by Mary Manners
Until now.
Shane leaned back and stared at the moon, brilliant in a clear night sky. Bullfrogs crooned and Maggie rolled over to sigh near his feet. What connection did Jade’s mother have to his parents? What could they possibly have in common? The question niggled at his thoughts, unnerving him. Whatever the connection, a sense of foreboding signaled it couldn’t be good. And Mrs. McAllister’s reaction seconded that. He sighed and guzzled what was left of the Mountain Dew, then crunched shards of ice that remained in the cup with his clenched teeth.
His parents were horrified by his career choice. Mentoring unruly teenagers all day long was no way to spend a life, according to them, and there was certainly no money in it. That was the real stumbling block, as far as they were concerned, even more than the beliefs they had no desire to share with their son. They reminded Shane at every opportunity how disgusted they were with the way he lived now. He was an insult to their class, and his father had cut him off when he refused to take on the business his parents had crafted nearly thirty years ago from a pile of blood, sweat, and old money. They flat-out refused to visit his three-bedroom home with a wrap-around porch and fenced yard for Susie to play in. No matter that he kept things as clean and neat as humanly possible with a dog and a kid in tow, and that Susie was happy and thriving.
Likewise, Shane balked at the idea of visiting them in the museum of a house where he’d grown up. The over-the-top lifestyle his parents enjoyed grated on his nerves and unearthed too many painful memories. He didn’t want Susie to grow accustomed to lavish gifts, all with an unspoken yet assumed price tag attached. The trap was so easy to fall into. He’d learned that the hard way. So had Reid.
Susie was content with the simple things Shane offered. The wooden play set complete with swings and a slide that took up a good portion of their backyard was a recent addition he’d constructed himself, along with the redwood picnic table Maggie liked to gnaw on. Gone was the upscale city apartment he’d called home before his accident, before he’d come to the church, before Susie. It was amazing how high-dollar furnishings and the latest flat-screen, hi-def TV could ease a man into thinking he owned the world and everyone in it. Well, that was the first mile on the road to disaster.
Shane listened through the screened window of Susie’s bedroom for sounds of movement, but heard only soft snoring. The kid was out like a light, having played game after game of freeze tag and hide-and-seek with Carly and Jade while he mowed. It was something to behold, Jade dashing around the front yard in her faded jeans and sneakers while Susie and Carly chased her, whooping like mad.
Man, she looked good in those jeans. Better than any woman had a right to. Shane figured Jade had no idea of the effect she had on him. Or maybe she did. He’d noticed her shiver despite the sultry, humid evening when his arm brushed against hers as he took a glass of iced tea from her. She was a paradox. Strong and opinionated, yet soft and compassionate, too. She had a way with Carly. Shane hadn’t seen the girl laugh so hard in the months he’d known her. Jade’s wry sense of humor and heartfelt advice had given her a temporary refuge from her problems.
The bewildered look on Mrs. McAllister’s face at the mention of his parents came to him once again. He pondered it uneasily and wondered if he dared ask Jade to shed any light.
****
“Mama, what were you and Shane talking about when I was with Carly?” Jade finished drying the last dinner plate and placed it in the cabinet. “You got so quiet when I came into the room.”
Her mother averted cautious eyes. “Oh, just this and that.”
Jade’s hand went to her hip. “What exactly is this and that?”
“Nothing much. He told me about his family, where he grew up. I didn’t know you went to school together.”
An uneasiness took root in the pit of her stomach. Something didn’t feel quite right here. “We didn’t really know each other. He hung out with an entirely different crowd.”
“I imagine he did.”
The way she said it made Jade wonder if her mom knew more. “Did he say anything else?” She hung the damp kitchen towel over the oven handle to dry.
“He asked me about you...why you won’t seem to let him get close.”
She frowned. “Oh. Mama! Shane said that?”
“Well, not in so many words, honey. But it’s obvious. You might as well put up the Great Wall of China.”
Jade grabbed a sponge from the sink and took out her frustration on the sauce-splattered cook top. Her scouring brought out a high-gloss shine. “I’m not ready to date anyone, and especially not Shane.”
“Why? Because he came from money?”
“You just don’t understand.”
“Maybe I don’t.” Winded, Mama settled into a chair and poured a cup of decaf hazelnut coffee from the carafe on the table. A rich, sweet aroma filled the air. “But, you know, Jade, some troubles are universal...blind to dollar signs.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just give the man a chance, honey. He can’t help where he came from, and he cares for you. That much, at least, is obvious.”
“What would you know about any of this?” Resentment bubbled over as old hurts returned to pierce daggers into her heart. A knot formed in Jade’s throat at the sight of her mother’s stricken face, but she plowed on. “Did you ever love any of them, Mama? Did you ever really care about any of the”—She choked over the word.—“the pathetic men you shared our home with?”
Her mother’s chin came up, and she stared Jade straight in the eye. “Sometimes life just brings us forks in the road—choices—that we’re not prepared to deal with. Age brings maturity...and wisdom. I made some bad choices, and they can’t be undone now. I loved your father. I loved him with all my heart and soul. You must believe that, Jade. Don’t doubt it, no matter what. Please.”
“Oh, Mama...” She swiped at the tears that filled her eyes and threatened to blind her. “Whatever happened, it couldn’t be so bad to make him go away and never want to come back. Why did he have to leave us? Why?”
Her mother seemed to age before her. Harsh light from the overhead fixture brought out deep creases across her forehead and ash-tinged folds below weary eyes. “I’m very tired, Jade. I-I think I’ll go to bed.” She grasped her coffee cup with both hands. Chair legs scraped across tile as she slipped swollen feet into terrycloth slippers.
“Wait.” Jade hesitated only a moment before she wrapped her arms around her mother’s frail shoulders. The scent of lavender, Mama’s favorite, swirled together with hazelnut and remnants of the spaghetti sauce they’d shared earlier. “I love you. I’m sorry.”
“I love you, too, honey. I really do.”
“Sleep well, Mama.”
“You, too.” She paused, turned. “Just be kind to Shane. Have a forgiving heart, whatever may come.”
“Whatever may come? What does that mean, Mama?”
Her eyes were distant, as if remembering something from the past. “Nothing, honey. Goodnight.”
Jade watched her slip down the hall without another word, leaving her there alone in the shadows to ponder the cryptic advice.
Mended Heart
6
“Jade, can you fix my hair?” Susie came skipping into the room, her face smudged with chocolate Pop-tart. Blonde hair fell like a fine, wavy veil over her shoulders. “Daddy was in a hurry this morning. The ’larm didn’t go off like it was s’posed to ’cause Maggie ate it.”
“Maggie ate it?”
“Yeah. She chewed the dials off, and the cord into a gazillion little pieces. Daddy didn’t even hear her. He slept right through it.”
Jade burst into laughter at the thought of Maggie devouring Shane’s alarm clock for breakfast. “Is Maggie OK?”
“Yeah. But Daddy was awful mad. His face got all red and Maggie hid under the bed. She wouldn’t come out till I gave her a cookie. He said Maggie’s gonna sleep in the doghouse tonight. But she’ll bark and whine for sure, and the
n he’ll let her in. I know he will. But if he doesn’t I’ll give her my special yellow fuzzy blanket so she won’t be too awful lonely out in the yard all alone.”
“I’m sure she’ll be fine.” Jade set aside the document she was working on and patted her lap. “Now, let’s see about your hair. Do you have a brush?”
“Course I do.” She fished in her backpack and found a pink one covered in princess decals along with a bottle of apricot-scented detangling spray. After handing them over, she turned and wiggled onto Jade’s lap.
“You’ve got pretty hair,” Jade said as she gently began to smooth tangles from the fine, wheat-blonde. “And it’s getting long.”
“Daddy says I have my mama’s hair.”
“She must have been very beautiful.”
“Daddy says so, but I don’t ’member. I have some pictures, though, in a special book he made for me. I was just a baby in them, and Mama held me lots. Daddy says she sang to me, too.”
“She must have loved you very much.”
“Yeah. More than the sun, the moon, and the stars all rolled together.”
The words tugged at Jade’s heart. How she longed for a child of her own to sing to and to rock to sleep. The children she taught in Chicago had filled a bit of the void, like a finger stuck in a weeping dam. But she still felt empty with the realization that children of her own might never happen. She brushed away a tear that swam in her eye and struggled to keep her voice even. “Hmm...that’s very nice.”
Susie twisted in Jade’s lap to look at her with wide, blue eyes. “Can you help me with somethin’ else?”
“I sure can try.” She drew in a breath and plastered on a smile. “What is it?”
“I need to make a birthday cake for Daddy. He’s gonna be really old tomorrow.”
Jade laughed. “Really old?”
“Yeah. Twenty-eight. That’s old! And I need a cake for him with lots of candles so he can make a wish, but I don’t know how to bake one. And besides, he won’t let me turn on the oven by myself, and if I ask him to help, it’ll ruin everything!”
“I think we can manage a cake,” Jade drew strands of hair into a neat French braid as she spoke. She bound the end with a thin pink band. “If you’ll help me, that is.”
“Oh, I’ll help.” Susie hopped off her lap. “I’m a real good stirrer. And I can crack the eggs, too, if you want. But sometimes the shells fall in.” She paused, frowned, then quickly brightened. “I’ll be extra careful, though.”
“Good.” Jade reached for a pen and paper. “Now, what kind of cake does your daddy like best?”
“Chocolate. With lots and lots of pretty sprinkles. And vanilla ice cream. We gotta have ice cream, too!”
“That sounds delicious.” Jade lowered her voice to a whisper and leaned in close, so her forehead touched Susie’s. “But we have to make a plan.”
“A plan?” Susie whispered and leaned her forehead against Jade’s. She pressed a warm, tiny hand to Jade’s cheek. “But I don’t know how.”
“It goes like this.” She held up one finger. “First, we have to figure out how to bake the cake without your daddy knowing.” A second finger rose. “Next, we have to decide when to give it to him.”
“I know, I know!” Susie squealed and began to hop up and down. “We could have a surprise party!”
“See, you do know how to make a plan. That’s a wonderful idea. Let’s make a list together.”
Footsteps pounded the hallway outside the door, and Shane’s voice came through the glass. “What’s going on in there, you two?” The office door suddenly swung open, startling Susie into silence. “It sounds like you’re having a party.” His questioning gaze fell on Susie. “Are you keeping Jade from doing her work?”
“No, Daddy. We’re making a list.”
“A list? What for?”
She gnawed on her lower lip. “It’s a secret.”
“What kind of secret?”
Jade glanced at Susie as if to say, “Let me handle this.” Susie nodded and juggled her brush from one hand to the other as Jade reached into the candy jar and pulled out a peppermint Lifesaver—Shane’s favorite flavor. She tossed it to him.
“Susie was just telling me about your morning.” She watched him unwrap the mint, his eyes studying her. “So, Maggie has a penchant for alarm clock breakfasts?”
He grinned ruefully and popped the mint into his mouth. His hair was damp, and it fell across his neck in thick tufts. “Apparently. It’s a wonder she didn’t electrocute herself.”
“Maybe you should invest in more chew toys.”
“My whole house is a chew toy from the look of things.” He rubbed the light stubble covering his jaw and sighed. “I had to leave the mess on the floor since I was already running late. I’ll have to sweep it up when I get home tonight. That’s something to look forward to.”
“Well, As long as you’re here, I need to ask you a favor.”
Shane leaned against the door frame. “Does this have something to do with the secret?” He leaned against the door frame, his eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Are you two cooking something up?”
“How’d you—”
Jade stepped in front of Susie and waved a hand to shush her. She plastered on a smile and grinned up at Shane. “Can Susie and I spend a few hours together after work? We need some...um...girl time.”
“Yeah, girl time!” Susie chimed in. “That’s it.”
Shane’s eyebrows knit together. “Girl time? What exactly is ‘girl time’?”
“It’s...um...” she stammered, figuring their goose was cooked, when Susie suddenly leapt forward to wrap her arms around Shane’s thighs.
“Look how pretty Jade fixed my hair. She braids real good. Can I go with her, Daddy? Please, pleeease!”
He pried her from his legs and hoisted her into his arms. “You do look very beautiful.” He sniffed her hair. “And you smell sweet, too.”
“Is it OK if I take her?” Jade’s gaze met his. “I promise I won’t bring her home late. I can drive her straight to your house when we’re done.” Inside she cringed at the thought of going to Shane’s. He probably lived in some upscale designer home in a gated community that would put the neat little whitewashed house she shared with her mom to shame.
“That would be nice. OK,” Shane agreed. “You two have a good time.”
“Oh, thank you, Daddy.” Susie kissed his stubbly cheek and hopped down from his arms. She turned and skipped from the room, singing the alphabet song.
****
Shane closed his office door and fell into the squeaky desk chair. He propped his elbows on the cluttered desk and leaned forward to cover his face with his hands. The sight of Jade giggling like a schoolgirl through the office door glass, conspiring with Susie, had him nearly undone.
She was growing to love Susie; that much was obvious. And he was growing to love her. But what would happen to all of them if Jade suddenly picked up and left town again? It would surely break Susie’s heart. And his, too. He needed to do what he should have done a long time ago but had selfishly neglected. He needed to confront the demons from his past head-on and finally put them to rest.
The conversation with Mrs. McAllister replayed once more, as it had done a hundred times since Friday. She had something to tell him, and he...well, he had things he needed to say to her, as well.
Shane sighed as he listened to Jade and Susie laugh down the hall and bowed his head to pray. He had ghosts from the past to lay to rest, and he needed to begin dealing with them now. But praying came first, always.
****
Choosing a cake batter and frosting was easy, but Susie labored over the decorations. She finally settled on colorful candy sprinkles and edible letters that Jade would help her use to spell out ‘Happy Birthday Daddy’ across the two-layer sheet cake. And there were spiral candles in neon shades of blue, green, and pink, along with a Barbie figurine on a pink four-wheeler that Susie insisted would make the cake just perfect.
/> Jade tossed several rolls of crepe paper streamers and a large package of colorful latex balloons into the cart. Susie also asked for a shiny helium Happy Birthday balloon that floated lazily along the ceiling in the floral department, so Jade added it to their order as well.
“Can we get Daddy a present, too?”
“Sure.” She scanned the contents of the cart and took a mental inventory to be sure they weren’t forgetting anything. “A birthday party’s not complete without presents. What did you have in mind?”
Susie frowned, considering. “I know! Daddy likes that movie about fires...um...Fireproof, I think it’s called. Do you know it?”
“No.” Jade shook her head. “I’ve never heard of it. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, well, Daddy likes the music in it. We can get him the...um...what’s it called?”
“Soundtrack?”
“Yeah. That.”
“Let’s go to the mall. There’s a music store inside.”
“Oh, we gotta get it. Daddy will be so surprised!”
“We will, honey. Don’t worry.” She glanced at her watch. It was inching toward evening. “Let’s pay for this and head to the mall. Are you hungry?”
“I guess. My tummy’s rumblin’.”
“We’ll eat and then go to the music store.”
“Is that a plan?”
Jade smiled and patted Susie’s cheek. “Yes, sweetheart, it is.”
****
Shane found Mrs. McAllister in the backyard of her house, knee-deep in dirt and kneeling on a garden mat, weeding her lush-green tomato seedlings. Tulips danced along the freshly-swept walk and lilac bushes, heavy with blossoms, sweetened the air. Birds chirped back and forth in a melody from nests neatly woven into flowering Bradford pear trees at the edge of the garden.
“Hello?” He called a heads-up as he approached. The last thing he wanted to do was startle her.
