“Thanks, Natalie. I don’t know how I can ever pay you back.”
Natalie pulled back. “You can take good care of yourself and that baby. Deal?”
Linn nodded.
Throughout the day, Linn was constantly on her mind. When she picked up the boys from her mom’s, she explained that Linn was temporarily staying at her house. The boys were excited, but she saw the concern in her mother’s eyes. Perhaps it wasn’t the ideal situation, but it was necessary, at least for the time being. She could hardly let Linn live on the streets.
When she arrived home and opened the door, a slight aroma of garlic assailed her. She walked through to the kitchen, following Taylor and Alex, who were calling Linn’s name.
“I’m in here,” Linn called.
They entered the dining room, where Linn had covered the table with a tablecloth and set the table.
“Its ready, if you’re hungry,” Linn said.
“Linn. You didn’t have to do all this.”
“I didn’t have anything else to do, and I want to be helpful. I cooked at home all the time. I’m, like, not such a great cook, though.”
Natalie slid her purse off her shoulder and walked into the kitchen. A pot of spaghetti sauce bubbled on the stovetop.
“Yummy, spaghetti!” Alex said.
“Go wash your hands, boys.” Natalie lifted the pot from the stove and poured it over the top of the cooked pasta while Linn removed a pan of garlic toast from the oven. “It smells wonderful.”
As they ate, the conversation was lively, and Linn seemed to bask in the praise from Natalie and the boys. She didn’t know how long Linn would be staying, but it was good to see Linn intended to be helpful while she was here.
After dinner, Linn insisted on loading the dishwasher while Natalie helped Alex with his Lego house. By the time she was finished, she was a whole hour ahead of her usual evening routine. She was glad, since she had a lot to talk about with Linn. There was the housing issue, the health insurance dilemma, and the problem of Kyle. Natalie knew she needed him to be her attorney, but Linn wouldn’t be one bit happy about it.
After she shooed the boys out to the backyard to play hide-and-seek, she poured Linn a glass of root beer and joined her in the living room. Linn’s eyes were glued to the Jeopardy game on TV.
“Thanks,” Linn said when Natalie handed her the soda.
Natalie settled on the opposite end of the couch. “I sent the boys outside so we’d have a few minutes to talk. I’m sorry your dad reacted the way he did.”
Linn shrugged. “I knew he’d get all mad. I just didn’t think he’d toss me out right that minute, though, you know? I thought he’d at least let me work something out.”
Linn went quiet then, and Natalie thought the pain of her father’s act must be hitting home. She tried to put herself in Linn’s place and imagine what it would feel like to have her father wash her hands of her so easily.
“He wanted me to get an abortion.” The words were barely above a whisper. “He would’ve let me stay if I had an abortion.” Linn looked at her then, tears shining in her dark eyes.
Natalie’s stomach clenched. “How did that make you feel?”
Linn’s eyes fixed on Jeopardy again. “I’ve never felt he cared for me. Especially after Jilly’s death. But when he insisted I kill my baby … what’s worse than that? And then to throw me out of the house, pregnant and all.” Linn caught her lip in her teeth as she blinked back tears.
“It’s a bitter pill to swallow, Linn. You can’t change your dad, but you can focus on taking care of yourself and the baby. You’re doing the right thing.”
She nodded. “I know. And I don’t need him anyway. I think it’s better to be away from him.”
It was a sad thing for a girl to feel about her father, but Natalie suspected she might be right. Under the right conditions, she felt Linn could blossom into something special. Her father only filled her with self-doubt and insecurities.
They talked about doctors and health insurance for a while, and Natalie insisted Linn make an appointment with a doctor the next day. They decided to use the obstetrician Natalie had used for Taylor and Alex.
When the medical details were covered, Natalie knew she had to address the other issue. And this one was not going to be easy.
“I wanted to talk to you about the adoption process.” Natalie took a sip from her soda, more to stall than anything else. “I have a book you can read if you want. It cleared up a lot of details for me.”
When Linn expressed an interest, Natalie pulled it from the bookshelf and handed it to Linn. “The first thing I need to do is select an adoption attorney. Unfortunately, I’ve found there’s only one in Jackson Hole.”
Linn flipped through the pages.
“The nearest adoption attorney other than that one is hours away.”
“So use the one here.”
Natalie cleared her throat. “Well, that’s what I was thinking. I really couldn’t drive four hours away every time I had an appointment. I’d miss an entire workday.”
Linn didn’t seem to see the problem. Surely she knew her brother-in-law was an adoption attorney. She was too busy reading snippets from the book to put it together.
“Hey, listen to this,” Linn said. She read a fact about birth mothers that Natalie remembered reading weeks ago.
“There’s all kinds of interesting details in there,” Natalie said. She had to tell Linn about Kyle, and she wished she hadn’t handed Linn that book yet.
“Linn, here’s the thing. That adoption attorney, the only one in Jackson is, well, he’s Kyle Keaton. Your brother-in-law.”
Linn’s head shot up then. “What? You’re not, like, going to use him, are you?”
Natalie didn’t know what to say. Had Linn heard anything she’d just said? Surely she wouldn’t expect Natalie to drive four hours for every appointment just so Kyle wouldn’t be involved. “Linn, I know this must come as a surprise to you. But please take a minute and think about what I’m saying. Kyle is the only attorney in town suited to handle adoptions. The nearest one is—”
“I heard what you said! I don’t want him involved in this!” Linn crossed her arms over her chest, and Natalie thought she looked every bit of the teenager she was.
Her mind spun for ideas, angles that might make a nineteen-year-old pregnant girl with a grudge understand. “I know you have bitter feelings toward Kyle, but—”
“He killed my sister!” Linn’s eyes narrowed stubbornly.
Natalie sighed. This was going even worse than she’d thought. She injected her tone with a measure of patience. “If we’re going to work out all the details of this adoption, we’re going to have to communicate better than this, Linn. Will you please let me finish my thought, and then you can respond, OK?”
Linn only looked back at the TV.
Natalie took her silence as acquiescence. “First of all, I want you to consider—and this is going to be hard—but please, just consider for a moment that maybe Kyle isn’t the monster you believe he is.”
Linn stiffened but still stared at the TV.
“I know you think he killed your sister, but isn’t it possible it was just an accident? A terrible, unthinkable accident? He was driving, and he ran a light. Careless, yes. But murder?”
Linn’s jaw worked, and Natalie knew she was only making her angrier by the moment. But the girl needed to face reality. She’d needed someone to blame for Jilly’s death, and Kyle was the convenient one.
“Kyle was only distracted by the … conversation he was having with your sister. He never meant to—”
“You’ve already met with him.” The accusation was in her voice and her eyes.
“It wasn’t like that. I haven’t formally met with him, but we’ve been talking, and I really think—”
“What are you, like, dating him or something?” She had enough sass in her voice to fill a canyon. “You said you weren’t.”
She gritted her own teeth. Patience, N
at. “No, Linn. I’m not dating him.”
“’Cause he cheated on my sister, you know. He was a two-timing jerk, and I don’t care what you say. He wanted her dead so he could run off with his girlfriend!”
Natalie’s breath caught in her lungs. It wasn’t true, was it? Kyle cheating on his wife? She couldn’t reconcile that with the Kyle she was beginning to know.
“Yeah, he didn’t tell you that part, did he?”
Natalie shifted in her seat and tried to gather her thoughts. This last piece of news had shaken her more than it should. Why did she care so much if Kyle had cheated on his wife? What was it to her? Maybe an overdeveloped sense of righteous anger from a woman who’d been duped by her own husband?
But it wasn’t anger she felt. That yucky feeling curdling in her stomach felt more like supreme disappointment. And there would be only one reason for that. She shrugged off the thought. Regardless of what Kyle had done, she still had no other option for an attorney. Linn was just going to have to adjust to the idea.
“Look, I know you feel Kyle has hurt you and your family. I’m sorry about that. Truly. But I still have no other option. You won’t hardly have to see him, anyway, and he’s offered a huge discount because of the situation—”
“He knows it’s me?” Linn drilled her with a glare.
“No, I haven’t mentioned you by name. He only knows it’s a client of mine.”
Linn snapped her head back toward the TV. “Then why’s he giving you a discount?”
“I guess he supports what we’re trying to do at the center. It’s a substantial discount, and it would really help.”
“Like you need help.” She gestured around the great room. “You’re obviously loaded. You can afford any attorney you want.”
Natalie gave a wry laugh. Linn had no clue. Nothing could be further from the truth. But then she remembered the tiny shack that Linn had lived in with her father. It was only natural that she’d take one look at this place and assume Natalie had it made.
“Don’t let the house fool you. I only have it because my ex-husband owned a bank, and I got it free and clear in the divorce.”
Linn shifted, and Natalie thought she saw something flicker on the girls face. Maybe she was starting to make sense.
“I don’t earn much at the center. If this house weren’t paid off, there’s no way I’d be able to afford it. I don’t have a bunch of money sitting around, and I was really starting to wonder how I would be able to afford the adoption until Kyle offered to do it for less.”
“So, you’re saying if I don’t want you to use Kyle, you’re not going to adopt the baby?”
“Calm down, Linn, that’s not what—”
“That’s how it sounded to me. It sounds like you’re threatening to back out if I don’t go along with what you want!”
“I’m not backing out. I’m only saying we don’t have another option.”
“Well, you’re not the one who holds all the cards. Maybe I don’t want you to have this baby anymore!”
The patio door few open. “Mom, Taylor’s being a big baby!”
Taylor rushed through behind his brother, crying. “Alex is cheating!”
Natalie got up and went to mediate the sibling bickering. If only there were someone to mediate the conversation between her and Linn.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Linn tugged on her Bubba’s T-shirt and slid into her favorite pair of jeans. She couldn’t believe she’d hung around in pajamas all morning. It had been so quiet when she’d awakened, she’d known Natalie and the boys must have been gone. She’d been relieved at first.
But then as the morning crawled by and her mind replayed the argument she’d had with Natalie, she wished Natalie were home. Anything to stop the anxiety buzzing through her.
What had she done last night? She’d practically told Natalie she didn’t want her to adopt the baby. Linn rubbed her rounded belly with her hand. Stupid, stupid. As if she had women waiting in line to adopt her baby. As if she had anyplace else to live right now.
Why had she run off to her room last night like a spoiled brat? She went to the bathroom she was sharing with the boys and pulled her hairbrush through her hair. Maybe Natalie wouldn’t want the baby now. Maybe Linn had ruined everything with her big mouth and bad attitude. She had a chance to place her baby with his or her real brothers and a loving mom, and she’d probably blown it.
Would it really be so awful if Natalie used Kyle? What she’d said about Jilly’s death being an accident had struck a chord with her. Was it possible Linn’s family had overreacted or been too quick to blame him?
Regardless, she’d determined one thing this morning. If she wanted Natalie to adopt her baby—and she did, more than anything in the whole world—she was going to have to compromise about Kyle. He already ruined their lives once. There was no way she was going to let him stand in the way of her baby’s future.
Natalie hadn’t focused on anything all day. All she could think about was the argument she’d had with Linn last night. She should’ve waited to have the conversation about Kyle. What had she been thinking? The girl had just been kicked out of her home by her father. Her whole future was up in the air, and Natalie had gone and heaped another problem on top of her.
She shook her head. Not the brightest move, Nat. She looked at her watch, pleased to see that it was almost time to go. She wanted to resolve things between her and Linn tonight, even if they couldn’t come to an agreement about Kyle.
When closing time rolled around, Natalie left to get the boys. Her mom wanted to talk, but the boys were eager to get home to Linn. “I’ll call you later, OK?” she said. She knew her mom was probably concerned about her taking in Linn, but what was the harm? Once her family got to know Linn, they’d see she wasn’t some leech coming to suck up all their time and money.
When they walked in the door, the boys ran to the kitchen. “Linn, we drawed a picture for you!” Taylor called.
“Hush, dummy, it’s a surprise!” Alex said.
“Alex. Apologize.”
He mumbled, “Sorry,” with less sincerity than Natalie would have liked.
They entered the kitchen, but Linn wasn’t there. A stone formed in Natalie’s stomach. What if she’d left? What if she really didn’t want Natalie to have the baby anymore?
Her gaze darted around the kitchen, around the living room for some sign of Linn. Nothing.
“Where’s she at, Mom?” Alex asked.
“I don’t know.” Maybe she had to work tonight. But Natalie thought she only worked until five today.
Upstairs. She’d check her room. Her feet flew as rapidly as her mind. What if Linn had taken off with no thought of where she’d go? What if she ended up staying with people she hardly knew? She could unknowingly put herself in danger. And all because Natalie had bombarded her with too much.
And what about the baby? If Natalie had decided anything today, it was this: she loved and wanted Linn’s baby. She’d begun to think of the baby as hers and was looking forward to raising another child more than anything.
Her feet took the stairs two at a time, then she entered the spare room. Her breath left her body. There on the dresser were Linn’s pajamas and her purse.
“She’s outside, Mom!” Alex’s voice called from downstairs.
Natalie took a minute to gather herself. Everything was fine. Linn was fine; the baby was fine. Linn must not be too angry if she hadn’t left.
Natalie trotted down the stairs and slid out the patio door. The boys and Linn stood around the grill, where Linn was tending half a dozen hamburger patties. She turned as the door slid open.
“Hi, there.” Natalie tested the waters and was relieved when Linn smiled.
“Hi. Hope you all like hamburgers.”
“I like mine plain,” Alex said.
Linn laughed. “That’s so boring.” She tousled his hair.
The picnic table had already been set with paper plates and cups. “You don’t have to
cook dinner every night, Linn. You’re going to spoil us.”
“I don’t mind.”
When Natalie retrieved the condiments from the refrigerator, she saw a freshly made salad and pulled it out, too.
They ate together on the patio, exchanging quips about their days. Linn made the boys laugh with her exaggerations about the tourists who ate at Bubba’s. Cleanup after dinner was a snap because of all the paper ware, so by the time Natalie fixed one of Alex’s broken trucks, it was still too early for baths.
They settled on the couch and watched Finding Nemo. Afterward, Natalie helped Taylor with his bath while Alex took a shower, then she tucked them in bed.
When she went downstairs, Linn had poured her a glass of Diet Pepsi and turned the TV to a sitcom. Natalie sank onto the couch with a weary sigh and felt an awkward silence settle around the room. She felt the need to address last night’s conversation, but wasn’t sure how to bring it up without causing another argument. Linn had been her old self since she’d been home, but how did she feel now about the adoption? She was afraid to ask.
“I’m sorry about what I said last night,” Linn said.
The words took Natalie aback and warmed a place deep inside her. “No, Linn, I’m the one who’s sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you about Kyle last night, not after the day you’d had.”
“I didn’t mean it.” She shook her head as if for emphasis, and her eyes seemed to be a bit glassy. “I want you to adopt my baby more than anything. If you need to use Kyle to get it done, then I can live with that.”
Natalie could hardly believe what she was hearing. She’d hoped to reconcile with Linn, but she hadn’t imagined the girl would change her mind about Kyle. “Thanks. That’s very mature of you.”
“So you still want my baby?” Fear flickered in her chocolate-brown eyes.
It hadn’t occurred to Natalie that Linn might be worrying about that. Judging by the look on her face, she’d been stewing about it all day. She reached out for Linn’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “Oh, honey, more than anything. Don’t ever doubt that.”
Saving Grace Page 18
