by Emma York
“Please, I’ve changed my mind. Let me go.”
“No chance.”
The words were whispered in my ear but they had the force of a sledgehammer, slamming deep into me. This was what him being in charge meant. I had completely lost control of the situation.
“It is time,” he said, leaning down and almost kissing me but not quite, his lips half an inch from mine. I could smell him, I could sense his heat so close. The fear in me was still there but in that moment it became mingled with something else, something I didn’t know how to define. Was it desire? Could I desire something that scared me?
I wanted to ask him what he was going to do. I wanted to tell him to free me, scream for help. But I kept silent. I wasn’t even sure why. I just couldn’t say anything.
He moved out of sight. I counted the seconds, waiting, hoping his hands might fall onto me, slide between my legs, ease the ever growing ache that had yet to subside, even as the fear had grown in me.
The pain hit me without any warning at all. One moment all was silent. The next there was an echoing smacking sound so loud it made my ears ring. For a split-second I didn’t know what it was. Then the nerve endings in my ass shot a signal to my brain.
I’d been spanked. He’d slapped my right buttock, making it sting enough for me to cry out in pain. “Ow!”
I tried to wriggle away from the stinging sensation, impossible though it was.
When he spanked me for a second time, I screamed, the feeling was too intense. I couldn’t handle it.
“Quiet!” he hissed at me. “Do you want to disturb the entire hotel?”
I heard him moving and turned my head in time to see him in the case once more. Why didn’t I tell him to stop? Why didn’t I make him untie me? Could it possibly be because I wanted him to do this. Did I still want him to spank me despite my fear?
I caught a glimpse of what was in his hand when he stood up, a flash of curved steel. I thought I knew what it was but I couldn’t be sure. He wouldn’t do that to me, surely? Not when we’d only kissed once.
I felt the bed shifting as he climbed onto it, straddling my thighs, pushing me down into the mattress.
His hands were on my ass a second later, caressing, groping, roughly squeezing until I couldn’t help but moan. Did he know he was pushing my clit against the edge of a blanket underneath me? Was he deliberately teasing me?
“What is that?” I asked as I felt cold metal between my buttocks. I wanted him to reassure me that it wasn’t what I thought it was.
“A gift,” I replied. “From me to you.”
“No,” I begged, knowing I had been right, the tip of it nudging towards my ass, getting ready to invade me. “Don’t.” But there was no force to my voice. I felt I had to protest. I couldn’t admit to wanting him to do that, to wanting him to use my body any way he felt fit.
That was the power of my submitting to him. I didn’t need to think about anything. He could decide what happened. All I had to do was let it happen. But good girls wouldn’t let things like this happen without protesting. I couldn’t openly admit I wanted that plug in my ass, no matter how much my body was ready for him.
“Too late,” he replied.
It pressed forwards and as it widened and stretched its inexorable way into me, I couldn’t help but scream at his audacity, at the sheer overwhelming blissful pain of it.
His hand jolted away at the same moment as my scream died. What was that? Tell me that wasn’t what I thought it was.
Knock.
It was. It was what I thought it was. I hoped it was someone who worked at the hotel, come to check on the noise.
Because if it wasn’t an employee, most likely it was Anna. If it was her, she would be coming for our scheduled meeting, come to check I wasn’t falling for the seductive techniques of one of my employees.
“Hold on,” I shouted, twisting in place as there was another knock.
Please don’t let it be Anna. Let her be late or drunk in the hotel bar. Because if it’s her, I’m going to have to admit the truth, that I had no willpower at all, that I had only to let him kiss me once and I was his, that I had no hope at all of turning him down after this, whatever he had planned, I was going to let it happen. I would just have to deal with the consequences afterwards.
I twisted in place, glancing around as best I could.
Knock.
Knock.
TWELVE - BILL
It was who I thought it was. After Lucy had shouted, “Hold on,” she twisted her head towards me. “Untie me,” she said.
This time she meant it. This time I did as she said. The dynamic we’d had, whatever bubble we were in, it had been rudely popped by the person waiting on the other side of the door. I took one last look at her ass before undoing the knots that bound her ankles together. I would come back to that ass as soon as I could. But first, we had to deal with this situation.
Moving up the bed, I untied one of her hands, leaving her to undo the other knot as I gathered up her clothes, tossing them to her as she sat up in bed.
“Not yet,” she hissed as I crossed towards the door. “Do you want them to see me naked?”
I paused, watching as she quickly dressed, feeling a strange sorrow passing through me as that magnificent body disappeared behind the dress. She slipped it down her legs as I turned to the door. Just as I was about to open it, I heard a squawk behind me. I glanced back to see her grabbing the butt plug and shoving it under the pillow beside her.
She nodded at me and I opened the door. On the other side was a concerned looking maid, peering straight past me into the room, her eyes fixing on Lucy. “Yes?” I said, drawing her attention back to me.
“Sorry to trouble you, Sir, Madam. One of the guests heard screaming coming from in here.”
“Yes, that was us,” Lucy said, walking to stand next to me. “We were practising.”
“Practising? You were practising screaming?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“And why were you practising screaming?”
“Oh, you tell her, darling,” she said to me. “You explain it so much better than I do.”
“Thanks,” I said through gritted teeth before fixing a smile on my face. “It’s a form of voice training we learned in Switzerland. Great for the vocal chords before a conference.”
“Right,” the maid said, looking more confused than ever. “Well, if you could try and keep it down, that’d be great.”
“Of course. Good night then.”
“Good night, Sir, Madam.” She gave us both one final look before turning and walking away. I closed the door after her and leaned against it.
“Practising screaming?” I asked, trying not to laugh.
“I panicked,” Lucy replied. “I couldn’t think of any other reason.”
“How about because I was spanking a very naughty girl?”
She blushed furiously. “I didn’t ask you to do that.”
“But you did want me to.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Are you sure?”
She looked at me, her mind clearly trying to process what had happened. I could tell exactly what she was thinking. She had loved it but she couldn’t admit it. Why she couldn’t admit it, I didn’t know but I’d seen that expression on plenty of subs in my time. They needed to let go of control but it wasn’t easy to do. My job was to show her how good it was to let me be in charge of what happened to her, to let me dominate her mind, her soul, and most importantly, her body, every last inch of it.
“Why did you bring that?” she asked, nodding towards the case. “What else is in there?”
“Lots of things.”
“Why did you spank me?”
I sighed. It was time for the speech. “Listen, I’m not an ordinary romantic guy. Spending time with me doesn’t mean roses and strolls through the park before settling down and having three kids together. I need to do things a certain way for them to work for me. I need to dominate, to be in char
ge. It’s just the way I am.”
“So you’re like that all the time?”
“Pretty much. You like to submit. I like to dominate. I thought we could work well together and if that’s the case, then we need what’s in that case, so to speak.”
“I don’t like to submit.”
“Yes, you do.”
“I don’t,” she said, shaking her head too firmly.
“Why not just admit it? You let me kiss you, you let me undress you. You did exactly what I told you to do. You even let me spank you and if she hadn’t come knocking, you’d be laid there with that plug inside you and you’d be in ecstasy right now.”
“I didn’t have much of a choice about that, did I?”
“Are you saying you didn’t like being tied to the bed.”
I could see the yes on the tip of her tongue but it didn’t come. It hovered there, just out of sight, tantalisingly out of reach, like she had become in those brief seconds since we’d begun talking. She was already retreating into herself, I could see it happening. It only made me want her more.
“I don’t know,” she said at last, her voice quiet.
I wasn’t going to spend forever trying to persuade her. She could have some time to work it out for herself. I’d give her the night without me and then she’d see what she was missing, her lust would do the work for me, bring her back, get her ass back under my hands, where it belonged.
“Then I clearly misread things,” I said. “You’re not the right person for me and I’m not the right person for you. So let’s forget this ever happened and head to the dance. I’ll see you down there.”
I turned and walked out of the door before she could say anything else. I’d get one of the staff to collect my case for me later. Then I’d find another hotel to stay in tonight, come back here tomorrow. She’d be begging for my forgiveness by then.
I knew what had happened. She’d had a taste of forbidden pleasure and though it had been glorious, it had frightened her, tasting so much sweeter than she expected. If I’d been able to continue with her tied to the bed, those doubts would have been washed away on a wave of sheer bliss. But because we’d been interrupted, she had a chance to let doubt creep in and take over. There would be no way of getting her back on the bed until she worked out that she wanted this. I knew she wanted this. So did she. But people can be strange sometimes. She needed time. The best way for that to happen was to leave her alone.
I walked along the corridor, wondering for a brief moment if I was making the right decision. What if she didn’t beg me for more? It had never happened with any sub before but there was always a potential first time.
I put the thought aside. If it happened, I’d deal with it then. I doubted it would though. Her moan when I slid the plug towards her ass had told me the truth about her. She wanted me. She wanted this.
When I got down to the ground floor, I made my way through the milling guests towards the Herriot Suite. Inside was the cream of the publishing and writing world, though most people wouldn’t have recognised the stars in there. Editors and authors don’t often make the front pages of the newspapers.
Did anyone passing by know that the man with the moustache in the corner was responsible for the biggest piece of erotica to come out of Britain in the last ten years? What about the woman cradling her baby bump, writing under a male name, producing stomach churning horror beloved by those for whom Stephen King was just too tame a talent.
There were a few faces I didn’t recognise but only a few. The room was large enough to accommodate a couple of hundred people easily. The far wall had four floor to ceiling windows draped with heavy velvet curtains in a deep crimson. It was too dark to tell what was outside but the sight of them gave the room the look of a Georgian ballroom. Perhaps it had been at one time.
To my left was a small stage and a band were playing fifties covers to an appreciative crowd. Those who wanted to dance were spread about in front of the band. To the right were the non-dancers and the unsures. Some were sitting around tables drinking too much wine. I didn’t envy the amount of hangovers there would be tomorrow morning. A makeshift bar had been set up in the corner and that was where I headed, returning greetings as I moved through the room.
What would Lucy make of this? I wondered about her as I joined the queue. Would she come down and apologise? Try and make me apologise?
I realised that was why I had taken to her so much. There were elements of her that were impossible to predict. It had been a long time since I’d met someone like that. Had I ever?
The bluster of her trying to prove herself to be a hard ass had gone in the time we’d spent together. The real her was breaking out of its shell, ready to come into the world as the sub I knew she wanted to be.
What would she be like after I was done with her? Would she ever be the same again? For the second time since I’d met her, my brain flashed a question that I didn’t want to ask. What if I didn’t end things with her when I was done? What if I kept her?
“Bill,” a woman’s voice said behind me, tapping me on the shoulder.
“I turned round and saw the person I least wanted to see. “Sandra?”
“Care to dance?”
She took my hand before I could refuse. I could have snatched it away but making a scene was probably a bad idea. If this Marty Berghaus thing ended up in court, the last thing I wanted was to have to explain why I’d ended up in a brawl with Sandra in front of a roomful of witnesses.
She brought me into the mass of people on the dancefloor just as the music changed from fifties to nearer classical, a violin appearing from nowhere, the music soft and slow, a Russian folk song of some kind.
“What are you doing here?” I asked as we started to turn to the music, her hand on my shoulder, mine around her back, mirroring the other dancers.
“Rumour has it you’re on the look out for a bestseller,” Sandra said, a small smile flicking across her lips. “When you already have one raring to go.”
“You’ve come to spy on me?”
“I was invited here, remember?”
“That was when you were working for me. You lost your job, Sandra, remember that?”
“Maybe I’m here to find a new one.”
“Or maybe you’ve come to taunt me. Why did you do it? Why’d you change the contracts?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Tell me something though, Bill.”
“What?” I asked as she spun away, quick stepping backwards before returning to me arms.
“Why did we never get together? It wasn’t like I tried.”
“I don’t sleep with employees.”
“I’m not an employee anymore though, am I?”
“You’re with Marty though.”
“What if I wasn’t? Would you take me?”
“You don’t want me, Sandra. You want my money.”
“But I could do such wonderful things in return for it. I could do whatever-,” she leaned towards my ear and whispered, “-you wanted me to do.”
I shook my head. “Tell Marty he’s welcome to you.” The song slowed, coming to an end. “Now if you’ll excuse me.”
“Don’t walk away from me,” she hissed as I turned from her. “We’ll take you for everything you’ve got, you know that. But I could get Marty to forget the whole thing if you just take me to dinner. That’s not asking too much, is it? One little dinner?”
“Not going to happen.”
She leaned over and kissed my cheek, whispering in my ear a moment later, “Then you're about to get fucked in a very different way.”
THIRTEEN - LUCY
Why didn’t I say yes? After he left the bedroom, I sank onto the edge of the bed, my head in my hands. He had asked me a simple enough question. Why had I had to complicate so much in my mind?
Did I like it when he tied me down? Yes, a thousand times yes. So why didn’t I say so?
I didn’t know the answer. The only thing that I could think of was that I w
asn’t supposed to like it. I was supposed to be mega-bitch boss. I was supposed to be in charge of everyone and everything and yet I’d crumbled after one kiss from him. He told me to strip. I did it. He told me to dress in my work clothes so he could remove them. I didn’t refuse. I could have done, told him to stop treating me like a toy to be played with. But I had loved every minute of it. Even being tied to the bed, his hand on my ass.
I had protested because I thought that was what I was supposed to do. Why couldn’t I just accept that I liked it? What was wrong with me?
When I said, “I don’t know,” I thought he would sit me down, get the truth out of me. Then we could go back to what we were doing, forget the dance, forget the outside world, have one perfect evening together. But then that might have been worse. I didn’t want a single evening with him. I didn’t want a one night stand. Just being away from him in that moment was painful. I was desperate for him to come back.
He’d walked away. I’d told him the truth. I didn’t know if I wanted to be tied down. My inner submissive had loved handing over control of the situation to him but the mega-bitch boss I was supposed to be knew it was wrong. He was an employee. This was a bad idea all round.
I’d been proven right when he left me alone, walking away as if he couldn’t get out of the room fast enough. I felt awful.
Forget this ever happened, he’d said. Forget this ever happened. Like that was even possible. I would never forget tonight, not if I lived to be a hundred. It had awoken something in me and instead of embracing it, I’d stamped it down, going back into the little girl I had been for so many years.
When I was growing up, I never got ‘the talk.’ Instead, I got the channel changed on the TV when kissing happened, God forbid anything more than that might occur.
When my body started to change, I wanted to talk to my parents about it. I knew I couldn’t. They had made that clear whenever I’d tried to talk about anything involving my body. My sister was no help, away at boarding school and only back long enough to tell me to leave her alone, she was too busy to talk. I picked up snippets of information from the other kids at school but the main thing I learned was that it was something to be ashamed of. Desire was something to be ashamed of.
