Sweet Destiny (The Jessica Sweet Trilogy Book 3)

by Aliya DalRae

  I felt Raven nod his head, and I knew he understood. It was easy for the animal part of him to forgive. For the beast, it was a simple matter of claiming me, period. For Raven, it was a little more complicated, just as it was for me.

  I know he was dealing with emotions unfamiliar to him. With the beast satisfied, it had to be hard for him to focus on everything else without the anger clouding his view. Now he was going to have to take a long, hard look at what I had done to us, and decide how he really felt. And I had to do the same.

  “I don’t know how to do this, Raven. I don’t know how to go on from here.”

  “Neither do I, amante, but I know I have to try. The creature inside me has chosen you. I can only acquiesce.”

  “There you go, talking all flowery again,” I teased, but my heart wasn’t in it.

  Raven’s phone rang then, interrupting, and he reached into a pocket of his leathers to retrieve it. At the same time there was a loud knock at the door, or rather a pounding, and I had a feeling I knew who it was. I left Raven to his phone call and rose to answer the door.

  As expected, Harrier stood in the threshold, looking rather flustered.

  “What the hell, Jessica? We leave you two alone for five minutes, and off you go, running around the place like you weren’t lying in a hospital bed a few minutes ago. Your aunt is frantic!”

  “Rachel is frantic?” I asked with a smile, and motioned him inside, ignoring his snarling.

  Raven was stashing his phone, so whoever had called was quick and to the point.

  “Harrier,” he said. “What’s up?”

  Harrier ignored him and addressed me instead. “Is everything okay here, then?” he asked, dragging a meaty paw through his already tousled hair.

  “We’re fine,” I insisted.

  “Does he know?”

  “Know what?” Raven asked, joining us by the door.

  “Stop it, Raven. Yes, he knows.”

  “Any problems?”

  “No, why would there be?” I asked.

  “Jessica, we don’t know what’s happening with you. You need to stick near the clinic, where Allon can keep an eye on you.”

  “Allon can shove his tests up his…”

  “Raven,” I said.

  “I promised you, no tests, Jessica. I won’t let them use you like that.”

  “How do you expect us to learn what is happening to her if we don’t let the Doc check her out?” Harrier said. “Do you really think I’d let them do anything to my niece that would cause her harm?”

  They were nose to nose now, and me with no garden hose in sight. I needed to deescalate the situation, and fast.

  “It’s fine, Raven. There’s more than my—transformation—that needs checking. Harrier, tell Allon I’ll be down in a bit.”

  Harrier opened his mouth to argue but thought better of it. “Fine,” he said, then, “Fine.” And he opened the door to leave.

  “Harrier,” I said, before he closed the door. He peeked back inside and I went to him, kissing him on the cheek. “Thank you,” I whispered. Heat radiated from his skin as his face flushed.

  “For what?” he asked, shifting his feet.

  “For everything.”

  Harrier shrugged, patted me on the head and headed off to let Allon know I was on my way.

  When the door closed behind him I turned back to Raven and asked, “Who was on the phone?”

  “Allon, believe it or not. He’s concerned about you, too.”

  “I guess we should head back to the Medical Wing, then, huh?

  “Are we good here?” Raven asked, and I could feel he had so much more to say. We both did, really.

  “For now,” I said, holding a hand out to him. “You coming with?”

  “Always, amante. Always.”

  Chapter Fifty-Nine

  W hen we reached the Med Wing, we could tell something big was going on. People were running back and forth and there was a general air of, not panic really, but anxiety in their steps.

  Raven and I returned to my room, and I looked at the bed I had so recently vacated. All of a sudden, I was exhausted. A nap sounded like a great idea.

  Raven watched me kick off my shoes and climb under the covers, seeming at a loss for what he should be doing. I patted the mattress beside me, and he hesitated a short moment before toeing off his sneakers and crawling in beside me. I snuggled under his arm, and he drew me in close. With my head on his chest, the steady beat of his heart thrumming in my ear, I was asleep in no time.

  I don’t know how long I slept, but when I woke it was to a boatload of commotion. Raven was no longer in bed with me but was standing near the door with Allon. From the sound of things, he was telling the doc to leave me alone for now, but Allon was insistent.

  “This concerns you both, and I would rather it not wait.”

  “I’m awake, Raven. Let him in.”

  Raven turned to me, and I nodded. “Whatever he has to say, let’s hear him out.”

  “Thank you, Jessica.” The doctor approached my bedside and asked, “How are you feeling?”

  “Tired, mostly,” I said. “I feel like I’ve run a marathon.”

  Allon smiled that reassuring smile of his and patted my hand. “To be sure,” he said. “You’ve been through a lot in a very short time.”

  He was right, of course. Only two days ago I suffered a gruesome loss, underwent surgery, almost died, and now I was a Vampire. A full plate for anyone, really.

  “Do you mind if I give you a quick examination?” he asked. “I’m sure you have healed completely of all your trauma, but with the miscarriage and the surgery—everything you’ve gone through—it never hurts to be sure.”

  “Of course, I said, wiggling out of my sweat pants and scooting to the end of the bed to assume the position. “Raven, you might want to step outside for a minute.”

  “Why?” he asked.

  “Because the exam he’s about to perform is a bit…personal… and given past experience, I thought you might not want to watch.”

  “I’m good,” Raven said. “I’m not leaving.”

  I glanced at Allon, and he shrugged. Having him in the room wasn’t the best way to relax, but Allon was quick and Raven’s growl was mostly stifled, so we moved on to the next topic at hand.

  Addressing me, Allon asked, “So are we all up to date on what’s been going on with you, Jessica?” His discrete way of asking if Raven knew about my Vampirosity.

  “Yep,” I said, trying to remain upbeat, but it was difficult, all things considered.

  “Well, Raven, if you would like to come take a seat with Jessica, there are some details we need to discuss.”

  Raven did as he was told and sat in the chair next to my bed. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it as though he were expecting really bad news.

  “Raven, you are aware of the changes that have developed in Jessica, the awakening of her Vampire genetics.”

  “Jessica told me,” Raven said, caution drawing his words out as he prepared for the worst. I almost laughed. I mean, how much worse could things get? But then I was thinking from my own perspective.

  “Jessica, about the baby.” My whole body throbbed at the mention of Baby M. With everything else going on, other than my brief breakdown, I hadn’t really taken a proper moment to grieve my loss. Having Allon mention the child so clinically produced emotions I wasn’t prepared to deal with just now.

  “I’m sorry,” he said, “to bring up such a tender topic, but there are things you need to know.” Okay, he was off the hook for now.

  “In the course of treating you, I took blood and tissue samples and sent them out for testing. I have received the preliminary results from the lab, one of our own, of course, and well, to say I was surprised is an understatement.”

  “Doc,” Raven said. Nothing else, but it spurred Allon on.

  “We’ve all been working under the assumption that the child was part human/Vampire, part Feline Shifter. However, the results are showing
no indication of the fetus having any Shifter DNA at all.”

  “It was Malcolm’s,” I interjected. “There was no one else, I swear!”

  “Think a moment, Jessica. I’m sure you can think of one other person.”

  “No, only Malcolm and Raven, but…” What he was saying was slowly sinking in, for me at least. Raven seemed to be having trouble keeping up.

  “Allon, are you saying that the baby was human and Vampire only?”

  “That is exactly what I’m saying, with a heavy emphasis on Vampire. That child was never Malcolm’s. It was Raven’s all along.”

  “But you said that was all but impossible. You told me…”

  “I did,” Allon said, his brows drawn in a troubled frown. “And I cannot begin to apologize for my assumptions. Apparently, the genetic changes had advanced far enough for you to be able to conceive, but not enough for you to carry the child to term. There was simply too much human left in you, and as the baby grew, a mostly Vampire baby, your body began to reject it. I’m sorry Jessica, Raven, very sorry for your loss.”

  Allon squeezed my hand, patted Raven on the shoulder and left us to process.

  Harrier had tried to make me consider this possibility, but I wouldn’t hear of it. All this time, all this pain, all of the hatred and anger. And poor Malcolm, dying to protect a child that wasn’t even his.

  I looked at Raven and saw the same pain I was feeling reflected back at me in his eyes. However, there was more behind his expression than simple shock.

  If I were a betting person, I would call it hope.

  Chapter Sixty

  R achel followed the Soldier back to the Medical Wing, but she wasn’t thrilled about it.

  Things had gotten quiet with Raven and Jessica, too quiet. So, she and Harrier went to check on them, only to find the room empty and Jessica’s clothes gone. There was no telling what might happen to the girl, especially if things got emotional between the two, and Rachel and Harrier were desperate to find her. Well, she was desperate. Harrier was downright frantic.

  She’d nearly caught up with Harrier, who’d left for the Residential Wing no doubt, when this Soldier waylaid her and forced her back to where she started.

  Of course, his request had her immediately thinking of Jessica, but he assured her that this was unrelated to anything concerning her niece.

  “I don’t understand why you could possibly need me, if it’s not Jessica,” she said for the tenth time.

  “Yes, ma’am,” was all he’d say, stupid boy, so she followed along, obedient as a well-trained puppy.

  When they reached their destination, a room two down from Jessica’s, the Soldier opened the door and motioned her inside.

  Irritation drained out of her like water through a sieve. Children. Two adorable, but decidedly filthy, children lay in the dual beds, and both were watching her with matching scowls.

  Mason was standing at the far end of the room, talking to Allon in hushed tones. He looked up and nodded toward the children, saying, “These two have been asking for you.”

  Both children’s eyes widened, the girl’s in surprise and hope, the boy’s in doubt and—hope.

  “Who’re you?” the boy demanded, trying to hide the kernel of longing she felt emanating from him.

  “I’m Rachel,” she said, approaching the beds and standing between them, but keeping her focus on the boy. “What’s your name?”

  He hesitated, but said, “I’m Talon. She’s Sapphire…”

  “Phire,” came a small voice to Rachel’s left.

  “Her name is Sapphire, but she insists everyone call her Phire,” Talon said, as though he’d had to explain this a million times. “I think it’s stupid, but she’s a girl. What can you do?”

  Rachel turned to the girl and said, “If you prefer Phire, then Phire it is.” This elicited a triumphant smile from the girl, shot directly at the boy.

  “Are you really her?” Phire asked, the desperate yearning in her voice and in Rachel’s heart, near overwhelming.

  “Who is it you think I am, child?” Rachel asked the question, but that red hair and those cheekbones—there was no doubt.

  “She said you would take care of us. If you’re really her.” Rachel moved closer to Phire and took the child’s smaller hand in her own.

  “Do you feel that?” Rachel asked.

  “Your hand?” the girl replied, and Rachel smiled.

  “No, dear, inside you. Do you feel it?”

  Phire nodded slowly, eyes widening in surprise. “What is it?”

  “That, child, is family. It’s love. You’re Rebecca’s children, aren’t you?”

  “How did you know that?” The boy’s question sounded more an accusation, so she turned to him and smiled.

  “Because I can feel you, too. Your fear, your hope, your longing. I feel it all through our family bond.”

  “I’ve never felt anything like this from Her,” Talon argued, “and she’s our mother.”

  “That’s because my sister is incapable of love. She is a selfish female who doesn’t think further than—well, never mind. You’re here now, you’re safe, and I won’t let anything happen to you, either of you,” she added with a pointed look at Phire. “Never again.”

  “What about the laws they said we broke?” Phire began to cry again. “Are they going to hang us?”

  “Absolutely not,” Rachel said. “Wherever did you get such an idea?” Rachel glared at Mason, who still hovered in the background with the doc, and the male shrugged. Idiot.

  “Have a rest, children. We’ll find you some clean clothes and a proper room to stay, then you and I will get acquainted, right Warlord?”

  Mason cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders. “As you say, Rachel.” And with that, he took his cue and left the family on their own.

  Chapter Sixty-One

  R aven was finding it difficult to breathe. In through the nose, out through the mouth. And again, and again. Emotions were raging through him, too many to count, too many to follow. First was the elation, learning he was the father of Jessica’s child, followed instantly by gut wrenching sorrow. She had carried his baby for three months, and he had been there for exactly none of it. In fact, he had done everything possible to ensure that they would be apart.

  But then, back up the roller coaster. He and Jessica had gotten pregnant. Because of her genetic makeup, the one thing he thought he’d never be able to give her was a possibility. They would be able to have children, to have a family, a real life together.

  And then back down. They had lost their first child. Would it have been a boy or a girl? Would it have had Raven’s dark coloring, or Jessica’s chestnut hair and ice blue eyes? Would it have grown up loving him, as he heard children could do, or would it have learned stories about his dark past and been afraid of him?

  When their eyes met, Raven could see Jessica going through her own list of what ifs as more flooded his mind. What if Raven hadn’t killed Malcolm? Would they have gone on believing the child was part Shifter? Would that gods damned cat have raised his child? Or would they have figured it out before it was too late? What if he and Jessica had worked things out without all the violence? Would they have raised the child together never knowing it was truly their own? What if they had done DNA testing, or a simple blood test, for chrissakes?

  What if?

  The amusement park ride abandoned Raven on the downswing, as they do, and left him with a feeling of utter loss. Jessica lifted a hand to his face, and it wasn’t until he saw the crimson on her fingers that he realized he was crying. He was still grasping her hand, like a lifeline, and she pulled him onto the bed, into her arms.

  They had been pregnant, and now their baby was dead.

  The words repeated over and over in his mind, a constant loop of despair. He had never had a chance to love it, to know the sound of its little heartbeat in her womb, and yet the loss was as complete to him as if he’d raised the young one to adulthood.

  Losing Je
ssica had been torture beyond measure, but there had always been that little place in the back of his mind telling him they would someday be together again.

  This loss was complete, permanent. There would be no coming back from it, and so they cried. Tears for the child they would never know, the holidays they would never share, the firsts that would never happen.

  They cried for the time they could never get back, for the future that would never be. The tiny hand they would never hold and the birthday candles that would never be blown out. The Christmas presents that would never be opened, and the Halloween costumes that would never be worn.

  They cried because when something like this happens, there is little else you can do. You can yell and scream, shout to the universe about the unfairness of it, but really, what good is that? You can withdraw from the world, put a wall between you and everything else because the pain is so great that nothing and no one will ever be able to alleviate it. Or you can bury yourself in your misery because the thought of doing anything else is unbearable.

  To Raven these all seemed like viable options, but he rejected them as quickly as they materialized. This was a shared pain, not his alone. More than anything he wanted to take the sadness and tears away from Jessica and into himself so he wouldn’t have to watch her suffer. He wanted to free her from the emptiness in her soul, an emptiness he felt through that unusual connection they shared. A connection that now had a name, an explanation.

  For he knew, without a doubt, that he and Jessica had Linked, and that they were destined to be together forever. There would be more children, many more children, and they would grow ancient together as they watched their young grow. This he also knew with the certainty of the sun and the moon.

  But today, in this moment that would stand frozen for them for all eternity, today they cried.

  Chapter Sixty-Two

  S on of a bitch. No, sister of a bitch, because that’s exactly what she was dealing with. Her sister, the bitch. She’d done it again, only there were two this time! Two precious children, dumped in a town where they knew absolutely no one and left on their own.