Hartstrings: A Jaded Regret Novel (Jaded Regret Series Book 3)

by L. L. Collins

  I met Natalie’s gaze, who hadn’t said anything since she walked in the door. “Yes.”

  I expected a snarky comment from one of them, but it didn’t come.

  “Where is her boyfriend now? Did they arrest him?” April’s soft voice made me glance over at her.

  “No. They can’t find him. He’s a police officer, and Mac says he’s dirty. They issued an APB for him, as well as a restraining order, but that doesn’t matter unless they find him. So I’m keeping her safe.”

  “We are keeping her safe,” Beau said. All of us shifted our gaze to him. The man only spoke when he felt it necessary, so to hear him stick up for a woman he didn’t know spoke volumes to me. April wrapped her fingers with his and smiled.

  “That’s right,” she said. “We’re her family now.”

  I heard the door open to the guest room, and we all fell silent as Mac made her way into the family room. I stood to help her with the wheelchair, but she waved me off. She pushed it with her good arm and stopped next to the couch.

  “Mackenzie, meet Jaded Regret. Bex, Johnny, Beau, his wife—April—and Natalie, our manager and Beau’s sister.”

  “Hi.” Mackenzie tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, a slight blush creeping up her cheeks. “Did I interrupt?”

  Bex stood and walked over to Mac. “No. We’re here to see you. It’s nice to meet you, Mackenzie. Tanner speaks very highly of you. We’re glad you’re okay, and we want you to know that we’re all going to be here for you. A friend of Tanner’s is a friend of ours.”

  Tears shimmered in Mac’s eyes and she nodded. “Thank you. You have no idea how much that means to me. I don’t have many friends, and certainly not any that would put their lives on the line to keep me safe.”

  “No one’s life is on the line,” Johnny said. “Unless it’s your asshole boyfriend. We’ll put all our resources into taking this guy down, Mackenzie.”

  Mackenzie’s gaze settled on us. “I have to say; it’s so surreal to be here with all of you. I’ve admired you for a long time. It was strange enough when I met Tanner, and then he wanted to be my friend. Now…all of you are here for me.”

  Natalie finally spoke up. “You’re safe here. Tanner doesn’t open up to just anyone. Hell, we’ve known him for five years, and this whole thing has shocked all of us. You’re special, Mackenzie. It’s time for you to realize that.”

  My heart swelled. It took a lot for Natalie to say that. While Mac and I were friends, I knew what Natalie wanted with me. It also reminded me that I closed myself off from them for a long time. While I wasn’t ready to give them my entire sordid history, sharing Mackenzie with them was the beginning of opening up.

  Maybe.

  “Are you thirsty? Hungry?” April asked Mac.

  “Could I have some water?”

  Idiot, I admonished myself. Why didn’t you see if she needed anything? “I’ll get it. Anyone else want anything?”

  “I’ll help you.” Bex followed me to the kitchen, and I knew I was about to get the third degree.

  I pulled water bottles and a few sodas out of the fridge. I could feel Bex staring at me. “Go ahead, Bex.”

  “What?”

  “The reason why you came in here with me. Spill it.”

  Bex grinned, taking a can of soda from me. She popped the top and took a long pull before setting it down on the counter. “I know you’re deep into this, and I don’t blame you for intervening. We’re all in this together now. But…” She paused. “I want you to be careful.”

  “What do you mean? That asshole isn’t getting to her or me.”

  She shook her head. “That’s not what I mean. With our security, I don’t think he’ll be an issue.”

  “Then what do you mean?”

  “She’s…vulnerable, Tan. She’s been through a hell of a lot, and now she’s under your roof.”

  “Bex.” I took a drink of my water, giving myself a moment before responding. “I’m keeping her safe. I know she’s vulnerable. I also know it’s a moment-by-moment decision for her to stay here. I’m not dumb enough to think she’ll never think about going back to him, especially if he finds her and talks to her. I know all about guys like him.” I didn’t need to elaborate how I knew that.

  “Okay. I see how you look at her, though, Tan. And if I see it…”

  “How I look at her? What do you mean? You’ve been here for ten minutes—only five of those she’s been awake.”

  “It only took me ten seconds.” She picked up her soda and guzzled it again. My mind reeled. What the hell was she talking about?

  “I don’t understand what you mean. Ten seconds for what?”

  “To see you look at her the way I’ve never, ever seen you look at any female. Not the conquests you take back to your hotel room, not the ones who throw their bras at you. None of them.”

  I laughed. “Bex. Your imagination is running away with you today. It’s not like that.”

  She smirked. “If you say so, Tanner. Keep up the image you want us all to see. She’s damaged and needs help. If you can’t be a friend to her, you need to be honest with yourself.”

  Anger sparked in my belly, spreading like wildfire throughout my body. “You’re pissing me off, Bex. You don’t need to worry about my intentions. Despite what you may think, I can keep it in my pants.”

  Bex grabbed her soda and a water for Johnny and turned around. “It’s not you keeping it in your pants I’m worried about. I’ve seen a huge difference in you since we left on tour, and I knew all along it was about her. I didn’t realize how deep you were in already. I’m worried that you’re going to take your heart out of your chest and hand it to someone who’s nothing but screwed up right now, that’s all. We all want you to be happy, Tan, but I don’t think you know what you’re getting into.”

  * * *

  Mac and I sat on the couch, watching some chick flick she found on television. I wasn’t really paying attention to it. Instead, I texted with Brandon about Andrew. There was no sign of him, despite them canvassing his house and his dad’s house around the clock. They’d put a trace on his phone and credit cards. The man had disappeared.

  I knew better. He was somewhere. Watching Mackenzie.

  We hadn’t left the house in over a week. The band came here and hung out. We weren’t practicing this week, still recovering from our tour. Mackenzie had gotten close to April and Natalie in a short amount of time. She told me that April reminded her of her childhood best friend, McKenzie Konoski, whom Andrew had forced her to stop being friends with. She liked Bex too but said she still intimidated her.

  Mackenzie talked to her dad daily. He begged her to come home and let him take care of her, but she refused. He settled for talking to her on the phone, but I knew he didn’t like it. I had a hard time believing that he didn’t know before she ended up in the hospital that Andrew beat Mackenzie on a regular basis, but I tried to give the guy the benefit of the doubt because it did seem like he cared. Even if he was snowed over by Andrew the Asshole.

  He hadn’t heard from Andrew either and told her not to worry about what he may try to do to him. That didn’t stop her from worrying, of course, but Andrew hadn’t surfaced.

  It scared the shit out of me. Not that I would admit it.

  Mac sighed and laid her head on my shoulder. I stopped what I was doing and kissed the top of her head. I had never been so comfortable with any female—except Tracey. I wanted to ask her what we could do now about Tracey, but I didn’t want to push her. Mac still needed to rest, and I knew if she thought I wanted her to work on the case, she would.

  Mac had to learn to say no.

  “What’s wrong?” She was much stronger than she was a week ago, no longer needing the wheelchair. She was seen by a doctor over here a few days ago and was healing well.

  “Nothing. I wish guys in real life were like the ones in these movies.” I lifted my gaze to see what she meant and found myself watching with her. The guy brought his girl flowers at work and th
en surprised her with a picnic at the park, where he proposed. His speech was one for the record books as he spoke about his love for her and how she completed him as a person.

  I reached out and squeezed her fingers. “There are guys like that. Andrew isn’t the example of all men, you know.”

  “I know.” She tilted her head back so she could see me. “You’re a nice guy. A great guy. But I don’t see you doing those things, either.”

  I zeroed in on her plump pink lips. A surge of lust flooded my system, and I fought against the urge to pull her to me and kiss her until she was breathless.

  Holy mother of God, Tanner. What the hell are you thinking? No. No damn way.

  Bex’s warning resonated through my head, and I glanced away. “I’m not a nice guy. I use women for what I want with them and then walk away. Then again, I guess the girls I attract do the same thing. I’m not a forever kind of guy.”

  Mac was quiet for a few minutes; her hand still tucked in mine. “I don’t believe you.”

  “You don’t believe what?”

  “That you aren’t a forever kind of guy.”

  I laughed. “You haven’t read enough about me in the rags, huh?”

  “Oh, I’ve read plenty. But you know how you can figure me out so easily? Well, I can do the same with you, too, Tanner Hart.”

  My heart skipped, and I rubbed my chest. She didn’t know me. No one did. And if she knew the thoughts going through my head right now, she wouldn’t be sitting with her hand on my leg and her head on my shoulder. My thoughts were proof that I didn’t deserve a woman like her.

  Here she was, trusting me to be her friend and support her through the worst time in her life, and my dick grew by the second at the thought of spreading her out on the couch and having my way with her.

  “There’s a guy like that out there for you.” I decided I needed to focus back on her. “But I have a question.”

  “Go ahead.” She thankfully dropped the topic of me.

  “What are you going to do about Andrew? What if he shows up here? What if he calls you? You know he isn’t going to hide forever. Are you going to walk away from him for good?”

  Mackenzie turned the television off and shifted, so she stared straight at me. “You aren’t scared to ask the hard questions.”

  “Well…we’ve been hiding out here for a week avoiding this very topic. I love spending time with you, Mackenzie. You’re welcome to be here for as long as you want to be here. But you need to decide what you want to do with your life. Are you going back to work?”

  “I have to be done with him,” she answered.

  “What happens when he shows up and demands you to go back with him? When he tells you to change your story? When he tells you that you are nothing without him?”

  “Tanner.” Mackenzie brushed a few tears away from her cheeks.

  “Let me tell you something.” I knew I should shut up and let her figure this out herself, but I couldn’t stop. “Do you understand how amazing you are?”

  She shook her head and opened her mouth to protest, but I held up a hand to stop her, and she flinched. My mouth dropped open at her reaction, followed immediately by my gut clenching.

  The second she realized what she did, more tears began to fall. “I’m sorry.”

  I grasped her hand and pulled her gently toward me until she was so close she was almost in my lap. “Mackenzie. I would never hurt you. Ever. Even if I was mad, which I’m not. This is not what you deserve.”

  “I know you wouldn’t. I don’t know why I did that.”

  I reached my hand out and traced the bruises that remained on her face. “I know exactly why you did it. You’ve spent formative years with a guy who made you think that him hitting you was something you deserved, that it was part of a normal relationship. You believed it. You may believe it right now. But I’m here to tell you, to promise you, that a real man never hits the woman he loves. Ever.”

  She nodded. “I can’t go back to him. Ever again.”

  “Even if he threatens your dad?”

  Mac bit her lip. “Yes.”

  “Even if he tells you he’s sorry, and he loves you?”

  “Yes. If he loved me, he wouldn’t hit me.”

  Hope bloomed in my chest. “Right. Do you believe that, or are you just telling me what I want to hear?”

  “Sitting here with you, I believe it. Seeing him in front of me may be a whole other story.”

  “If I have anything to do with it, you won’t see him in front of you ever again. But what about work? Do you want to go back home?”

  A flush crept up her cheeks. “I-I like it here. That is if you don’t mind me being here. For the first time, I feel like I have people in my life who like me for me.”

  “You do. And you’re welcome to be here as long as you want. Can you work from here? I can set you up a home office.”

  Mac smiled. “What did I ever do to deserve you?” She leaned over and pressed her lips against my cheek before she settled back against the couch.

  I wonder the same thing about deserving you.

  * * *

  It was the night of our local concert, and we were backstage, all of us preparing for our show the way we always did. Except this time, Mackenzie was with us. She wore a Jaded Regret T-shirt, fitted jeans, and had her long blond hair piled on top of her head in a ponytail that April helped her with. When we arrived at the arena, she saw the shirts and had to have the one that said “Tanner Hart can play my bass.” She thought it was hilarious.

  In the past, I’d taken quite a few of those off some of my groupies.

  I tried not to think about that as I saw the way the shirt fit her.

  April and Beau’s daughter, Olivia, was smitten with Mackenzie, and she sat on her lap, amused by the necklace she wore.

  “You ready for this, Mac?” I knew she was extremely excited about being at the concert tonight.

  “Beyond ready.”

  “You’ll go with April to the front row, okay? AJ will be with both of you.”

  She nodded. “Got it. I’m so excited!”

  I leaned over and kissed her cheek. When I stood, I caught Bex’s reflection in the mirror in front of me. She watched us, a small smile on her lips before she turned back to Johnny and her kids.

  “Maybe I’ll join your groupies tonight,” Mackenzie joked. “I’m wearing a hot pink bra for the occasion.”

  April laughed and rolled her eyes. “Oh, God. Don’t inflate his ego bigger than it already is.”

  It wasn’t my ego that was inflated.

  “There won’t be any groupies tonight.” The only date I planned to have was with myself. In the shower.

  Mac snapped her fingers. “Oh, darn.” Her face became serious. “Wait. Is this because of me? You don’t have to…”

  “No,” I interrupted her. “It’s not.” Yes, it is totally because of you. “We’re going home after the show. Okay? Make sure you stay with AJ.” I turned away before I said any more. “You guys ready?”

  “Ready.” Bex kissed her kids and April and Beau kissed theirs, leaving them with the nanny. It was a tradition that they came with us to the show and then the nannies would take them back home (or back to a hotel if we were traveling).

  “Hey, Tanner?” Beau and April’s son, Robbie, stopped me as we reached the door.

  “Yeah, buddy?” We bonded over playing together when Beau proposed to April. I loved that little dude.

  Robbie surveyed both of us before leaning closer to me. “Is she your girlfriend?” His voice was barely a whisper.

  I smiled. “No, dude. She’s a friend of mine.”

  He nodded. “She should be your girlfriend, Tanner. She’s super pretty, and nice too. My sister likes her a lot.”

  I ruffled his hair, and he frowned at me. “I’ll keep that in mind, kid. You staying for the show?”

  He nodded. “Yeah. I’ll be with my mom and Mackenzie. My dad said I’m old enough to get to hang out here now.”

&nbs
p; “Have fun, buddy. See you after.” I watched as he grabbed his mom’s hand and they walked together to get their seats. Just before they disappeared through the doors, Mac glanced back at me and smiled.

  “Good luck,” she mouthed. Then she did something that shocked the shit out of me.

  She showed me her pink bra strap before disappearing.

  Chapter Twelve

  Mackenzie

  You are a stupid idiot, Mackenzie Shepard. What in the hell did you do that for? You don’t flirt with guys. You don’t flirt with Tanner Hart, the hottest guy in rock music.

  I stood next to April, listening to the crowd go crazy waiting for Jaded Regret to take the stage. The local band that opened for them just finished. I had no doubt Jaded Regret would help them get to the next level in their careers, but I couldn’t wait to see them out there in their element.

  AJ stood right next to me and allowed me to lean on him a little as I tried to keep the pressure off my casted foot. He was a beast of a man and made Tanner seem small, and that couldn’t be further from the truth.

  “Have you ever seen Tanner play?” April asked in my ear. I shook my head, and she smiled. “Oh, you’re in for a real treat. They are something else all together up there.”

  I saw Natalie peek her head out from backstage and then disappear again. The lights dimmed, and the crowd went crazy as the sound of Tanner’s riff exploded through the arena. I learned a lot in the last week and a half. Before that, there was no way I could tell you what a riff was.

  Within seconds, the rest of the band joined in, and Bex’s sultry voice came through the speakers. The lights flooded the stage, illuminating the band in technicolor. Despite how loud the crowd was at the sight of their favorite band, I sang along with every word.

  When Tanner walked up next to Bex, the bras started flying, as well as the lewd comments. April and I exchanged a look and then laughed in unison. He was gorgeous, as always, in a dark pair of jeans and a tight black shirt. His muscles flexed and moved as he played. His cropped blond hair shone in the lights, and I could see the brightness of his eyes from here.