91. Get organized.
Nothing makes you feel more out-of-control than disorganization. If your financial system involves bills and important documents scattered around the house or stuffed in drawers, it's hard to feel confident about yourself and your skills at money management. Having an organized financial system can save you time and reduce the stress of not being able to put your hands on something when you need it. To get organized, you need to create a workable system to track your financial information—everything from spending to retirement plans. A system will help you pay bills on time, track your expenses, and easily see how your investments are performing.
Action Steps:Begin by gathering all of the paperwork, bills, receipts, and documents you have scattered in various places. Create stacks for each type of paperwork (bills, mortgage document, insurance, etc.), and arrange them by date. Organize these stacked piles into separate file folders or boxes, labeled with what they are. If you have some information or documents on your computer, write a list of all of these. Here is a good outline for setting up a basic filing system for all of the documents you've gathered. Consider reducing paper by setting up online bill pay and banking, and learn to use an online personal finance system like Quicken, so you can view all of your accounts in one place.
92. Create a debt payoff plan.
In a culture driven by consumerism, getting into debt can happen without much thought or effort. It's easy to convince ourselves we need the latest and greatest of everything, from iPhones to cars. Our bad spending habits are compounded by high interest rates, making it even harder to stay on top of debt. Having financial debt not only impacts your confidence and financial future, it also can make you sick. According to an Associated Press-AOL Health poll, the stress from being in debt can cause migraines, anxiety, ulcers, severe depression, and even heart attacks.
Action Steps: Paying off debt will require living below your means and perhaps finding other sources of income until the debt is paid. Start with your smallest debt first. It will be the easiest to pay off, and checking this debt off your list will give you a boost of confidence and motivation to tackle the rest. Read this article by finance expert Dave Ramsey on paying off debt.
93. Find leaks.
If you check your monthly bank statement and wonder where all of your money is going, it might be leaking out in unintentional ways. Often we spend of things we don't really want or need, or we have recurring expenses we've forgotten about and don't use, but we've neglected to cancel them. Money can trickle out of our pockets in a variety of ways, and you might as well light a match to some of your bills if you don't plug the leaks. Finding these leaks is especially important if you're trying to pay off debt.
Action Steps:Begin by tracking your spending for a month. Carry a small notebook, or use your smartphone, and make note of everything you spend. If others in your family are spending as well from the same bank account, ask them to spend on a cash-only basis for a month and give them a set amount of cash. Review any automatic payments on your bank and credit card statements to make sure you aren't being charged for things you no longer want.
94. Streamline your expenses.
In addition to finding leaks in spending, you can save money (or help pay off debt) by consciously streamlining your spending. So much of our spending is unconscious—a few lattes at Starbucks, an impulse purchase at the mall, a few extra grocery items because we shop while hungry. By cutting out these unnecessary purchases, you'll not only save money, but also you'll feel more disciplined and mindful about your spending decisions.
Action Steps:The best way to streamline expenses is by creating a budget. You have some fixed expenses like a mortgage payment, but other expenses can be cut back or eliminated entirely. Review your bank statements and credit card bills to see any expenses you can eliminate from your budget. Determine your budget for variable items like entertainment, travel, food, clothing, etc. Consider a cash-only system for spending on these variable items. Whatever budget you create, be sure it is less than the amount you earn.
95. Learn about investing.
Investing is putting your money to work for you so you can make money from your existing money. People are often intimidated by investing, so they avoid learning or hand off the responsibility to someone else. However, if you don't know anything about investing, you won't feel assured your advisor is doing a good job or if they understand your financial goals. You might not know if you're being charged fairly for financial services or racking up too many investment fees that benefit the broker rather than you. Learning the basics of investing doesn't need to be intimidating—it will give you the confidence to make sound decisions about your investments.
Action Steps:Start by learning some basic terminology of investing by doing some online research. Learn the differences between stocks, bonds, mutual funds and certificates of deposit (CDs). Understand more about compound interest. Research basic financial theories such as portfolio optimization, diversification and market efficiency. Here's a great list of basic investing books from the Wall Street Journal.
96. Meet with a pro.
Do you have a decent knowledge of investments? Do you enjoy reading and researching about investing? Do you have time to monitor and evaluate an investment portfolio? If you answered "no" to these questions, you'll feel a lot more confident about your investment decisions with the help of a financial advisor. A good advisor will help you understand your financial goals; suggest what to do differently, how much to save, and various types of retirement accounts. They'll advise you on your mortgage, insurance, and taxes. Then they'll create a plan of action with specific steps to achieve your goals. You want to be sure to hire a financial adviser who is required to put your financial interests as a top priority.
Action Steps: Begin looking for a good financial advisor. Look for someone who is a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). This is a significant credential as the advisor must pass a rigorous test administered by the Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards. Ask friends, family, and business associates for referrals for a good CFP. You can also search for a CFP on the Certified Financial Planner website. Contact the planner, and set up an initial meeting to discuss your financial goals.
97. Define financial freedom.
Financial freedom is more than just having a lot of money. It hinges on living around your values and prioritizing what is most important to you. We often have fear around money tied to our needs for freedom and security. These fears also reveal a belief that money is a scarce resource—there isn't enough to go around. We chase more and more money in an effort to assuage our fears and grab our piece of the pie. A scarcity mindset undermines confidence and cripples our career and financial decisions. The best way to gain financial freedom is to stop being a slave to money. Instead, use your core values as a guide to determine your life priorities. Focus your time, energy, and money on those priorities—even if it means living with less or making less money.
Action Steps:Review your core values. Does your life reflect and support those values? Do you spend most of your time focused on what is most important to you? How much money do you really need in order to live a balanced life centered around your values and priorities? What is the first step you can take to create a lifestyle that reflects your new definition of financial freedom?
98. Create financial goals.
If you don't know where you're going, how are you going to get there? With any life or career achievement, setting goals is the fastest way to success. If you want to achieve or gain something down the road that requires money—whether it's a new car, a college education for your kids, or retirement income—you need to have financial goals with specific actions and a timeframe to reach those goals. Creating and achieving financial goals makes you feel in control of your destiny and more confident in your ability to be disciplined and focused.
Action Steps:What are your short-term (in the next five years) and long-term (ten or more years) financial goals? Write a list of eve
rything you want to achieve or attain that will cost you money. For each list, prioritize those goals. Begin by saving $1000 for an emergency fund, and set an amount you can add to that fund each month. Then move on to the top goal on each list, and determine exactly how you are going to get from where you are now to where you want to be. What is your timeframe for reaching your goal? Break the goal down into small milestones you need to meet weekly, monthly, quarterly, and yearly. Automate any savings or payments you can to remove temptation to spend. Make it difficult to access any money you put toward savings.
99. Involve your spouse/family.
If you have a spouse and family, getting your financial house in order can't be done in isolation. Everyone in the household will be impacted by financial decisions and actions. You must involve your spouse or partner, and even your children when they are old enough to understand concepts around spending and saving. Money is often the biggest source of conflict with married couples, and most arguments center around spending and lifestyle choices. This is why it's so important to determine your core values as a couple and define financial freedom and financial goals for your family. Without this communication and agreement about mutual values and goals, your family will never be on sound financial footing.
Action Steps: Set up a time to meet with your spouse or partner to discuss each person's values and individual goals and dreams. From that discussion, work together to create your top family values, life priorities, and financial goals. Using this information as a guide, work together to determine a debt payment plan, monthly budget, and savings plan. Communicate your family values and priorities with your children, and think of ways they can participate in budgeting and saving.
Conclusion
When you lack confidence in one part of your life, it can feel like you simply aren't a confident person. You paint your entire life with a broad brushstroke of insecurity and doubt. Confidence problems train us to believe untruths about ourselves, and the powerful negative feelings of failure, embarrassment, or shame, make us wary of stepping on a potential emotional land mine. Why tempt fate if it's possible we might fall on our butts once again? We embrace our limiting beliefs as reality.
The feelings of low confidence don't define you or your essential worth. Everyone lacks confidence from time to time, and most people have pockets of insecurities that hold them back in certain parts of their lives. But remember, you don't have to be perfect to be successful, happy, and confident. Confidence is a state of mind that allows you to accept failures and flaws, move past them, and to even learn from them.
Confidence is a skill you can learn, practice, and improve over time, just like any other skill. Brain science has proven repetitive thoughts and actions actually rewire neural pathways to foster measurable change. When you practice confident actions and thoughts repeatedly, you will eventually feel confident. As your confidence grows, those pockets of insecurity and self-doubt will shrink and have much less power over your thoughts, emotions, and actions.
If you accept the premise that change is possible, that you can learn the skills of confidence, then begin taking some of the small steps outlined in this book to reinforce your confidence. In manageable increments, expose yourself to the things you fear. Decide on the actions you will take in the next few weeks related to the areas where you lack confidence and commit to yourself and others that you will follow through. Of course you'll feel insecure and uncomfortable at first, but the more you practice these actions, the easier it will become.
As a review, here's how I suggest you use this book to help boost your confidence:
• Read through the entire book once, making notes about any the life areas where you need to work on your confidence.
• Go back through the book again to review those specific life areas you want to work on and the ideas and Action Steps suggested.
• Select the most troublesome area of low confidence to work on first, and determine very specific actions based on the suggestions outlined in the book to work on over the next four to six weeks.
• Determine the time of day you'll work on those actions and a specific trigger or cue to remind yourself to perform the action.
• Expect to feel uncomfortable and resistant for the first few weeks. Try to manage your discomfort by reminding yourself it will diminish over time.
• Seek out accountability and support from a friend or family member by telling them about your confidence work.
• Acknowledge your small daily actions and reward yourself immediately after you take the action with something that makes you feel good.
• Track your feelings of confidence weekly as you work on these actions by scoring yourself from one to ten, with ten being very confident and one being very low confidence. Give yourself a baseline score before you begin taking the actions.
• Repeat this process for any additional areas of low confidence.
You will have times you forget to work on your confidence actions, or you have life disruptions that prevent you from taking the action. There will be days when you feel low and don't believe anything will ever change for you. Please don't use these setbacks as an excuse to quit or to believe "it just isn't working." Stay committed to the work. Affirm to yourself that you are growing more and more confident. Use these affirmations to support your daily efforts. Mentally intend that you are a confident, happy, successful person, and visualize yourself in that position. If you remain committed and diligent, you will notice an improvement in your feelings of confidence. The more you work at it, the stronger those feelings of confidence will be.
You have something valuable and beautiful to offer the world, your community, your friends and family. You have the intelligence, resources, and desire to reach your goals, create success as you define it, and become the person you want to be. You also have the power to build your confidence so you have the motivation and self-belief to make all of these things happen. Don't wait another day to take action. An extraordinary life awaits you.
Want to Learn More?
If you'd like to learn more about confidence and self-esteem, please visit my blog Live Bold and Bloom for more articles, or check out my online course, Simple Self-Confidence.
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