He lifted his hand and released the mother-of-pearl clip that secured her chignon so that her hair fell like a curtain of gold silk around her shoulders. ‘It would make sense for us to get married as soon as possible. What kind of wedding would you like?’
Taken aback by his cool, almost indifferent tone, Kristen shrugged helplessly. ‘Nothing fancy. After all, we’re not marrying for conventional reasons so it would be silly to go to a lot of fuss. Maybe we could just slip off to a register office.’
Sergio’s brows rose. ‘Can you clarify what you mean by “conventional reasons”?’
‘Well, it’s not as though we are in love with each other like most couples are when they decide to marry...is it?’ she said huskily. ‘It’s just a sensible arrangement.’
‘Indeed it is,’ Sergio agreed pleasantly. His eyes were hooded, but Kristen sensed that for some inexplicable reason, he was angry with her. ‘So, following on the sensible theme, I assume you hope to fall pregnant quickly so that Nico can have a little playmate?’
She bit her lip. ‘Well...yes.’
‘In that case, we’d better have sex.’
Kristen caught her breath as he swung her round and briskly ran the zip of her dress down her spine. With no straps to hold it up, the taffeta gown slithered to the floor and for some silly reason she was tempted to cover her breasts with her hands when he spun her back to face him. She couldn’t explain why she felt so vulnerable. He was the same man who had made love to her with tender passion these past weeks, yet tonight his smile did not reach his eyes and his calculating expression chilled her.
‘You had better get into bed—unless you want me to take you here on the carpet?’
‘Sergio...?’ She couldn’t disguise the tremor in her voice but, before she could ask him why he was acting this way, his head swooped and he slanted his mouth over hers, kissing her with searing passion that lit a flame inside her so that she wound her arms around his neck as he lifted her and carried her over to the bed. He placed her on the silk bedspread and she watched dry-mouthed while he stripped down to his underwear. His boxers followed his trousers to the floor and, as usual, the sight of his jutting arousal turned her insides to marshmallow. But, instead of stretching out next to her and taking her in his arms as she hoped he would do, he tugged her knickers off and pushed her legs apart.
Anticipation licked through her as he cupped her breasts and rolled her nipples between his fingers until they hardened and tingled. She was on fire for him, but the faintly speculative expression in his eyes disturbed her.
‘Sergio, is something wrong?’
‘What could possibly be wrong, cara?’ he drawled. ‘We’ve both got what we want, especially if you conceive a child tonight.’
If all she wanted was a stud, that was what she would get, Sergio thought grimly. He didn’t want to admit that she had hurt more than his pride. His heart was hurting, and that made him angry because he didn’t want to feel vulnerable. He didn’t want to feel anything, certainly not this hollow ache of loneliness.
He slid his hands beneath her bottom, tilted her hips and unhesitatingly drove his hard shaft into her. Kristen had been fantasising about him making love to her all evening and her body was eager and receptive. But Sergio stilled. ‘Did I hurt you?’ He cursed roughly. ‘I should have taken more care.’
He began to withdraw, but Kristen wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back down. ‘You didn’t hurt me.’ Casting aside her pride, she whispered, ‘Make love to me, Sergio, please...’
Her husky plea breached Sergio’s defences and, with a low groan, he thrust into her and felt the sweet embrace of her body as her vaginal muscles tightened around him. Something was happening to him. He no longer felt in control of himself, but after a lifetime of controlling his emotions he was afraid to let go. Instead he concentrated on giving Kristen physical pleasure. He knew how to please her, knew every secret of her body, and he made love to her with all his skill while he desperately tried to keep his mind, his soul detached from her.
Kristen sensed that something was different. There was no tenderness in the way Sergio made love to her, but her body did not care and simply responded to his mastery so that too soon she felt the first spasms of her orgasm and she gave a soft cry as indescribable pleasure overwhelmed her and enslaved her in its sensual embrace.
Sergio must have been deliberately pacing himself until he felt her come and before the ripples of her climax had faded he gave a powerful thrust and spilled his seed into her, but his harsh groan seemed to have been torn from his throat and almost immediately he rolled off her.
She lay beside him, stunned by the swift, almost emotionless coupling they had just shared. She didn’t know what to say to him, especially when he murmured, ‘I hope I satisfied you, cara?’ The endearment sounded faintly mocking and her hurt turned to anger. She wanted to demand what the hell was wrong with him, but he had already got up from the bed and was pulling on his trousers and his grim expression warned her that a confrontation between them now would be explosive.
‘I need to read through some paperwork in connection with the phone call I took earlier. I’ll go downstairs to my study and leave you to get some sleep.’ He hesitated, and for a second she glimpsed a look of pain in his eyes that tugged on her heart. But he blinked, and she wondered if she had imagined it as he said in a curiously husky voice, ‘It was a tiring day.’
It had been a perfect day that had been ruined by Sergio’s sudden change of mood. Hours later, Kristen was still awake, trying to understand what had gone wrong that had turned him into a cold stranger. Maybe he had changed his mind and no longer wanted to marry her? But he wanted Nico, and so had decided he would have to go through with a wedding to gain custody of his son.
She had promised herself she would not cry, but alone in the bed they usually shared she couldn’t hold back her tears. When Sergio stood beside the bed a little before dawn and watched her while she slept, the sight of her tear-streaked face made his gut twist. He reached down and touched her hair. He longed to slide between the sheets and draw her into his arms, but he couldn’t tonight after the cold way he had made love to her. It was not her fault that she did not love him. Dio, his own mother had not loved him, so why should anyone else? he thought despairingly. He despised himself for upsetting Kristen tonight. She had been right to be wary of him and he couldn’t blame her if tomorrow she told him she had changed her mind about marrying him.
His throat ached, and he dashed his hand across his eyes. Big boys don’t cry, he reminded himself derisively. He had learned that lesson when he had been only a few years older than Nico, but as he stumbled into the sitting room and sank down onto a chair his shoulders shook with the storm force of his emotions.
* * *
Sergio wasn’t lying next to her in bed when Kristen woke up. She hadn’t really expected him to be, but the sight of the empty space on the pillow instead of his silky, sleep-rumpled hair intensified the empty feeling inside her. Fortunately Nico hurtled into the room like a small tornado and, by focusing on getting him washed and dressed and ready for breakfast, she was able to put her misery in a box, to be dealt with later. It was something she’d had plenty of practice doing after she had left Sicily four years ago, she thought ruefully. But this time around running away wasn’t an option. She had to put Nico’s best interests first, and that undoubtedly meant remaining at Casa Camelia.
When she went downstairs the butler informed her that Sergio had gone to Rome and would not be back until late that evening. Kristen knew that the Castellano Group’s head office was located in the capital city. She understood that Sergio held an important position in the company but, while she could cope with her own disappointment that he would be away all day, it was not fair on Nico. Her old fear that he would become bored of fatherhood and return to his old workaholic ways was still on her mind that aft
ernoon when she took Nico up to La Casa Bianca to visit his grandfather.
Tito was in the garden, resting beneath the shade of a pergola. Age and poor health had etched deep lines on his face, but his eyes lit up as he watched Nico kicking a football across the lawn.
‘My grandson is a fine boy and a true Castellano. He reminds me of his father when he was a child.’ His voice became husky. ‘But I do not have many memories of Sergio. He was very young when my wife took him away, and when I saw him again he was almost a man.’
Kristen bit her lip, startled by the emotion she had heard in Tito’s voice. ‘Did you miss him during the ten years that he was living in America?’
‘With all my heart.’ Tito sighed deeply. ‘I desperately wanted to bring him home to Sicily, but his mother told me that he was happy living with her and didn’t want to come back to me. I feared that Patti had poisoned his mind against me. But what could I do? If I had snatched him back he might have hated being here, and hated me. And so I waited and hoped that one day he would return. But every time I looked at his twin brother it was a painful reminder that I had two sons, and when Sergio did finally come home there was a distance between us that I have never been able to breach.’
‘Have you ever told him what you have just told me?’ Kristen said in a choked voice. ‘Because, if not, I think you should as soon as possible. Sergio’s childhood growing up with his mother was...difficult,’ she said carefully, not sure how much Tito knew about the abuse Sergio had suffered as a little boy. ‘He believes that you didn’t love him, and that was why you didn’t try to regain custody of him.’ She stared at the elderly man, her eyes bright with tears. ‘Please talk to him and let him know that you did—and do—care about him. It...it could make all the difference to how he feels about himself.’
Tito nodded slowly. ‘Castellano men are not good at showing their emotions.’ He darted a keen glance at her. ‘But perhaps you have discovered this?’ He sighed again. ‘I am old, and I would like to set the record straight with my son while I still have time.’
‘Thank you,’ Kristen whispered fervently.
‘You love him, don’t you?’ Tito smiled gently at her startled expression. ‘I saw your love for him in your eyes the first day when you introduced me to my grandson. And I also saw that Sergio loves you.’
Kristen’s heart jolted beneath her ribs. She was tempted to tell Tito he was mistaken, but what was the point in shattering an old man’s dreams? Instead, she called to Nico, who had kicked his football into a flower bed. ‘I think I had better take your grandson home before he completely wrecks the garden,’ she said to Tito. She hesitated, hoping he would keep his promise to share his feelings with Sergio. ‘Remember what I told you.’
His tired eyes suddenly twinkled. ‘And you remember what I told you, my dear.’
CHAPTER TWELVE
KRISTEN WAS LOST in her thoughts as she walked down the front steps of La Casa Bianca and almost collided with a tall, dark figure. For a split second she thought it was Sergio and her pulse quickened, but it slowed again when she saw it was Salvatore.
‘Your disappointed expression is not good for my ego,’ he teased in the faintly sardonic tone Kristen had come to expect from him. There was an air of remoteness about Sergio’s twin brother that she had initially found off-putting. But as she had got to know Salvatore a little better over the past weeks she sensed that he was haunted by the accident three years ago in which his wife had died, and she recognised the same loneliness in him that she sensed in Sergio.
‘You took me by surprise. Sergio has gone to Rome for the day,’ she said, unaware of the wistful note in her voice.
Salvatore nodded. ‘The company’s Chief Financial Officer, who is an old family friend, has suffered a suspected heart attack and Sergio has gone to the hospital.’ His eyes narrowed on Kristen’s pale face. ‘I understand that congratulations are in order. My brother told me that the two of you have decided to get married. I expect you are busy planning the wedding?’
Kristen gave a listless shrug. ‘It will only be a small event. After all, it is Sergio’s second wedding.’ The demon jealousy inside her prompted her to ask, ‘Was his wedding to Annamaria an extravagant affair?’
Salvatore looked puzzled. ‘Certainly a great event was planned, and Annamaria was thoroughly involved in the preparations. But by the time of the wedding...’ He broke off and gave Kristen an intent look. ‘I assumed Sergio had told you about Annamaria.’
‘He tried,’ Kristen admitted. ‘But I didn’t want to talk about her.’ She flushed beneath Salvatore’s speculative gaze.
‘Take my advice and ask him about her,’ he said in an unexpectedly gentle voice that played havoc with Kristen’s already raw emotions. The sound of a helicopter overhead caused them both to look towards the sky. ‘Sergio is back earlier than expected.’ He glanced over to where Nico was playing on the front lawn with Rosa. ‘The children are having fun together. Let me take Nico back to the castle so that they can carry on with their game. It will leave you free to have a conversation with my brother, who, by the way, is a damned idiot,’ Salvatore muttered. ‘I would very much like you to be my sister-in-law, Kristen, and I am looking forward to the wedding.’
* * *
The memory of how Sergio had made love to her with such cold detachment the previous night made Kristen feel reluctant to face him and, instead of heading straight back to the villa, she took the path that circled the lake and watched two white swans drifting gracefully on the water. She had read somewhere that swans mated for life. Presumably their lives were less complicated than humans’—but perhaps she was making things complicated when actually the situation was very simple. She sighed. The truth was she loved Sergio and she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. So why hadn’t she told him? If only she had been honest about her feelings for him four years ago; Nico might have grown up with his father from birth. But back then she had been too unsure of herself to fight for what she wanted. Was she going to make the same mistake again? Kristen asked herself impatiently. She didn’t have to think about the answer, and she half ran back to Casa Camelia.
* * *
The helicopter was on the helipad at the front of the house but there was no sign of Sergio. She raced through the front door and up the stairs, but when she burst into their bedroom she stopped dead when she saw him sitting on the end of the bed. His shoulders were hunched and he was holding his head in his hands, but he lowered them when he heard her and jerked his eyes to her face.
‘Where the hell have you been?’ he demanded hoarsely. ‘You left my father’s house nearly an hour ago. I thought...’ He swallowed convulsively and, to Kristen’s shock, he dashed his hand across his eyes—but not before she had seen the betraying glimmer of moisture on his lashes.
‘What did you think?’ she asked faintly.
‘That you had gone. That I had driven you away.’
Understanding dawned. ‘Salvatore took Nico to the castle to play with Rosa. There was no need for you to worry. I wouldn’t take Nico away from you,’ she told him urgently.
‘I wasn’t worried about that. I was scared that I had lost you.’ Sergio stood up and, as he walked towards her, Kristen was shaken by the terrible bleakness in his eyes.
‘Would you care if you had lost me?’
‘Dio, how can you ask that?’ His voice shook. ‘Of course I would care.’ He raked a hand through his hair. ‘Perhaps these will explain better than words.’
Only then did Kristen notice the exquisite bouquet of red roses on her dressing table. What on earth? She bit her lip as Sergio handed the bouquet to her. The sensual fragrance of the roses filled her senses and her fingers trembled as she stroked the velvet-soft petals. There was a note attached to the bouquet. She ripped it open and stared at Sergio’s distinctive bold handwriting:
‘Can you
ever forgive me?’
He had written one short line, yet she sensed powerful emotion behind the words and it was as if a fog around her brain had suddenly cleared.
What was he asking her to forgive him for? Her throat ached with tears. For finding it hard to show his feelings, or for hiding his emotions, as he had learned to do when he was a child and his mother had beaten him? Dear heaven, she had been so selfish to hide how she felt about him while she waited for him to tell her that he loved her. Maybe he didn’t, but he cared about her enough to buy her roses.
‘When I arrived home I came to find you to give you the flowers,’ he said in a curiously strained voice, ‘but one of the staff told me you were visiting my father.’
‘I saw the helicopter. Salvatore told me you had gone to the hospital in Rome to visit a friend, but you are back earlier than expected.’
‘Fortunately, Gilberto’s health scare turned out not to be a heart attack.’
Kristen breathed in the roses’ rich perfume. ‘These are beautiful. Thank you.’
‘Can you forgive me for the way I behaved last night, Krissie?’
This was a Sergio she did not recognise. A man clearly wracked with emotion. But what did it mean? What had he meant when he had said he had been afraid he had lost her?
‘Sergio...you once offered to tell me about your first marriage.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Will you tell me about Annamaria now?’
He frowned, clearly surprised by her request.
‘I was desperately hurt when I discovered that you had married so soon after I left Sicily,’ Kristen confessed.
‘You don’t have to remind me that I failed you badly four years ago,’ he said harshly. ‘It’s pathetic, I know, but the truth is I couldn’t face up to how I felt about you. It was easier to keep my emotions locked away. I missed you like hell when you left me, but then I heard the news about Annamaria and she became the focus of my attention.
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