by Shauna Allen
“Right,” I agreed, though my stomach dropped. What he said was absolutely true, but it was still disappointing somehow. Yes, I was only in town temporarily, and yes, we could have a little no strings fun, but that didn’t stop my heart from wishing for more.
Stupid heart.
Inside, the mouthwatering scents of spices and grilling meats filled the air, along with canned mariachi music from hidden speakers. The walls were bright salmon and teal with even brighter artistic renderings of sombreros and animals.
Jude smiled at the hostess. “Está bien mi mesa de siempre?”
“Sí.” Her smile was definitely appreciative. I couldn’t blame her. Hearing that accent had me swooning a bit myself.
He passed her up and led me to a corner booth.
I slid in and picked up the menu on the table. “Come here often, I take it?”
“Just once or twice a week.”
I stared at him, slack-jawed.
His chest rumbled with rich laughter. “Maybe not that much, but yeah, I come enough.”
“Enough to have your own table?”
“Busted.”
I glanced at the menu. “So, what’s good here?”
“Everything. Mamacita’s is as close to my mama’s cooking as you can get without going home.”
“Where’s home?”
“The Bronx.”
“Wow. Do you miss it?”
“New York? Honestly, no. I do miss my family though.”
“Especially your mother, I take it?”
“Yeah.” He paused while we were served ice water and chips and salsa and we placed our orders—him in Spanish. I followed his lead and got the tamale plate. “I miss my mom . . . most of the time.”
I dipped a chip and took a bite. “Just most of the time?”
“She’s your typical mom, I guess. She wants me to settle down and give her some grandbabies. She can be a little pushy about it sometimes. But, other than that, yeah, I miss her and my brother and sister. Family’s all you’ve got, you know?”
“Yeah.” I looked down and sipped my water as bittersweet emotion rolled through me.
“Did I say something wrong?”
I glanced up. “No. I think that’s great. I just miss my dad, is all.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I miss him, but I have a great mom and now a sister that I would’ve maybe never known about if he were still alive.”
He frowned, confused.
“Rachel’s mom was his wife. I was the product of an affair basically. His shameful secret, though he never made me feel that way. He loved me and my mom the best he could.”
“Wow. So, you found each other after he died?”
“Yes. Rachel found information in his stuff that led her to me. The rest is history.”
“No bitterness?”
I shook my head. “No. None. I think we were just happy to know each other . . . and it didn’t hurt to get a big sister who looks just like me.” I wrapped a curl around my finger. “I grew up with lots of Little Orphan Annie jokes. She got it.”
His eyes warmed like the embers of a fire on a cold night. “I don’t see Little Orphan Annie.”
My heart trilled and spilled over in a rush. “What do you see?”
Those embers flared to life in a blaze. “I see you.”
“Me?”
“I think so.”
I swallowed, overcome by his intensity and the way he drew me in like the tide to the shore. God, he could burn me, but I’d surrender to the fire willingly if it meant he’d look at me like this forever. “And what’s that?”
Our hands were suddenly linked on the table and I stared down at our interlaced fingers, large and small, rough and soft, dark and light.
“I see a beautiful, sweet, smart, sexy woman who I’m dying to get to know better.”
My eyes flew up. No one had ever spoken to me like that. No one.
Our waitress approached with our food and he drew his hand away, smiling pleasantly at her as she set steaming plates in front of us. “Gracias.” He picked up his fork and dug in like his world hadn’t just tilted totally off its axis.
Jude was a wonder. After spouting off words hot enough to melt my panties, he eased into friendly conversation while we ate and I found myself comfortable enough to tell him more about my dreams of owning my own shop.
“I’m thinking of calling it Red’s.” I used to hate the nickname when Blake and the guys gave it to me, but I quickly learned it was their way of showing affection so I’d embraced it.
Jude glossed right over that. “So, you just wanna do straight-up auto shop stuff, or are you going to get into restorations, too?”
Something inside me softened at how he automatically believed in my dream, as if it was a given. “I’ll probably start with basic automotive maintenance and repairs, then as it grows, move into more stuff. If it grows.”
“Of course it will.”
I nodded my appreciation as I finished the last bite of tamale. “You were right. That was delicious.”
“I know, right? Almost as good as Mom’s.”
“Tell me more about her.”
He sipped his drink as his eyes took on a faraway look. “She’s great.” His dimpled grin was adorable. “Pushy, but great. Our dad left when I was six so she had to work extra hard to keep us afloat and off the streets. She worked as many as three jobs at once just so we could have new winter coats and my sister, Bianca, could get dance lessons.”
“She sounds wonderful.”
“She is.” He bit his tongue as he seemed about to say something more. I fantasized he was thinking about me meeting his mother.
Too soon. Too fast. Too everything.
Slow down, Aubrey.
I killed that particular line of thought and instead told him about home and my mom’s cooking, which was sadly not anywhere near gourmet, but I never starved.
“Any brothers or sisters other than Rachel?” he asked.
“Rachel has an older brother, Weston, but we’re not really close. He’s had a hard time with our parent’s relationship. And I guess Jesse, too. He’s become like the big brother I never had. He’s taught me so much about cars and life.”
“Any good life lessons to share?”
My gaze drifted out the window to the horizon that seemed a million miles away. I debated how much of Jesse’s history to share. I didn’t want to spread his private business around, but then again, he’d never kept his past a secret. I met Jude’s eyes. “Jesse was in prison for several years for assault. He was on parole when he and Rachel got together.”
Jude’s face was slack with disbelief. “Rachel . . . the lawyer, right?”
I laughed. “That’s the one. They knew each other in high school. Mad crush. Unrequited love, and all that. To hear her tell it, she was just waiting for the chance to snatch him up. His past didn’t matter to her.” My eyes dipped. “I guess that’s the power of true love.”
He said nothing for several moments and I finally peered back up. His expression was thoughtful as he gazed out at the same horizon I’d been studying. His voice was whisper soft. “I guess you can find a whole lot of life lessons in that if you’re willing.”
I agreed. I had no idea about the angry, wounded Jesse that had nearly killed a man, but I knew the Jesse who had emerged a better person and I found myself gushing about how much I loved him and how perfect he and my sister were together with their growing family. “I can’t wait to meet their new baby in a few weeks.”
Jude’s entire body loosened and lit up like a lightbulb. “How awesome.”
It was awesome. I told him about their daughter, Avery, as he paid the bill and led me out of the restaurant.
“Do you have to get back to the hotel right away?”
“No.” My voice was breathless with the unexpected change of topic.
“Good.” He opened my door and waited for me to slide inside without elaborating.
Seven
/> Jude
We left Mamacita’s and headed south. I really wanted to take Aubrey to Stillhouse Hollow Lake, but it was too dark. Instead, I took her to base. I tipped my head at my buddy, Jones, who was manning the front gate as he waved us through.
Fort Hood wasn’t exactly a tourist destination, but I found myself wanting to share a piece of myself with her. The Army, and Texas in particular, had become my home away from home and I longed to share that with someone.
I showed her the squadron, the base gym, the barracks I’d lived in until I gained enough rank to move to my own place. She took it all in stride, asking lots of questions like she was truly interested. Not just in Sergeant Cortez, not the guy with the garage and more than a passing knowledge of cars, not the Mexican guy from the Bronx. Just me. Just Jude.
She shifted to me as I pointed out the base park, illuminated by the moon and one streetlamp. “Pull over?”
I parked in the empty lot and killed the engine to follow her as she headed for the swings. I leaned against the support beam and watched her sit and kick her legs to get started, a carefree smile on her face as she gained speed and height. The breeze rustled her copper curls around her face as she swung even higher. To her left, the lone streetlight cast a lonely pool of light on the ground, so we were virtually in the dark except for the moon above that painted her features like some kind of sweet fairy.
“What? Too old to swing?” she taunted, her giggle floating on the air like fairy dust.
“Nope.”
“How old are you, anyway?”
“Twenty-four.”
“And your mom already wants you to settle down?”
“It’s a cultural thing.”
She nodded, but didn’t say anything else as she kicked her legs and turned her face to the sky.
I couldn’t resist. I sat in the swing next to her and began pumping my legs to catch up. The wind whooshed through my ears as I mimicked her carefree joy. Joy I hadn’t experienced with such abandon in so long, too afraid to shirk my obligations to everyone but myself.
“I’ll bet you think I’m just a kid like the rest of the guys.”
I glanced over as our rhythm lined up and we swung back and forth, back and forth, in perfect sync. “Not at all.”
“What do you think?” Her voice had become breathy and windblown.
“I thought I already told you at dinner.”
“Anything else?”
What did she want from me? Her eyes, dark as night, caught and held me captive as we rushed through the summer breeze together, the creak of the swing echoing around us. In that moment, the truth bubbled up in my chest and burst free. “I think I really want to kiss you.”
She said nothing, just studied me as she stopped kicking and let her swing slow to a stop. I toed the sand and halted next to her.
“Really?”
I nodded, my eyes dipping to her mouth. Who wouldn’t want to kiss those lips?
“Why don’t you?”
Those words, the promise in them, filled the warm air like a raincloud promising the relief of rain. And I had been living in the desert.
I gripped the chain on the side of her swing closest to me and drew her over. Keeping her close, I gently unpeeled her white-knuckled grip from the chain and thread our fingers together. I licked my lips and sucked in a deep gulp of her scent. Her pupils dilated as I inched closer until our breath mingled. I’d swear I could hear her heart galloping like a wild stallion in her chest, but maybe that was my own.
Her eyelids fluttered closed as I grazed her lips with mine. God, she was sweet. I tasted the seam of her lips and she opened to me with the same abandon she’d shown as she swung through the air. She clutched my shirt and leaned into me, our mouths fused like magnets. It was like we’d been born for this moment, everything within us lining up like two halves finally making the whole they longed to be. Peace and lust and fireworks and a tinge of fear roiled within me as I kissed her with the fervor of a religious experience. In that moment, she was my salvation.
She pulled away, her breathing ragged as she faced the sky.
I studied her profile, struggling to calm my raging emotions. I’d never felt this way before. Alive with the fierce energy of a livewire. I needed to know if she felt it too. I opened my mouth to ask, but she beat me to it.
“That was intense.”
“You could say that.”
Wordlessly, we began to swing again, gentler this time.
“Is that okay?” I finally asked, desperate to know her heart.
“Yeah. It’s just . . .”
“What?”
She glanced my way. “It’s crazy.” She bit her lip as if in deep thought. “I’m a little surprised. And turned on. And confused.”
A wry laugh escaped me as she echoed my thoughts with blazing honesty. “That makes two of us.”
We swung a bit higher. “So, what happens now?”
My stomach clenched into a fist. “What do you want to happen?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know, hence the confusion. All I know is I’ve never felt like this about anyone before and we’ve just met. That’s either totally insane or totally meant to be. I’m leaning toward insane.”
“Well, I’m leaning toward meant to be.”
Her legs stopped pumping as she flew to face me. “What?”
I kept going. “Here’s the thing, Aubrey. I had to grow up really fast, so I learned to listen to my gut and I don’t pull any punches. ‘No regrets’ is my life motto. I say what I mean and I mean what I say and I go after what I want.”
“And you want me?”
“You have no idea.”
“Huh.”
“Does that scare you?”
“No. Not really.” She thought a moment. “But that still leaves us to decide what that all means. We have totally different lives, hundreds of miles apart. What can possibly happen past this month?”
“I don’t know.” I did know that I had no right to expect anything of her. We had our own lives and were working toward our own dreams. It wouldn’t be fair to ask anything more of her than this brief time we had together.
“Well . . .” She slowed and jumped off to land on her feet in the sand. “We’ve got tonight. Let’s go get some ice cream.”
~ ~
It was nearly midnight by the time I got her back to the hotel. After the park, we got ice cream cones and drove around town, talking and laughing until I caught her stifling a yawn.
The parking lot was quiet, the Jack ‘Em Up diesel truck parked next to the flatbed, but no other sign of any of her self-appointed guardians.
“Goodnight, Aubrey.” My voice rumbled like the grit from a boulder.
Her seatbelt unbuckled with a click. “You gonna ask me out again?”
Our eyes met in the dark. “Do you want me to?”
“Do you really think there’s something meant to be about us?”
“I do.”
“Then, yeah, I want you to.”
“Even if things have to end when you leave town?”
“We can cross that bridge when we come to it. Now ask me out so I can kiss you again.”
I laughed at her refreshing boldness and realized I hadn’t smiled this much in a long ass time. “Okay. Go out with me again tomorrow . . .” I checked my watch. “Tonight.”
She frowned. “I said ask. Don’t tell. It’s presumptuous.”
“But you just said—”
“I know what I said. Now hurry up, Cortez. I don’t have all night.” She bit her bottom lip against a smile.
I cupped her jaw in my palm. “Beautiful, sweet Aubrey, will you please go out with me again tonight?”
Her eyes softened as she leaned into my hand. “Much better.”
“Is that a yes?”
“It’s a yes. Now will you kiss me again?”
I dove in and let myself drown in her taste, but I was still less than satisfied when I had to let her go. I watched her walk away and knew, withou
t a shadow of a doubt, that I’d never get enough of that girl. I was in deep, deep trouble.
~ ~
Bright and early the next morning, Fletch was banging on my door. “Up and at ‘em, Romeo. Time to get to work.”
I stifled a groan and padded to the door in my boxers. “You’re entirely too cheerful for this time of morning.”
He greeted me with an unrepentant grin. “What do you mean, Cortez? I’ve been up for three hours already.” He handed me a bag. “Here. Breakfast from the woman. She’s been experimenting with muffin recipes. I can vouch for the banana nut.” He spun around. “Get dressed and meet me in the garage. The guys’ll be here at 0900.”
I scratched my chest and peered down into the delicious smelling bag. That gave me time to eat at least one of these bad boys. I grabbed one and stuffed a bite in my mouth as I moved to get dressed.
After sliding on work jeans and an old T-shirt, I started a big pot of coffee and finished off my muffin. I found Fletch in the garage, his big body crowded under the frame of his poor Charger.
“It’s fucked, huh?” he said as I got closer.
“Apparently. But it’ll be up and running and perfect in no time. These guys are really good.”
He inched out and met my gaze. “The girl’s good, too, isn’t she?”
I nodded and focused on a flaking bit of rust.
“Cute little thing.”
I agreed noncommittally, not sure where this was going.
“Cortez.”
I faced him, bracing myself for the lecture about how I shouldn’t mess with her, she was too young, we had no future, the Army should be my life, blah, blah, whatever.
He shocked me when his expression softened. “It’s okay to want it all, Jude. If you work your ass off, you can have anything . . . do anything. Hell, look at me and my girls. They’re my life, but so is my job. It works because it’s right. She’s right.”
“What’re you saying? It was one date. We just met.”
His eyes narrowed as he seemed to see to the heart of me. “Time doesn’t matter. Truth does. What does your gut tell you is true?”
