by Erme Lander
Mika had lessons in fencing as well as medicine and science, maths and languages. She had the edge in language, speaking and writing two helped. To her disappointment, Cassai was not one they were expected to learn. The two girls kept the other boys on their toes, proving they could keep up both intellectually and also physically with the fencing lessons.
Staring down the point of a rapier into the laughing face of another girl wasn’t funny and she didn’t have the weight to push through like the boys did. Fencing was a skill she’d not learnt with her brother and it took a concentration that left her sweating. She focused on her lessons with Gavin, finding what worked best for her. Her fitness improved with the lessons from Gavin and he regularly paired her off with another guard to see her technique. With her days full she had no time to think about Fenin. Her dreams were fuzzy with deep sleep, wrapped up in the learning of the previous day.
Weeks turned into months of learning before she knew it. Ackbarr had a gentle temperate climate, sheltered by the mountains and the seasons turned slowly. The winds blowing off the plains fed warm air into the city. Late summer was approaching, the hot sunlight reflecting off the black walls and dipping low off the rooftops in the evenings with spectacular colours.
Belindros called her into his office one morning. “I’ve had the reports on you. I’m pleased.” Never one to beat about the bush, he carried on, “You may have noticed the other apprentices have boys to train. I think you can manage one now.”
Mika gulped. She’d seen the boys, about twelve years old, running around. They looked a handful. Some were boys wanting to become apprentices, like Enos, their families hoping to catch the eye of a Medici to sponsor them. Most were the sons of noblemen, their fathers looking for them to learn a few skills for minor wounds on the battlefields. She would be expected to keep them learning and out of trouble.
He smirked at her discomfort, “Come with me to the palace, I’ll introduce you and you can decide in the next week or so. It doesn’t have to be one of them, but it’s usual. Do your best to keep their noses clean. Pain in the arses, the lot of them.”
They walked slowly to the palace, Belindros talking further on his expectations of the boy she would teach. He interrupted himself to wave at a few scantily clad ladies leaning out of their windows, they waved back, blowing kisses. “Look at those women, just look at them.” Belindros sighed as he noticed the reluctance on her face, mistaking it for shyness. He shook his head, “Damn it boy, you’ve got the youth, I’ve got the willing. I’d swap everything for a day in your flesh.” Mika stifled a giggle at the thought of Belindros in her flesh and sobered, thinking about his reaction to her true sex.
Belindros showed her the boys – none of them appealed. All superior, knowing their places and bored of the lessons, no spark. She anticipated having problems with all of them.
“Watch them for a while, see who you like.” Belindros left with a smirk for her discomfort.
Mika tried, they were all so sure of themselves she thought in despair. They were polite when she asked them to do things, silently smug at her struggles. Hesitantly Mika picked a boy that looked bright and tidy for his age. Orai was twelve, confident in his abilities and talkative. After only a few days, he was running rings around her and she’d got fed up with supervising him.
High spirits were one thing, but he constantly wound her up, she couldn’t get him to do anything, trust him with anything. Everything broke in his hands. He refused to sleep in the cubby hole, had to go back to his parents every night and came in late every morning. His eyes grew wide at any accusations she made, until her eyes stung at night with frustration. Mika thought of the other Medici apprentices and how careful their boys were. She’d been saddled with a brat. She was now starting to agree with Belindros about boys and their habits.
Jon had whinged about her deliberately missing him on her first afternoon off. He caught her on the way to the palace a few days later, telling her that he knew all apprentices had time off. He winkled out when the next one would be and waited at the gates to the courtyard. She thought at first he was just there for the pies she bought. When he kept finding her, she realised he also liked talking to her. In return he took her all over the city, insisting first she remove her robes and showed her the places she’d never have dared go near on her own. Even there, he was known, a grudging smile or grunt in his direction. The kick or cuff often restrained at his piping comments.
She grumbled about Orai to Jon.
“Show him who’s boss.”
“I try, he doesn’t listen.”
“If I don’t listen then I get a hiding. It’s simple.” Jon’s face crinkled, not understanding.
“I can’t hit him, he’s the same age as my little brother, I wouldn’t hit Petron.”
Jon shook his head, “You’re going to have to do something.” He changed the subject, “Have you seen the new pie trader?” Mika laughed and went with Jon to find him.
Primal forest with huge tree trunks, dim light and the muscular grace of a large predator sliding through the undergrowth. Mika twitched, caught up in her dream. Moss and still pools, gnats swarming above. The crashing of beasts in the distance and the humming of bees. Birds in the trees sounding their alarm calls. Threading her way through, her viewpoint low, blinking in the green light. No concern of getting lost, too many signposts in the featureless forest. She woke sweating, her muscles tense and trembling.
Mika wondered about that night in Fenin, remembering how upset and frustrated she’d been. Still confused over what had actually happened, she analysed every aspect she remembered. All she could recall was the intensity of the dream she’d had and the feeling of being in something else’s flesh. She checked her lock, making sure it was secure and feeling ridiculous, tried making herself angry. It didn’t work. She lay staring into the dark and gave up, disgusted with herself for encouraging a fantasy.
As she grew less tired she began to dream more, they happened intermittently, building up and then dispersing. Kept awake one night worrying, she remembered her mother tucking sachets of vineflower under her pillow for sweet dreams. She found the sachet she’d brought from Fenin. A faint scent come out when she scrunched it. Mika breathed in deep and found herself relaxing at the smell of home and safety. Her sleep was dreamless that night.
As the months went by she settled into a rhythm, the lessons, learning at the hospice and free time with Jon. Her stamina improved until she could keep up with Gavin and the guardsmen began to make approving noises. She discovered she was fast, able to whip through her opponents defences. She started to incorporate Cassai techniques that Gavin hadn’t met before and Gavin found her a fencing instructor to practice with, correctly guessing she would be better with a lighter weapon. As she pointed out smugly, she was going to be a surgeon, not a butcher.
Chapter 11
To her surprise, Rufus invited her to join the other students after lessons. They larked about in the parks, bought pasties and teased the girls. She delighted in finally messing around with those of her own age, a welcome distraction from the constant lessons. Mika kept having to remember she was a boy, not simply in a similar group with her brother. Joining them became a regular fixture and Jon gave her the time with reluctance. She’d see him on occasions hanging around on the street corners and would wave discretely and he’d grin back, pleased to have been noticed.
Rufus came into lessons one afternoon, full of a secret. He kept them waiting, hinting he knew something everyone else didn’t. The tutor left with a smile at the suppressed excitement.
“They’ve caught that cat, didn’t you hear? The one that was killing everything in the countryside between here and Fenin.” Rufus couldn’t keep it in any longer.
The others crowded around, excited. “The King’s Advisor had to help in the end. I heard father talking about it this morning.” Jenna joined in.
Mika wanted to know more, “What cat?”
“They couldn’t catch it...”
“Too clever by half...”
“Outwitted all the hunters…”
“It’s huge I heard...” The comments came thick and fast, admiring the animal.
“I thought you didn’t have big cats here?”
They shrugged, not caring. Rufus, still bursting, told them, “They’re bringing it in today, putting it in with the others. The King’s Advisor’s going to be there.”
The talk swirled around her and ignoring her questions, they plucked at Mika to come in their excitement. It was agreed they would go to the menagerie to watch. She’d not been there before, it cost to get in and was only accessible to the nobility. Rufus blagged them in, using his father’s name. There were many cages, some larger and fuller than others. Mika wanted to stop and look at the exotic animals, she was sucked along with the others. They stopped in front of the largest, a crowd was already there, murmuring excitedly.
Mika felt sick when she recognised the large cats from her country. She’d never seen one in the flesh, only read and heard about them. They were shy of people in their normal environment. Sleek, grey fur, shading to tan. Green eyes, blues eyes, flicking at the crowds, pacing and staring. This cage was complete, enclosed over the top to stop any chance of jumping over. There were a few half hearted attempts at foliage, some rocks for them to lie on. Her heart ached, they looked bored, she could feel it, pulling at her.
A louder muttering ran through the crowd and something red and jagged ran through her brain, pulsing. Mika gasped, trying to stay on her feet, the crowd pressing around her. The area felt too hot, too full of people, she pulled at her collar trying to get the cooler air in. Emotions washed over her that weren’t hers, anger and an indignation of being enclosed. Her skin shivered in sympathy, she wanted to get out but the crowd hemmed her in, elbowing her back.
Soldiers arrived, shouting warnings and pulling a large cart that rocked. Something thumped against the inside, its occupant clearly unhappy. Keepers ran next to it, clearing the way and warning people to keep back. Mika staggered and the red fury turned into a pounding headache. The noise of the crowd seemed to switch off as they pushed the wooden box up to the cage. She watched in silence, seeing the other cats turn to stare, fur bristling. The feelings intensified as their lips drew back and eyes slitted in anticipation of an intruder.
The keepers slid the door of the box up, the same with the cage door. An excited murmur from the crowd which hushed as they waited. Nothing happened. The keepers poked a stick in through the back end and a cat sprung out. Mika caught her breath, it was beautiful. The sun shone on its fur, the muscles rippled, its ears were back and its face set into a mask of hatred. It was lithe and muscular, a jungle cat, there to hide and stalk through the forests… she felt dizzy with the emotions pushing through. Its movements screamed at her, it shouldn’t be here, not for people to stare at.
A cat sprang at the intruder and taken by surprise it jumped a clear ten feet away with ease. Another stalked from the other side. There were yells of encouragement from the audience. Through her headache she could do nothing but watch the crowd in its bloodlust. Even her friends were shouting, caught up in the excitement. Swipes of red bloomed on grey sides…
A yell and the crowd parted reluctantly. Her attention was dragged away from the cage. A tall man was arguing at the keepers. A ripple of conversation as people noticed. His back was to her as he gestured to be let in. She flinched as a blow from an unsheathed paw landed and felt rather than heard the squeal. The keepers were refusing, the soldiers shrugged, if he wanted to go in… A fist flashed and the crowd were delighted as a keeper went down. The man shouldered the box aside, ducked through the cage door and pulled it shut behind him. The cats continued to stalk their new companion, too busy to notice another intruder.
The man strode up and grabbed a cat by the scruff of its neck as it prepared to spring, knocking it to one side. It turned to snarl, then cowered. A numbness spread across her mind and she began to focus more. The other cats noticed the man and slowly backed away. He was left facing the newcomer.
Mika was aware of Rufus talking excitedly in the background about the King’s Advisor. She ignored him, staring as the man walked up to the new cat. It snarled and crouched, tamping its hind legs down. His stance showed no fear as the cat twisted itself in readiness to spring. All sinuous curves and lashing tail, its claws unsheathed. A jagged line of pain ratcheted across her brain and it was met by a mental buffet so hard she staggered. Lissina turned to make an excited comment. Her eyes were shining, not noticing Mika’s distress. Mika barely noticed the cat staggering through the ache in her skull. She concentrated on standing straight, trying not to vomit.
Roles reversed, the cat backed off, wanting to gain distance from the man that stalked it. Both ignored the shouting crowd and the other occupants of the cage. The intensity of its gaze, muscles rolling smoothly under the fur, it leapt. Another blow in her mind and Mika’s cry of pain was lost in the shout of the audience. The man moved, shifting as the cat twisted in the air trying to reach and failed. It stumbled inelegantly, the blows raining down against Mika’s mind, jarring her and the man moved again. Grabbing the cat by the scruff of its neck, he pulled its jaw up to stare into its eyes. The crowd fell silent. Nothing moved in the cage. Mika felt sick, barely standing, ignored, waves of nausea passing through her. Limply she let them, allowed it to wash through, over and past her.
She gazed through exhausted eyes as the cat slowly rolled to the ground giving way, its tail thumping and ears bent back. The sickness passed. A long pause, then the man stood and clicked his fingers. Mika could feel the tightening of the noose around the cat. It slunk to its feet and the crowd gasped as it pressed close to the side of his leg. He briefly ran his fingers through the soft thick fur over its neck then walked to the door of the cage, the cat padding beside him.
Mika stared as the man turned and had her second surprise of the day. She’d expected the flat faced features of Ackbarr. He was Cassai, tall and long limbed. After a short argument, the door was opened and the crowd shrank back. He eyed the mass of people, arrogant in victory until his eyes caught her hair. A flicker of shock between them as his eyes pinned hers, then he ignored her to walk away, the cat following at his heels.
Mika sagged, Lissina was looking at her strangely and she did her best to pull herself upright. She’d been sweating all through the encounter. “Who was that?”
Tabat sniggered, “That was Jace, the King’s Advisor for War.” He puffed himself up and walked in imitation as the crowd dispersed. The others laughed.
“He’s Cassai. I thought they weren’t allowed positions of power in Ackbarr.”
“He’s not Cassai or at least not full blooded, he can’t be, just look at his hair. He’s not even as blond as you and you’re only half. My father says he’s too damn good at fighting to be left hanging around. Someone else would snap him up otherwise.” Rufus was full of his father’s knowledge as they began to walk back.
He was Cassai and what’s more she knew, unlike those boys, that Jace must be closely related to the Cassai royalty. His features were similar to her mother’s, the hair exactly the same shade. Those eyes, the power in them, she shivered.
The boys sniggered about Jace, “There are rumours about what he does with those cats, have you heard?” Delighted to be informing a new pair of ears, they chose the crudest possible terms, leaving nothing to her imagination.
It finished with Tabat saying, “Licks his balls clean after fucking, twists around, just like a cat.” She was forced to laugh with them, despite her tight head. The boys pushed and shoved one another, laughing and making rude cat sounds. Lissina’s face was thoughtful, Mika asked her what it was.
Lissina shrugged, “I think he’s interesting, just look at what he did with that cat. You two look quite similar, did you know that?”
Mika’s answer that most Cassai looked like her was lost under the boys hooting. They teased Mika to be careful of Lissina all their way home, su
ggesting ways to “tame the pussy”, in all its possible connotations.
She slept badly that night. Her dreams were full of the memories of the cat and the man. His mocking eyes coming closer, the jolts of power twisting her body, forcing her to do his bidding. She whimpered as she felt her body want to stretch and without knowing why, fought it. Halfway through the night she got up and found her mother’s sachet of vineflowers. Pressing it against her nose, she thought of her mother and calmed, sleeping like the dead for the rest of the night.
Cranky and tired, she stumbled down in the morning. Orai, grinning, sent her up to Belindros’ room, having assured her that she was wanted. Without thinking she went. To her surprise the door opened. Belindros stood in the middle of his room, his arms wrapped around a plump middle aged woman. Mika blinked and couldn’t help staring.
“Piss off Mikon. Haven’t you ever seen a pair of tits before?”
The older woman turned her head away. Sure that she was laughing at her face, Mika flushed and shut the door quietly. She’d had enough of her trainee, she scowled and decided she was going to get rid of him.
Mika stalked downstairs, grabbing a willow switch from a basket near the fire. Orai looked up, smirking as she came in, positive she wouldn’t do anything. She composed her face and walked past. He sniggered and then yelped as she whipped the switch across his back.
“You know I’m allowed to beat you black and blue don’t you?” Orai went pale, she’d never lost her temper. “Get out,” she said quietly.
He scrambled off the bench, the others studiously ignoring them. She flicked the switch over his backside and he ran for the courtyard. White faced, Orai tried to wriggle away and she had to get him in an armlock to keep him in one place. All her frustration over his behaviour and the sleepless night came out at once as she raised her switch. He whimpered and she caught sight of his face. Petron’s image came into her mind and she shut her eyes, trying to block out how she’d feel about someone doing the same to him.
