Table of Contents
___________________
Copyright & Credits
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty
Chapter Forty-One
About Ronnie K. Stephens
This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places, and incidents are a product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to real events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental..
Published by Akashic Books
©2018 Ronnie K. Stephens
Paperback ISBN: 978-1-61775-702-0
Hardcover ISBN: 978-1-61775-703-7
eISBN: 978-1-61775-704-4
Library of Congress Control Number: 2018936330
First printing
Akashic Books
Twitter: @AkashicBooks
Facebook: AkashicBooks
E-mail: [email protected]
Website: www.akashicbooks.com
Chapter One
Quinn was happy to see that the neighborhood park was empty. She was several years older than most of the kids who frequented the playground after school, but her younger sister, Riley, loved to climb all over the structures and play make-believe. Quinn’s mother was busy making dinner, so taking Riley to the park had become a sort of ritual for the sisters.
“Hurry, Riley! The trolls are coming. Get up here!” Quinn shouted, peering through the miniature teleidoscope she wore around her neck.
“I’m too small,” Riley hollered back.
Quinn reached down and took Riley by the hand, pulling her up the gray plastic boulder. Together they scurried up a set of stairs and into the turret at the far end of the playground. Quinn peered through the yellow side rails, then grinned at Riley and said, “That was close. So what do you think, should we charge them?”
“I just . . . need . . . a . . . minute,” Riley wheezed. She had more energy than the doctors had expected, but even brief exercise drained the strength from her six-year-old body.
“No sweat. Come here, boo.”
Quinn shifted her weight and set Riley in her lap. She was used to these pauses, to Riley’s icy hands and flush-red cheeks. Though only fifteen herself, Quinn had spent almost seven years in hospital waiting rooms while doctors checked Riley’s heart.
“I . . . don’t . . . think . . . I can . . . go after those . . . trolls today.” Riley’s voice sounded far away, barely moving like the way the leaves shift in the wind before a storm.
Quinn studied her sister’s face, which had gone as white as her hands. Riley’s chest shuddered up and down like a weary piston.
“Yeah. You don’t look so good. We better get back home. Mom’ll have dinner ready soon, anyway.”
Quinn spoke with a maturity that startled most adults, but life has a different way of moving when your baby sister is born already fighting death. Lately Quinn had noticed that their time at the park was getting shorter and shorter—ever since Riley’s last birthday. She thought over all their trips to the hospital, searching for a number that seemed just a little out of reach.
* * *
Quinn was just eight years old when Riley was born, too young then to understand the soft way adults said her sister’s name. Three times that first year, Quinn had folded herself into waiting room chairs, their cushioned laps already worn and tearing with the weight of worry. She had watched her mother turn the crochet hooks over and over until every room in the house was a blanket fort.
Doctors had noticed Riley’s condition almost immediately; they heard odd sounds when listening to her heart, and her oxygenation levels were noticeably lower than they should be. That’s when a nurse told Riley’s mom that they would be moving Riley to the neonatal intensive care unit. Quinn was obviously too young to go with Riley, so she stayed with her mother while a doctor moved her new sister. Of course, her mother pushed hard and got herself released later that day.
The two of them followed brass signs from one hall to another until the hospital felt like an endless labyrinth. Quinn had lost all sense of direction, so she trailed after her mother, peering into hospital rooms when they passed an open door. Most of the patients were much older than her parents, connected to more machines than Quinn could count. Some of them had family in the room with them. Others looked off into space, blankets pulled up to their chins, hands shaking. Quinn knew then that the only real meaning of hollow was a woman lying in bed dying, entirely alone. When they finally reached the NICU, Quinn and her mother were held up at the desk by a young woman in pink scrubs.
“I’m sorry, ma’am. We tried to reach you in your room, but you had already been discharged. Riley was taken to see Dr. Howe in pediatric cardiology a few minutes ago.”
“Excuse me? Shouldn’t I be consulted before my daughter is taken to a doctor I’ve never even met?”
“I’m very sorry, ma’am. We tried to contact the father—”
“There is no father.”
“The nurses noticed some anomalies that couldn’t wait,” the nurse continued, ignoring Jane’s interjection.
“What kind of anomalies? Is Riley okay?”
“You should really speak with Dr. Howe. I’ve paged someone to take you to him.”
Quinn held her mother’s hand, which had gone cold as they stood waiting to be escorted to Dr. Howe. She didn’t understand what the nurse meant by anomalies, but she could tell that her mother was scared. Quinn squeezed her hand and leaned into the crook of her mother’s arm. She felt her mother relax her muscles and pull Quinn closer, then kiss the top of her head.
“Hello, ma’am. I’m Beth,” said another nurse approaching them.
“Are you the one who’s going to take me to my daughter?”
“Yes, ma’am,” she answered. “Follow me.”
Quinn and her mother walked a few paces behind the nurse, who led them back the way they had come. She turned abruptly to the right down a drab hallway with beige walls. Aside from black plaques with the names of doctors and their specialties, the walls were bare. Quinn tried to read the names, but the nurse quickened her pace, and Quinn’s mother dragged her along almost at a jog.
“Here we are,” Beth said, opening a door to their left.
Once inside, the nurse approached a glass window and spoke with an assistant on the other side. After a few moments, she returned to Quinn and her mother.
“Someone will take you to your daughter in a few minutes.”
“Thank you,” her mother said, but Beth was already out the door.
When they were finally shown into a room, Quinn was dumbstruck by the surreal scene. Her baby sister, barely two days old, was sleeping in the center of a long hospital bed. She was naked except for a diaper. A man with silver hair and fat fingers was moving something across Riley’s chest; he appeared to be studying an image on a computer monitor. Quinn tried to make sense of the picture, but all she saw was a fuzzy black-and-white blob. The man hit a few keys, and parts of the screen turned red and blue. Quinn saw a large black spot in the middle of the screen, with a long white strip on one side that opened and closed like a mouth.
“I’m Jane, Riley’s mother.”
“Quiet, please,” the man said.
“Excuse me? That’s my daughter. What are you doing to her? Where’s Dr. Howe?”
The man laid the device next to the monitor.
“I’m sorry, ma’am. I don’t mean to be rude. This is an ultrasound, and getting a clear picture of your daughter’s heart is extremely difficult. I should be finished in a few minutes. Dr. Howe will review the ultrasound and then come to speak with you.”
“Her heart? What’s wrong with her heart?”
“Really, ma’am. I’m not able to discuss what I see on the screen. If you’ll allow me to finish up, Dr. Howe will be able to explain everything for you.”
Quinn and her mother sat in silence, watching the man move the device across Riley’s chest again. Each time he used the keyboard, an image froze briefly on the screen. Quinn assumed that he was taking pictures, but the man didn’t speak again. When he was satisfied with what he’d found, the man left the room, informing Quinn’s mother yet again that the elusive Dr. Howe would be with her soon.
When Dr. Howe did enter the room, he carried a folder with Riley’s name and several pictures showing the outline of a heart. He drew on the pictures as he talked with Quinn’s mother.
“Your daughter has a form of stenosis. The purple you see here,” he said, motioning to a purple smudge on the paper, “indicates oxygenated blood moving back into the heart and mixing with unoxygenated blood. Imagine a river flowing into the ocean: on a normal day, the water from the river simply pours into the ocean; after a storm, however, the tides are disrupted and water from the ocean pushes against water from the river. The result is murky water where the two intersect. That’s what we’ll be working to prevent in Riley’s heart. Hopefully a simple valvuloplasty will do the trick.”
Quinn tried to follow the conversation, but the words were long and unfamiliar. The longer Dr. Howe spoke, the more upset her mother seemed to become. She pressed Riley to her chest, tears falling onto the blanket she had wrapped Riley in while they waited. Quinn would never forget that conversation—the day she learned to listen less to the words people said and more to the way they said them.
* * *
“Mom, what does that word mean?” Quinn asked later that night. She didn’t understand why Dr. Howe had taken Riley, or why when they saw Riley again she had tiny tubes coming out of her chest and legs.
“What word, Quinn?”
Quinn fidgeted with one of her kaleidoscopes, studying the way the stained flecks of glass moved around each other without ever really touching. The thin black borders between each color reminded her of family reunions, the way all her cousins used to stand together like a patchwork quilt, coming as close as they could to becoming something whole before the camera flash scattered them back to their respective corners.
“Stenasiasis.”
“You mean stenosis?”
“Yeah. The doctor used that word earlier when he was talking about Riley. What does stenosis mean?”
“Well, your baby sister has a hole in her heart. She has a hard time using the air she breathes.”
“And Dr. Howe—he’s going to fix the hole?”
“Yes, Quinn. For a little while.”
“How?”
“Well, sweetie, he puts a very small balloon into her heart that expands to make space for more of the good blood to get through.”
“So she can breathe?”
“Sort of. Like this.” She took Quinn’s hand, so that Quinn’s fist fit inside hers. “Now, open your hand.”
Quinn spread her fingers, pushing her mother’s hand open.
“You see how my hand opened when you made yours bigger?”
Quinn nodded.
“That’s what Dr. Howe does for Riley. The balloon makes the broken part of her heart bigger so Riley has more air in her body.”
Quinn thought about this for a long time. “Mom?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Is she going to die?”
“What makes you think that?”
“My teacher says that’s what happens to fish when they’re not in water, and to people when a house is on fire. They don’t have air to breathe, so they die.”
“I suppose that’s true. But your sister is going to be okay.”
“How do you know?”
“Because she has you for a big sister, silly. You’ll protect her.”
Chapter Two
Riley took her sister’s hand as they stepped from the curb and crossed the street. Their house was right on the corner across from the park, so their mother could watch them from the kitchen window while they played.
“Quinn?” Riley ventured, scarcely audible.
“Yeah?”
“Is mom sad at me?”
“What do you mean?”
“She always looks at me and cries. Is she sad at me? I don’t want her to be sad at me.”
“No, Riley. Mom isn’t sad at you.”
“Then why does she cry?”
“Well . . .” Quinn didn’t really know how to have this conversation with her sister. Riley knew she was sick, but people had a difficult time telling her exactly how serious her condition was. Her mom tried to explain of course, but she’d start sobbing and would have to go to her room for a while. Riley had come to rely on Quinn for the sort of honesty that adults didn’t offer her.
“She’s not sad at you. She’s sad for you.”
“But why? What did I do?”
“Nothing, kiddo. You didn’t do a thing.”
They stopped and sat in the porch swing that the old man next door had hung for them.
“Your birthday is almost here.”
Riley extended her fingers and raised them above her head, her wide smile nearly overtaking her pale cheeks.
“Seven,” she said. “I’m gonna be seven this time.”
“That’s right. Seven.”
The doctors had told Quinn’s mother that Riley probably wouldn’t see her seventh birthday. Quinn shook the thoughts from her head.
“Hey, smell that? Mom made spaghetti!”
Both jumped down from the swing and raced inside.
“Last one in has to set the table!” Quinn shouted, throwing the screen door open.
Riley ducked under Quinn’s arm and dodged Butterfly, their brindle boxer. “Better get the soap, then!” she said without looking over her shoulder. They both knew Quinn let Riley win every time, but they made a game of the chase anyway.
“Hey, no running in the house!”
“Gotta beat her, Mom!” Riley giggled. Butterfly was on her heels by the time she slid into the kitchen. Officially he was Quinn’s dog, but he took to Riley almost immediately and never left her side. He’d long since worn down the carpet beside her bed, and a patch near the door reminded them all how he kept watch when Riley went in for overnight procedures. He looked enormous next to Riley, but he had the same soft touch with her that Quinn had. Butterfly seemed to know even before she did when Riley was going to have a rough day.
“You beat me again!” Quinn lamented.
Riley smiled at her through jagged breaths. “Helps to be tiny.”
Quinn stuck out her tongue. “At least I can reach the plates!”
“Good. Now if you wouldn’t mind getting a few down,” their mother interjected, “dinner is nearly finished. I made your favorite, Quinn.”
“With the olives?”
“Yep.”
“And the spicy sausage?”
“Of course.”
Quinn beamed. Her mother rarely took the time to make spaghetti anymore. She didn’t like the store-bought sauces, so she made her own. The whole process took hours, but the effort paid off. Quinn could eat her mother’s sauce with a spoon, which she had done on more than one occasion.
“Yum!”
Quinn dipped a finger into the pot of sauce, then licked her fingertip clean. She went for another taste, but her mother swatted at her with a wooden spoon.
“Get out of that,” her mother chided.
* * *
The next morning, Jane eased open the bedroom door and peeked in on Quinn and Riley. She leaned against the jamb for a several minutes. Riley was curled up at Quinn’s feet, and Butterfly was snoring near the foot of the bed. Everyone was in their place, guarding Riley as she slept.
She decided to make pumpkin pancakes with chocolate chips, Quinn’s favorite. Quinn spent more time with Riley than anyone, after all. She had a knack for talking about the things Jane couldn’t put into words. Some days Jane thought Quinn was the only thing holding them all together.
Riley was having trouble catching her breath during breakfast, which was unusual even for her. Quinn and Riley still had a few days off from school for spring break, so Jane decided to take advantage of the free time and bring Riley in for a quick checkup—at least that had been the plan.
“Ms. Willow?” A nurse in carnation-pink scrubs had entered the hospital room where Riley, Quinn, and Jane had spent most of the morning.
Quinn stood next to Riley, holding her hand.
On the other side of the hospital bed, Jane traced butterflies on Riley’s arm almost without thinking. Riley loved butterflies. There was a butterfly garden a few blocks from their house, and Riley asked to visit almost every weekend. She would spend all afternoon walking the paths if Jane let her. Once, Riley had found a red-spotted purple in the far corner of the garden and watched the butterfly flit around for over an hour. When Jane came to collect her, Riley was completely still. “Look at the blues, mama. The colors are like the daytime and the nighttime are holding hands.” Riley was right. The deep blue at the top of the wings faded into a cyan so brilliant the insect almost seemed to glow. Riley spent that evening drawing red-spotted purples over and over until the corkboard in the girls’ room was covered with them.
The Kaleidoscope Sisters Page 1
