Fire in His Fury

by Ruby Dixon

  Gwen says his name is Liam, which is not a drakoni name. Then again, neither is Sam. But I notice that Gwen looks uncomfortable. She speaks again, telling my mate that the male has been with them for a few months, but she has not seen him this day.

  Did they not know he was a dragon? I ask Amy. No one saw his eyes? His teeth?

  They speak a bit longer and then Amy sends up to me, They thought he was sick. Skin condition. He always stayed heavily covered and did not talk much. Gwen is hiding something though. She knows more than she's saying. Look at how flustered she is.

  Maybe she is his mate, I suggest. And he is playing at being human to protect her.

  But that doesn't explain why she was so surprised when you shifted. You can't feign that.

  A mystery, I agree. One for another night. I nose her hair. You are tired.

  As if my words prompt it, my mate yawns. I am. But I need to ask more about who the other dragon's mate is. We need to find out which girl it is. Vaan can’t attack the city again. We need to flush her out and have her talk to him.

  He will want more than to talk to his mate. He will want the connection that I have with my Amy, the soothing layer of her thoughts against my own, her spirit twined with mine. I am not sure these females will agree, though, and so I nose my mate gently again. That can wait until morning. He has touched my thoughts several times today but is content to wait.

  Oh good. Man, this place is just a dogpile of problems. But she sounds happy, content. It is as if she is thriving being of such use to the others. I thought I would be jealous of such a thing, but…I love to see how happy my mate is. How much joy this brings her. Perhaps I have been selfish in wanting to keep her all to myself. I have thought about what I wanted and not about what she wanted. Now, I am starting to see that we can both be happy in such an environment, if it is the right one.

  As long as she is at my side, I do not care how many humans surround us.

  The doors shut and then we are alone in the echoing room. My mate sighs and lies down on the blankets, gazing up at me. “Alone at last,” she murmurs and gives me a sleepy smile. “This has been an interesting day.”

  I think the most interesting thing is how you took over, I tell her with amusement. My fierce little commander of a mate.

  Amy just chuckles, closing her eyes and rolling over on the bed they made her until she can reach my claws. She puts her hand on one and strokes it, as if she has to touch me to relax. I like that. “I think Gwen never wanted to be a leader. I think she just didn’t have anyone else to take the job. And I think that if we had a choice, she’d give herself up to save her sister Daniela, but I bet she feels like she can’t because she’s in charge. It’s a sticky situation.”

  We can leave, I suggest. Fly out of here and leave them to their problems. It would be what they deserve.

  “No, I want to stay and help,” she tells me with an absent caress to my scales. “It’s funny, because once upon a time I might have screamed about how wrong and evil they were for trying to sell us out, but the After changes things. Now I just see them as people in trouble trying to make the best decisions they can. I’d probably do the same thing if Claudia was in danger.”

  Her thoughts drift back to her sister. She wonders how Claudia is doing, the young in her womb…and she worries her sister is distressed.

  I lean down and let my breath trail over her hair, fluffing it just so I can feel it against my nose. The scent of her calms me, even when I feel the fires lick at my mind, like they do now at the thought of Amy leaving me. You miss your family.

  “I can’t help it,” she murmurs. “For so long it was me and Claudia, and she took such good care of me. She was the mom when we didn’t have anyone else. I feel like I’m betraying her a little every day I don’t tell her that I’m fine. I can’t imagine how worried she is.” She bites her lip and looks up at me unhappily. “I’m sorry to bring it up. I’m trying not to think about it. I know it’s stressful for you.”

  It is more stressful that my mate is upset, I tell her.

  “Can you shift so you can hold me?” she asks, gazing up at me. “I’d really like that.”

  She need not ask again. I immediately switch forms and move to her side in the bed, pulling her soft body against me. My senses fill with the scent of her and I stroke her hair even as she presses her cheek to my chest and her arms go around me.

  “Much better,” she says with a little sigh of contentment. “I don’t think we’re in danger here, and I like touching you like this.” She finds it comforting, and she needs comfort.

  I feel a stab of guilt. I have kept her from her family. I am the one that causes her unhappiness.

  “It’s okay,” she whispers, and I realize she has read my thoughts. I must have broadcast them too loudly. She strokes a hand up and down my arm. “I know it takes time for your brain to feel like yours again. We’ll figure something out.”

  I am selfish, I admit. There is a fierce, possessive part of me that wants to fly far away from all humans and hide you away in the mountains. Find a nest high up where no one can ever find you and just keep you safe and secret from the world.

  She chuckles, her breath fanning over my skin. “Not the worst idea. But I can’t just disappear and not say anything to my sister. I’d miss her, and it’s not fair.”

  I know I am unfair. I run my blunted claws through her hair. I realize this now. I have kept you to myself because it made me happy, but it does not make you happy. You like being around other people, other humans.

  “When they’re decent enough? Yeah. I do. I’ve met some really awful ones back in Fort Dallas. Gwen and the others…I actually think they’re a lot like me. They’re doing what they can to survive. It makes me want to help.”

  That is because you have a kind heart.

  “Mmm, maybe. I just have knowledge that I feel I can share for once. It feels good to be an active part of a community that works together. When we were back in Fort Dallas, there were so many days I just sat around, doing nothing because I couldn’t physically do much. Claudia would go scavenging, and Sasha would barter, and I’d…well, I’d sit at home and wait for them to get back. I accepted it because that was just how things were, but now that I see I can have more, I want to do more. I like being helpful. I like that we can give back to the world. If we can make just one small pocket of humanity happy, then we’ve done a good thing, you know? It’s important to have safe places in the world, especially for women and children. Fort Dallas is too far gone, I think. The militia has it in a stranglehold. And Fort Tulsa sounds awful. But maybe this small fort can be something better than it is.”

  Her unhappiness flares again, and I sift through her thoughts. She worries she has to choose between three things now—this fort, which she wants to help, me, who she loves, and her sister.

  You can have it all, I tell her gently. We will help these people. I will not abandon you. And after we are done here, we will go and find your sister.

  She sits up in the bed, her eyes wide with hope as she gazes down at me. “Really?”

  Truly. I caress her cheek. Just swear you will not leave me.

  “Leave you?” Her expression softens. “Oh Rast, I would never leave you. I love you. We’re two halves of the same whole now. A team. Bonnie and Clyde. Peas and carrots. Wonder Woman and…whoever Wonder Woman was dating.”

  I do not grasp any of what you just said, but I am glad. There will always be part of me that worries I will drive you away with my selfishness. I am not a good male—

  I am surprised when she rolls her eyes. “You always say that, but you are always good to me. You’re like Gwen, babe. You did what you had to do in order to survive. It wasn’t like you woke up and decided you wanted to serve Salorians because it sounded like fun. You did it to feed your family and because you were hungry. Why would I judge you on that?”

  I think of Hitaar and the last time I saw him alive. My spirit aches. I worry about family because…mine betrayed me.
My brother tried to kill me, I admit to her, and take her small hand and press it against my throat, where the white scars dance along my neck. You asked about these marks. He gave them to me. He tried to end my life.

  Her eyes go wide with shock. “What happened?”

  What always happens with Salorians. They crept into my mind and took over until I was a mere shell. I understood what I did even if I did not like it. I could not protest their orders. They owned me right down to my spirit. My thoughts fill with bitterness. I never allowed myself to return to my family’s nest. I did not want them to see what I became. Even though I was a great general in the Salorian army…to them, I was a monster. My brother saw me when I was visiting a neighboring nest. I destroyed them in the name of the Salorians, because they were withholding tithes that had been promised to the overlords. I close my eyes at the memory. Hitaar was a gentle spirit, like you. They were his friends. He could not believe what I was doing. I saw in his eyes that he loathed me. I shifted back to my two-legged form to show him that I was yet his brother and offered him my hand. He turned away. When I turned my back to him, he attacked me. Tried to kill me with his claws. A wry smile touches my mouth. Even in his rage, he was a terrible fighter. He tore at my throat but not enough to kill me.

  “That’s so awful,” Amy whispers, and I can feel her hurt as she aches for me.

  It was. I remember the feeling of utter betrayal. Of hollow, empty anger as I realized what my brother had done. I was truly lost in that moment, covered in my own blood and that of a neighboring nest. Of a family I had known when I was young and unblooded. I slaughtered them without a second thought, all because my Salorian overlords commanded it.

  “What did you do?” she asks, her mind gently probing at mine.

  My masters did not like what happened, of course. It is against Salorian law to attack a general. Even though I was bleeding from my wounds, and even though my heart was breaking, they forced me to subdue Hitaar and bring him back to Salorian lands. He was conscripted and forced to serve in the army like me, his mind cracked open by their foul magic. I think of my gentle brother and my spirit aches so fiercely I cannot stand it. Dragging him in was worse than any wound in my throat.

  It was because of me that he died. I will always remember that.

  “It wasn’t your fault,” my Amy tells me, her voice sweet. She caresses my face, her touch grounding me, forcing the fires of despair to the back of my mind. “He made his choice, just like you did. He knew what he was doing was wrong.”

  Or he simply felt he had no other choice, just like the humans here. I catch her hand in mine and press my lips to her palm. This is why I do not trust. This is why I am afraid I will lose you if your family finds you.

  You’ll never lose me, she sends fiercely.

  Her thoughts are so full of love and understanding that I ache with the realization of what I must tell her. Even if I am the one that holds you apart from your sister? I know they have searched for you. I felt it.

  Amy goes still beside me.

  I can feel her hurt, her confusion, and the possessive, furious flames surge ahead in my mind. The rage threatens to boil over.

  What do you mean? she asks, her thoughts faint as my own threaten to go wild.

  I felt the touch of a mated male’s mind back at our old nest. I knew it must be your sister’s mate, and I sent him away. I show her the signal I sent, the wordless warning of a mated male’s territory and for him to leave. I knew it was wrong and I did it anyway, because I wished to keep you to myself.

  She is silent. I am afraid to probe at her mind, to feel her dismay and her betrayal. I do not want to feel her love for me dying away. It will break me completely and I am already tenuous.

  Moments slide past with aching silence. All the while, the fury builds in my thoughts, waiting to overpower me. Waiting for my mate to reject me so I can lose myself to the madness once more. I will let it reclaim me, too. I have no wish to be aware of who and what I am if she hates me.

  “Oh, Rast,” Amy says softly. She moves forward and presses her mouth to mine. “I could never, ever hate you. Never think that. I’m hurt, yes, but I understand what you did. I love you. In the future, we need to talk these things over, though. Like I said, we’re a team. I would never abandon you to stay with my sister. You’re my soul and I’m yours.” Her smile is achingly beautiful as she gazes at me with trust and love.

  I am not worthy of such devotion. I hold her close, not kissing her, just pressing my face to hers. The fires die back, soothed by Amy’s love. Was ever a drakoni male so lucky? Never. They have never had my perfect, wondrous, beautiful Amy.

  Wherever you wish to go, I will follow, I vow to her. If you wish to return to your sister, I will take you there. If you wish to escape this place, I will be your wings. If you wish to stay, I will be at your side. You are my everything. There are no thoughts, no words that can express what you are to me.

  Maybe we can show it with touches instead of words, she tells me, and gently brushes her mouth against mine once more. Her hand slides low on my belly, and she caresses my cock. Let me love you the way I’ve always wanted to.

  I go still underneath her. You mean—

  Yes. I want that. Her thoughts are bright, shining with devotion. There is no ugliness between us, Rast. A mating—any mating—can be nothing but beautiful. I choose you every day. I choose you for all time. And I choose to have you in my body, so why not in my mouth? It loves you as much as the rest of me does.

  I growl low, because she makes it sound so enticing, and yet it feels forbidden. It is not a drakoni thing.

  I am not drakoni, she reminds me, and begins to press light, teasing kisses to my chest. Does that make you sad?

  It does not. I would change nothing about her. I thread my claws through her soft hair and hold her close even as she lets her lips move over my skin. You know it does not.

  Then let me love you like a human would. Lie back and let me pleasure you. Her eyes gleam with enthusiasm and I cannot deny her this. I cannot deny her anything.

  With a sly little grin, my mate moves lower, kissing and licking down my stomach. My entire body tightens in response when her tongue flicks at my navel, because I know where she is heading. It feels like the most wrong and decadent thing ever…and I cannot deny that I want to feel her mouth there.

  That's because it will feel amazing, she tells me. You like mating face to face, don't you?

  I do. I like being able to look into my Amy's eyes as I plunge into her and bury my cock in her tight cunt. I love seeing the look on her face. I love being able to kiss her when I thrust into her. Both ways are equally good ways to mate, but there is an intimacy to her way that has a special appeal.

  This will be very similar, she promises even as she slides a hand to cup my sac. It will be different, but so good. You like putting your mouth on me. Of course I'm going to like the same.

  How do you know? You have never done it. My thoughts are strained, because all I can think of is the feel of her hand against my sac, caressing it.

  She giggles and lightly strokes my sensitive flesh. Because it's you. I love kissing you. I love your scent. I love everything about you. Why wouldn't I love this?

  Why indeed? I have no answer. I cannot think of anything but my sweet Amy's mouth as she kisses lower. Part of me wants to bolt from the bed, to flip her onto her hands and knees and claim her. The ache in my cock tells me it would be good, so good. But a more curious part of me wants to experience this. Am I not changing to meet her needs, I reason. I have shorn my claws, something no drakoni would do. I have mated with her face to face. I can let this happen.

  Her fingers curl around my shaft and she gives it a slight squeeze. “You're so hard here, but your skin is so soft. It's amazing. I've wanted to touch you like this for so long.” Her little sigh fans her breath over my length, and I realize how close she is to taking me in her mouth. She is but a finger-length away, and I am straining not to grab her head and push h
er lovely mouth toward my cock.

  “I'm going to explore you first,” she whispers against my skin, and her fingers slide over my length, touching and learning my shaft the way she has wanted to for days on end. I am in her thoughts as she caresses me, and I can feel her wonder and pleasure at how it feels, how she is attuned to my responses, my sharply inhaled breaths. It makes the sensations that much more intense, and I do not realize I am growling with pleasure until she chuckles. “Shall I stop?”

  No. I do not want that. Not anymore.

  Amy runs her fingertips over the head of my cock. She traces the rounded head of it, then moves one fingertip along the ridge of thicker skin along the top of my shaft. “It's almost like you're scaled, but in a different way than when you're a dragon. Like you're so tightly overlapping that it feels like skin, but when I see this, it looks like scales. It's fascinating.”

  My cock jerks in response to her touch, and she breathes a pleased little sigh when droplets of my come bead atop the head. She drags her finger in the wet spend and circles it along my cockhead, teasing me with every moment she does not take me in her mouth as she promised. I never thought I would want something so much. I want to watch as she takes me onto her tongue, I want to see the look on her face, feel her thoughts when she tastes my flavor…and then I groan aloud when I feel the excitement in her mind at the thought of doing such a thing.

  She feels powerful right now. Sexy and powerful. Her arousal scent perfumes the air, making my cock even harder for her. It takes everything I have to remain lying down on the bed next to her, because the mating urge is strong within me. But how can I take such pleasure from my mate? How can I reject such pleasure myself?

  “I'm going to put my mouth on you now,” Amy murmurs.

  Why are you telling me before you do so? My thoughts are strained with the effort of remaining still so she can touch me as she likes.

  She chuckles again. “Because I don't want you rearing back and knocking me over?” She leans in and her breath fans over my lower stomach, my cock. “And because it's fun to tease you.”