“Sharon,” Cam whispered. She wanted to reach out to her but didn’t know if she should.
“I didn’t want anyone to mess up the rug. I know it’s silly, but it helps me to know it’s in there.”
“The rug?”
“Yeah, the bathmat. She wanted to help me clean. I told her no, she should rest, but she really wanted to. We’d washed and dried the shower curtain and the bathmat.”
When Sharon looked at Cam, Sharon’s face was streaked and her eyes were a little wild. After a brief moment, she turned back toward the bathroom. “I put the shower curtain back up, and she put the rug down. When she did, she left behind a perfect handprint in the fibers. I didn’t notice it until she was gone.”
Sharon took a few steps into the bathroom and knelt on the tile beside the bathmat. Her hand hovered an inch above Jess’s indentation.
Cam thought maybe she should leave, maybe this was too intimate a moment for her to be witnessing, but she couldn’t make herself go. Instead, she stepped just inside the bathroom door.
A tear fell on the back of Sharon’s hand, and she pulled away, as if scalded. Then she laughed, a sloppy, sobbing laugh. “I loved Jess’s hands. I loved Jess more than I loved myself.”
Cam believed her.
“You told Macy you felt like another pair of hands was helping you hold on to Jeremiah,” she said.
The sting of Macy repeating that to someone was sharp, but it quickly dissolved. Cam nodded so Sharon could see it without actually looking away from the mat.
“Jess’s hands?” Sharon asked.
“Yes.” Cam took another step into the bathroom.
“I loved her hands,” Sharon said again. When she lowered her hand, it fit perfectly into Jess’s print.
Cam was certain Sharon already knew it would match.
Sharon pivoted toward Cam as she lifted her hand from the rug. “Come here.”
Cam squatted beside her and let her take her hand into hers. She held her breath as Sharon guided her toward Jess’s print, expecting at any minute she’d come to her senses and close her out. She used both her hands to spread Cam’s fingers just slightly, then she placed her hand, overlapping in every direction, into Jess’s print. Taking a deep breath, she splayed her hand across Cam’s and pressed it into the indentation, now stretched and distorted, reflecting the perfect way a family reshapes itself.
†
Macy lounged on the sofa and watched Sharon, who sat on the other end by her feet. She drew her knees up to give Sharon more room, but Sharon didn’t move closer.
Cam and Jeremiah came in from the kitchen. They were going out for pizza. A smile passed between Cam and Sharon as J-man pressed his mouth against Macy’s stomach and told his cousins goodbye.
The door shut behind them, and Macy inhaled sharply.
Sharon leaned into her legs and squeezed her knee. “Hey.”
Macy wiped away a tear. “Sorry. I still get weepy thinking about what could have happened.”
“But it didn’t. And everything’s fine.”
Macy nodded.
“So,” Sharon said and leaned back against the sofa, “what do you think about my and Eileen’s plan?”
“I think it’s very sweet for you two to alternate days staying with me, but don’t think you have to. I don’t need someone with me all the time.”
“We think you do. I can bring over my laptop and work from here. It’s no trouble.”
Macy knew if she wasn’t up front with Sharon at that moment, she never would be. She had to be sure Sharon understood. “Before you make that decision, there’s something you need to know.”
“What’s that?” Sharon cocked her head.
“It has to do with what you said about us never being together again.”
Sharon raised an eyebrow, just slightly.
“Understand that’s not acceptable to me. When this is all over”—Macy gestured toward her belly—“I have every intention of changing your mind about that. Be forewarned.”
Sharon hugged Macy’s knees to her chest and rested her chin in the crook between them. “When I was ten, my family vacationed at caverns in West Virginia. I wandered off from the others and ended up alone in a very dark place. Then my flashlight went out.” She closed her eyes. “At first I was terrified. I strained to see something in the pitch black. But then I stopped fighting it, and this incredible sense of peace came over me.”
Macy held her breath as Sharon opened her eyes and looked at her.
“When I look into your eyes,” Sharon continued, “I get that same sense of ‘I could get lost in there’—and I really like it.”
Sharon held their hands up, one against the other, and studied them. Macy was noticing that her own fingers were longer and thinner, not a perfect fit, when Sharon brought their hands to her mouth. Her lips felt dry against Macy’s skin.
When Sharon’s tears started, Macy drew her thumb along the line of moisture under one eye. Macy looked at her and knew she was ready to not look away. She knew she could hold Sharon’s gaze for always, but at that moment she wanted to hold all of her.
Macy made room for Sharon to lie beside her, longwise on the sofa. “Come here,” she whispered.
And Sharon did.
Epilogue
Macy and Sharon walked into Kenny and Dorianne’s backyard holding hands. Now that she and Sharon were together, Macy didn’t want to let go. She grew warm at the thought of their lovemaking the night before.
“You’re blushing,” Sharon whispered into Macy’s ear.
“I wonder why,” Macy said. She stopped a few feet into the yard and looked around. “Wow, Kenny’s dad is here.” She was so pleased to see the proud grandfather fussing over the twins.
“Macy, Sharon, come on over here,” Russ called out from his spot at the grill.
Hugs were exchanged among Macy, Sharon, Russ, and Eileen. The elder Ken Brewer gave Macy an awkward hug and offered his hand to Sharon.
“You’re the lawyer,” Ken said to her.
“Yes, sir.”
“Thank you for helping out my son.”
“It was my pleasure.”
Macy smiled and turned to hug Dorianne, who was holding Mya. “Hi!”
“I am so glad you could make it.” Dori looked over Macy’s shoulder. “Hi, Sharon. It’s good to see you.” She gave Macy an extra squeeze.
Macy broke free. “Let me see this little stinker.” She took the two-month-old into her arms and held her closely. “How’s my precious girl?” she cooed.
With Mya in her arms, Macy turned around and leaned in to kiss the top of Mason’s head as his daddy held him. “Hey, fellas.”
“Hey, girls,” Kenny said in a teasing tone.
Smoke from the grill carried the scent of burgers and barbecued chicken across the yard. The stronger the smell became, the closer everyone got to the grill.
Macy kept one eye on the backyard gate, watching for Jeremiah. It had taken a lot of getting used to, but she’d grown a little more comfortable with Jack taking J-man for overnights.
“My goodness,” Sharon said as Mason gripped her extended finger, “you’ve grown just since last week.”
“See,” Kenny said to Dori. “It isn’t my imagination that they’re growing super fast.”
Macy looked toward movement by the gate.
Jack shut the door behind him as Jeremiah and Bella bolted across the yard. J-man threw himself into Macy’s arms as Bella plopped onto the ground and offered up her belly for a rub. From her squatting position as she hugged her son, Macy could see Sharon petting Bella. J-man hugged Macy back, tightly. “Mama,” he said in a breathless voice, “I had fun, but I sure did miss you.”
Macy’s love caught in her throat. “I missed you, too,” she finally managed to say.
Jack stood over to the side for a few minutes before taking the last couple of steps over to his ex-wife and their son. “Hi.”
“Hi, Jack.”
He handed Jeremiah a remote-c
ontrolled car. “Here you go, buddy. Don’t forget this.”
“Thanks, Daddy.” Jeremiah took the toy and spun back around to face Macy. “See what I got!”
“Very cool,” she said.
“I can make this car race from clear across the yard!”
Macy smiled at Jack. “I’m glad you could come by for a few minutes.”
“Wish I didn’t have to work. This new job is tough, but it’s really good.”
“I’m glad.” And she was.
“I’m gonna go say hi to my mom and dad before I head out,” Jack said. He stood talking to them for about fifteen minutes and went back over to say goodbye to his son. “See you next week, buddy.”
“Okay, Daddy.” Jeremiah hugged him briefly and ran off to play with Bella.
Russ was painting sauce onto the chicken, as Eileen spread a tablecloth over a picnic table.
“I’m going to see if I can give Eileen a hand,” Sharon told Macy.
“Okay. Just don’t stay away too long.” She winked and turned toward Kenny and Dori.
“Your mama couldn’t make it, Macy?” Kenny asked.
“No. She couldn’t get away from Burke County and Harold.”
“And my mama couldn’t get away from her spite and meanness,” Kenny said. Dori elbowed him. “What?” he asked.
“Your dad might hear.” Dori nodded toward Ken, Sr., standing about ten feet away, beside Russ at the grill.
“Girl, don’t you think he’s already figured that out about her?”
Macy chuckled. She leaned closer to Dori. “No Grace?”
“I didn’t invite her.” She looked down. “I don’t need someone who doesn’t want to be around me when I have all this great family that does.”
Macy nodded.
Jeremiah ran to the gate, and all heads turned toward it. “Cam, Cam, look at what my daddy got me!” He shoved the remote-controlled car toward her.
“Wow, that is very cool.” Cam mussed up his hair and shut the gate behind her and the short redhead who was with her.
Macy couldn’t help smiling about how silly-happy and blushy Cam had been since she’d started dating Wendy.
“Why does Cam’s date look so familiar?” Eileen asked.
“Because she was one of my nurses when I was in the hospital when—” She stopped, unwilling to reference the time she had feared for Jeremiah’s safety.
Eileen and Russ nodded in unison, and Macy knew they understood.
“Hey, everyone,” Cam said as she joined the group by the grill. “This is Wendy.”
“Hey, Wendy!” they all chimed together.
Wendy laughed, and Macy liked her even more.
“Don’t forget I want to see your pictures from Grandfather Mountain,” Macy said to Cam.
“I haven’t forgotten.” She blushed a bright red. “I’ve been kind of busy.”
Macy was so happy that Sharon had invited Cam up to the mountains in North Carolina to spread the rest of Jess’s ashes. Cam had told Macy that the invitation to be at the spreading of the ashes had meant a lot, but that Sharon deciding to spread them on the mountain that held so many memories of Jess for Cam had meant even more.
Sharon rejoined Macy. “Hey, you. Having fun?”
“I am. This is great.”
“I would like to propose a toast,” Russ said. He waited a moment for everyone to turn to him. “To family.”
“To family!” everyone repeated enthusiastically.
Dori stepped to Macy. “I’ve never felt so blessed in my life.” She kissed her daughter and moved closer to Kenny to kiss her son. “I’d like to toast Macy, my true sister. Thank you for the most beautiful, most incredible gift anyone could give.”
“To Macy!”
J-man was hugging Macy around the legs, and she touched the top of his head. She smiled when Sharon gave her shoulder a squeeze. “I love you guys,” Macy said to Dorianne and Kenny. She looked around the yard at each and every one of the people who were her family, by blood or by choice. “I love you all.”
About the Author
Renee MacKenzie
As a Navy brat, Renee lived on three continents before her family settled in Virginia. She currently resides in Southwest Florida with her partner, Pam, and their poodle, Sabrina. Renee works and plays in the swamp, where she enjoys wildlife photography, kayaking, and hiking. Even though Renee has been paid to do all sorts of jobs, ranging from dental assistant to bartender, data entry clerk to maintenance worker, and field sampler to pet-sitter, she insists she’s only had one job—writer—and all the rest has just been research.
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