by Al K. Line
"Bye, and don't worry, they always put them in his briefcase. Why they can't leave the poor fellow alone, I'll never know." With that Intus was gone. No, I wasn't particularly panicked. You get used to it after a while.
"Those imps will be the death of us all one day," moaned Grandma.
"They're just having fun. They won't let things get too out of control. Maybe." I was fairly confident Intus would deal with it, but to be honest I was more concerned that my backup had gone. I had to ask Grandma about the trolls without Intus to soften the questioning I hoped wouldn't turn into an interrogation.
"How about this tea?" Yeah, I bottled it. Maybe I'd ask after I'd relaxed a little.
Naughty Witches
"Grandma, the trolls have gone mad. Apparently they've killed all the zombies and one was loose in the city and Spark found them and fought a troll and... Oh!"
"Hi, Gretchen," I said casually, as the young witch turned almost purple with embarrassment. Grandma stared at her until she wilted like a flower in the desert.
"Oh, er, um... Hi, Spark, didn't know you were here."
"Clearly."
"Out with you, silly girl, you and your daft tales. Can't you see I have a visitor? It's Faz and he doesn't want to be hearing your nonsense."
"Nice try, Grandma. I think we better have a little chat, don't you?" Maybe for the first time in my life Grandma looked genuinely uncomfortable. She was in over her head, and that was a first too. It wasn't like her to get involved in things like this. Could she be involved? Surely not.
Gretchen did what any self-respecting young witch would do and said, "Bye, sorry," and ran away. I heard the front door slam closed behind her along with crying. She would be in serious trouble for such a breach of trust. Poor kid.
"Now, I think you have some explaining to do, Grandma."
"Who, me? Little old Grandma? Gretchen was just telling me what was happening out there in the world, Faz. Sounds scary. Ooh." Grandma moved over to the sink and closed the window above it, the only ventilation in the room. She knew I hated the heat and the steam—not very subtle.
I drained my tea. She makes the best cuppa ever, even better than Madge's. "You are either involved in what is happening, or you are trying to avoid it. Come on, spill it."
"It's nothing to do with me, honest. You know what these witches are like, always messing about with spells and whatnot. I don't know, nothing but trouble sometimes."
"You're a witch. One of the oldest, and I don't believe for a minute that—"
"Of course I know, at least I think I do, but it's not my business. I have lived a long time, Faz, and always prided myself on staying away from trouble." Grandma cast me a look as I was about to interrupt—she most definitely does not stay away from trouble. "I help the people I help, give them what they need, but politics is nothing to do with me."
"So this is political? In what way?"
"I'm sorry, Faz, but I'm not getting involved. Why do you think I haven't told you anything about this? If the other witches want to get themselves into trouble, and deal with you and Rikka, then that is their business. I would never put you in that position with me."
"Thanks, Grandma, I appreciate it, and I know you wouldn't. So they came to you, asking for help?" She nodded. "What is it? To do with the Council, right?" Another nod. "Someone, or some of them, want positions on the Dark Council, is that it?" A nod, but there was more.
"Please don't tell me that Kaisa Hayashi is stirring up trouble, doing all this so she can be Head of the Dark Council. Is she mad?"
"It's not my place to interfere. And I'm guessing. Things are weird right now, Faz. Most witches don't know anything about what is happening, just a few of Kaisa Hayashi's close people, trying to stir up trouble. But they aren't right. Something else is happening."
"You could have warned me. This involves me. Rikka is my boss!" There was more to this though. If it wasn't a mass revolt by the witches, and even Grandma was in the dark, then everything was totally out of whack.
"I know, but I knew you'd find out soon enough. You're a smart boy, you'd figure it out." Grandma has always given me my independence, but this was taking it a little too far. If Kaisa Hayashi was vying to take over the Dark Council, not just Rikka's Ward of Cardiff, but the whole country, it would spell disaster for us all.
She's a cruel, nasty piece of work, and the only reason she is the top witch is because she is feared by the others. Powerful too. Very. The only good thing about her is she usually keeps her trouble to her witches—they infight and bicker like you would not believe.
"What's she been doing?"
"I couldn't tell you even if I knew. You know how it works, Faz. They are my sisters, and you don't betray family."
"I'm family!" I was angry, and I may have banged the table with my fist.
Grandma turned serious, eyes dark. Not a calling of magic, but a specific witch thing, power emanating from her in ways that made me shiver and my skin crawl. "You do not raise your voice in my house to me, ever."
"Sorry. I love you more than life itself, Grandma, and I am sorry. But come on, I am family."
"And that is why I said I would play no part in any of it. I know you are Rikka's enforcer, and I know how dangerous you are, Faz. More dangerous than even you know. I feel sorry for Kaisa Hayashi more than anything. She has always been a foolish woman. But nobody knows what is really going on, just rumors. They have gone quiet up at the farm where she has been spending more and more time lately. All very odd if you ask me, sneaky old witch that she is."
"You know I have to deal with her, right? This can't be allowed to happen. Rikka will go batty when I tell him. He'll want anyone involved wiped from the planet."
"I've known him since he was a little grubby kid, and I know the kind of person he is. He's a nice man, but you don't get to be Head for as long as Rikka without having a hard side too. You don't tell me how this works, I'm the one that tells you." Grandma gave me a hard stare. She seemed genuinely freaked out. Worse. She was guessing, not certain what was happening or how far the Head witch was willing to take whatever she was up to.
"Yeah, he's tough all right. But he's family too, Grandma. He's an old friend, you and him brought me up after... Well, he's family. Taught me everything I know along with you. Family."
"And fair. Strong, but fair, as it should be. I'd hoped the silly woman would come to her senses, but apparently not. Do what you have to do, Faz, but try not to involve the others. Some of them are a bit dippy. Sheep really."
"I'll try, but you know how it goes."
"I do."
"Okay, I have to go. Thanks for the tea, and I'll try to keep this low key." I headed toward the front door for our final goodbye, but Grandma didn't follow me.
"Wait a minute," she called, still in the kitchen. A minute later she came with my shoes. I'd totally forgotten them. The tan winklepickers shone like new. "Here. Stupid though. They're too pointy."
"It's fashion, Grandma." I like to think it is, anyway. "Thank you, I appreciate that."
"I just cleaned your shoes, you daft lump."
I kissed Grandma on the forehead and left with a smile and a nod. She knew what I meant.
Rikka would go apoplectic.
A Witch Hunt
I spent the next hour or so driving around the city and making calls, avoiding anything witch related. Just checking the city was safe and no more roaming zombies had been encountered. Everything was quiet, apart from more and more trolls suddenly getting smart and deciding they could do jobs better than other people.
There were a lot of irate human Hidden and a lot of confused Regulars in stores, offices, even banks. Trolls were still not good at taking no for an answer and simply muscled their way in, oblivious to the fact they hadn't been asked to do whatever job they took it upon themselves to somehow excel at.
Their actions weren't my main concern, though. It was the fact the witches were behind it. More importantly, Kaisa Hayashi, and that it was being done j
ust to wind up Rikka and cause him a headache. What the endgame was I couldn't tell, but it was certainly causing trouble. Something wasn't adding up—the trolls were the tip of the iceberg. Deeper motives than a simple witch power play or disruption were at work. The whole thing stank of misdirection and it was getting seriously out of hand.
After learning bits and pieces, I headed to Rikka's "office." His place of business is a back room in one of his many "Rikka's Fitness Emporiums." He's got loads of them and they bring in the cash like nobody's business, and unlike other leaders of Hidden humans or species, he has his headquarters in a gym. A Hidden gym, for our kind only. Somewhere to stay safe and build the biceps.
It's unconventional to say the least, as almost every other Head has a smart building as their HQ where they do their business with suitable pomp and all that stuff. Rikka isn't like that. Maybe this is why—he bucks convention, keeping everyone on their toes.
Winking at the latest in a very long line of receptionists, I headed to the gym, opened the specially locked door only accessible to our kind, and was immediately immersed in the grunts, groans, shouts, and stink of numerous Hidden species all pumping iron and generally oozing testosterone, not just males either.
The usual array of characters were busy with the bespoke equipment. Dwarves were going up and down the rack of hammers, even the lightest of which I couldn't hope to lift.
Goblins were in their usual ridiculously skintight, and way too skimpy outfits, goading each other into using weights that often left them crippled and with bits dangling. Groups of shifters were in their own areas, ignoring their neighbors. There was a ghost moaning at the crossover station, a gremlin at the miniaturized chin-up bar, and there she was, Plum. Panther shifter, she of the gorgeous and shapely body, wrapped in a skintight black vest and training shorts, squatting with five hundred pounds, so clearly still on her warm up.
Her back was to me, and what a back it is. I had to drag my eyes away before I thought thoughts I now felt guilty about because of Kate.
I'm allowed to look, aren't I? Just not squeeze and physically drool over. At least I think I am. And no, I haven't asked Kate. I'm not that stupid.
Rikka was at his desk as usual. It still felt weird to see him there as he is now. I'd got so used to seeing his old self, fat overflowing, cake constantly being raised to mouth, that I did a double-take when I saw a rather handsome, slender wizard with nice long hair. But he was still looking grumpy, clearly impatient to hear what I had to say. He beckoned me over with an urgent wave. Some things never change.
I glanced once more at Plum, still squatting away in the rack, sent out a mental apology to Kate, and walked across the rubber flooring to my boss. My stomach rumbled—I was used to food at regular intervals now and it was past lunch time. Luckily, the clanging of the weights and the groaning of the goblins masked my rumblings as it isn't exactly the hardcore impression I try to cultivate. No sniggering.
"I hope you've got good news."
"I've got news."
"So it's not good then?" Rikka looked up from a piece of paper, clearly not anything he was pleased to be reading.
"Depends which way you look at it," I said, hedging my bets.
"Just tell me, Spark, I'm not in the mood for games."
"It's the witches."
"I know that, I told you it had to be them."
"Grandma says it's nothing to do with her, but from what she didn't say it's obvious Kaisa Hayashi is behind it somehow. My guess is she's after your position and is using the trolls to send a message to the other Council members. Not just here, but worldwide. To show you aren't keeping control over your local Ward let alone the country as a whole. She's the only one with the ability to make those smart pills the trolls are crunching on."
"Goddammit! I will crush that woman." There's no sexism in the Hidden world, everyone can get crushed equally. We're funny like that. "You have to stop her, Spark. I've already been getting calls, even goons turning up. The Council members are less than happy about this. Wizards and mages are going nuts, moaning about it interfering with things, with their magic. Everyone's heard of it. I'm the goddamn Head of both Councils! I look like I can't cope when I let trolls go around killing other Hidden."
"I'll get it sorted. Don't worry. But something isn't feeling right. There is something else going on, something behind all this. Either way, I'll deal with it."
Rikka looked relieved. He was getting too stressed, almost close to swearing, and he never uses bad language. He was right though, the stupid Council setups he is a part of would be clamoring for his attention and there would be a lot of species that would be rubbing their hands together in glee knowing he would be squirming. "Good, what do you need?"
"Nothing. I'm going home for lunch then I'll be on the case."
"You what! Lunch? At a time like this?"
"Boss, this won't go away in an hour. I don't doubt it's gonna be a long day, and night, so I need food. Plus, I want to see Kate. We haven't really been apart from each other much of late, and I want to check she is all right."
"You could always call her. Oh, never mind. Go have your lunch and check on her, but don't let me down, Spark." Rikka warned.
"Have I ever?"
"Damn witches, what's wrong with them?"
"My guess is that they are rather annoyed they still have no seats on the Dark Council. You have to move with the times."
"Spark, I am all for women being on our human Council, but tell that to the other Heads. They're like antiquated dinosaurs."
"Hmm." I said nothing, but that was a little rich coming from a man who thought computers were a fad. "Okay, catch you later."
"And, Spark?" I turned, I don't know why, but every time I'm in the gym he does the same thing. Guess he likes the drama. "Try not to fight any more trolls. The zombie enclave will cost a fortune to repair."
"So bill the trolls, or get your accountant to use it as a tax write-off." I smiled then got out of there before he shouted at me again.
Plum was still squatting, and for some reason half the gym had gone quiet or was offering to spot her. I shook my head and left.
Like she needed a spotter.
Time for Lunch
You know sometimes you do something without knowing why? You decide you'll do it then make up reasons or excuses to justify your actions. This was what I felt like as I headed home.
I blasted hot air into the car as I drove, warding off weather that had turned cold, even for me. The rain had morphed to that sort of hard rain you wish would turn to snow just for a change, but you know it won't. I got hot too quickly so turned it off, and drove out of the city and onto quiet country roads where the air was pure.
The closer I got, the more I knew I was making up reasons to go home. Yes, I wanted to see Kate, and yes, I was hungry, but I could have called her, and got something to eat from any number of places in the city.
I could have joined the miserable people at the chains that have sprung up like the death knell of old business. Where coffee tasted different to the next place, where burgers were made with proper buns that never fall apart in hands and where you weren't expected to serve yourself then clean up afterward and pay for the privilege. That's not too much to ask, is it? Actually paying and getting real food, real service?
So I could have gone to one of the few remaining individual places like Madge's and got something to eat, but something told me to go home and I didn't know what. I was floundering, looking for reasons, when normally I would be hot-on-the-heels of my prey, doing my enforcer job and not letting myself get distracted.
I looked up at the sky as I drove, hoping Intus was ensuring a nuclear meltdown wasn't going on someplace and we'd all be crispy or contaminated by the end of the day. No point worrying about that—some things are beyond the control of us all.
Driving down the bumpy mud track to our new home, I felt the weight of the city lift. I hadn't noticed how tense I was, but my shoulders relaxed, my muscles unbunche
d. I realized my tattoos had been slightly agitated, hints of magic bubbling away beneath the surface in case of need.
I smiled. I'd wanted a return to the old days as far as work went, and I had it, with knobs on, and look what had happened. What made me happy was coming home, not going out.
Shaded by trees on both sides, the drive suddenly opened out to the land fronting the house and the large clearing in the forest. It's totally secluded, private and perfect. As if it knew how happy I was to be home, the sun peeked from behind the clouds. Rays of golden delight hit the garden like a gift from an angel—maybe I'd done something to get into one of their good graces.
Color and contentment was what I thought of when I saw our little piece of paradise, and even the mess the chickens had made didn't put a damper on my spirits.
I noted that Kate had put them back in their compound rather than giving them the freedom of the garden, so she'd had better luck than my early morning struggle. The trees were bright and lush with new late spring growth, the air tinged with the smell of damp earth and a purity you never find even in rural areas skirting large cities, but Cardiff is small, the countryside pristine. I hated to admit it, but Rikka had done me a massive favor giving me such a gift.
Getting out of the car, I grabbed my trashed jacket and stuffed the tie in a pocket. Kate came out of the front door of the cottage, unaware I was home, humming to herself and bending to tend geraniums in pots she was determined to grow to bring a splash of color right up to the house. The herbs Grandma had picked and helped plant—meaning she told me where to dig holes—were flourishing, and all in all it was just perfect.
My stomach growled again as I headed to the house. Kate looked up as she heard me approach, and smiled. God, what a smile. It still felt odd, this slice of normality, as if we were regular folk that had gone off to live in the country and weren't part of this strange Hidden world that would make Regulars freak if they knew about it.
But here I was, whistling and feeling great, smiling at my vampire girlfriend as she tended geraniums like it was all entirely normal.
