—Megan Burke
She’d scrawled a phone number under her name.
Kyra flicked the card back and forth in her hand, then punched the numbers into her cell phone before she could talk herself out of it.
Megan answered the phone almost immediately. “This is Megan.” The voice was professional and cool.
“Hi,” Kyra said, not sure how to begin. “This is Kyra Peterson.”
Megan’s voice changed to warm and friendly. “I’m so glad you called. What can I do for you?”
Kyra closed her eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. Megan sounded eager to help. “My husband’s stranded at work. The car won’t start, and it’s the only vehicle we have. I called Cassandra, but she didn’t answer.”
“Do you need us to get him?” Megan asked without missing a beat.
Kyra smiled, relieved Megan had made this easy. “Yes. I hate to interrupt your evening, but I didn’t know who else to call.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m happy to help. You know, my husband’s a mechanic. Why don’t you stay home with Sophie—I’m betting she’s already asleep—and we’ll pick up David. Trent can look at his car and tow it home if necessary.”
Kyra blinked. She hadn’t known Trent was a mechanic. “Th-that would be great.”
“What’s the address?”
“It’s not far from here.” Kyra rattled off directions.
“We’ll leave right now,” Megan said.
“Thanks. You’re really saving us.”
Kyra called David and let him know the plan, then reorganized the pantry to distract herself while she waited. It was ten o’clock when he finally walked through the front door, shoulders slumped.
“Well?” Kyra asked.
“Trent couldn’t tell in the dark, so we towed it to his shop. He’ll look at it tomorrow.”
Kyra chewed her nail. “What if it’s not an easy fix?”
“We’ll worry about it tomorrow. I’m going to play video games for a half hour before bed. I need to unwind.”
The next morning, David biked the three miles to work. Sophie and Kyra were sitting in a fort made of blankets and chairs, eating pretend tomato soup, when he called.
“Did you hear from Trent?” Kyra asked.
“Yes.” She heard the defeat in David’s voice. “It’s bad.”
“How bad?” Kyra squeaked. Sophie happily slurped imaginary soup out of a toy colander, oblivious to Kyra’s stress.
“The car’s totaled. The water pump busted, and a head gasket broke and that means water has been leaking into the oil.” David sighed. His hair was probably a rumpled mess. “Basically, the engine has to be rebuilt—more money than the car’s worth. Trent said our best bet is to sell it for parts and buy something new. Guess we need to go car shopping.”
The Honda was a piece of work. But they owned it free and clear, and it got them where they needed to go. Or it had.
“We’ll have to get a car loan,” Kyra said, feeling sick. Even before the IUIs ate up their emergency fund, there wouldn’t have been enough money for this.
“I know.” She heard the despair in his voice. “Trent refused to let me pay him for his time. That’s something, at least.”
“That was really generous of him. I hope they know we didn’t expect that.”
“I’m so grateful for his help. Can you take them cookies today? We’ll invite them over for dinner soon.”
While Sophie slept, Kyra made a batch of chocolate chip cookies. When Sophie woke up, Kyra loaded up a plate, and they left for the Burkes.
“Why are we taking cookies?” Sophie asked as she skipped alongside Kyra. She held Sophie’s hand tightly in hers, balancing the plate of cookies in the other.
“Because Mr. and Mrs. Burke looked at our car and told us what’s wrong with it.”
“What’s wrong?”
Kyra wrinkled her nose. She barely understood the problem, and had no idea how to explain it to a three-year-old. “Something broke, and it made something else break. I think.”
“Oh. Does Mrs. Burke have kids I can play with?”
“No. But we’re not going to stay long anyway.”
They trudged up Megan’s front steps. Kyra didn’t know what kind of hours real estate agents kept and had no idea if Megan would be home at three o’clock in the afternoon. But she let Sophie ring the doorbell anyway, and they waited.
It was quiet for a long time. Kyra rang the doorbell again.
“I don’t think she’s home,” Sophie said.
“Maybe you’re right.” Kyra leaned down to leave the plate of cookies on the porch when she heard footsteps. She rose quickly, and the door swung open.
“Well, hello.” A grin split Megan’s face. “This is a pleasant surprise.”
“We brought you cookies.” Sophie did a little hop. “I’m Sophie. You came to my house when my baby went to live in heaven.”
Kyra swallowed. Megan’s eyes flicked to hers. “It’s nice to see you again, Sophie.”
“My mommy said you helped tell us our car breaked.”
Megan laughed, opening the door wider. “That’s right I guess. Can you come in for a minute?”
Kyra opened her mouth to decline, but Sophie scampered inside before Kyra got the chance.
“We won’t stay long,” Kyra said awkwardly, holding out the plate of cookies. “Thank you for helping us out. We really appreciate it.”
“I’m glad we could help.” Megan pulled a cookie out and took a bite. “These are amazing. Trent told me your car is totaled. That sucks.”
“Yeah,” Kyra agreed. Talk about an understatement.
“We’re going to buy a pink car,” Sophie yelled.
Megan laughed. “I would totally drive that.”
Sophie grinned, clearly pleased with herself. “Me too.”
“Probably not a pink one,” Kyra said. “I’m not sure what we’ll buy. We’ll have to do some research first.”
“Trent’s an expert at cars,” Megan said. “You should let us go car shopping with you. He can spot a lemon from a mile away.”
Kyra nearly declined, but then reconsidered. The last thing they needed was to get ripped off, and car shopping would be difficult without a vehicle to get around in. “Are you really offering?”
“Absolutely. It’ll be fun.”
“Well, then thank you. We could use an expert’s opinion.”
Saturday morning the Burkes pulled into Kyra and David’s driveway at ten o’clock on the dot. Sophie ate a bowl of cereal at a turtle’s pace while Kyra wiggled Sophie’s feet into shoes.
“Sophie, they’re here,” Kyra said. “Please hurry.”
“Who’s here?” Sophie asked.
Kyra heard David welcome Megan and Trent at the front door and apologize for not being quite ready.
“Mr. and Mrs. Burke,” Kyra said. “Remember? We talked about this last night.”
Sophie took another huge bite, spilling milk down her chin.
“Soph, be careful.” Kyra grabbed a napkin and wiped up the milk before it could dribble onto Sophie’s shirt, then pulled the Velcro strap tight on one shoe. Kyra grabbed a granola bar and some fruit snacks and tossed those into her purse, which already held a collection of toys and other treats. “You have two minutes to finish eating. Then we’re leaving whether you’re done or not.”
Sophie started shoveling food into her mouth. Kyra grabbed Sophie’s bowl from her as the last bite entered her mouth and dropped it into the sink. Sophie raced to the front room and Kyra heard her ask Megan, “Are we going in your car?”
Kyra pulled Sophie’s jacket off the kitchen counter and headed into the front room to rescue Megan, her giant purse flopping against her side.
“Sorry,” Kyra said, hoping her stress didn’t show. “We’re running behind this morning. Sophie slept in.”
“Not a problem,” Megan said. “We’ve got all day.”
By noon Kyra had a massive headache. At two o’clock they took a break and
stopped for lunch.
“I think you should consider the Toyota in Draper,” Trent said. “It’s got low mileage, and the engine looks great. Or the minivan at the dealership in Sandy is a good option too.”
“There’s almost fifteen thousand more miles on the van. And it’s three years older,” Kyra said.
“The engine’s in excellent condition, and it’s a great price. That van will last you ten years, easy,” Trent said.
“Do you think the price on the car is too steep?” David asked. Kyra heard the worry in his voice.
“I think it’s reasonable,” Trent said. “But it’s always risky to buy from a person instead of a dealer.” He turned to Megan. “I’m going to grab a drink refill. Want to come?”
“Sure,” she said. Kyra smiled her thanks, and Megan nodded in understanding.
“What do you think?” Kyra asked David as soon as the Burkes were out of ear-shot.
“I want to get the minivan. I feel more comfortable buying through a dealership. And when we have another baby, we’re going to outgrow a car pretty fast.”
Kyra shook her head. “We’ve already talked about this. We need something with good gas mileage.”
“I drive three miles to work. I don’t think it’ll make a significant difference.”
“Insurance will be more on a van. We can fit in a car for a while longer. Maybe by the time a third baby’s on its way—”
“Kyra.” David grabbed her hand. “You could be pregnant right now. I really think we should consider the van. It’s not much more than the Toyota, and it’d be the best option in the long run.”
“I like green,” Sophie said, taking a bite out of her cookie as though that settled things.
David smiled. “See? Sophie wants the van too.”
Kyra imagined driving to Arizona for Christmas, their van piled high with presents and luggage, while Sophie watched videos on the van’s built-in DVD player and the new baby slept soundly. Kyra’s heart ached. “Can we afford it?” she asked.
“You tell me.”
She slowly nodded. “It’ll be tight, but we can make the payments, thanks to your promotion. But there won’t be much left to save for fertility treatments.”
“Doesn’t matter; the IUI worked.”
“If it did work, we’re really in trouble. A baby costs money too, you know.”
“We have to get a vehicle either way. Might as well pay an extra fifty bucks a month and get one that fits our family’s needs.”
“Okay. Let’s go test drive the van again.”
David grinned, rumpling Sophie’s hair. “See, Soph? Mom likes the green one too.”
After test driving the van one more time, they decided to buy it. Megan and Trent took Sophie over to the popcorn machine while Kyra and David waited in the office for the salesman to draw up the paperwork.
“Are we making the right decision?” Kyra asked David.
“Trent’s a good negotiator. The monthly payment’s squarely in our price range now. Only twenty more a month than the car would’ve been. We’ll still have a little left over at the end of the month.”
“But not enough for long-term infertility treatments. Barely enough for a baby.”
“We won’t need the money for treatments.”
Kyra thought about Megan and Trent, who had struggled with infertility their entire marriage. How many years had they tried? How many treatments had they undergone? And they still didn’t have a baby.
What if the same thing happened to Kyra and David?
Kyra should just ask her about it. Megan didn’t seem like the type to get easily offended. But Kyra was the type to get easily embarrassed. Even though Megan knew about the miscarriage, she didn’t know about the IUIs.
The finance officer entered the office. “I’ve got the paperwork right here.”
Kyra swallowed back the bile. David took her hand in his.
“Everything’s as we discussed,” he said. Kyra’s stomach knotted with every word. Soon she and David were signing the papers, the proud new owners of a minivan.
“Thank you so much for everything,” Kyra told Megan as she hugged a cranky Sophie.
“It wasn’t a problem,” Trent said.
“We want you to come over for dinner on Monday so we can thank you properly. It’s the least we can do,” Kyra said.
Trent put an arm around Megan and squeezed. “I never turn down a free meal.”
“It’s a plan,” David said.
They switched Sophie’s car seat to the van, thanked the Burkes, and went home. Sophie was a bear through dinner and her bedtime routine, but she fell asleep almost immediately after they laid her down.
“Well,” David said, wrapping an arm around Kyra’s waist and nuzzling her neck. She scooped out generous portions of ice cream for both of them. “What do you think, little lady?”
“I think it’ll be a good vehicle. I hope the payments don’t come back to bite us. What if—”
“Don’t even say it. The IUI worked. Everything’s going to be okay.”
If only Kyra was so confident.
If Clomid was miserable, then Follistim was hell. It made Megan seem like a completely balanced person on Clomid.
“Megan, honey, why don’t you lie down and read for a while or something?” Trent suggested one evening after dinner.
“I can’t leave the dirty dishes in the sink,” Megan yelled.
He grabbed a book off the kitchen counter and handed it to her. “I’ll do the dishes.”
Tears pricked at her eyes. “You are so sweet, Trent.”
“I’ll bring you some ice cream when I’m done, okay?”
Megan nodded, took the book, and walked into the living room like an obedient child. She lay on the couch, and for twenty blissful minutes lost herself in the regency romance. A sharp buzzing jolted her from the story, and she fumbled for her phone.
How are you today? Christina texted.
Follistim sucks, Megan wrote. I am more hormonal than a sixteen-year-old girl who just found out her best friend’s dating her crush. How are you? Nervous about the surgery?
Megan flipped the phone over and reached for her book. She fumbled as she grabbed it, dropping the book to the floor. It slammed shut, effectively losing her place.
“No,” Megan muttered. Tears pooled in her eyes. She sat up, grabbing the book and riffling to find her place. What had she read last? She couldn’t even remember.
“Megan?” Trent stood behind the couch, a bowl of ice cream in each hand.
“I lost my place,” Megan said, flipping the pages. “Christina texted me, and I dropped the book, and now I can’t find where I was.” She closed the book and started to cry. “Now I’ll have to start all over.”
“It’s okay. I’ll help you find your place.” Trent walked around the couch, handing her a bowl of ice cream. Megan took it, wiping at her eyes with one hand. He carefully removed the book from her lap, as though worried she’d freak out again, and set it on the end table.
Megan’s phone buzzed and she read the text. I’m not too nervous.
Megan sighed. Of course Christina wasn’t nervous. She was always cool, calm, and collected.
“What’s wrong?” Trent asked.
Megan took a bite of ice cream, wiping at the tears again. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be crying. This whole thing is stupid.”
Trent put an arm around her and kissed her temple. “We knew what the side effects would be.”
“People always talk about how hormonal pregnancy makes you. Does that mean it’s basically nine months of Follistim?”
“I don’t think pregnancy will be quite this emotional. We see pregnant women all the time, and they seem fine.”
“Maybe I really suck at hiding my emotions, and they’re really good at it. If this is what pregnancy is like, maybe it’s not worth it. What if we’re awful parents?”
“You know that’s fear talking. But I do agree we can’t keep putting ourselves through this. If thi
s IUI doesn’t work, we should consider adoption.”
Megan shook her head. “No. I’m not ready to go there.”
“Some agencies have wait times of less than six months. I think the emotional aspect will be easier to handle without the hormone drugs.”
“I can’t talk about this right now.” Megan’s voice rose at the end, and she shook her head violently back and forth. “Please, I can’t.”
“Shhh. Eat your ice cream while we watch TV.” He handed her the remote. “You pick the show.”
Things calmed down over the next few days, but not by much. When it came time for Sienna’s piano lesson, Megan prayed she could handle the stress. She tapped her foot nervously on the floor as Sienna played her piece, wondering if she’d talk about the baby. Knowing it was impossible to avoid the subject.
Sienna finished the piece, and Megan nodded. “Good. I can tell you practiced this week.”
“I’ve had a lot of time. My days of hanging out seem to be over.” Sienna motioned to her stomach, which was still flatter than Megan’s could ever hope to be. “I spoke with a caseworker at the crisis center. She gave me a list of adoption agencies they recommend, and we talked about resources for single parenting. She was really helpful.”
“That’s great.”
“I met with one of the agencies today. I’ve decided I’m going to give my baby away. Sorry, I mean place my baby for adoption. I’m supposed to use ‘positive adoption language.’” Sienna made air quotes with her fingers.
Megan’s heart tore. Maybe you should adopt Sienna’s baby. The thought lingered at the back of her mind, but she pushed it away. She wasn’t ready for adoption. Not yet.
“My caseworker Rebecca says it’s not giving your baby away. It’s giving your baby the best chance at a successful future.”
Megan could give that baby a successful future. She swallowed hard. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. “That’s true. Those couples have been waiting so long to have children, and I’m sure any one of them would be fantastic parents to your baby.”
“Have you ever thought of adopting?”
Megan’s stomach flipped. She chewed on her lip, not sure how to answer. “Trent’s suggested it. But I’m not ready.”
Chasing Someday Page 15
