He dropped his champagne glass, uncaring that it shattered at their feet, and closed his palm over her breast. He needed to feel the amazing swell of all that flesh against his palm, like he needed to feel her lips on his.
Her breast melded to his hand, her nipple brushing the very centre of his palm.
And once again, reality hit him. Not a smashing fist this time, but a shearing blade through the exotic pleasure of the new. The different.
He jerked his hand away. Tore his lips from hers. Tightened his fist in her hair and squeezed his eyes shut. “Christ, Sonja,” he ground out, confusion and aching desire warring in his soul, his body. “I…I shouldn’t have done that.”
Her hot breath fanned his lips. Her heat radiated from her. Her thighs pressed to his. Her belly, to his erection. She didn’t say anything. Not a word.
Sucking in a steadying breath, he opened his eyes and gazed at her.
For a heartbeat. Just one. And then he was kissing her again.
He couldn’t stop. A fire blazed through him, uncontrollable and unquenchable.
Sonja groaned in capitulation to a pleasure he was suddenly awakened to, the sound low and raw and wonderful. He squeezed her breast, the sensation of all that soft fullness under his fingers, in his hand detonating fresh flares of tight heat in his groin.
It was so different. So heavy and lush and incredible. Nothing like holding and kissing Levi. Levi with his hard, muscular body. Levi with his flat nipples and sculpted six-pack.
Levi with his beard that rasped Corbin’s lips and chin as they kissed and felt like fucking heaven scratching against Corbin’s inner thighs as Levi sucked Corbin’s cock down to the balls…
Christ, if Levi were here with them, right at this second, touching him…watching them…Corbin would fucking blow in his jeans.
The wild thought ripped through him, as potent as the strange desire rushing at him. Desire to knead Sonja’s breast with his fingers. Desire to press his face to the crevice between her breasts and breathe in her scent.
Desire to suck her nipple into his mouth and hear her moan as he feasted on her womanly flesh and curves and bounty.
Fuck, he wanted to feel her taut nipple on his tongue. Wanted to see if her breast was as soft and sublime on his face as it was beneath his fingers and palm.
He pulled his hand away—a little—only to be stilled in his motion.
Sonja closed her fingers over his, capturing his hand to her breast, guiding him in a fierce massage of its full curve.
She lashed her tongue over his. Nipped at his bottom lip with her teeth. She rolled her hips, stroking the plane of her belly up and down his engorged cock that was trapped by the snug denim of his jeans.
Black stars of base pleasure bloomed in Corbin’s head at the ungentle pressure on his erection. He dragged his thumb over the distended tip of her nipple, reveling in the way she shuddered against his body. He was in awe of the tiny hitching whimpers she made at his touch.
Nothing like Levi’s growls of pleasure. Nothing like Levi’s restrained groans…
So different. And yet so exquisitely perfect. So…so…feminine. And lush. And soft. And…and…
Ripe.
Ripe and there. For him. For his pleasure.
For him to taste.
He tore his lips from hers, his breath a ragged pant, stared into her eyes—half shuttered by heavy lids and thick, dark lashes—and slipped his hand between the hem of her shirt and her side.
Flesh-on-flesh contact.
Sonja let out a soft moan.
Corbin gasped in a choppy breath. “Fuck, your skin is so smooth and soft,” he whispered, trailing his fingertips up over her ribs, stunned by the velvet heat of her body. The backs of his knuckles brushed something firm and scratchy and he swallowed, his hand growing still.
Bra.
The word floated through his head, a disconnected concept attached to a need he was still struggling to comprehend.
A shallow chuckle fell from Sonja’s lips. “It won’t burst.”
Corbin swallowed again, his throat tight. “I’ve…” He stopped. Licked his lips. “I’ve never…touched…a woman…”
“Ever?”
He shook his head at her astonished question.
The hand in the hair at his nape balled into a firmer grip. “Then let me be the first,” she murmured. Her blue eyes held him captive and, with a slow smile curving the lips he’d so thoroughly tasted, she slipped her other hand under her shirt and guided him to her lace-covered breast.
Her flesh against his palm was warm through her bra. Her nipple harder, more insistent. He groaned, undone by the unusual sensation of softness. And then she was dragging the cup of her bra aside, revealing her flesh utterly to his touch.
“Oh God,” he groaned as her nipple rasped the centre of his palm. He buried his face into the curve of her neck, his exclamation nothing more than a choked breath. “So soft…so…”
“Amazing to suck,” a deep male voice declared at Corbin’s left.
Levi’s voice. Dark with barely constrained emotion.
“But perhaps you know that already.”
Corbin jerked away from Sonja, yanking his hand from under her shirt with such haste he heard the rip of cotton. He spun to his lover, heat erupting in his core. Heat and guilt and something else. Something like…regret? Frustration?
Confusion?
He stared at Levi, registering the greedy lust in Levi’s eyes, even as he saw the wretched pain.
“Levi,” he whispered, watching the man he loved regard him. His partner in everything.
Everything except this.
Christ Almighty, what had he done?
Chapter Ten
“You’ve been busy, I see?”
Levi studied them both, sliding his stare from Corbin, to Sonja and back to Corbin. His heart thumped fast against his ribs, a violent beat too fast and loud. His head throbbed. But not as much as his cock. His cock throbbed with conflicted arousal.
Watching his lover kiss Sonja, watching Corbin feel her up, had instantly turned his cock to a steel pole. And torn his heart apart.
Two weeks away from Corbin, following another possible replacement for Nick that once again didn’t pan out, had made him realize—more than ever—he couldn’t live without Corbin. He didn’t just miss Corbin while in Seattle, he’d ached for him. A visceral empty pain he’d barely survived. He’d thought about him every waking moment, wondering what he was doing, if he was okay. Often he found himself day-dreaming about the little girl lost to them, pictured Corbin blowing raspberries on her belly as he changed her nappy, pictured his lover chaperoning her on her first date, seeing him oh so clearly pacing the floors as he waited for her to return.
Those daydreams had filled him with both melancholy sadness and warm happiness. He wanted nothing more than to live them. Strangely, with each one, Sonja figured in more and more. Maybe it was because he’d always feared he and Corbin may be depriving Isabella of a mother. Maybe it was because he had no trouble remembering how wonderful Sonja was, how much he’d loved her as a screwed-up teenager.
But when he’d closed his eyes…his dreams had shifted. Fucked with him. Turned from wicked fantasies of making love to Corbin and Sonja—feisty, in-your-face Sonja—to nightmares of his father. Nightmares of the fists, the belt…the abuse.
He’d hated the sun sinking each night. Hated what was to come when he fell asleep. Hated that his hate tainted his moments on Skype with Corbin.
So he’d decided to come home. To tell his lover everything.
And he’d walked in on Corbin and Sonja making out. On the deck. Where anyone could watch. Or photograph them.
Is that what’s really pissed you off?
He ground his teeth. It wasn’t. It was the turgid mix of jealousy and arousal consuming him. He had no fucking clue what to do with it. How to react to it.
Grinding his teeth, he glared at them both.
“Levi.” Corbin’s voice flayed h
is sanity. “We…I was…Sonja…”
“Someone’s got to be here.” Sonja narrowed her eyes at him. He recognized the defiant challenge in them, though why she was pissed at him he couldn’t fathom. “Seeing as you took off.”
“Be here for what?” he questioned. He took in the ice bucket, bottle of Moët in it and the empty glass on the table. Noticed the shattered glass at their feet. “To get drunk?”
“I finished the script,” Corbin said.
Levi studied him. “Why have you been crying?”
“Because he’s grieving, for fuck’s sake,” Sonja snapped, balling her fists at her shoulders. “Jesus, Stan. Who are you now? The Levi I know wouldn’t have dismissed the death of his child without a tear, no matter how tightly wound his emotions—”
Levi’s blood ran cold. His whole body chilled. His breath choked him. A loud roar filled his head, dark and absolute. “You told her?” he whispered, staring at Corbin.
“I did.”
Corbin’s statement lashed at his nerves. He flinched, looking at his lover. “Why?”
The question left him on a breath. Every molecule in his body seemed to be on fire and yet, at the same time numb. How was that even possible?
Corbin stepped toward him, his shoes crunching the shattered glass under his feet. “Losing a baby you’ve never held in your arms but loved with all your heart fucks you up, Levi. Fucks you up, rips you apart, messes with your head and eats at your soul. But if you’re a guy—even a gay guy—the last thing you’re allowed to show is your grief. Which fucks you up even more. And I didn’t want to be fucked up. But you wouldn’t share your pain with me, babe. I told Sonja because I’ve needed to talk about it since the funeral and she was here.”
Levi drove his nails into his palms. “Of course she was here.”
“Hey, you brought me into your life, Stan,” she snapped. His gut clenched as she stepped up beside Corbin and took his hand in hers. “Don’t be getting pissed at Corbin for your stupidity.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “Bringing you into my life was stupid?”
She narrowed her eyes. “No, being an arsehole to the man you love is.”
“Fuck you, Sonny,” he snarled.
“Fuck you too, Levistan,” she shot back. “You know, when we were going out, you made it damn near impossible to get to know what you were feeling. That made it fucking hard to be your girlfriend, but I was your girlfriend and I loved being it because despite the barriers you put around your heart, you were wonderful to be with. Caring, funny. Kind. You may not have shared what you were feeling, but you made me feel amazing. Where the fuck has that Levi gone? This new Levi I’m seeing before me is a wanker. An uncaring, emotionless wanker who only wants things to go his way.”
“Fuck you,” Levi repeated, the knot in his gut twisting until he could barely draw breath. “You don’t have any clue what I’m feeling, what I’m thinking.”
“We would if you told us!” she shouted. Shouted. Anyone within a mile’s radius must have heard her. “Fuck a duck, Stan, we want to help you. We want to see your smile. We want to help you find the joy in your soul again. Corbin wants it so much he’s willing to sleep with me. But if this is the way you’re going to carry on…” She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. “I’m sorry, but I didn’t sign up for this shit.”
She turned to Corbin. “I’m sorry, Cor,” she murmured, cupping his jaw in one palm before brushing her lips over his in a soft kiss.
An inferno of instant lust and unfathomable need ignited deep in Levi’s very core. His cock throbbed. His throat slammed shut.
And then Sonja shoved past him, her shoulder slamming into his, her glare hot. Angry. Defiant.
Accusatory.
He couldn’t let her go.
Twisting at the waist, he snared her wrist, the rage at Corbin’s betrayal of their privacy infused with a hunger so raw and dark he couldn’t contain it. “Hey,” he growled, refusing to let her go. “Where’s my kiss?”
“Fu—”
He captured her curse with a brutal kiss. Took possession of her lips with his, demanding with his tongue and teeth that she surrender to him.
She didn’t. Which only fed his lust even more. His need to dominate and control. His life was a mess, his emotions threatened to overwhelm him, undo him, but he’d be fucked if he was going to surrender to that chaos. Be fucked if he was going to let it expose him. Make him vulnerable. She would kowtow to his needs, his wants, and so would Corbin.
Then he could lock his heart away again and—
She shoved him away with enough force to send him stumbling backward.
“Levi.” Corbin caught him, his hands warm and firm on his arms. “Please…”
Levi stared at Sonja, pulling air into his lungs in sharp inhalations. She stared back, her eyes conflicted, her breasts heaving, her nipples hard points beneath her shirt.
“Babe,” Corbin murmured behind him, torment in his voice as he smoothed his palm up Levi’s arm to cup his biceps. “Please…just…”
Pulse pounding, chest a hot ball of constricting pressure, Levi turned to face him. “Please what, Corbin?”
Corbin’s Adam’s apple jerked up and down his throat. His blue eyes remained focused on Levi. “Make love to me. Make love to us. Be with us. Please?”
The request sheared through the rage simmering in Levi’s core. Undid him. More surely than his turbulent emotions.
He gazed into Corbin’s eyes, petrified of finding uncertainty. Instead, he found trust. As always, trust.
His gut churned. His heart hammered. “Sonny?” he rasped, his throat a dusty vice.
“Is still here,” Corbin answered without breaking eye contact. “Doesn’t that tell you something? Doesn’t that tell you she wants—”
Levi didn’t let him finish. He buried his hands in the thick hair at the back of Corbin’s head and brought their mouths together.
Their tongues slicked over each other, battled. Mated. There was nothing gentle or hesitant about the kiss. It was just raw, open, exposed urgency and need. Levi needed Corbin, not just in his arms, not just in his bed. Needed him on a level there were no words to describe.
He fisted his hands tighter in Corbin’s hair and deepened the kiss, letting it turn savage.
Corbin groaned into his mouth, the solid ridge nudging Levi’s groin telling him exactly how affected Corbin was. Levi’s head swum. He sucked on Corbin’s tongue as he drove his hips forward, grinding his jeans-trapped erection to his lover’s thick hard-on. The friction, the pressure, the mere contact of their cocks rubbing together, even with thin shields of denim between them, sent shards of searing heat into his core. He growled, raking his hands down Levi’s back. Yanking at the hem of his shirt. Damn near tearing it in his impatience to feel Corbin’s skin.
He drove his hands under the loose cotton, smoothing them up Corbin’s back. His lover’s flesh felt like silk. Warm silk.
A shudder rocked through him. His cock pulsed.
And then someone cleared their throat behind him. A woman.
Befuddled confusion tickled Levi’s molten arousal. A woman?
“I’m going to go,” Sonja said, her voice choked.
“No,” Corbin ground out.
Levi turned to look at her, grabbing Corbin’s hand as he did so and sliding it down the front of his jeans until his lover’s fingers covered his dick. “You’re not going anywhere, Sonny.”
Blue eyes flickered. She leveled a direct stare at him. He could tell she was doing her best to hide her response to what she’d just watched. He wanted to tell her she was doing a woeful job. Her pupils were dilated. Her breath was shallow.
“I still think you’re a fucking wanker, Stan.”
“I am a fucking wanker, Sonny,” he responded. “But that doesn’t stop you wanting to fuck me, does it? And I know you want to fuck Corbin.”
He flattened his hand over his groin, pressing Corbin’s fingers harder to his aching cock. “And I want to watch
you when you do.”
Behind him, face buried into the crook of his neck, Corbin moaned softly, his erection nudging the crevice between Levi’s arse cheeks. “Levi, please…”
A lick of self-hate stole through Levi. Cold and unsettling. Why was he being such a prick to Sonja?
Because she knows you, Levi. She knows you and always has. And now she’s holding a mirror up to you and you see it all. And it fucking petrifies you that Corbin will see it all as well. Even as you want him to. Even as you want her to become the bridge that brings you back together. You want to use her, Levi. As much as you want to fall in love with her again. And that makes you vulnerable.
“Come here, Sonny,” he ordered, working Corbin’s fingers on his throbbing shaft beneath the course denim of his jeans. “Now.”
She stood motionless. Didn’t so much as blink. “We’re outside, Stan.”
“I don’t fucking care.”
Corbin’s cock twitched at the crevice of Levi’s arse.
Levi stared at her.
He knew she was his the second she caught her bottom lip with her teeth. He saw her swallow. Saw her lick her lips. And then she crossed the four steps between them—the chasm between reality and fantasy—and stood before him.
“Kiss me,” he ordered, the words a strained breath. “I want Cor to watch your lips on mine.”
Corbin’s grip on Levi’s cock grew firmer. A painful caress that sent potent pleasure into Levi’s balls.
For a split second, no longer than it took Sonja to blink, he thought she was going to defy him. Wretched confusion and hollow grief tore at him, and then she rose onto her tiptoes, cupped his face in her soft, warm hands and pressed her lips—open-mouthed—to his.
He melted into her kiss, Corbin’s pulsing grip on his erection heightening the pleasure surging through him. She swirled her tongue against his, coaxed it into her mouth and sucked it hard. Nothing about the kiss was hesitant or uncertain. Levi’s head swam with carnal euphoria. It seemed little had changed about Sonja since their teenage years. When she decided to do something, it was a case of go hard or go home.
Blame it on the Bass: Heart of Fame, Book 6 Page 14
