by Lance Berry
“I made that vow when I was a girl, and didn’t know what I really wanted…but I do now. I want you, David. I want to be with you more than anything I’ve ever wanted in my life. Make love to me, please.”
They kissed and lay down. They fondled each other gently, their fingers exploring their bodies together, gently tracing outlines and exploring pleasure points. She held him in her hand, stroking him lightly and he massaged her in return. Her breath came in short, eager sighs and she found herself atop him, rubbing herself against him as he moaned lightly and ran his fingers through her hair. He held her tight, nibbling and sucking on her neck as she continued to glide her fingers up and down his member, amazed at the fact he seemed to become even harder. She moved downward, kissing his only lightly hairy chest, his belly, and ultimately found herself kissing him below, her tongue dancing playfully around the tip. She loved him so much, and began to take him into her mouth—
No.
She stopped, eyes widening in abrupt and horrifying realization as she felt that long-ago sensation rising…
No. No, it couldn’t be—! It wasn’t fair! Not now—! She abruptly pulled away, tears filling her eyes as the nausea swirled within her stomach and she felt the bile begin to rush to her throat…
“Mara? What’s wrong?”
She gagged, fought it back, but still it pushed its way upward. She jumped off the bed and raced to the bathroom as urine suddenly began to run down her legs, leaving a trail all the way. David sat up and threw his legs over the side of the bed, watching after her in astonishment. She threw herself to the toilet, just making it as a torrent of bile shot out of her mouth, covering the inside of the porcelain. The final indignity was not just throwing up once, but that she couldn’t stop for nearly two minutes straight as she helplessly wrapped her arms around the rim and peed herself simultaneously. When it was done, she looked up in humiliation to find David standing in the door frame, staring at her in unabashed shock.
She turned away, just knowing that this would be the end of their love…
Chapter 29
“Mara…my god,” David said as he rushed to the wall rack, pulling off both washcloth and towel. He held the cloth to the sensor under the faucet, and warm water instantly splashed onto it. He threw the towel over his shoulder and knelt beside the sobbing woman. He reached out and gingerly began to wipe away the dabbles of vomit at the edges of her mouth. Mara started, her eyes wide in shock that he was still beside her, still in the room.
“Here…here, my love,” he said as he offered her the cloth instead, to ease her distress. She took it in a trembling hand and began to wipe at her mouth as David took the towel and tenderly wiped at her soaked legs. She huffed, her breath coming in short pants, and then abruptly burst into tears once more.
“Don’t. Don’t, baby, don’t,” he said softly, pulling her into his arms, her head resting on his shoulder as tears fell onto it.
“I don’t know what’s happened, and I don’t mind. My concern is you.” He then pulled back slightly, but not so much as for her to think he was in recoil. He shrugged as he gave her a once-over, and she bowed her head in shame. He cupped her chin in his hand and raised her eyes to meet his. “So I’ll just have to jerk off tonight. It’s not like I haven’t done it before.”
The laugh rose from her unexpectedly, seeming to jump out of Mara’s mouth. She hugged him tightly, and when he held her as well, she realized she had never felt so comforted in all her life. “How is it that someone as wonderful as you is in my life?
What could I have possibly done to deserve you?” she pondered aloud.
He released her just enough so that he could look into her eyes. “I ask myself the same thing about you, every day. I can’t believe God has seen fit to bless me so. Nothing that’s just happened is ever going to change that feeling, Mara. Nothing.”
They kissed softly, and Mara asked if she could have a few minutes to clean up. David agreed and stepped out of the bathroom. He walked to the bed and sat down. He looked at his uniform, scattered across the floor, and briefly considered getting dressed—but he then thought the act might convince Mara he was about to leave, and he had no intention of doing so or making her feel any more awkward about the situation. He looked at the urine stains on the floor, thinking that perhaps he should clean up, but that would mean disturbing Mara in the bathroom. So he sat patiently, waiting for her to finish in the head.
When she finally emerged, she had several wads of toilet paper in either hand. She immediately knelt and began dabbing at the urine on the deck plates. David was suddenly at her side, gently taking some of the paper from her. Wordlessly, they cleaned the floor together, and he took all the wads and flushed them down the toilet. That done, he gently took her by the hand and led her to the bed once more. This time however, he sat down and looked up at her as she remained standing.
“Tell me what happened.”
Mara sighed so lightly it was almost inaudible. She tried to speak, but a slightly louder rattling sigh came out instead.
David squeezed her hands gently. “Baby, we have to talk about this. I’ll tell you now, and this is something I was never going to discuss until the moment was right…but perhaps now it is, now should be that moment.” He exhaled to brace himself. “I fully intend to marry you some day. But part of a true union is the sexual rapport a man and wife shares. I’ve been willing to wait for you so far, because I respect you and your desire to remain sacrosanct until a wedding night occurs…but if we don’t work through this, then our union will be in part a sham. I don’t want to sound like this is an ultimatum of some sort, because it is not by any means—but we have to get through this. I know we can. Nothing can overcome the two of us, working together.”
Tears flowed down Mara’s cheeks as David had spoken, but this time they were of love, amazement and to some extent, joy.
She had never believed she could find a man as good as David, and his gentleness surprised her to no end. With a little laugh, she realized that the ballad was still playing over the ODC. She ordered the machine to turn it off, then sat beside him. She looked at him boldly, nodded once, then proceeded to tell him everything about Daniel Tallworth…
“That fucking bastard,” was the first thing to come out of David Christenson’s mouth when Mara had finished telling him about what had been done to her, so many years ago. During the course of her retelling, he had managed to keep a neutral expression on his face for the most part—the mask only slipping when she told him about Tallworth’s attempted rape of her.
Now that the story was done however, David could feel his hackles rising as he fought to relax. Daniel Tallworth was out on parole somewhere on Earth, dozens of light years from where they were; for all David knew, the man was probably married now with a family. Even if they were near Earth, there was nothing he could do; Tallworth had legally served his penance for what he had done, and the past couldn’t be changed.
Still, the idea of the man walking around free burned David to no end. He jumped off the bed, pacing around anxiously.
“I’ve never understood how any man could take advantage of a woman in such fashion! It just makes not one bit of bloody sense to me!”
“What’s done is done,” Mara said quietly. “I guess it just damaged me a bit more than I thought.”
David stopped pacing and stared at Mara, who had a disconnected, faraway look in her eyes. You stupid idiot! He thought. Stop wasting time getting bent out of shape for something you can’t do a blasted thing about, and think about her!
Mara was now sitting on the edge of the bed, and David knelt on the floor in front of her. He kissed one of her knees and took one of her hands in both of his. “Mara… there’s someone I’d like you to speak to. He’s a doctor, and a psychologist. He’s a brilliant, brilliant man whom I one day hope to have transferred to the Horizon. I think he can help you. Help us.”
“Who?”
David raised his head slightly, making certain the ODC could he
ar him. “Computer, search current service records.
Locate Doctor Benjamin Tolliver Williams.”
“’Tolliver’—?” Mara said, amused.
David raised an eyebrow. “Don’t blame me. I’m not the one who saddled him with that name.”
The ODC’s synthesized feminine voice finally replied:
“Benjamin Tolliver Williams is currently posted to the M.A.S.H.
1675 on Titan. He is the chief surgeon.”
“Perfect,” David enthused, then looked to Mara. “Will you talk to him?”
Mara looked uncertain. “Do you really think he can help?”
“I’d stake my left arm on it.”
Mara considered it, then nodded. David picked up both of their shirts and handed Mara hers. She looked at him questioningly. “I’m going to get a vid-link set up,” he informed her. “Ben may be a doctor, but he’s still a mere mortal. And one look at you in a state of undress is enough to make a priest give up the wafer.”
Mara couldn’t help but chuckle admiringly at his graciousness toward her, in spite of all they’d been through in the last few hours. He put on his shirt and sat at the desk and turned on the vid-com. “Christenson to bridge,” he called out to the ODC.
“Uh…bridge. Wilkins here, sir,” the lieutenant answered somewhat nervously. This was the Hawking, not the Horizon; Wilkins probably never dreamed he’d have any reason to be addressed by David Christenson.
“I need a clear broadcast channel to Titan, Lieutenant.
Specifically the M.A.S.H. 1675. I want it on a transpace channel.”
Wilkins’ gulp was barely audible over the ODC, but Mara heard it nonetheless. She put her shirt on and smiled at the young lieutenant’s attempts to heed to the strict bearing of the rulebook as he answered, “Sir, all out-system com-lines are restricted, barring emergencies, as per your orders. Besides, I’d have to contact Captain Stubbs—”
“Your captain is currently enjoying his first night as a married man with your first officer…or do you think it prudent to interrupt them on this matter?”
“Uh…no, sir.”
“And since I did give the order, as you so dutifully—and correctly—reminded me, I should possess the right to temporarily rescind said order, shouldn’t I?”
“Um…yes. Yes, sir.”
“Then where’s my channel?”
There was only a slight pause, and Mara imagined the by-the-book young man was taking it to consider whether or not he wanted to be a lieutenant forever. “Coming up, sir.”
“Good man.”
The ODC clicked off, and David shook his head in wonder.
“I’m not transferring him to my ship, that’s for damned sure.”
Mara laughed and finished buttoning her shirt as David received his com-line and put through his call to Titan. There was only a three-to-five minute delay as the signal headed on course for thirty-plus light-years to its destination. Finally, contact was made with the communications officer at the M.A.S.H. The young woman there was just as surprised as Wilkins had been, to be addressing David Christenson. She got over it more quickly however, and routed his call directly. After a moment, the face of a handsome black male in his mid-forties filled the viewscreen. He wore surgical scrubs and cap, and there was some blood on one of his shoulders, but it didn’t appear to be his own.
“Well, well…you’re going to live a long time, old boy,”
Benjamin Williams said pleasantly.
“I want you telling only true stories about me this time,”
David responded as he playfully wagged a finger at the screen.
“They always are, which is why you always get upset,” Ben said with a laugh. “So, how are you? What’s going on?”
David’s face abruptly turned a little darker, more serious. “I need your help, Ben. Or rather, someone close to me does.” He waved Mara over and Ben waited with an interested, curious expression for this unseen person to appear. Mara stood, realized she still didn’t have her undies on, and pulled her uniform shirt down over her nether regions as she walked over in a semi-hunched position and sat down on David’s lap.
“Hello,” she said shyly.
“Ben, this is Lieutenant-Commander Mara Elliot. We’re currently engaged in a relationship.”
Ben raised an eyebrow. “Well, hello, Mara. You must be important—outside of Malcolm Edwards, I’ve never met any of David’s friends…or girlfriends. Color me impressed.”
Mara smiled, somehow beginning to feel more comfortable around Ben Williams, even though they had barely exchanged words. There was something about his appearance, his demeanor, the phrasing of his words, which marked him as a professional.
“Ben, this is…very delicate,” David stated. “Mara and I are very much in love. We’ve just tried to consummate our relationship, but there’ve been problems… to put it delicately.”
“Which one of you is having issues?”
Mara sighed lightly and raised her hand.
A contemplative look crossed Ben’s face and he nodded once, firmly. “David, I’m going to have to ask you to leave the room.”
The captain looked at him askance. “I’m sorry—?” Ben ignored the question and continued to address Mara. “Miss Elliot…I assume that you’re seeking my help not as one of David’s friends, but for my professional expertise?”
“Y-yes…”
“Then you and I are about to enter into a professional relationship which cannot be discussed in the presence of others, no matter how close you are to them. If you choose to tell David anything about our discussion or future sessions once we’re done, that’s up to you. But I in good conscience, can not and will not discuss your personal problems in front of any other human being, no matter what.”
He glanced at Christenson again. “Excuse us, David.”
David shrugged in deference. “Well, that’s that, I guess.”
He patted Mara lightly on her thigh, and she stood up fully.
She noticed with some relief that Ben Williams averted his eyes. They suddenly went wide however, and the doctor exclaimed, “Oh for God’s sake, David, put some pants on!”
Mara turned to see David was bent over, fishing his pants off the floor—his naked posterior fully facing the vid-com. “I’m getting them, I’m getting them!”
Ben sighed and looked up at Mara’s face. “So now you know what I’ve had to put up with, all these years. My condolences to you, my dear.”
Mara laughed. She was definitely beginning to like this man…
Once David left, Mara hesitantly told Ben about what had happened in the room with her and David. Ben listened without interrupting, and then asked for a little back-story on why she thought she had reacted in such a manner. She repeated the Tallworth story, and again he listened silently yet studiously. Without telling Mara, Ben took mental note of the tone of her voice, her body language, whether her eyes met his or not while speaking. He then began asking her questions not about Tallworth, but instead about her home life growing up, her relationships with her family, their relations with each other, and about her faith.
Twice, Mara broke into tears. Yet Ben was so gentle in addressing the matter, so comforting and reassuring, it was almost like she had known him for half her life. Were it possible, she would have reached through the vid-screen to give him a hug. After her second crying jag was over, she was amazed to find she felt a little better, and was able to open up more. She told him about the mistakes she had made in her friendship with Katie Long, her feelings toward her status in the military ranks, and what her long-term goals were. He told her which actions she should take to attempt to stabilize her heart rate and breathing if she should feel anxious when being around David, but also suggested they not attempt to make love again in the near future.
