-up. “We’ve been partnered together for years, so I have to root for her. No offense. Best wishes on a killer audition, though.”
“Thanks. Sounds like I’ll need it.”
Roger had talked to Natalie a little bit about the ballet he’d be working on, and she understood that part of her reason for being there was for this particular role. He needed someone who could bring a more visceral quality to the dance, and she was ready to give it her best shot. Her only fear was letting him down.
She removed her light hoodie and rolled her now-bare shoulders, ready to get this thing going. After a few barre stretches of her own in the excruciatingly silent room, she turned as Roger joined them.
“Come, come,” he said to the group, beckoning them closer. “Let’s have a chat before we begin.” She moved to Roger along with Jason and Ana and the others, ready to hear whatever it was he had to say. “We’re going to spend the next hour learning the choreography to two different sequences from Aftermath and see where we’re at when we finish. Yeah?”
“Sure,” she said, and the others nodded and exchanged a knowing glance. Translation: we’ll see who’s still standing. Natalie decided it should be her. She didn’t come all the way to New York to dance in the corps.
<
br /> The trouble was that the combinations were anything but easy. In fact, this was some of the most complex choreography she’d yet to encounter, and half an hour in, Natalie felt like she was three steps behind and primed to fall farther as they continued. Ana, however, had yet to miss a beat, and the reserved smile she passed Natalie’s way as they headed into a five-minute break could be described as taunting at best.
“Doing okay?” Ana asked and took a drink from her water bottle.
“I’m fine. You?”
She raised a shoulder. “I’m great. I love what Roger is doing with this piece.”
Natalie wiped the sweat from her forehead with her towel and felt her calves pull from the challenges thrown her way. She’d been training with Roger diligently, but keeping up with Ana added a whole new element to the process. Ana was quicker to pick up the choreography and had this undeniable grace about her that Natalie could never duplicate. She simply didn’t come with that kind of elegance.
Roger reentered the room, scribbling something on his notepad, probably all of the things that she’d screwed up in the first half of the session. Perfect. He whispered quietly to the two girls nearest the door, and they began to pack their dance bags. Had they been cut? Was it down to her and Ana, and if so, how had that happened? Roger stalked farther into the room and glanced up at the remaining trio from his clipboard. “Can I see the realization and reversal moment between Titus and Mira? Jason, why don’t you dance this one with Ana?” The two nodded and headed to the center of the studio as Natalie took a seat along the wall.
They began to dance, slowly at first, light steps that mimicked the music. Jason reached out his hand for Ana but she stayed just out of his grasp, moving in short jumps around him. He beckoned a second time and she spun into his arms just in time for the lift. It was beautiful. Stunning even, when it came to the mechanics of the dance, but the fire hadn’t been there. The reason for Mira to give in to Titus wasn’t clear. The performance lacked the one thing she knew she could bring to the exchange: depth.
Jason placed Ana onto the floor gently and the two of them turned to Roger, awaiting further instruction or feedback. Roger simply stared and tapped his pen against his teeth, the only sound in the room. Finally, he turned to her in some sort of quiet frustration. “Natalie, would you mind?”
First Position Page 4
