by Keri Lake
As we near the perimeter, a woman with short cropped hair and a far healthier build than mine swings her attention toward us. The frown on her face leads me to question whether she’s unfriendly, or surprised to see two young girls wandering about the desert.
Instead of going toward the camp, the man leads us in a different direction, away from the cluster of tents and people.
“Where are you taking us?”
“To get you fed.”
My mind wraps itself around his words, and I look back toward the camp as we enter a small cave in the adjacent mountain. “We don’t need food. We just need some sleep.”
“You’ll get plenty of sleep. Trust me.”
When the man from the back snorts, I’m certain something isn’t right. My fears are confirmed when we come to a stop deep inside the cavern where the light doesn’t reach. Hairs on the back of my neck stand upright, and I feel Bryani’s hand slip into mine.
A flame comes to life, just in time for me to see a large object barreling toward us. Muscles stiff, I can’t move as the animal bounds at the two of us, and a gasp slips past my lips. It’s the largest cat I’ve ever seen.
It stops just short and lashes out a paw that grazes across my arm. Hand slapped to my wrist, I back up a step and find the animal is tethered to a thick chain. “What is this? I thought you brought us here for food?” An incessant tremble wracks my muscles, while my heart feels as if a stampede moves through my chest.
“I did. I brought you here for food … for the cat. ‘S’what we do with kids we find out in the Deadlands.”
Beefy laughs from behind, only stoking my anger of having been betrayed.
Cold tendrils curl around the back of my neck, and I mentally calculate how quickly the two of them would catch us if we dashed past Beefy.
A hard push from behind knocks me forward, and the cat lunges again. I fall to the ground and kick backward, hitting my sister’s legs, while the laughter of both men echoes through the cavern.
“What are you assholes doing?” The feminine voice snaps my attention toward the woman from the camp, standing behind Beefy.
“Feeding the cat,” Baldy says and snorts. “What’s it look like?”
“I’m pretty sure you know the rules about finding children.”
“C’mon. Just one of them? The big one.” The bald jerk points to me. “She’s feistier than the other one. I’d love to see her torn to pieces.”
I offer him a glare and swing my attention back to see the woman has pulled a gun. “Don’t make me shoot you, Kemper. You know I will.”
“I’m just playing, Dina. ‘Fucks sake, learn how to take a joke.” He reaches down for me, but I don’t reach back. Instead I slap his hand away, frowning, as I push to my feet. “You see? Feisty.”
“Good,” Dina volleys back. “Maybe if we’re lucky, she’ll cut your nutsack off while you’re sleeping, and we’ll all get to watch the cat tear it to pieces.”
Hand covering his crotch, he grimaces. “You’re a sick woman.”
“And you’re a dead man, if you go near these girls again.” Her gaze falls on me, and she jerks her head for us to follow her.
Flashing Baldy another glare, I catch the twitch of his eyes and the curl of his lip, as Dina leads us out of the cave. I like this woman. In some ways, she reminds me of my mother. Strong and unyielding.
An ache blossoms in my chest at the thought of her, and I tamp it down to stay focused.
Eyes trail our steps as we follow Dina into the small camp, where the savory scent of cooked meat waters my mouth. She guides us to two large boulders set beside a campfire, where some torched animal spins on a spit. “You must be starving.”
I try not to look too eager when I nod, but I can’t take my eyes off the meat.
Tearing pieces from the animal, Dina piles the meat onto a thornless cactus pad and hands it to my sister. She gathers more on a separate pad for me. “I’m giving you my rations for tonight. I’ve eaten plenty today. Enjoy it.”
Lowering my gaze, I can’t even look her in the eye, the shame of hunger overpowering my will to politely decline. “Thank you. We’re grateful.”
Warm, greasy meat fills my belly, as I shove the food into my mouth, licking the smoky flavor from my fingers. The others in the camp keep their distance, but I’ve caught the stares from a couple of younger men. Maybe in their twenties. Dina appears to be one of only a half dozen females in a ratio of one to about four. A few small children scamper about, eyeing Bryani, but it’s the men I’m worried about.
As if she senses it, Dina looks up toward the one male across the camp, who watches us as he sits sipping out of a flask.
“Don’t worry about them. I promise no one will touch you. They’re just curious, is all. Don’t see young girls roaming about very often. Where’d you come from?”
Its not fair to keep anything from her, given she offered up her ration of food. I can’t even imagine such a thing, as starving as I was when we first sat down. The prickly pears offered some relief, but there’s nothing quite like meat to sate real hunger. “Our hive … it was raided by Ragers.”
She rolls her shoulders back, looking suspicious, and I shake my head.
“We didn’t get bit. We got out ahead of them.”
“Horde, was it?”
Nodding, I shove another thread of meat into my mouth and lick the grease from my fingers. “They got our mother.”
“Sorry to hear that. So, you two …. You’re all alone out here?”
A glance at Bryani shows her licking the cactus pad for the last bits of meat, and I offer her one of two pieces left on my plate. “Yeah. Just Bryani, my sister, and me.”
“What’s your name, kid?”
“Calithea.”
“Pretty.” Her eyes seem to appraise me for a moment, before lifting back to my gaze. “You two virgins?”
The question hits me off guard, twisting my stomach with discomfort. Looking around to make sure no one is in earshot, I hesitate to answer her. I know the word, one thrown around by the boys in our hive, and by my mother. She always told us the fact that we never lay with a man makes us more at risk out in the Deadlands.
“You don’t have to answer. Just strange to see two girls who haven’t been swiped up already. Seems someone would’ve gotten to you by now.” Maybe she thinks marauders are after us. Or worse, Legion. I’ve heard about the soldiers who raid hives, raping and murdering the women, and stealing the men away.
“No one’s touched us. At all. We’re virgins.”
A flicker of a frown or intrigue dances across her face, it’s hard to discern between the two. “Interesting.” She gives a sly glance around and picks two more pieces of meat from the animal, handing it to each of us. “C’mon, you must be exhausted. I’ll show you where you can sleep tonight.”
“I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but we were hoping we could join your hive.”
“That’s not my decision. We’ve got resources and food rationed for our group’s size.”
“I know how to cook. And Bryani knows how to read and sew. We could be useful.”
She exhales a sigh and looks around. “How ‘bout you get some sleep, and I’ll pop the question tomorrow in a meeting with everyone. See what they think.”
Sounds better than roaming the desert all night with Ragers on our trail. “Okay.”
Dina leads us to a tent that appears to be lived in, going off the crinkled blankets and personal items thrown about. “Sorry ‘bout the mess. Wasn’t expecting any visitors.”
The tent is only big enough for Bryani and me, unless we pack in tight together.
“Remember Asshole from the cave? We’re sorta together.” The disappointment on her face suggests maybe it’s not entirely by choice. “I’ll sleep in his tent tonight. You two can sleep in mine.”
For a split second, I wonder if the two of them have been together like that in here, on these blankets, but then I remember the scorpion that scampered across my leg t
wo nights ago while camped out under the stars. I’ll take these blankets over that any day. “Thank you for everything, Dina.”
“You’re welcome, kid.”
Chapter 6
Present day
* * *
Small, blue, green and silver beads slide over my arm, as I spin the bracelet Bryani made for me. Took a lot of crap for it from the other girls at first, since jewelry isn’t allowed, but Medusa gave me the okay, and, eventually, the others forgot about it. Medusa has her moments, I guess, but I wouldn’t call the woman nice by any stretch. After all, I’ve seen her beat a girl to death for mouthing back.
The thin mattress of my bunk hardly dips, as Roz sits down beside me. Second floor of A Wing is made up of about thirty hospital-sized rooms, and each room somehow manages to fit a dozen bunks, which means there’s no such thing as alone time, or privacy. I’ve been lucky to bunk with Roz since my first year, seeing how frequently girls come and go. She’s a year older than I am and works transport, wheeling subjects from one place to the next, so she sees and hears a lot. Unlike mine, her head is shaved down to a buzz of black that’ll be shaved again in another week. Females in Alpha Project are permitted to forego the shavings. Probably to give the beastly males something to pull when they’re dragging them around their cells. If not for the fact that most of the girls would sooner work the incinerators than be sent off to Alpha Project, I’m certain my long hair would be a source of contention.
“How’d it go?” she asks, tugging a cigarette from the pocket of her uniform. We’re not supposed to smoke, at all, in here, but Roz has something going with one of the engineers, Kenny, who gives her cigarettes in exchange for favors. He basically knows the ins and outs of the computer system throughout the hospital. As much as I’m inclined to warn her off from him, I find their relationship valuable, and in this place, valuable relationships are what keep a person alive.
“Horrible.” Tucking an arm under my head, I sigh. “He hates me.”
Her eye squints as she draws in a lungful of smoke. It’s odd that Medusa doesn’t smell it when she comes in for bed check. Maybe she can’t smell anything. Maybe her nose is as stoney as her heart. “I worried about you all fucking day. Thought I was going to have to suffer a new bunkbitch.”
“Thanks for the confidence. I’m glad to know our friendship means so much.”
A shove to my legs, and she smiles. “Just messing with you.” Twisting around, she folds her legs, forcing mine to the corner of my bed. “’S he huge?”
“I don’t know what they’re feeding them, but he’s the biggest male I’ve seen here.”
Used to be women weren’t permitted at Calico. During the raids on hives, women were seen as useless, breeders of the diseased, and killed off. Now, they’re brought here as subjects, to study third generation breeding in controlled experiments.
The fear was, the presence of females would tempt not only the guards, but the beastly males used in experiments, like Valdys. Funny how it’s evolved into something to study, like everything else here. Starvation. Sleep deprivation. Reactions to hot, cold, pain, and pleasure. Everything is tested and observed, and I have no doubt those muscles are the results of experimentation, too.
Eyes wide, she bites her lip and flicks her ash into the palm of her hand. “You see his dick?”
With a grimace, I cross my arms. “No! It was just a meeting.”
“I had to wheel Neela to surgery after she was with one of the Alphas first day. From the sound of it? He nearly tore her in half.”
I remember Neela, now, from my first year. Didn’t have the greatest start with her, but we eventually grew on each other, and became friends, even. Until she was dragged off for Alpha Project, and I never saw her again after that.
That could’ve easily been me, sent to that Alpha’s room.
“Yeah, thanks for telling me that beforehand, by the way. Might’ve been useful to know what happens when you say their name.”
“That’s why he went at her like that?”
Apparently, Roz doesn’t know everything that goes on in this place. “Yeah. I made the same mistake today.”
“And? What’d he do to you?”
“Nothing like that.”
“Nothing?” She shrugs and shakes her head. “Well, that’s intriguing, don’t you think?”
“There’s nothing intriguing about the Alphas. Mine almost killed me. Strangled me against the wall.”
“Shit, Cali. I’m sorry.” She’s the only one who calls me by my real name here, otherwise we refer to each other by the last three numbers tattooed on the back of our necks. “Let me see.”
Lifting my chin up high, I let her take a look at the bruised band around my throat that’s still tender to the touch.
“Jesus.” Her lips curl, as she drags the tip of her finger over what’s probably a black and purple mess now. Not that she hasn’t seen worse, even on me. Roz has sometimes been the one to wheel me back to my room after my weekly checkups. All I know is, when I’m taken to one of the experimental suites, there’s a few seconds of excruciating pain, and I wake up in recovery afterward. According to her, it’s never pretty when she first retrieves me. “He could’ve snapped your neck, by the looks of it.”
“Felt like he wanted to.” Rubbing my hand over the sensitive flesh, I lower my chin. “I have to make him … like me.” If Medusa, or Doctor Ericsson, heard me discussing the experiment, I’m certain I’d be looking at solitary or “treatment”, which is what they call thermo, or electro, therapy for bad behavior. “I don’t even know how they think I’m going to accomplish that.”
“Touch his cock.”
Frowning, I shake my head. “Can you not be obsessed with the male genitalia for once? This is serious.”
“So am I. You’d be surprised what one little stroke can do. Take Kenny. Guy wouldn’t even look at me for months. Then one day? I transported a No Pulse down to the incinerators.” No Pulse is how those in transport refer to the late stage infected after dissection. “He was standing behind me, and I accidentally brushed up against his dick. Next day? We were making out under the staircase.”
Eyes closing, I blow out an exasperated breath. “I’m not touching his cock. I doubt he’d let me near it, anyway.”
“What I’ve heard, you could probably stand a foot away and brush it.”
“Where the hell do you hear these things?”
Her cheeks cave with another drag of her cigarette. “Shit gets around.”
“Lights out!” Medusa’s voice thunders from the doorway, and eyes popping wide, Roz bends forward, stamping her cigarette out under the bed, before she scrambles up to her top bunk. I catch her licking the ash from her palm, as she climbs the ladder, and I shiver at what that must taste like, if the smell is anything to go by.
The stout guard makes her rounds to each bunk, inspecting every bed for any sign of foul play, which includes hiding food, and in some rare cases, boys from B wing. It’s only happened once where I was assigned, and as far as we know, that boy is dead.
When she finally reaches my and Roz’s bunk, her head raises, eyes scanning over Roz, and then me. Mine is nothing but a cursory glance, as I’ve not broken a rule in a couple years now.
None that she’s been privy to, anyway.
I work in the kitchen during times when I’m not laid out on a gurney, and I did, on occasion, smuggle food back for the others, which resulted in losing my rations for nearly a week, and some solitary. A week through which I still had to serve my fellow subjects, while starving. That day, I lost privileges to see Bryani, since she nearly died trying to defend me, and my hope is to earn those privileges back. I don’t remember much of it, since I blacked out during the interrogation, and I haven’t smuggled anything out of the kitchen since then.
The lights cut out.
There is no place in the desert as black as this room when the lights go out. I can’t even see past my own nose, so when Roz hits the top of my bunk and whispers a sou
nd to get my attention, I don’t even know where to look. “Give me your fingers. Index and middle.”
“Why?”
“Just do it.”
Huffing, I hold up my fingers around the edge of the bed, as she requests, and wait until she taps hers along them in the dark. Her hand curls around my fingers, and she slides her palm up and down. “Feel that?”
“Yeah? So?”
“That’s how you stroke a dick.”
“What the hell are you two doing?” Seven-one-one whispers from the bunk beside us, Shoshanna’s her real name—she’s been here just over three years and works in the cleaning crew. Nice girl, but nosey as hell.
“Mind your own fucking business,” Roz snaps, and keeps on with her stroking.
I don’t know why I let her. Maybe this is how she feels useful to me for all the times I stuck up for her when she first arrived. That’s what friends do for each other in this place. I wouldn’t be here, if someone hadn’t stuck up for me. “Are you done now?” I ask, trying to sound bored, but my mind is brimming with intrigue. It’s not unusual to see a boy’s penis, especially on the experimental wards. Sometimes, they’ll flash us, if they’re brave enough not to get caught. Sometimes, we see the naked bodies of a No Pulse getting wheeled down to incinerators. In a few cases, the guards have propositioned the girls here, in exchange for favors, like cigarettes, or extra food rations. For whatever reason, though, they tend to stay away from the girls in Alpha Project, like me, which is just fine.
I try not to imagine my hands on Valdys that way, but I can’t help thinking, with a man that size, I’d never wrap my fingers around his girth, even if I tried what she’s suggesting. It’d be impossible.
Dropping my hand, I end her little demonstration and roll over in my bed.
“Did you feel how hard I squeezed? They like that. The harder the better.”
“Doesn’t that hurt?”
“Maybe, but in a good way, I guess. And they love their balls played with, too. And sucked.”
