by Howes, Pam
‘Nothing from Terry?’ Millie asked, slipping her lightweight jacket off and hanging it over the back of a chair. ‘Oh, just look at her.’
She knelt beside Cathy and tickled her under the chin. Cathy stared, and then smiled and held her arms out to Millie.
‘Oh, she’s a little love,’ Millie said, scooping Cathy up for a cuddle.
‘She’s a monkey.’ Alice laughed. ‘And since she started walking you need eyes in your backside once she’s off. My letters from Terry go to his mam’s,’ she added, placing Brian’s letter next to the clock on the mantelpiece. ‘I’ve been expecting one soon as I wrote to tell him about Rodney and I sent another a few days before that. It just takes forever.’ Alice went to put a light under the kettle and then stood waiting in the doorway for it to boil. ‘What about you, what’s happening with Alan?’
Millie shrugged and chewed her lip. ‘I don’t know. I have a gut feeling he’s going to tell me it’s over soon. His letters are so infrequent and so vague, like he’s playing for time. I’m still writing to Terry’s friend Jimmy and we seem to be getting quite friendly. He says he can’t wait to come home to see me again.’
Alice gave Millie a hug; she didn’t quite know what to say. ‘Alan needs a kick up the backside. Jimmy seems to be a very nice man.’
‘I think so. Where’s your mam?’ Millie looked around.
‘She won’t get up. I took her some tea and toast up earlier, but she’s not even touched it. I’ll do a fresh brew in a minute. Anyway, did you go to Rootes?’
‘Yes, and I’m back in full-time on Monday. On riveting the wing frames again with you. Thank God, I was praying like mad that they wouldn’t say I had to do munitions. The thought terrifies me.’
‘Yeah, and me too after what happened to Josie. It breaks my heart thinking about her and how she should still be with us and enjoying her life,’ Alice said. ‘But it’s great that you’re joining us again. I’ll have to meet you at the bus stop as I take Cathy to Terry’s mam’s first thing. And of course I finish at one. But at least we get to spend some time together. I’m so happy that you’re back, I really am.’
‘Let me take your mam’s cuppa up,’ Millie said. ‘She might rouse for me, a different face and all that.’
She put Cathy back down on the rug and Alice gave her half a Farley’s Rusk to chew on while she brewed up. Millie took a cup and saucer up and came back down with the one from earlier and a slice of uneaten toast.
‘Still no response?’ Alice asked, shaking her head worriedly.
‘Nothing, but she’s breathing. She’s probably just exhausted with grief. It does funny things to you. I’d get the doctor in. I think she may need help.’
Alice sighed. ‘Terry’s mam will be here soon for Madam and then I think I’ll nip to the surgery and see if he’ll come out to her. She’s eaten nothing for days and hardly touched a drink.’
‘I’ll stay here while you go,’ Millie offered. ‘Just in case she wakes up for the lavvy or something. We don’t want her falling downstairs because she’s so weak.’
‘Thanks Millie. What would I do without you?’
Doctor Marshall beckoned Alice to follow him downstairs after examining Mam. She hadn’t even acknowledged him, just continued to lie on her side with her eyes tight shut.
‘Alice, I’m going to send for an ambulance. Your mother is very dehydrated so we need to get her on a drip, and she needs feeding up as she’s eaten hardly a thing since your brother’s death was confirmed. We can’t let this go on or she’ll start to have problems with her kidneys and other organs. She’s very depressed and I honestly think she’s in the middle of a complete nervous breakdown. Hospital is the best place for her right now and maybe a nursing home for a few weeks when she shows signs of recovering. Her mental state will be assessed properly. This isn’t something we can do at home; she needs specialist care. I know you’ve done your best to look after her, but it’s time to let us take over.’
He patted Alice on the shoulder. ‘Pack a bag for her and I’ll go back to the surgery and make the arrangements to have her admitted right away. The ambulance will be with you shortly.’
Alice saw Doctor Marshall to the door and thanked him. She went back into the sitting room, where Millie stood by the fireplace chewing her lip. She gave Alice a hug.
‘God, Alice, I’m so sorry. Thank goodness you went to fetch him. She’ll be in the right place to get the help she needs now. I’ll come and baby-sit Cathy while you and Brian go and visit her any time you want. I’m here to help you as much as I can.’
White-faced, Alice nodded. ‘She’s much worse than when Dad died. I need to go back to work. I’ve got Cathy and our Brian to support now, so like you say, she’ll be better in hospital than on her own here.’
‘I’ll clear up in the kitchen while you go and get her a bag packed and I’ll wait here with you until the ambulance comes. Shall I go and let Mrs Lomax know? And would you like me to meet Brian from school and take him to my mam’s for some tea? You may be ages waiting until she’s admitted and you’ve seen she’s settled and everything.’
Alice flung her arms around Millie and burst into tears. ‘Thank you so much. I really need your support right now.’
‘I’m always here for you, Alice, just like you are for me.’
‘Tell Mrs Lomax I’ll be back for Cathy as soon as I can. And will you keep our Brian with you until I get home? Make sure he does his homework if he has any.’
Alice made her way to pick up Brian from Millie’s house after making sure her mam was settled in. She’d left her sleeping comfortably with a drip in her arm to stop any further dehydration. The ward sister had reassured Alice that great care would be taken of her and she would be assessed by the doctor tomorrow morning. Alice had told the sister about her mam’s forgetfulness, which seemed to have been getting worse even before Rodney’s death.
She’d felt a bit easier in her mind as she’d got on the bus outside the hospital gates. Though how she was going to manage to work and look after Cathy and Brian, as well as visit Mam regularly, she didn’t know. It would all need careful thinking about. Perhaps she should give up her Legion job, but then if she did that there would only just be enough money coming in to survive and she’d have nothing left over to save. For a few brief moments she almost wished she’d said no to Terry when he’d asked her to marry him. They should have waited, just got engaged maybe, which they would have done by now without this flipping war making people rush into things just in case. Then she wouldn’t have had Cathy and would be able to work full-time at Rootes. She immediately felt guilty for having such thoughts. Her baby meant the world to her, and so did Terry. She’d manage. She had no choice.
Brian was sitting in the back room at Millie’s with his school books spread out on the table.
‘How’s Mam?’ he asked as Alice came into the room. ‘She’s not gonna die, is she, Alice?’
Alice put her arms around him and gave him a hug. ‘No, love. She just needs a little time being looked after properly. She has to learn to eat again and look after herself. It was the shock of losing Rodney that made her go a bit unbalanced. But the hospital will help her to get right. Best pack your books away in your satchel and then we can go and pick up Cathy from Granny Lomax’s house. Hope you’ve been a good boy for Millie and her mam.’
‘He’s been as good as gold,’ Millie’s mam said, coming into the room. ‘Polished his tea off in a flash and had seconds.’
‘We had sausage and mash with loads of gravy.’ Brian rolled his eyes in ecstasy.
Alice laughed. Nothing dented her brother’s appetite, not even the wartime sausages with hardly any meat.
‘Thank you so much for looking after him. I really appreciate it.’
‘Any time,’ Millie said. ‘We’ve done his spellings for the test tomorrow; I think he’s got a twenty out of twenty there, all his own work as well. He knows his ten, eleven and twelve times tables off to a T. And we’ve done the page
of fractions the teacher set him. Wouldn’t surprise me if he passes his eleven plus next year.’
Brian beamed at the praise. He put on his jacket and school cap and picked up his satchel and gas mask box.
‘Come on then, our Alice,’ he said, marching to the door. ‘Thank you for having me,’ he said to Millie and her mam.
‘I’ll see you in the morning, Alice,’ Millie said, seeing them to the door. ‘I’ll come round when I’m up and ready.’
Alice sighed with relief when she saw that Granny Lomax had a stack of sandwiches and slices of cake waiting on plates on the table. She could eat a scabby horse between two bread vans, as her dad used to say.
‘You must be starving, love. Bet you missed out at dinnertime as well. Has Brian had his tea? Get those down you and I’ll make a brew,’ Granny said as Brian nodded his head. ‘Cathy’s bathed and fed and I’ve tucked her in the little cot in Terry’s room. I know she’s getting a bit too big for it now, but she was falling asleep as she finished her bottle. How did it go at the hospital? What did they say?’
Alice told her what the doctor at home, and then the hospital, had said.
‘Oh dear, you are having a time of it, aren’t you,’ Granny said. ‘She could be away for some time. I’ve been thinking. We need to make life as easy as we can for us all over the next few weeks. I know this is a bungalow and there’s only two bedrooms, but there is a loft room that you get up to by a big ladder that pulls down. Terry used to play with his clockwork trains up there when he was a little lad. My husband boarded the floor so you can walk around and there’s a little window that overlooks the back garden so it can be aired. We could make it into a temporary bedroom for Brian. I’ve a camp bed we can put up and a little cupboard he can put his things in. Then you and Cathy can have Terry’s room again. My neighbour can go and pick up her big cot from your mam’s and then we can lock your house up safely until she’s ready to come home and take charge again. It’s quicker for Brian to walk to school from here and between us we can look after Cathy while you do both your jobs. What do you think?’
Cathy smiled as Brian’s face lit up. He knew the food would be good, at least.
‘Is Terry’s train set still up there?’ he asked, a hopeful expression on his face.
‘It is, and there’s a station and lots of tracks and engines. You could set it all out at one end and sleep at the other.’
Alice felt the weight of the world lift from her shoulders. She could pay for their keep and also save a bit if she wasn’t running the house solely on her wages.
She smiled. ‘Yes please. We would all love that, wouldn’t we, Brian?’
‘We would,’ Brian agreed. ‘Thank you, Granny. And Cathy loves me, so we’ll be a dead good baby-sitting team, you and me.’
‘We will indeed,’ Granny said. ‘It will be my pleasure. Now, as Cathy is settled, why don’t you stay tonight? Brian can have a sleeping bag on the sofa and Terry’s bed is made up as always. Finish your tea and then you can nip home, Alice, and get a change of clothes for you both and make sure all is locked up. And don’t forget to draw the curtains before you turn the lights on while you get your stuff together, and then turn the gas, electric and water off at the main, as well, to be on the safe side.’
As Alice dashed up Linnet Lane and turned the corner towards Lark Lane she bumped into a man hurrying in the opposite direction. He put out his hand to the nearest wall to steady himself and began to apologise at the same time as she recognised him.
‘Oh, Jack, I’m so sorry. I nearly knocked you flying. Are you okay?’ She felt awful for rushing along with her head down. Poor Jack was unsteady on his feet to begin with, without her knocking him over.
‘Alice, where’s the fire?’ he teased.
She smiled and told him where she was going and why.
‘Sorry to hear that,’ he said. ‘Tough time for you lately.’
She nodded. ‘It is, but hopefully it will get a bit easier now. All being well I’ll be in work at the weekend. Have we got any beer to sell yet?’
‘We have, thank goodness. I’m on my way there now, just for a drink and to meet a couple of mates.’
‘You not seeing Maisie then tonight?’
He shook his head. ‘No. I took her to the pictures a couple of times, but she’s not really my type. Bit gobby, and a bit too clingy for me.’ He laughed. ‘Right, I’ll maybe see you on Saturday then. Good luck with everything and I hope your mam gets well soon. Oh, by the way, you might want to tell your mates at Rootes that we’re putting on a big dance for the Yanks from Burtonwood at the end of next month. We’ve booked a good band, that Glenn Miller act we had at the last do. We’ll have a raffle, and we might just have a talent contest, so if you know anybody that wants to do a turn, let me know. We’ve got our lads from the convalescent home coming along as well. Should be a great night, hopefully.’
He waved and limped off up the road as Alice waved back.
She went on her way towards Lucerne Street, a little smile on her face, cheered up by the thought of a good night at the Legion to look forward to.
17
September 1942
Her daughter had just drifted off to sleep as Alice crept out of the bedroom, her black court shoes in hand, and moved quietly down the hall into the sitting room. Granny Lomax and Brian were finishing a game of snakes and ladders, with the wireless playing quietly in the background. Alice smiled. Her little brother had settled in well here and Granny was enjoying looking after him. The loft bedroom was now his temporary home and he’d spent ages arranging and rearranging Terry’s train sets and hours playing up there, talking to himself and his imaginary train drivers, passengers and guards. Mam had spent the first two weeks in hospital while they stabilised her and they had got her eating again and gaining a bit of weight. She was now in a convalescent home over in Crosby; it was the nearest place with a vacant bed that they could get her into, as most of the local homes were looking after injured military staff. They’d been lucky to get somewhere still in Merseyside. But the distance meant that her children could only visit on a Sunday due to Alice’s work and Brian’s school commitments.
‘I’ll be quite late coming home so I’ll see you two tomorrow,’ Alice said, slipping her shoes and black fitted jacket on. ‘Do I look okay?’
‘You look lovely, our Alice,’ Brian said, nodding with approval. ‘Like a proper posh lady.’
‘Very smart indeed,’ Granny said. ‘That skirt is a good fit.’
Alice looked down at the bar uniform the Legion steward had presented her with last weekend. The black skirt was a similar fitted style to what she usually wore, but this one had kick pleats at the front and the neat white blouse had a logo embroidered on the breast pocket with the club name. They’d been made especially for the important event tonight and she’d even been given a pair of silky black stockings that she’d treasure with her life.
‘We’re going a bit posh for this do tonight,’ Alice said. ‘There are flight commanders and lieutenants expected as well as the regular airmen, so the boss wants to create a good impression.’
‘Well I’m sure you’ll do them proud. And good luck to Millie with the talent contest. Ah, there’s the gate squeaking. See you later, Alice.’
Alice dashed to the door and whipped it open before Millie knocked. They linked arms as they hurried up Linnet Lane. Millie had settled back into the routine of working full-time at Rootes and helping her mam out in the evenings with the salon. Alice had adjusted back to her part-time hours and her Legion job. She sometimes worried that she was relying on Granny Lomax too much with all the child-care now falling on her shoulders, but Terry’s mam had told her to stop worrying as she was enjoying having a family to look after again. She said it was good to get up in the morning and feel a sense of purpose about the day, instead of wallowing in self-pity about being widowed and having her only child putting his life on the line daily.
‘At least it’s not raining,’ Millie said. �
�I’ve just spent ages doing my hair and didn’t want to flatten it with a scarf.’
Alice smiled. ‘It looks lovely. Are you nervous about singing later?’
‘A bit,’ Millie admitted. ‘I’ve been practising though, so I hope I’m not too rusty.’
‘Has anyone else from Rootes said they’re going to have a go?’ Alice asked. She rarely got time to chat with her workmates these days, apart from the morning breaks. She left for home when they all clocked off for dinner. She knew that she could stay and eat with them, but didn’t like to take too much advantage of her mother-in-law’s time.
‘Not sure. Norman, one of the janitors, says he’s bringing his squeezebox, so he might give us a turn. Have you sold many tickets?’
Alice nodded. ‘Jack said we’d sold out when I was in last Sunday. The American air force sent a box over last weekend in a jeep with a couple of their young men. They gave us loads of really nice things for the buffet supper: tins of ham and salmon for the sarnies and a couple of boxes of chocolates, silk stockings and cigars for the raffle. They even sent a good bottle of liquor called bourbon. Jack had his eye on it, but the boss locked it in the safe.’ Alice laughed. ‘It should be a really good night. I’m looking forward to it.’
‘Me too,’ Millie said as they walked up to the entrance doors of the club. ‘I’ll give you a hand with the tables seeing as I’ll be in before any other customers tonight.’
Jack waved to them as they made their way across to the bar and hung their coats on the back of the staffroom door.
‘Can you give Winnie a hand in the kitchen please, Millie? She’s struggling to get everything plated up for later. She’s made a mountain of sarnies and they’re in danger of toppling onto the floor.’
