The Skeptics Annotated Bible

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by Wells, Steve




  Also by Steve Wells:

  Drunk with Blood: God’s Killings in the Bible

  On the web at:

  SkepticsAnnotatedBible.com

  DwindlingInUnbelief.blogspot.com

  @SteveWellsSAB

  Published by SAB Books, LLC

  Copyright © 2012 by Steve Wells

  All rights reserved

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Wells, Steve

  The Skeptic’s Annotated Bible

  ISBN: 978-0-9882451-0-5

  LCCN: 2012917269

  1. Religion—Controversial literature

  2. Bible—Criticism, interpretation, etc.

  3. Atheism

  4. Christianity and atheism

  I. Title

  First Edition: November 2012

  10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

  For Michael

  Alphabetical Index of the Books

  of the Old and New Testaments

  Acts

  Amos

  1 Chronicles

  2 Chronicles

  Colossians

  1 Corinthians

  2 Corinthians

  Daniel

  Deuteronomy

  Ecclesiastes

  Ephesians

  Esther

  Exodus

  Ezekiel

  Ezra

  Galatians

  Genesis

  Habakkuk

  Haggai

  Hebrews

  Hosea

  Isaiah

  James

  Jeremiah

  Job

  Joel

  John

  1 John

  2 John

  3 John

  Jonah

  Joshua

  Jude

  Judges

  1 Kings

  2 Kings

  Lamentations

  Leviticus

  Luke

  Malachi

  Mark

  Matthew

  Micah

  Nahum

  Nehemiah

  Numbers

  Obadiah

  1 Peter

  2 Peter

  Philemon

  Philippians

  Proverbs

  Psalms

  Revelation

  Romans

  Ruth

  1 Samuel

  2 Samuel

  Song of Solomon

  1 Thessalonians

  2 Thessalonians

  1 Timothy

  2 Timothy

  Titus

  Zechariah

  Zephaniah

  Contents

  Introduction

  About the Categories

  The Old Testament

  Genesis

  Exodus

  Leviticus

  Numbers

  Deuteronomy

  Joshua2

  Judges

  Ruth

  1 Samuel

  2 Samuel

  1 Kings

  2 Kings

  1 Chronicles

  2 Chronicles

  Ezra

  Nehemiah

  Esther

  Job

  Psalms

  Proverbs

  Ecclesiastes

  Song of Solomon

  Isaiah

  Jeremiah

  Lamentations

  Ezekiel

  Daniel

  Hosea

  Joel

  Amos

  Obadiah

  Jonah

  Micah

  Nahum

  Habakkuk

  Zephaniah

  Haggai

  Zechariah

  Malachi

  The New Testament

  Matthew

  Mark

  Luke

  John

  Acts

  Romans

  1 Corinthians

  2 Corinthians

  Galatians

  Ephesians

  Philippians

  Colossians

  1 Thessalonians

  2 Thessalonians

  1 Timothy

  2 Timothy

  Titus

  Philemon

  Hebrews

  James

  1 Peter

  2 Peter

  1 John

  2 John

  3 John

  Jude

  Revelation

  Contradictions

  List of God’s Killings

  Book Abbreviations

  Acts

  – Acts

  Jude

  – Jude

  Am

  – Amos

  1 Kg

  – 1 Kings

  1 Chr

  – 1 Chronicles

  2 Kg

  – 2 Kings

  2 Chr

  – 2 Chronicles

  Lam

  – Lamentations

  Col

  – Colossians

  Lev

  – Leviticus

  1 Cor

  – 1 Corinthians

  Lk

  – Luke

  2 Cor

  – 2 Corinthians

  Mal

  – Malachi

  Dan

  – Daniel

  Mic

  – Micah

  Dt

  – Deuteronomy

  Mk

  – Mark

  Ec

  – Ecclesiastes

  Mt

  – Matthew

  Eph

  – Ephesians

  Nah

  – Nahum

  Est

  – Esther

  Neh

  – Nehemiah

  Ex

  – Exodus

  Num

  – Numbers

  Ezek

  – Ezekiel

  Ob

  – Obadiah

  Ezra

  – Ezra

  1 Pet

  – 1 Peter

  Gal

  – Galatians

  2 Pet

  – 2 Peter

  Gen

  – Genesis

  Phil

  – Philippians

  Hab

  – Habakkuk

  Philem

  – Philemon

  Hag

  – Haggai

  Pr

  – Proverbs

  Heb

  – Hebrews

  Ps

  – Psalms

  Hos

  – Hosea

  Rev

  – Revelation

  Is

  – Isaiah

  Rom

  – Romans

  Jas

  – James

  Ru

  – Ruth

  Jer

  – Jeremiah

  1 Sam

  – 1 Samuel

  Jg

  – Judges

  2 Sam

  – 2 Samuel

  Jl

  – Joel

  SofS

  – Song of Solomon

  Jn

  – John

  1 Th

  – 1 Thessalonians

  1 Jn

  – 1 John

  2 Th

  – 2 Thessalonians

  2 Jn

  – 2 John

  1 Tim

  – 1 Timothy

  3 Jn

  – 3 John

  2 Tim

  – 2 Timothy

  Job

  – Job

  Tit
/>   – Titus

  Jon

  – Jonah

  Zech

  – Zechariah

  Jos

  – Joshua

  Zeph

  – Zephaniah

  Introduction

  For nearly two billion people, the Bible is a holy book containing the revealed word of God. It is the source of their religious beliefs. Yet few of those who believe in the Bible have actually read it (all of it, that is, not just carefully selected bits and pieces).

  This must seem strange to those who have never read the Bible. But anyone who has struggled through its repetitious and tiresome trivia, seemingly endless genealogies, and pointless stories and laws, knows that the Bible is not an easy book to read. So it is not surprising that those who begin reading at Genesis seldom make it through Leviticus. Believers that try to do so continually face a disturbing dilemma: their faith tells them they should read the Bible, but by reading the Bible they endanger their faith.

  When I was a Christian, I never read the Bible. Not all the way through, anyway. The problem was that I believed the Bible to be the inspired and inerrant word of God, yet the more I read it, the less credible that belief became. I finally decided that to protect my faith in the Bible, I’d better quit trying to read it.

  I think most Bible-believers find themselves in that position—although few will admit it. Not even to themselves.

  The most popular solution to this problem is to leave the Bible reading to the clergy. The clergy then quote from the Bible in their writings and sermons, and explain its meaning to the others. Extreme care is taken, of course, to quote from the parts of the Bible that display the best side of God and to ignore those that don’t. That this approach means that only a fraction of the Bible is ever referenced is not a great problem; because although the Bible is not a very good book, it is a very long one.

  But if so little of the Bible is actually used, why isn’t the rest deleted? Why aren’t the repetitious passages—which are often contradictory as well—combined into single, consistent ones? Why aren’t the hundreds of cruelties and absurdities eliminated? Why aren’t the bad parts of the “Good Book” removed?

  Such an approach would result in a much better, but much smaller book. To make it a truly good book, though, would require massive surgery, and little would remain. For nearly all passages in the Bible are objectionable in one way or another. But with a little luck and much careful editing, perhaps a small pamphlet could be produced from the Bible—one that could honestly be called good.

  Perhaps. But to the Bible-believer the entire Bible is inspired and has God as its author. Each passage contains a message from God that must not be altered or deleted. So the believer is simply stuck with the Bible, with no choice but to call it good, true, beautiful, and perfect. When the Bible seems otherwise, as it nearly always does, the problem lies with the believer’s interpretation of the Bible—not with the Bible itself.

  The believer’s defense of the Bible is assisted by those who publish it. They are invariably believers as well, and are interested in promoting and defending the Bible. Millions of such Bibles are published and distributed each year by believers in their tireless and tiresome effort to propagate their beliefs. Consequently, nearly everyone, believer or skeptic, has at least one copy. Among these Bibles will be found many different versions, but all have one thing in common: all are believer-friendly editions that support, promote, and defend the Bible.

  The Skeptic’s Annotated Bible (SAB) attempts to remedy this imbalance. It includes the entire text of the King James Version, but without the pro-Bible propaganda. Instead, passages are highlighted that are an embarrassment to the Bible-believer, and the parts of the Bible that are seldom read in any church, Bible study group, or Sunday School class are emphasized. For these are the passages that test the claims of the Bible-believer. The contradictions and false prophecies show that the Bible is not inerrant; the cruelties, injustices, and insults to women, that it is neither good nor just.

  The SAB will help those who believe in the Bible to honestly reconsider that belief. It will help those who are unfamiliar with the Bible to resist the temptation to believe. And it will help those who have already rejected the Bible defend their position.

  It is time for us all to stop believing in, or pretending to believe in, a book that is so unworthy of belief.

  About the Categories

  There are fourteen categories in the SAB, with the corresponding icons and number of marked passage shown below. No attempt has been made to rate the occurrences, since what seems trivial to one person may seem important to another.

  Still there are some things we can all agree on. No one doubts, for example, that 1 Samuel 15.3, Ezekiel 23.20, and Leviticus 19.18 are cruel, filthy, and good, respectively.

  But many other passages are not nearly so clear. Some will think a verse is important and should be included; others that it is trivial and should be left out.

  Although I would like make the SAB as comprehensive as possible, I can’t include everything. So I apply this test when deciding what to include or leave out: How would an objective reader view the passage? Would she view it as cruel, absurd, intolerant, etc.—or good? If so, I mark it accordingly. If not, I leave it out. (And when in doubt, I leave it out.)

  There is a lot of overlap between the categories, so often a passage that is marked cruel will be marked unjust and intolerant as well. Take 1 Samuel 18:25-27, for example, where David buys his first wife with 200 Philistine foreskins. That passage is marked with absurdity, cruelty, sex, misogyny, family values, injustice, and contradiction icons. And I probably could have thrown in language and science and history, as well.

  I’ve marked passages as I see them. On some you may agree, on others you may disagree. This is as it should be. Read each passage and decide what you think about it. That is the whole point of the SAB.

  Absurdity (2178)

  I’ve labeled things absurd either because they seem absurd (ridiculous or unreasonable) or because they are just plain funny.

  For example, the story about Samson and the 300 foxes in Judges 15.4 is absurd (and funny), while the whole town asking Jesus to leave in Matthew 8.34 after he killed 2000 pigs is just plain funny.

  Sometimes, I admit, I get a bit carried away with this. When Paul, for example, talked about “refreshing his bowels in the Lord” in his letter to Philemon, he probably didn’t mean it the way it sounds in the King James Version. But I mark it anyway, because I like the way it sounds.

  Injustice (1541)

  Bible-believers like to claim that we all get our morality and sense of justice from the Bible. But we don’t. None of us do.

  No one believes that it is just to punish children for what their parents did, that parents should be willing to kill their children for God, or that children should be executed for disobeying their parents, to name just a few examples. And yet these are considered moral imperatives in the Bible.

  In the SAB, I highlight the verses that make us all cringe today, and make us all glad that we don’t actually get our morals and sense of justice from the Bible.

  Cruelty and Violence (1316)

  If I had to pick a single reason for rejecting the Bible, it would be its cruelty.

  It’s not the cruelty per se that bothers me; it’s the biblical god’s role in the cruel acts. The God of the Bible ordered Saul to kill “man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass” in 1 Samuel 15.3. And the Bible contains hundreds of other cruel acts of God, any one of which, if true, would be enough for me to reject the Bible and its vicious God.

  I also object to the pointless violence in the Bible, even when God doesn’t seem to be directly involved. Judges 19, for example, is one of the most disgusting stories in all literature. If God was trying to communicate something in this chapter, I’d rather not know what it was.

  Intolerance (701)

  If there’s a point to the Bible and to religion in general it i
s this: God likes some people and religious beliefs more than others.

  In the Hebrew Scriptures, the Jews are his favorite people, and he despises everyone else. Even so, he only likes certain Jews. Witches, homosexuals, disobedient children, and Sabbath breakers are to be executed.

  And it’s even worse in the New Testament. People with the “wrong” religious beliefs are not just killed; they are tortured forever after they die for their supposedly mistaken beliefs.

  Good Stuff (507)

  But isn’t there some good stuff in the Bible?

  Well yes there is, although surprisingly little for such a big book. Indeed, if the bad, boring, and useless passages were removed from the Bible and only the good retained, the bible would be nothing more than a small pamphlet.

  But Bible-believers are unwilling to edit the Bible. So the good verses, when not invalidated by their immediate context, are contradicted elsewhere in the Bible. There is not a single good idea in the entire Bible that is taught consistently throughout. Consequently, it is worse than useless as a moral, philosophical, political, or scientific guide.

  Still, I think it is important to point out the good stuff in the Bible, and so I have highlighted the good verses and provided a “thumbs up” icon to mark them in the text.

  Contradictions (462)

  Contradictions seem to be the only things that believers are concerned about. God can tell Jehu to collect 70 heads in two baskets, and believers are okay with that, since the Bible is consistent on that topic. But did God kill 23,000 or 24,000 for committing whoredom with the daughters of Moab? Now that’s a real problem to a believer. Not that God would kill so many people for so silly a reason. Who cares about that? No, it’s the number that’s important, because the Bible must not disagree with itself.

  I’ve never seen a contradiction that believers can’t resolve, at least to their own satisfaction. It could have been this way, it could have been that. That’s what it says, but that’s not what it means. It was a copyist’s error. Whatever.

  Contradictions are, in my opinion, the least of the Bible’s problems. I include them for just one purpose: it shows that the Bible, whatever else it may be, is not inerrant.

  How do I define inerrant? Well, I’d say something is inerrant if it has no errors.

 

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