by Don Lincoln
One of the most iconic of the nonserious Aliens is Marvin the Martian. Marvin debuted in the 1948 cartoon Haredevil Hare opposite Bugs Bunny. He is dressed as a Roman centurion, in homage to the identification of the planet Mars with the Roman god of war. Marvin is an astronomer frequently bent on destroying the Earth “because it obstructs [his] view of Venus.” The way he will destroy the Earth is with “an Illudium Pu-36 Space Modulator” (sometimes “Illudium Q-36 Space Modulator”). As with any character that has a conflict with Bugs Bunny, Marvin has very little luck with his plans. A common phrase when he fails to blow up the Earth is, “Where’s the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom!” Marvin the Martian cartoons are often quite funny, but he is never intended to be taken as representing a real Alien.
Another Alien who is somehow not an Alien at all is Superman. Superman, born Kal-El of the planet Krypton, was sent to Earth before his planet exploded. By virtue of having been born on the high-gravity planet Krypton, Superman is very strong. “Faster than a speeding bullet, stronger than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound” was a literal description of his abilities, but these morphed over the years until Superman was indestructible. Superman is not an iconic Alien but rather a superhero.
The 1997 movie Men in Black taps into a little of the lore that surrounds “real” Aliens. A super-secret government organization of men in black suits regulates the comings and goings of Aliens living here on Earth. People who encounter the many Aliens among us are subjected to a “neuralizer,” a little gizmo that flashes a light and causes people to forget. In this movie there are dozens of different kinds of Aliens, from a bunch of partying cockroaches to a huge worm the size of a New York subway train. The movie, along with its sequels, is great fun. Aliens in movies are now commonplace. Rather than being alien, they are just part of the plot, like the inexperienced and grizzled partners in some cop/buddy movies, or the hopelessly mismatched couple in many romantic comedies. Aliens have evolved to the point where they are no longer a novelty.
Aliens Not Mentioned
In a genre as rich as science fiction, it is inevitable that some readers will object to Alien depictions not mentioned here. The 2009 movie Avatar was a blockbuster success and a gorgeous movie, but it is too soon to see if the Na’vi will become an iconic fictional species. Doctor Who is a long-running series describing the antics of a “Time Lord,” a member of an alien species with the ability to travel through time. While wildly popular among a growing cult following, Doctor Who hasn’t made it into broad awareness of the general public outside the United Kingdom. The inability of a particular science fiction story to transition into common knowledge is the most frequent reason for why that particular story was not described here in detail. Transformers, Predator, Independence Day, Third Rock from the Sun, The Coneheads, V, Battlestar Galactica, Starship Troopers, Blade Runner, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, The Fifth Element, Dune, Firefly, Lost in Space; the list can go on for a long time. Similarly, there are brilliant authors of pulp (and contemporary) fiction that haven’t been mentioned: Fredrick Pohl’s Heechee, Larry Niven’s Tales of the Known Universe, Robert Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land, along with his delightful body of work, Ray Bradbury’s The Martian Chronicles, Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle’s The Mote in God’s Eye, this list is also long.
I have also not mentioned Aliens from video games. From the original Space Invaders to the bad guys in Starcraft, Quake, Halo, and so on, the problem with video games is that the Aliens tend to be known by a small and enthusiastic band of gamers. It may yet happen that a video game Alien species will become generally known to the general public, but this has not yet happened.
So let me apologize to all readers for their favorite Alien I haven’t mentioned. I love them all too.
Alien Archetypes
Now that we’ve talked about the history of Aliens and how we met them, we’re ready to summarize the archetypical Aliens. This repeats an earlier exercise, but now includes creatures we encounter in both fiction and “true” Alien stories. There are many different types, and we now know their origins. Most of these are encountered in fiction, and only a few are significant players in the “real Alien” mythos.
Little green men. These appeared more in the pulp fiction era and were precursors of Grays. They are found in some of the 1950s UFO movies, which, although often black and white, somehow convey a green-ness to their Aliens. Green Aliens are still found in children’s movies, like Toy Story.
The Grays. These are the most common form of Aliens in reported encounters and in any movie in which the Aliens are nominally real. They are called “Grays” because of the color of their skin. They typically have a large head and forehead, small chin, no nose and almond-shaped, black eyes. The origins of this variant of Alien appears to be the Betty and Barney Hill incident. The eponymous Paul is an alien of this type, as are the Asgard from Stargate, the Visitors from the book Communion, and the Aliens from Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
Angelic Space Brothers. This type of Alien was first encountered by George Adamski. They vary somewhat, but they are described as tall, beautiful, and Nordic in appearance, generally with long hair. (Adamski’s Alien was actually relatively short.) These Aliens are very spiritual and have come to teach us about cosmic harmony. They tend to be a bit arrogant and their motivation for contacting us is to save us from self-destructive behavior. Occasionally they warn us to improve how we act or they will somehow keep us on Earth until we do. Some Alien skeptics have noted that this variant of Alien is very similar to the role that angels once played in society when religion was accepted more universally and that they really have the same function, which is providing an object lesson in knowing how we should behave. Those who believe that the Space Brothers are real point to our legends of angels as proof that they have visited the Earth in the past. One example of this type of Alien is Klaatu from The Day the Earth Stood Still.
Evil insects. They vary in their range of intelligence, so it is ambiguous whether they count as Aliens or mere alien life-forms. Accordingly, whether they are evil or not depends on their intent. Typically they are hunters and killers of humans. The Aliens in the movie Alien and its sequels have an ambiguous intelligence. Perhaps they hunt just to eat and reproduce. The Aliens from Starship Troopers appear to have a sort of hive mentality, with some of the aliens encountered being swarming fighters, while others are more intelligent. We can also include the Formies from Ender’s Game here.
Warriors. These are Aliens who value honor, bravery in battle, and aggressiveness above all. They consider life-forms who do not yearn for combat to be weak and therefore creatures to be conquered and either exterminated or enslaved. The Klingons from the Star Trek universe are iconic versions of this type of Alien, especially those from Star Trek: The Next Generation onward. The Green Martians of Edgar Rice Burroughs’s Barsoom universe are other excellent examples. The Hawkmen of the Flash Gordon comics are warriors, as are the Kzinti of the Larry Niven Ringworld universe. It is possible that the eponymous Predator Alien counts, although it is not completely clear whether his race are hunters or warriors out for a little rest and recreation. Another variant of this archetype are Aliens who are a fighting class of a larger society. Often this variant is not the leader class of the society, and the Jem’Hadar of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and Jaffa of Stargate typify this type.
Cuties. These Aliens are usually designed to get our children to have us part with our hard-earned money. They are cute, often evocative of warm and fuzzy pets, teddy bears, or other cuddly memories. The Ewoks of Return of the Jedi, the Tribbles of Star Trek, E.T. of E.T.: The Extraterrestrial, and maybe ALF are cutie aliens.
Yankee traders. While the historical and earthly Yankee traders were interested in making money, the Alien variant ranges from the merely acquisitive to species for which money is central to their culture. The Ferengi of the Star Trek universe are one example, as are the Psychlos
of L. Ron Hubbard’s classic pulp novel Battlefield Earth.
Shape shifters. These Aliens have an unspecified natural form but can assume the shape of others to blend in, sometimes to hunt. Examples include the changeling assassin in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones, the unnamed Alien in John Campbell’s Who Goes There, the pod people of Invasion of the Body Snatchers, or the race personified by Odo in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Mechanical organic life haters. These are a mechanical form of life or occasionally a mix of organic and robotic components. More often than not, they are driven to exterminate or enslave organic beings. The Borg of the Star Trek universe are one example, as are the Cylons of Battlestar Galactica. Star Trek: The Original Series exploited this form of Alien frequently, with the episodes “The Doomsday Machine” and “The Changeling,” as well as V’ger from the first Star Trek movie. Doctor Who fans will recognize the Daleks as one of this type of Alien. A rare variant is the good robot, for instance the Autobots in the Transformers cartoons and movies.
Gods. These Aliens are so powerful that they can do anything. They often are capricious, sometimes malicious, and sometimes ambivalent. The Organians and the Q of the Star Trek universe are two examples, as are the Goa’uld of the Stargate universe.
Wrap Up and Transition
Thus far, we have discussed the Aliens we have imagined and even dreamed of. Because these Aliens have been our own creation (or have supposedly done us the courtesy of visiting us so we know what they look like), we have had some power over who and what they are; indeed they often are mirrors, reflecting our collective psyche. However there is a real question. Are there real Aliens in the universe? If we ever decide to leave the solar system and travel to nearby stars, what will we find? Are we alone or will we one day join a cosmopolitan galaxy, just one more species among many?
INTERLUDE
The inimitable Mark Twain once wrote in Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar that “truth is stranger than fiction.” Nowhere is that truer than in the discussion of extraterrestrial life. Thus far in this book, we have spoken of fiction and of stories that cannot be confirmed. While it is possible that one or more of the tales told by Arnold or Adamski or the Hills are a factual and accurate rendition of their experiences, anecdotes are an unreliable source of knowledge, no matter how gripping and entertaining.
For a question such as whether Aliens actually exist or what they might look like, we need to turn to science and, to paraphrase Twain, what we learn here is far, far stranger than fiction. Aliens are highly unlikely to be humanoid. The odds of them being able to eat us are nil. The range of the possible is so much broader than the strictures imposed by filmmakers and the need to have a recognizable plot line.
In the next pages, we will go in a different direction, one that is far more likely to teach us something about actual, physical Aliens, rather than Aliens as an earthly, social phenomenon. Biologists have explored some of the myriad possibilities of body plans seen here on Earth in the various mammals, birds, reptiles, and insects. More recent scientific research has considerably broadened our understanding of the various biochemical reactions that can lead to life. Breathing oxygen and exhaling carbon dioxide is an excellent way to keep an organism alive, but it is by no means the only way. Types of life on Earth can exist in environments that would kill you and me, but the range of possible environments on Earth pales compared with those on other planets, environments in which no earthly life would survive. However, scientists know of ways in which other chemicals can combine that would serve the same purposes as our familiar respiration and metabolism, some of which proceed at pressures that would compress you to the size of a pea and temperatures that freeze air completely solid. In order to understand the range of what life might look like, we must explore the range of the possible and delve into the restrictions imposed on life by the physical and chemical rules of matter itself. In these next few chapters, well explore what sorts of things govern the form of real Aliens.
It is important to remember that just because something is physically possible, doesn’t mean it really occurs. If physics and chemistry allow for a particular kind of Alien, it could exist in a distant galaxy and we’ll likely never encounter it. Thus, when we’re asking about what Aliens we’ll encounter if we venture into the galaxy, we should ask the simple question: “But what Aliens actually exist in our stellar neighborhood (if any)?” The safest way to do that is to simply ask them. Literally, as you read this right now, scientists across the globe are listening to the radio hiss of the heavens, hoping to identify the faint crackle that brings to us the voice of our neighbors. We’ll talk about these scientists and their multidecade quest as well. So let’s sit back and dive into what science teaches us about Aliens.
FIVE
LIFE-FORMS
You can see a lot, just by looking.
Yogi Berra
For the first half of the book, we’ve been discussing the history of mankind’s vision of Aliens. If it is easy to see how our ancestors might have been interested in the subject, it is just as easy to see why the idea continues to fascinate us. The question of whether we are alone in the universe is one of the most compelling mysteries of all. This second half of the book explores our modern and scientific thinking. If we ever do meet an extraterrestrial, what is it likely to look like? Can we empirically explore the possibilities?
If we’re going to talk seriously about Aliens, perhaps the place to start is to visit them in their home. Let me transport you to a world never seen before by human eyes. Go ahead and look around. Meanwhile, let me play tour guide and tell the other readers what you’re seeing.
There are no trees in this alien land. There are plants, or at least things that look like plants, but they’re unlike anything you’ve ever seen. Off to your left, a grove of unusual emerald fronds sway gently, rising high above you, like dozens of green ribbons might look if they were stirred by a breeze. Occasional rustling hints of something possibly moving through them unseen.
Those are the most familiar looking of the plants. Off to the right, a peculiar growth has a passing resemblance to a carrot, shorn of its greenery and balanced precariously, with nothing more than the skinny tip stuck in the ground. Only the shape is carrot-like, as the coloring and texture look like a pale strawberry and the cluster of spikes guarantee no bunny is ever going to make a meal of them. Other plants are weirder still. One looks like a cactus, except it is giraffe-spotted and topped by what could be tentacles, seven waving appendages that might or might not be dangerous.
The plant life is unfamiliar, but the animal life is downright freaky. The mystery of the shaking of the green ribbon plants is solved as a truly bizarre creature pokes its nose out from the undergrowth. Of course, “nose” is just a bias of your earthly experiences. As the creature emerges even further, its true shape is revealed. Maybe 5 or 6 inches long, the animal looks like a fat worm, walking on seven pairs of long, unbending, legs, like a Chinese dragon on many stilts. Sprouting from its back are fourteen long and dangerous-looking spines, a clear sign that something thinks of this animal as lunch.
Closer to you, the ground is covered with clean, white sand. A small chitinous creature scuttles around your feet perhaps grazing or possibly just out for a stroll. It looks like a horseshoe crab without a tail, or maybe just a huge beetle, with a segmented back and lots of feet. After it noses at your toes for a moment or two, it resumes its erratic journey. Your eyes follow it as it meanders away.
The sunlight is familiar at least. The bright yellow-white light shines from a clear blue sky, unmarred by clouds. A shadow flits over you, once, twice, and as you look up to see the source, there is a flash at the corner of your eye and you hear a squeal on the ground in the distance in front of you. Looking in that direction, the source of the shadow is revealed. Rising above the ground in a swirl of sand is a large, alien animal, sandy gray in color, with protruding eyes that look like glossy black mushrooms on stubby stems. The two articulated trunks risin
g out of its face are holding the hapless beetle-like creature you saw before. The hunter is a solid mass, with ruffles down both sides, a little like the kind you might see on the hips of a kindergartener as she dips her first toe of summer into the pool. The predator moves by undulating its sides like a cuttlefish, with a smooth and fascinating motion, carrying away its luckless prey. Death has come to this alien world.
The scene I’ve painted here has definitely never been seen by human eyes, but it isn’t fiction. Although my choice of the coloration of the plants and creatures came from our best scientific guesswork rather than knowledge, the scene I have painted for you comes from Earth’s ancient history, below the shallow seas of the Cambrian period (figure 5.1). Plants as we think of them had not yet evolved, although single-celled algae had banded together into plant-like structures, and the sponges and corals of the era might have appeared like vegetation to the modern eye. The articulated beetle is a trilobite, of which there were many individual species, while the fourteen-legged worm bearing thorns is called Hallucigenia (figure 5.2). The fearsome predator of the early ocean with two trunks like a Siamese-twin elephant was Anomalocaris and could grow up to three feet long or perhaps more.
FIGURE 5.1. The plant and animal life of the Cambrian era is visually as alien as many a science fiction movie. While actual extraterrestrial life is likely to be much weirder than this, we can begin to understand the range of the possible by first looking at the great variety of life on Earth over the past half a billion years. © 2006 The Field Museum, Chicago. Illustrations by Phlesch Bubble Productions.
