by Glenn, Roy
Since then, I haven’t been the same. I used to have nightmares about the night I found her dead. I had convinced myself that the only way I could close that door and move on with my life was to kill everybody who was involved in her murder.
They’re all dead now.
I killed them all.
But I don’t fell any better. The void from losing Cassandra the way I did hasn’t closed. And as hard as I’ve tried to fill it, the fact is, it’s grown.
My mother, M, told me she’s sure that Cassandra wouldn’t want this life for me. And Bobby tells me all the time that I gotta let it go. He said the best way to get over a woman is to replace her with another woman.
Well, I’ve tried that. But for the most part, it’s just been sex. Good sex, and in some cases, great sex, but sex all the same. I don’t let women get close to me. I began to wonder if I’d ever be capable of loving any woman the way I loved Cassandra; or if I’d even want to. Who needs love when you got lots of money, right?
When I got to Cynt’s, the first person I saw was Bobby. I had known Bobby since the third grade, and we’d been best friends ever since. Bobby was more than my friend. He was my brother. He stood by the bar, talking to one of the dancers. I took a seat and Kevon went to the bar to get me a drink. It wasn’t too long before Bobby came to the table with two glasses.
"What you doin’ here?" Bobby said and sat down.
"Waitin’ for Nick."
"Who kicked your ass?"
"Had a fight with Crazy Joe last night."
"He dead?"
"No."
"How’d you leave it?"
"Joe said buy him a drink and we’ll call it square."
"Did you at least beat him down?"
"Let’s just say that I beat him until he didn’t want any more."
"Big as I heard that mutha fucka got in jail, you shoulda just shot his ass and been done with it."
"Then he’d be dead, and I wasn’t about to kill Joe over no dumb shit like that," I said as Nick sat down at the table.
"Dumb shit like what?" Nick asked.
"Killin’ Crazy Joe," I said.
"I heard you and him hooked up last night," Nick said and took a closer look at my face. "You don’t look that bad."
"Bad enough that Wanda said I couldn’t go to meetings with her lookin’ like this."
Bobby took out his gun and pushed it in front of Nick. "Go ahead and hit me," Bobby laughed. It was good to see Bobby and Nick laughing together. "If that’s all it takes to get outta them meetings, go on and bust me up," Bobby said. We all laughed.
Bobby used to enjoy going to meetings with Wanda; especially when those meetings involved Meka Brazil. She was an investment banker who’d been advising us on our corporation interests.
Did I mention that Meka was beautiful?
But since our meetings involved her less and less, Bobby seemed to have lost interest. Me, I always thought those meetings were boring as hell.
"So while I’m recuperating, I’m goin’ to Nassau. I’m goin’ to meet Jamaica there."
"To talk about expanding there?" Nick asked.
"What do you think about it?"
"I told him that we would back any play he made down there and that he should start to move on it."
"You know Jay wanna hear it from you," Bobby said.
As much as I hated to admit it, I knew Bobby was right. As far as Jamaica and a few other people were concerned, I was still running things. But that’s not what I wanted. Not what I needed to be happening then. I needed to keep moving in the direction I was going.
Legit.
Most times, this life only ends one of two ways: in jail or dead. Sometimes it takes people you love from you. It’s something I’ve always accepted. But losing Cassandra made me understand that this life had asked a price that I wasn’t willing to pay. I had to change the way I was livin’ for Michelle. I felt that’s what Cassandra would want me to do—to be a father to our daughter—keep her safe. For that to happen, I had to put my old life behind me. I needed Nick to step-up and make people understand that he was the boss of the family now.
"I’m goin’ down there to look for some property to buy. But I’ll let him know what you said."
"How long you gonna be down there?" Bobby asked.
"I’ll be down there for a couple of days," I said.
"Give me a call when you get back," Nick said and got up. "I got shit I need to do," he said and left Cynt’s.
Bobby sipped his drink. "So you’re goin’ to Nassau?"
"You should come with me," I said.
"You goin’ alone?"
"No."
"Which one you takin’?"
"CeCe."
"Should I read anything into that?"
"Into what, Bobby?"
"That you’re takin’ CeCe and not amazon Shy," Bobby said, referring to Maria looking so much like Shy.
Maria had been dancing at Cynt’s for years, where she went by the name Mystique, and I always marveled at how much she looked like Cassandra. I remember the first time I saw her. It wasn’t too long after I met Cassandra. I was at Cynt’s with Bobby. We were at the bar talking to Sammy when something drew me like a magnet to the stage. I remember losing myself in the seductive manner that she moved her hips. Maria was bigger than Cassandra, taller: five-eleven maybe; heavier, but not an ounce of fat on her. Her complexion, lips, and her facial structure all favored Cassandra. They had the same beautiful eyes. I used to wonder if Maria and Cassandra could be sisters.
"No, Bobby, you shouldn’t read anything into it," I said and laughed.
"Since you taking CeCe with you, I’ll pass. But you and me need to take a trip, just the two of us. Go to Rio or the Dominican Republic or some shit like that."
"You know, that ain’t a bad idea," I said and thought about it. "You remember the last time we went somewhere that didn’t involve somebody dyin’?"
"We went to Jamaica for some jazz festival," Bobby said and started laughing. "We had a good fuckin’ time," he said and sipped his drink. "We’d have a ball in Nassau. Better time than you’d have with CeCe."
"You want me to tell her she can’t go?"
"No. Since you already told her, I don’t wanna see you get busted up no more than you already are."
"Fuck you, Bobby."
"No," Bobby said and grabbed the hand of one of the dancers as she walked by. He pulled her on his lap, and she put her arms around his neck. "I think it would be better if she did that."
Chapter Five
When me, CeCe and Kevon got off the plane in Nassau, Jamaica and his men were waiting. While Kevon laughed and joked with his old friends and they took care of the luggage, I introduced CeCe to Jamaica.
"Jay, this is CeCe."
"Hello, Jamaica. I’ve heard so much about you that I feel like I already know you," CeCe said and gave him a polite hug.
"You have?" Jamaica looked at me.
"She talks to Bobby a lot," I told him.
"I understand. Well it is my pleasure to meet one as beautiful as you," Jamaica said and started walking. "Come, Wanda has made arrangements for you at Atlantis. And me hired a car and driver for you while you are on the island."
During the ride from the airport, through downtown to the hotel, Jamaica talked briefly about what he saw as the potential for their expansion into Nassau. When he began to get into too much detail, I shut it down. "Why don’t we talk about that tomorrow, Jay," I looked at CeCe.
I liked the fact that she had no part of my business anymore and I was determined to keep it that way. I no longer looked at her as somebody who could get things done for me. I only wanted to enjoy her, her company and her beauty.
"Yes, of course. All this talk of business is probably boring this beautiful lady."
"Not at all. I don’t know if Black told you anything about me, and knowing him he hasn’t even mentioned me to you," CeCe said and rolled her eyes at me. "But I run a business of my own, so all this is fascinati
ng to me."
"What type of business do you run?" Jamaica asked.
"I own a high-end boutique called The In-Town Experience on Thirty-fifth Street and Eighth Avenue."
"May I ask who does your buying?"
"I do."
"I know some very talented seamstresses who design and make outfits. They are getting to be very popular with the tourists. Maybe you come to Freeport when our business here is completed and take a look at what they have produced."
I looked at Jamaica. For a number of reasons, I had no intention of taking CeCe to Freeport.
"I’d be honored," CeCe said and looked at me.
I chose not to comment. I didn’t want CeCe in Freeport because despite the fact that I was really starting to like her, I wasn’t ready for her to meet my mother, M. And more importantly, I made a promise to myself that I would not involve any woman in Michelle’s life unless I was sure that she was going to be around for a while. And then there was Jacara Delbridge, who sang at various spots around the island. I had developed a relationship with Jacara, and we got together when I was on the island. Jacara had cultivated a good relationship with M, which gives her the opportunity to interact with Michelle on a regular basis. That was something that I didn’t like, but had very little control over.
When we arrived at Atlantis on Paradise Island, we checked into a Grand Suite at the Royal Towers. The Grand Suites offered a beautiful water view from full balconies, while inside, generously-sized rooms, fresh flowers, robes and slippers and a whirlpool bath.
Later that evening, we had dinner at the Bahamian Club. The dinner menu featured the finest cuts of succulent steaks, chicken, and fresh grilled seafood. After dinner, we went to the casino and did a little gambling. CeCe was a big winner at the Blackjack table while me and Jamaica did more talking about his plans. "Later on, we go see what me have here. Tomorrow, you and I get out early, and I show you what I look at expanding."
"You know you didn’t need my approval for what you’re doin’ here, right? I mean, I trust you, I trust your judgment. I know you will do what’s right with your business," I said.
"Our business. I never forget that I would not be what I have made myself to be if it wasn’t for you and what you did while I was gone."
"Like I told you then, we couldn’t come up the way we did and you not be a part of it." After I killed André, I cleaned out André’s safe. The plan was to split the three million dollars I took with Bobby and Jamaica. I kept Jamaica’s share and Wanda setup a company for him and put the money in the bank. "I just did what was right."
After killing André Jamaica disappeared. When he didn’t show up afterwards at The Late Night, nobody really gave it much thought. They all just figured he was off somewhere getting high. Jamaica was off-the-chain with the heroin since Vickie died. He and Vickie were real close. After that, nobody saw Jamaica for ten years, until I found him in DC.
After the successful completion of a rehab program, Jamaica came to Freeport to visit me and Cassandra and became the houseguest that just wouldn’t leave. But nobody was rushing him to go. As far as we were concerned, he could stay as long as he needed or wanted to.
As he began to feel better, and his mind got clearer, Jamaica began moving around, seeing how things worked on the island. Shootin’ craps was big on the island, but the locals couldn’t gamble in the casinos. It didn’t take him long to takeover those independent games and setup new ones. Once that was organized and running smoothly, Jamaica turned his attention to extortion. He began shaking down anybody who made money on the tourist industry. From tour operators, to bus and cab companies. From the guys who took tourists out on their boats on fishing trips to the port merchants. If you made money, we made money. Now Jamaica was anxious to expand his operation to Nassau.
When we left the casino at Atlantis, Jamaica took me and CeCe to the gambling spots that he had already taken over then to a few that he was looking to make a move on.
"What you think?" Jamaica asked.
"Everything looks all right. Do you think you’ll have much trouble with the locals when you make your move?"
"If I do, me have an army of brethren to handle that," Jamaica replied smiling.
"I know you do. If things get wild call Nick, and he’ll send some people down to help you," I told Jamaica.
"Thanks, but we can handle it. They not ready for a nigga like me," Jamaica laughed.
I laughed too. "I know they aren’t."
When we got back to the hotel, Jamaica said goodnight and me and CeCe went for a walk on the beach. We walked quietly along the beach with Kevon not far behind us. As we walked, I couldn’t help but think about Cassandra and the first time I took her to Freeport. I looked over at CeCe, who just happened to be looking at me.
"What are you thinking about?" she asked.
"Nothing in particular."
"Then why do you have that big grin on your face?"
"I don’t know. I didn’t know I was grinning."
"Well, you are. You’re thinking about her, aren’t you?"
"Who?"
"Your wife—Cassandra. You and her come here before?"
"Once."
"You take her for a walk on this beach or something?"
"No. But we lived in Freeport for a few years before she died."
"You two probably took a lot of walks on the beach in Freeport, didn’t you?"
"We did."
"You know, when you asked me to come to the Bahamas with you, I thought we were going to Freeport."
"Does that bother you?"
"A little."
"Why?"
"It’s like you don’t want me on that island."
"What makes you say that?"
"I saw the way you looked at Jamaica when he invited me there."
"You saw that, huh?"
"I see everything about you. In case you didn’t know, I’m in love with you. So I thought when you asked me to go with you that I was beginning to mean enough to you to invite me into that part of your world."
"I’ll be honest with you. You do mean a lot to me. That’s why you’re here. I love the beach. I love being in the islands. If things hadn’t happened the way they did, I would have never left here. I wanted to share this part of my world with you because you do mean a lot to me. But yes, there are still some things that I’m just not ready for. Not yet."
"I guess you’re saying I should be happy with the fact that I’m here and not Maria."
"I wouldn’t have put it quite so bluntly, but yes, you should."
We walked in silence for a while, and she slipped her hand in mine. "I’m a big girl, and I went into this with my eyes wide open. I knew all about her. I knew with her looking like your wife what she represents to you, but I went for it anyway. I just wanna know if this is going somewhere?"
I stopped walking and took her in my arms. "I guess you’ll just have to stick around and see. But I will tell you this, I never thought about taking anybody but you," I said and kissed her.
"And believe me. I am so happy to be here with you right now. I can’t imagine any place I’d rather be and any body I’d rather be with."
"Then relax and enjoy yourself. We’re gonna have a good time."
"So what are we going to do tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow morning, I’m going to take care of this business with Jamaica, and then the rest of the time is yours. In fact, I think that you’ll enjoy what I have planned for the rest of the day."
"What’s that?"
"I guess you’ll just have to stick around and see."
That next morning I got up early and left with Jamaica. While I was gone, CeCe occupied herself, shopping at the bazaar near Atlantis. She hadn’t been back in our suite for very long when I returned to the room. "How’d it go?"
"Fine. I think it’s gonna be a good move for him."
"Good. So what’s this big thing you got planned?"
I looked at my watch. "Lunch, so I hope you’re hungry."
When we left the hotel walking, naturally Kevon wasn’t far behind us. We walked to the docks and took the ferry across to the mainland. After CeCe wandered through the bazaar for a while, we made our way down to the market to dine on some of the best seafood the island had to offer. Once we had stuffed ourselves, we got in our car and the driver headed out on West Bay Street away from downtown.
"You really aren’t going to tell me where we’re going, are you?" CeCe asked as the seemingly endless drive continued.
"What fun would that be," I replied and looked out the window.
CeCe leaned forward and tapped Kevon on the shoulder. "Where is he taking me, Kevon?"
"If I knew, I would tell you, but the boss kept this one close to his chest," Kevon lied. He knew exactly where they were going and why they were going there. "I am simply enjoying being back here in me native country and not having to drive," he said and leaned back in his seat.
It wasn’t too much longer after that when we stopped at a house with an electronic gate. "Who lives here?" CeCe asked.
"When they ask, tell them that you are here to see Mr. Lightbourn," I told the driver, ignoring CeCe’s question. The driver did so when the intercom came on. The gate opened and the driver entered the property and approached the beautiful house. As we got closer they saw a man standing out in front.
"Mr. Black," the man said as I got outta the car.
"Mr. Lightbourn," I answered and shook his hand.
"I’m glad you could make it. Everything is all arranged as you requested." I turned to Kevon and he told the driver to leave.
"Mr. Lightbourn, I’d like you to meet Ms. Cameisha Collins and my associate, Kevon Bailey."
"It is a pleasure to meet you both. Come, let us get out of this heat," Mr. Lightbourn said. Me and CeCe followed him into the house. Naturally, Kevon remained outside and tried to find a shady spot.
"Welcome to the Yellow Rose," Mr. Lightbourn began. "Modern grandeur amid the tropical splendors of Lyford Cay."
"This is beautiful," CeCe said as she walked around the elaborately furnished house with her eyes wide open.
