Pacing back and forth over the plush carpet I’m faced with inner turmoil. I fucked up tonight. I acted like a cocky animal, pushing her to every limit she could’ve possibly had. If she even wants to see me after this I’ll be more than surprised.
Motherfucker.
Every feeling within me is sending my mind all over the place. I want her to be in my bed. I want to hold her at night and not have to let her go back to Miss. Bianchi. I want to have Blanka alongside me on whatever adventure we choose. Yet, why do I act like such an asshole when she’s with me?
Is it because I wanted the other men to see I didn’t give a fuck about her, so they could convey to Miss. Bianchi how I act like a vile man? Possibly. Deep down, maybe it was part of my plan. But the reality of our situation is how I’m lashing out from my anger of not being able to control much about our reality. Instead of making progress, I’m taking it out on the woman I . . . immensely care for.
I head to the bathroom and turn on the cold water, putting my hands together in a bowl shaped form and splash my face. Anger. Torment. Chaos. Confusion. I feel them all coursing through me, further complicating my thoughts. I was hopeful the water would help knock me out of this, but it doesn’t.
Instead I’m staring at my reflection. Only, I don’t know if I truly see myself.
The man staring back at me is one I can hardly recognize.
Bloodshot eyes from drinking too much alcohol. Dark, messy, unruly hair. Hands balled up into fists on the side of the sink, so much force causing my knuckles to be white. I’m no longer a man at this point in time— instead, I’m a beast.
Pulling my right hand back I throttle my fist into the mirror, causing it to split out and shatter from the impact. I’m pissed at the world. Frustrated with God for sending me a woman who had to be in this industry, for making me interested in someone I can never have. Or at least, someone I can’t have in the ways I desire yet.
Women like this are contracted, needing to fulfill their roles before their Madames will release them. I hate how my hands are tied in a sense, and there’s hardly anything I can do. Being a man as powerful as myself it makes me feel inferior. I loathe how I can’t just snap my fingers and solve the issue as I typically can.
I glance down at the blood oozing from my now open wound and the idea hits me all of a sudden. Everyone who’s ever met Blanka knows she’s too good to be working in the sex industry. She should be in a relationship making the man she loves happy as can be with her sexual goddess routine. Her heart is pure, unlike my own. I’m not saying she’s virginal in any sense, but I’m no angel.
I fucking want her more than I’ve wanted anything in my entire life, and yet I find ways to fuck it up every time I see her.
Looking back at my reflection, I vow to make a promise here and now. I will get one more week of time with her, and then I’ll personally see to it that Blanka is no longer indebted to Miss. Bianchi. She is far too good for this job.
I want her to be happy and have everything she deserves in this world.
But more importantly, I want her to be free.
Although, another revelation hits me. I don’t just care for this woman. I’ve fallen in love with her.
I’m not a master in love by any means, but I’ve read the books and watched the movies. When you love someone, if you love them truly, you let them go.
Chapter 14
Belladonna/Blanka
I woke this morning from the light reflecting off the ocean waters. Though, I was more surprised how I was left alone. In the past month I’ve been with Davide he’s never left me to sleep by myself. Instead, he’s always lying beside me, or holding me against him with his chin buried in the crook of my neck.
I won’t claim to know the man entirely, although I do know things about him. I know he’s a strong worker and his work ethic is amongst the best I’ve seen. I could tell you he hates pork and the mere smell of it makes him gag. He prefers gold over silver because he thinks it clashes with his eyes. When you spend time with someone, you begin to understand the ways certain things make them tick.
I take a long hot shower, wanting to use this time to relax. I stay under the water for about ten minutes longer than I need to, exit the shower and blow dry my hair. We’re in Greece, so I figure having it in a long wavy style won’t hurt. It looks a little beachy and cute.
After I’m in a floral romper I packed with a pair of flat sandals I head upstairs to the deck the saloon is on. Outside of it by the hot tub there was a giant oval shaped area where I believe is where we eat our meals.
As I’m coming up the stairs I see Davide is already awake, sitting on the opposite side from where I’m approaching. He has on a pair of matte black sunglasses, is wearing one of those sea blue beachy shirts and has a pair of swim trunks on as shorts from what I can tell. Overall, he looks relaxed.
I notice how eerily quiet it is, so I turn to look around and don’t see another soul. “We docked at Linaria a couple hours ago. Jasper, Hugo and Raquel were up early and got off the ship to explore the island.”
“Are you a mind reader now?” I ask.
“No, not quite.” He replies, sipping on the cup of coffee in front of him.
A woman with a dark green shirt like the crew member I saw yesterday comes up to me, “What would you like for breakfast, Miss? We have scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, meats, pancakes. If you don’t prefer any of those our chef can make you something special.”
“Scrambled eggs and fruit would be perfect. Could I also get a hot cappuccino if you have the ability to make them?”
She nods her head, “Certainly. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
“I didn’t think you’d be up so early. Though, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t glad to see you.” Instantly I feel like something is different about him. He isn’t normally so sweet, especially for no reason. Davide has a habit of being a cocky person, not a nice one.
The woman comes back and brings me not only my drink, but my meal as well. I eat while Davide chats with me about a variety of things, which is just as unusual as his sudden attitude change. We’re making small talk, learning things about the other which we hadn’t previously discussed. I can’t put my finger about it, but there is something different going on here.
“Would you like to go off into town and see some of it?” He asks, and I accept.
Davide and I spend about three hours walking around town, seeing the beautiful white buildings with their deep sea blue shutters. Everyone we run into is kinder than the one we met before. It’s as if Greece is from an entirely new planet.
He ended up taking me in some small family own boutique after he caught me staring in the window of the shop. I didn’t mean to stare so much, but there was this beautiful knitted bikini in a deep burgundy color that caught my eye. The most amazing part of it was the way designs were sewn into it, making it even more unique than others I’ve seen similar to this.
After speaking with the older woman working in the boutique we discovered her granddaughter is hopeful to one day become a fashion designer and she was the one who actually made the bikini. Davide bought it for me and gave the woman some money to put towards her granddaughter’s education fund, telling her that things such as this are a gift.
Again, he’s been continuing to act in a kind manner. I feel as though I’m not even spending my day with him. I wonder if I should ask if he’s feeling okay, or whether he got bit by something? He could be ill like one of those people on the parasite movies. The common theme is how their behavior begins to change.
No, I must be paranoid. Maybe this is just the fresh ocean water helping him relax. He could normally be like this. I’ve only ever been with him when he’s working . . . not when he’s on a luxurious vacation.
Davide continues to parade me around town until we charter a private boat to take us out to a small island just off the shore. When we arrive there’s a table set for two with a bottle of champagne on ice, lunch and even a couple of men with dif
ferent types of instruments.
This is beginning to feel like a date, and less like a job. God, it’ll only make things more dangerous for the both of us.
“Why have you brought me here, Davide?” I ask out of the blue, as we approach the table.
He stops, takes my hands and looks at me with compassion. “Because I want to make things right with you. I’ve been treating you poorly, and it isn’t right. I . . . would like it very much if I just had this night to make things up to you, to apologize for my behavior.”
Is this part of the game he’s been playing?
No. It can’t be.
Confused, I try to search for the answers. “Davide, you don’t owe me an apology. This is my job.” I state, declaring that things are solely in a professional manner between us. Even though I feel something in the pit of my stomach whenever my eyes land on him.
“Yes . . . yes it is. Though, I’ve been making things entirely more difficult for you, and I’m apologizing for that. Now, please . . . may we have dinner and enjoy one another’s company?”
Taking in a deep breath, I nod and the two of us continue to the table and take our seats. Davide pops the champagne and pours me a glass before he pours himself one. He hands the flute of champagne back to me and toasts to new beginnings. It doesn’t make much sense to me, so I brush it off.
This is the last few days I will enjoy seeing Davide Lupei, because as soon as I get back to Venice I’m going to request that Miss. Bianchi match another woman with him. She’ll ask why and I’ll have no choice but to lie to her and tell her I can’t stand the sight of him.
Hopefully she won’t be able to figure out he’s the only person I want to see, even with all his flaws— I want him. I’ll simply never be able to have him.
Chapter 15
Davide
Throughout this amazing day we’ve spent together, I’m making it a point to show this woman I can treasure her and treat her in the way she deserves. God, I can’t wait to leave early tomorrow morning and make my trip to Venice. It’ll be the moment I change Blanka’s life. She’ll no longer be contractually obligated to work for Miss. Bianchi. Instead, she’ll have the freedom to choose whatever path she wants to venture down. Whether it be living in a small cottage in a rural land, or in a city looking down over the busy streets. I’d be lying if I said I don’t hope she chooses me, though.
In a sense, I’m suddenly showing her the kinder parts of me because I hope she’ll choose me. She’ll choose us— and the potential of what kind of life I can give her.
We’re sitting on the back of the yacht, laying on this platform that’s like a hammock. It’s above the water and the sounds of the boat moving over the sea is more relaxing than I could ever express. Thankfully, we’re alone and I’ve never been more grateful. We simply lay side by side, staring up at the bright stars.
“I’ve seen many things in my life, but never something as beautiful as this.” I declare.
“The stars are gorgeous,” Blanka agrees.
I struggle to hide my laughter. “I was talking about you, silly woman.”
She appears to be shocked for a moment, but the sweetest smile crosses over her face. “You’re being so kind to me. I like it. Shows you’re not always a jackass.”
“I mean, I can be.” I state playfully.
Blanka giggles loudly at that, and before she can finish her bout of laughter I decide to ask her something else. “What do you want to do with your life, after all this is over I mean?”
“After what is over?” She questions.
“Your work at the brothel,” I reply.
“Honestly? I just want a normal life. I don’t want anything grand or exciting. I just want to live in a city, have neighbors, know the butcher who I buy my meat from by name. I just want the simplicity of living.”
Simplicity. What a beautiful thing to want. “It sounds like a dream,” I say, wondering what my own life would’ve been like if I weren’t born into a Clan family.
“Yeah, well, life in the Czech Republic as a child wasn’t so simple. It was . . . hard,” Something in the tone of her voice tells me her struggles started in childhood.
“I’m not going to push you to elaborate, but if you will . . . I’d like that very much. I enjoy learning more about you, Blanka.”
“My mother . . . she tried to support my sister and I . . . but it wasn’t enough. Regina, that’s my sister, well, we both decided to get a start in the sex industry when we were far too young to be in it. You know? We didn’t have a choice. Our mother could only afford the utilities and rent. It was up to us to keep food on the table. I . . . I think that in life I chose to do whatever I needed to make my dream as you call it a reality. I worked myself up in the industry and started working for Miss. Bianchi. My sister on the other hand . . . she turned into a backstabbing drug addict who will do whatever she needs to undermine you.” A rough childhood and a shitty sister. Blanka hasn’t been very lucky.
“Have you seen her in a while, your sister I mean?”
Blanka sighs heavily, “Yeah. She recently just came crashing into my life again. I’m only wondering how she’s going to fuck it all up.” Noted. I’ll have to consider keeping some of my men on a surveillance assignment where they watch this Regina.
I look up once more at the stars and realize it’s getting late. I’ll have to get up and leave in about five hours, so I need to wrap up this most amazing evening. I roll onto my side, removing my tie from around my neck after we had a beautiful candlelit dinner on the upper deck a few hours ago and wrap it over Blanka’s eyes. The tie acts as a blindfold. “In everything you’ve confessed to me tonight, you tell me how you desperately crave one thing— passion. I want to give you that, Blanka. Will you let me?”
Her response barely comes out in a whisper, “Yes.”
Positioning my body over hers, I press delicate kisses against her flesh while my fingertips run against her skin. Her body shudders against mine in anticipation. I’ve thought about this for far too long, and I don’t want to rush it. I want to take every waking moment and show her what I can be like with her if she’ll let me. More than that though, I want to show her how I can love her body like I love her soul.
Chapter 16
Belladonna/Blanka
After a long day of travel I’m ready to get back in my bedroom, take a long bath and destress. The last few days have only confused me more than I was before. Davide lashes out at me like a starved lion, and then treats me with the tenderness a queen should experience. I genuinely don’t understand him. On top of it, I didn’t think he could fuck with my head more than he already had . . . but here we are.
My taxi drops me off at the front steps and I get my bag out, head up the stairs and enter the brothel. It’s busy with men, women and the other working girls. I don’t see my sister so that’s a relief and figure I’d better head upstairs pretty quickly if I’m going to save myself from running into her or Galina. Honestly, Galina pissed me off so bad. I know she didn’t know Regina’s an addict, but as my friend she should’ve come to me first to ask if it was even okay she try to pull some strings for Regina. Shows me what kind of friend Galina really is.
I’m able to make it up to my bedroom and toss my bag on the floor. Normally, I’d take it down the hall and start some laundry but not today. You see, I’m not just exhausted in the physical level, but the emotional as well.
I strip off my clothes, throw them in the laundry basket I have hidden in my closet and head into my bathroom. Turning the hot water on, I put a hefty dose of rose essence in the tub and allow the steam to slowly heat up the bathroom.
By the time I enter the water it feels like my entire body is on fire, but after a minute it starts to dissipate. I don’t understand why it’s so calming to roast yourself to death in a bubble bath, though I’ve always enjoyed it.
Leaning my head back against the ceramic, I close my eyes and breathe in and out deeply. Before I realize it, almost an hour has passed. I ho
p out, dry my hair off and get into a new outfit, put on a light layer of makeup and head downstairs.
“Hey, I heard your client made an offer Miss. Bianchi couldn’t refuse and whisked you away,” Lila, one of the other working girls tells me.
I giggle lightly, not acting like it’s anything special. “I’m sure he did. The man likes to throw his money and power around all over the place to get what he wants.”
Lila narrows her eyes in on me, “And what did he want, Belladonna?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask.
“Don’t you know?” She questions.
“Davide cancelled his contract with the brothel. Miss. Bianchi made an announcement about it this morning. She seemed very pissed about the whole ordeal.”
Fuck. This isn’t good. “Thanks for letting me know, I need to go.” I say, rushing past her I swiftly walk to Miss. Bianchi’s office and slip in through the small doorway. I think about leaving the door open, but I don’t want anyone to pry and this conversation could get ugly.
Miss. Bianchi peers up from her thickly rimmed glasses, pulls them off her nose and places them beside her laptop. “I’m sure you’ve heard by now.”
I nod, confirming her suspicions. “Yes, Lila just made me aware. Did he say what happened?” It couldn’t have been because of me. There’s no way . . . but if he even gave her the slightest impression of that . . . I’m fucked.
Miss. Bianchi cackles, and not in the good way. “You must’ve fucked up massively to make him cancel his contract, Belladonna. Honestly, I never expected this from you. You were my best girl. Tsk, not anymore. Do you know how much money we’ve lost now? Not just you and me, but all the other girls from the friends he was sending our way.”
“I’m s-so sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?” I offer, wanting to rectify the situation as soon as possible. I’m even more confused than I’ve been all day. Last night things were so different between us. It didn’t feel like a man fucking me. He wasn’t rough at all, instead he was gentle. It felt as if Davide was making love to me. I can remember every time his lips brushed against my skin, and the feeling of his fingertips sliding over my arms.
Venomous (The Clans Book 11) Page 8
